A person who chooses to have a clandestine, deceptive liason with someone outside of their primary relationship is usually quite low in self esteem, and is attempting to bolster self esteem through another, rather than become self sustainable, and actually do the work.

Relationships are funny things....we have the initial spark, and wonderment, the 'dazzle'...of newness....then we move into comfortable-ness....having learnt enough of each other to have a sense of predictability in each other...from there can often come complacency....taking each other for granted...assumptions, expectations....and gasp! obligations!

suffocating!

the addiction to the new-ness...the 'dazzle'...the excitement, the drama....getting self esteem 'fed' externally...whilst also creating decption...the addiction to the deception....diminishing the partner through behaviour, speech...attempting to elevate one's self.


ridiculous.

Do the work...develop a healthy self esteem yourself....not through others....and the whole infidelity with deception thing becomes redundant....you don't require your self esteem 'fed' externally...you become the author of your own story in an authentic and harm free way.

Experience is the happening...knowing is the thinking of the happening and arriving at a belief, or an understanding.

It is when there is more chance of snow in hell than in my back yard!....we get all sooky and wimpy when it hits 6 degrees celcius!

Errr........ what day is it??? Is it morning yet???


I got busy living...and am even more busier now...

creating a community garden with a mob of other like minded greeny hippie types...

supporting a mob of parents in creating a home school co-operative...

facilitating meditation classes...

music lessons two days a week...

the ukelele club once a week..,

band rehersals every friday at our place..(Asylum)

Picking avocados for a friend...working in a j.o.b.....a handfull of days for school fees...

gardening...and creating a food forest in the yard...

and about to zoom off to a coral atoll for three days with the most divine human being that has walked into my life....turquoise seas, white sands, coral cays, sunshine, a hammock, and completely alone...whoo hoo!...doing a Robinson Crusoe on a deserted island with the love of this lifetime...

The way of this lifestyle, societally, politically and ethically, is showing it is unsustainable...the accumulations of debts, both personally and country, the illusionary ethos of shares and stocks....the whole illusionary concept of money as an energy exchange...

Greed based mentality is unsustainable...we are all inter-connected irrespective of our mindsets...the mere fact we all share a coomon address, this planet shows this...as this continues to break down and fragment, those who are resilient, and aware....or awake move quietly and purposely towards co-creating sustainable communities...where energy conversion is more about the greater good of all...and working together.

More is not more....the have more, get more, want more easily discarded, instant gratification mentality is madness....pure insanity, and not part of our herding mentality as the human animal...co-existing is the instinctual.

Nothing.....no holding back....mo sectioning and compartmentalising...


I have stubbed my toe on steps a gazillion times...if I used the mentality many have hear, I would have only ever used a step once!


Life is about living, loving, learning, and growing UP.

YOU own your decisions, no one else....you own how you react to a situaton, no one else!

Throw out the expectations, and get living...suspicion, and fear based existing is so painful, small and isolating.

Live large, and love large.

A man walked through my door with a mutual friend almost three months ago...and is living full time, one hundred percent here, in my home, now our home, doing exactly what people are supposed to be doing..LIVING, LOVING, LAUGHING AND CELEBRATING this amazing moment in time.....I have no room for suspicion, games and fear....be real, be brave and be ALL of you.

I can't speak for mainstream medical procedures in the US, however, here in Australia, an episiotomy, which is a small incision made in the perineum, (the strong fibrous tissue between the base of the outer vaginal walls and the anus)...usually an inch long incision requiring 3 or so disolvable sutures is all that is required, ONLY in the cases of a vaginal delivery running the risk of tearing...a small clean straight incision is preferrable to tearing, as the scarring is minimised, and healing times, much quicker.


The vaginal walls are extremely elastic, and evolution has made sure that we are designed to deliver naturally, however, in saying that, extremely narrow pelvic cavities and large babies do not mix, then caesarians are recommended, and usually administering an epidural block is preferrable to a general anaesthetic.

The quickest way to receive an education on ALL procedures involving childbirth is to enrol in a prenatal birth clss, where all options are discussed and dvds are available to help you make an educated decision on how best to deliver a newborn.


I have been blessed with 4 children, all of them natural deliveries, no tearing, nor interventions required, no drugs, and all of them quick deliveries, ranging from an hour and a half to two and a half hours....education....education....education...I am cringing here wondering who on earth can get to this age and not know how one's vagina works, but can contemplate pregnancy.

Right where I am...coastal queensland..

I dunno...


it hasn't been the case for me at all.....somehow the exact mirror of all that I am appeared.

For him to be all of him...for him to not waver from his path, his choices, his growth....and for him to recognise the reciprocal wants I have for me.

We share a space, an energetic space co-created by both of us, where we can come together in it....inside and outside of that co-created space, we are two growing, evolving human beings...with different journeys.

I want for him to experience and to be love without condition.

I haven't found it to be an effort....I have found it to be the opposite....effortless...because it is what both of us want.

Logistics are the same irregardless of going off to visit a lifelong friend, or a potential new one...the word effort feels like it is a chore, or hard work...not my thing at all...when meeting new people.

In the OP's question, there is no reference to women not wanting to marry someone after he is 'caught'....


Not everyone requires marriage in a romantic relationship.

Why would I demand some ridiculous promise of presumed fidelity and alleged emotional, social and owned security in this thing you call marriage.


Right now I am 'married' to this moment's life partner...'married' in the true meaning of the word...not the church based meaning of the word.

..to this moment's life partner....we are right in this moment choosing to partner in this part of our lives, however, being constantly growing evolving humans, there can be no promise of expectation in any other part of our lives not yet lived....I don't wish to stop growing, to stop evolving....to be 'secure'...I want a BIG personal life....as does he.

We all only have us, right now, in this moment...as we are....there is not assuredness of who we may be in the next moment, or the next, or the next.


I would rather have this moment right now, in all it's bliss and easiness, than a contrived promise of the unknown.

You would stay at Asylum, with it's current inmates...(us)...we would walk down to the beach....watch the right handers from the point...move our way over to Workman's Beach, go for a swim, watch the dolphins play, perhaps catch a tail slapping humpback as she heads to warmer currents..


take you for a cruise out to watch the Eastern grey Roos graze in long shadow afternoon...

then move onto sunset at The Tree bar, at 1770 to watch the sunset over water...(only place on the east coast)...


as the Milky Way unveils her magnificence,gather down the back, behind Asylum, in the valley with campfire, friends, guitars, djembes, wine and song..

Walking through this day I hear the plight
of ludicricy take it's last gasp.

The get mores, got more....debt.
The have nots, have not....hope.
The want mores, want more....time.

Walking through this day I feel the quiet
desperation of the trusting quiver.

Where will they lay their heads down at night?
Who will hear their hearts break?
How will they create safety in their souls?


When the current currency of Life does not exist
who will remember the planet, our Home, the source of all we have?


Wealth will be determined by who will eat on this day.

Respectful personal truth.

How can I not be independent...I am the only one in this body!

Does that mean I reject the capacity to share?....of course not!

Two independent people are merely two people responsible for their own emotions, their own actions, who choose as two whole people to share experiences together.

I can see forever
in your eyes,
Hear history untold
within your heartbeat,
Feel whole oceans
in your arms.

I can Love you
forever,
in this moment.

A gathering of amazing musicians, artists and creatives spent the full moon by a fire, under the trees, beside a river....laughter, music, voices lifted as one, celebrated a darling hearts birthday....new friendships, old friendships, and lovers together.


We love and celebrate the full moon here, every month...

No...most people don't speak up, under the guise of 'keeping the peace'...or as you guys over there say...'being nice'...

We don't over here..and I know when I shut my gob, rather than speak my truth...sure as sh* te I will lose my voice within the week.