Over here, the last thing pulled out is a gun...so to have a copper wave his gun at me...he has serious mental health issues..

I know it may seem facetious in my reckoning, not intended that way...I truly looked at the differences...and a copper with his gun out, directed at me, is probably the scariest of all..(we don't have the same gun laws...they are the only ones allowed to carry)...under the uniforms, there are the same flawed human beings as everywhere, difference is, they have the illusion of power.

I asked Stephen this question,in response to these threads....

'Would you have preferred to have asked me out, or for a walk, or whatever, than me having done the asking?'

'Was it emasculating to have me ask you, and to let you know how I was feeling about you?'

To the first question, his response was...' No, it was refreshing, to have a confident, comfortable in her own skin woman, share her feelings, without any attachment to the answer. I felt quite relieved to know how you felt, as I could then share with you how I was feeling, for you.'

he went on to say...'At our age Lee, (him,53 and me, 47)...we have out grown all the games attached to courting, and don't need a heap of confusing contradictory signals, to express what it is we want. Imagine taking the whole game playing behaviours of courting into the intimacy part of a relationship, how quickly it would unravel.'


he laughed at my second question, and responded with...'Emasculating? Remember I am a Leo, with a Scorpio moon...my masculinity does not evolve around a woman playing fair maiden, if anything, I was flattered, and pleased with your confidence, I felt MORE male.'


I wonder if other men, feel a similar thing to Stephen....?

It depends....is it a random stranger?....just the one? I know I would fight.

Is it a police officer?...I would be very quiet and extremely passive if it was a police officer with a gun...I trust them less than a random scary person.

If my world fell to bits tomorrow who would walk through my door to support me?

If someone else's world fell to bits tomorrow whose door would I walk through to support them?

The answers to those questions, are ...the people who call me friend, and the people I call friend.

and realistically....it would get really crowded in here, (at my house)....and I would walking through a lot of doors.

My partner is my best friend, and the rest are dear friends.

Hmmm... it's that fascinating multitudinal perspective thing....one person's humble, is another person's arrogance.


Humble in means and assets?

Humble in outlook and behaviour?

Is it a religious-based humbleness?

When someone states I am a humble person...I ask...what do you mean by humble? How are you humble?...Why do you believe you are humble?

On the 17th September, Lara lee made her entrance into our world...a daughter for my eldest son Kevin, and his partner Amy...

<------this is Lara and her daddy, my firstborn...when Lara was 3 days old.

I just wanted to share a photo of them, especially for you long timers who know about my mob, and my world...

I didn't ask Stephen out, I just walked up to his bus, and said, if you are not doing anything, want to take a walk on the beach under the full moon?

And whilst we were walking, I shared that I found myself very drawn to him as a person, and attracted to him as a man.

I also said it was ok, if it wasn't reciprocated, I just felt the need to share that with him.

Turns out it was the same for him....and 6 months later we are still deeply enjoying the adventure of us, my 4 kids, and his 7 kids....and all that life together offers.

I dunno...it found me....he literally walked through my front door 6 months ago, and we have spent a grand total of 16 days apart..

I honestly and totally accepted that I had already been fortunate to have that one great love in my life, and that the rest was as a single, contented entity...besides, I am an opinionated, cantankerous, set in my ways, lone wolf kind of a person....so couldn't imagine anyone being remotely silly enough to even notice me.

I used to joke with my girlfriends, and say ' if there was someone out there in the ether for me, he best be me, in the male form'...and he is.

I didn't find love, I met a gentle, kind, calm, peaceful soul, who sees me....the inner me....and fell in love with me....(it's even strange typing it! )...and I him.

It depends if it is a continuing whining theme, heard over and over again, like a seriously broken record...and nothing is done to change the outcome...

you would hear a ' For F * C K's sake, get over it, and get on with it'

an old saying of my mum's was ' S h * t or get off the pot '...so you can see where it comes from..

I have no interest in the whiney victim who just wants to moan and groan, and do absolutely nothing to change it.

I have been abused as a child, I have been raped as an adult, I've been bashed, beaten and left for dead...and I would still be back there if I hadn't dragged myself up by the bootlaces, and 'got over it'....I do allow people their own process, their own time, to heal and move forward...I don't play the perpetual victim/rescuer game though, not for anyone, including myself.

I recently discovered I have a healthy respect/caution/fear of giant cranky mastiffy/bull araby type dogs, that leap at me with teeth bared...

it took a completely mangled straw broom to recognise that was supposed to be my arm, that this dog was really ticked off, and didn't like people!!!

Am I scared of all dogs?...nup...Any dogs?...just a giant black and white cranky one..

Their smile, their energy, their eyes, their energy....the vibe they give off...it's not merely a physical thing, it's definitely their energy.

Create a shelter....for me, one that is weather proofed....and being here in Australia...extreme heat and prolonged drought, massive cyclones, floods, intense wildfires...and that's only if the changing weather patterns remain as they are today for the duration of my remaining 1000 years.

I would need to protect myself from venemous snakes, dogs, and various unhappy arachnids, initially, as I imagine the animal world would have years of population explosions, and declines, while they all sort out natural attrition, once the primary predator is gone.

So shelter, may look different than what it is today, for me.

I can't imagine I would have an interest in learning to fly a plane, so would only sail to other countries, and even then, close neighbours...so my imaginings remain on this country's surface...

Create a shelter, a safe place to rest, I am imagining I am not the last living creature on the planet, merely the last human?

...and probably spend a few years creating food sources, or 'maps' - even if they are only mental maps - to food sources, clothing, shelters, water sources.

...clean up areas....am I left with a gazillion dead human carcasses?

...sail, surf, sing, play with animals that allow me near them and don't want to eat me..

....watch Gaia reclaim her skin, and rebuild her outer self...OMG!!! watch a tree grow from seed to ancient!...watch cities collapse, and be reclaimed by forests!

OMG! JB....what a privelege it would be!

Geeez Chrissy!....job = 1 dimension...of YOU

Home alone = 1 dimension of YOU

Mother to gorgeous girls = 1 dimension of YOU

On here = 1 dimension of YOU

Daughter to your parents = 1 dimension of YOU

Dreaming your dreams = 1 dimension of YOU

Renovator extraordinairre = 1 dimension of YOU

Friend to your loves = 1 dimension of YOU


Shall I go on?...Lovely, YOU are a multi-dimensional being...we all are...even now.


I really admire the person I am becoming, I would choose me as a friend.

I love my life, and am incredibly content with every aspect of it.

Defenses?....nup.

Defenceless?...yep!

Every day is still a gift, a first day, a new moment.

I adore him more, respect him more, and enjoy him more with each day we choose to share together.

I love what I recognise in him, and this incredible opportunity to learn Him.

As a guy, I'm curious about women and why they do certain things.

Such as:

When complimented on her clothes by another woman, they feel the need to go into a backstory about how they obtained said clothing and the deal they got on them.

They are showing you that clothing and looking good is important to them.



They go to the bathroom in small groups after complaining the night before about how long the lines are to the bathroom.


It's a herding instinct, safety in numbers, pack thing....don't try to fathom it...it isn't logical, it's social/emotional.



They go shopping for a jacked, are gone for 6 hours, and come back with a pair of shoes, two belts, a purse, and no jacket.


Because they didn't find the jacket they had their mind on...simple.


My male brain is of course completely unable to rationalize any of this using science, mathematics, physics, or any type of known logic. Ladies, can you please shed some light on this?



It isn't logical, it's emotional....men think...women feel....it's really quite simple.

I am easy for people to learn....not so easy to know....contradictory, contrary, multi-dimensional....do we ever really 'know' anyone....sometimes many of us don't even 'know' ourselves, let alone others...

He is....about 1500 miles away at my house...I am at my eldest son's home,almost at the other end of Australia, soaking up their amazing 5 day old baby girl....being a granny!!!!

no....but he's waiting for me!!!!!!!!!!

LIFE!!!!

and living every second of it....

our newest little family member...a granbaby girl...and her daddy, my eldest boy when he looks into her tiny face...

the smile on Stephen's face when I walk through the door...

when my youngest son comes home from boarding school...

LIFE!!!!

cuddles from my youngest child, and all her breathless exciting news...

my eldest girl's laugh and her singing with joy when she thinks no-one is listening...