to this day, my 24 yr old knows the "mom" look

my kid was spanked and never felt the need to rebel. thank you for confirming he wasn't abused.

besides your kid is 10 months old. get back with us after you've logged some time

so does their misbehaving,,,


not everything is for everybody,, I don't tell non spankers they must spank, but it irritates me when non spankers pass judgment on my choice to spank

Well said, Ms Harmony! I spank my kids too when they were young!

There is a truth to the phrase 'spare the rod and spoil the child'! But some kids are so well behaved, it is all their character and never did need the cane in the first place. So, it depends on how the kid is like.

All children are good, I can't believe this...The saying comes from the Bible, and the Bible thinks everyone was born with sin which is a bunch of bs...no wonder Christians feel it's right to punish kids for being kids...and someone told me I call abuse for breathing this could be true, abuse for breathing is sanctioned by the Bible itself.

like sands through the hourglass so are the days of our lives

Never raised my hand once to my oldest son. He's 23 now and he could tell by the tone of my voice when he had pushed me too far. My other son is still a baby, but I won't raise a hand to him either. I think anyone that raises their hands to their kids is out of order! Just because people like ourselves got scolded and spanked when we were younger, doesn't mean that we have to pass that onto our kids? I didn't like getting hit by a belt when I was younger and I'm sure as hell not going to inflict any of that crap onto my kids!!!

"Open rebuke is better than secret love" "Spare the rod and spoil the child" Failure to rebuke a child who misbehaved openly could be misconstrued by the public to mean the parents of the erring child aint sensitive and responsible.That could amount to negative behaviour reinforcement

exactly.... raise a few first. you can throw that "how to be a good parent" book right out the window.. check back in about 8 years.. after reality really sets in. I would love to hear your opinion on giving a child a spanking then.. if you didn't give the occasional.. deserved spank.., then I would love to hear the opinions of the people who had to stand behind you.. and yours on the check out lines

I would rather see some kids being a little unruly than some parents spanking their kids for being kids in the check out line...you people must hate kids, don't have them then.

Never in my life, have I ever seen a child spanked in public.

Do they do that in Turkey?


The thread topic is about scolding, not spanking.

must hate kids???.. we love them... that's why we had them... and they love us too...

like I said... get some time under your belt first before you tell "veteran parents" about raising kids... it is not a subject someone can really comment on... until they have actually done it.

I have often seen some parents not scolding or spanking their kids in the shopping malls and there they are with their kid throwing tantrums, sitting on the floor screaming they want this or that..... and the parents pleading 'please' 'be good' 'I'll buy you ice cream'....or something to that effect. And I would be thinking....... so degrading for the parent, they should just scold the little brat, and if that doesn't work, spank them..... and if that still doesn't work..... carry them off to the car, rather than that terrible scene and all that wailing and crying at the mall.

I never had this problem with my children when they were kids...... if they become unruly, I just give them the look, scold them, and walk away....and they will follow without fail! The spankings come later at home.......with a warning that they would be spanked there and then at the mall if it ever happened again.

to spank or scold in public?

as I've previously said, the behavior should be addressed immediately.

after last night in a crowded emergency room lobby at a fairly big hospital, I will add for parents that don't stop their children's behavior, those of us impacted by it will be happy to do so.
my nephew was there because he lost his balance on a cartwheel and caused a small gash on his forehead. while m sister was doing all the check in paperwork I was going down the corridor with him as he needed to use the restroom.
the place was packed and some people were letting their kids run in the corridors.
as we were about to turn the corner I could hear little footsteps running toward us. instead of having the other kid collide with my nephew, I put myself between them because I didn't want the impact to cause him further damage since we'd finally been able to control the bleeding.
other kid collided with my leg and I told her please don't run in the hallway. her parent didn't like me telling her kid what to do.
I explained instead of me this child could have run into someone already injured or sick. and directed her toward some empty chairs with her child.

by the same token, while we were sitting in the still crowded lobby, my nephew was starting to get antsy and start fooling around. I leaned over and quietly told him knock it off or I'll spank you right here in front of everyone. he asked (loudly) you won't take me to tge bathroom to spank me.
I said no, if you act silly in front of people you can get spanked in front of people. he said ok, I'll stop and he settled down to quietly play guessing games with me.
a lady next to me said you would spank a child who is already injured? I looked at her obviously broken arm and said would you rather him start acting up and possibly bump into you with the arm your icing down right now? she said well you do have a point.

You are using the word "rebel" in a synonymous way with acting "spoiled" and unruly. Just replace your word "respected" with over indulged. Which leads me to believe that your child did not come with a manual and you could use this link I especially picked out for you.

Parenting
Stop Spoiling Your Kids
Over-indulgence, Dr. Phil explains, is one of the most insidious forms of child abuse.

I don't have a problem with the idea of speaking up to a child in public (they are probably too distracted though and just need to leave) if it works. I'm a direct person. I won't say I will buy you an ice cream or plead with a child, that is not being a parent.

But spanking a child makes them feel awful and guilty is just being a bully. Treat them like the little adults they are, and they will become fine adults one day.

tealbreeze- I read the article and I have no issues like that at all. I don't spoil my child materially or otherwise. If you read the poem I already posted it describes my ideal as a parent.

I wouldn't scold my child I would speak to her seriously, but there is a difference..respect.

Your kid is only 10 months old Estelle. How can you comment about how a toddler, 5, or an 8 year old will behave, when you haven't experienced that level of parenting yet? It ain't easy and they do try your patience at times believe me, but I still wouldn't lift my hand to any kid of mine ever!

That's what I say, it's not easy but there is no good that comes from nagging or hitting a child. If a child is acting up like really a lot, then it's probably something your doing wrong. Maybe you're not spending enough quality time with your child.

Not spending enough quality time with my kid? Estelle, I brought my oldest son up myself for over 16 years after I won custody of him and he turned out just fine, He's 23 now. My youngest is not even 3 months yet and I spend as much time with him as I can manage, considering i'm the main breadwinner and have a company to run also! Not as much time as I'd like to spend with him, but bills have to be paid, as well as my employees wages also!

Not you. I mean for someone who spanks and nags their kid too much, they are not giving their kid quality time.