Topic: another Joke | |
---|---|
John goes to his friend Tony and says ...
"I'm sleeping with the priest's wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?" The friend doesn't like it but being a friend, he agrees. After mass, he starts talking to the priest, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. Finally the priest gets annoyed and asks Tony what he's really up to. Tony, feeling guilty, finally confesses to the priest... "My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied." The priest smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Tony's shoulder and says... "You better hurry home now. My wife died a year ago" |
|
|
|
John goes to his friend Tony and says ...
"I'm sleeping with the priest's wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?" The friend doesn't like it but being a friend, he agrees. After mass, he starts talking to the priest, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. Finally the priest gets annoyed and asks Tony what he's really up to. Tony, feeling guilty, finally confesses to the priest... "My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied." The priest smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Tony's shoulder and says... "You better hurry home now. My wife died a year ago" |
|
|
|
What did the rug say to the floor?
I’ve got you covered. Funny Julie |
|
|
|
Confucius says "Man who fights with wife in morning gets no piece at night."
|
|
|
|
Funny Apple Love
![]() What’s a tornado’s favorite game? Twister. |
|
|
|
Little Johnny asked his father to show him the correct procedure for taking a leak.
His father said, step 1 you unzip your fly. Step 2 you pull down your underpants. Step 3 you grab a hold of your penis and pull out. Step 4 you pee. Step 5 you shove your penis back in pants. Little Johnny said thank you and went to his room. A little while later his father walked by his room and looked in and saw Little Johnny masturbating. Having seen his father noticing him masturbating he had to think quick so Little Johnny yelled out 3-5 ,3-5,3-5 just practicing dad! |
|
|
|
Little Johnny asked his father to show him the correct procedure for taking a leak.
His father said, step 1 you unzip your fly. Step 2 you pull down your underpants. Step 3 you grab a hold of your penis and pull out. Step 4 you pee. Step 5 you shove your penis back in pants. Little Johnny said thank you and went to his room. A little while later his father walked by his room and looked in and saw Little Johnny masturbating. Having seen his father noticing him masturbating he had to think quick so Little Johnny yelled out 3-5 ,3-5,3-5 just practicing dad! Rated PG.lol |
|
|
|
What do my dog and my cellphone have in common?
They both have collar I.D. Who is a bee’s favorite singer? Sting. |
|
|
|
What sound does a grape make when an elephant steps on it?
None. It just lets out a little wine. What do you call a sad strawberry shake? A blueberry shake. |
|
|
|
Why did the coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter back. When Sunday and Monday get into a fight, who typically wins? Sunday, because Monday is a week-day. |
|
|
|
This app
|
|
|
|
What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson Rider vacuum cleaners got the dirt bag on the inside
|
|
|
|
Three house pets, a golden retriever, a parakeet and a cat, all die and go to heaven:
As with all the good animals, God decides to have a personal discussion with each one to see where they will stay in heaven. God turns to the golden retriever and says. "The Book of Life indicates that you have been a very good boy. But tell me, in your own words, what are your ultimate principles? What do you believe in?" The golden retriever says. "I believe in loyalty, companionship and love. I have been a cherished part of my owner’s family for many years." God smiles. "Truly, you have a pure and loving heart. You shall sit at my right hand. He then turns to the parakeet. "What do you believe in?" "I believe in color, flamboyance and music." The parakeet says. "For many years I have displayed my beautiful feathers and filled my owner’s house with a song." Your beauty is truly magnificent." God says. "And your song shall echo through the universe. You shall sit at my left." God finally turns to the house cat. "And you, majestic little predator, what do you believe in?" The cat lazily surveys God’s throne and says. "I believe you are sitting in my seat." ![]() |
|
|
|
Do you have showroom for JOKES??, Are you selling Jokes for cash , if so I want to buy some. |
|
|
|
Funny. Not Scamming and Apple Love
![]() |
|
|
|
Funny. Not Scamming and Apple Love ![]() ![]() |
|
|
|
Edited by
JulieABush
on
Wed 01/26/22 12:59 PM
|
|
Thank you Robin
![]() What did the cupcakes say to the icing? I’d be muffin without you. |
|
|
|
How did the farmer fix his torn overalls?
With a cabbage patch. |
|
|
|
What do you call a Russian flea?
A Moscow-ito. How expensive is swimming with sharks? It cost me an arm and a leg. What’s a snake’s strongest subject in school? Hiss-Tory. What did the clean dog say to the insect? Long time, no flea. |
|
|
|
Dito Adel.welcome
|
|
|