This is one that those crude
Canadian boys taught me about 40 years ago when I was still a wee little scouse lad but we would say 100 maids
In the ryme. (Alow for inflation)
I lined 1000 maids up against the wall
Bet my prick I could f*_%� 'em all
I f*_%� 997 till my prick turned green I wac_�� off jac*_� off,
F*_%� the other 3
Lordy Lordy I'm a f*_%ing machine.

Sorry Blondey..I couldn't get a link so a just wrote a song aboug it...no I didn't
this song was written by Stommpin' Tom Connors, the recently late Canadian folk legend that sung all about Canada..perhaps the proudest Canadian that ever lived. Wiki has a fair bit if you go through everything and google Camp of a Cannibal. or Martin Hartwell story, can't find any interviews as I seen one 20 yrs after but no movie rights were given. I remember the 14 yrs old boy that saved him would not eat the flesh and lost all hope and as Hartman explains...the boy decided to die that night. He did say in that interview that he wished he died with the boy. When the army rescued him his word were "welcome to a camp of a Cannibal"
The nurse was brit like you. I seen on wiki a clip in the Glasgow Harold.a book was written about here called the snow angle I believe and more funds were raised in her name and went to schooling for nurses.

Lost!... Up in no-mans land of the Northwest Territories
They were lost up in no-mans land The Martin Hartwell Story
The Martin Hartwell Story

On November the 8th of '72 north of the Arctic circle
A plane took off from Cambridge Bay and the pilots name was Hartwell
He had to make it to Yellowknife even though the night was stormin'
To save the lives of an Eskimo boy and a pregnant Eskimo woman
Oh Mr. Hartwell said the nurse I pray that you will guide us
To save this woman with her child and the boy with appendisitis
But the wind it blew and the storm it grew and the signal of controita
They missed by miles and flying wild they crashed beside lake Hota

Lost up in no-mans land of the Northwest Territories
They were lost up in no-mans land The Martin Hartwell Story
The Martin Hartwell Story

Now Judy Hill the federal nurse she never lived to waken
And the life of the mother and her child were soon after taken
But the pilot woke to find himself and the Eskimo boy were livin'
Left in pain beside the plane they searched the skies of heaven
Day by Day the pilot layed with both his ankels broken
And it took the lad everything he had to keep the fire stokin'
While in the sky to far away the rescue team were seekin'
A signal wave that might be traced to Hartwell's radio beacon

Lost up in no-mans land of the Northwest Territories
They were lost up in no-mans land The Martin Hartwell Story
The Martin Hartwell Story

After nineteen days the aireal search was said to be completed
Until someone cried they're still alive and the search must be repeated
And the day the beep was finally heard is a day we'll all remember
A man was found safe and sound on the 9th day of December
Hartwell said he should have died at 35 below zero
And the reason the Hartwell did survive
The Boy had died a hero
He brought me food when I couldn't move while he himself grew feeble

Yes Davey Kutook died a saint and a credit to his people
Davey Kutook died a saint and a credit to his people

Lost up in no-mans land of the Northwest Territories
They were lost up in no-mans land The Martin Hartwell Story
The Martin Hartwell Story

The Martin Hartwell Story.

I tried that and what I discovered was 9 out 10 clearly said they would prefer my male part over the candle..I thought, Im not doing that..ouch! Roasted weenie I just
dont understand woman
Disregard^^^ I misunderstood, I will simply answer...Idn't dat a fact!

What I meant to say was...
*I agree with all that has been said thus far by the woman.
Its because Ive been trained way of PPRM or positive pu$$y reinforcement methods. I will admit to fighting the system for yrs or otherwise known as "stupid" "obtuse" and "a slow learner, (those words still hurt)
ANYWAY! I was a HARD pony to break. It was a unbeknownst calaberative effort with hundreds of trainers involved for me to make the transition*
~BUT what came out was...(my Freudian slip)
Woman are garbage people and use sex as a weapon.
Seriously I do agree with what the woman are saying and have learnt through them.
Yes the ebb and flow thing
and what Leigh is saying and others..its within the woman it depends on how she is feeling day in, day out from the things her man is saying and doing.Woman are wired different, its not automatic like men, its a trigger.Unless she have a medical condition making it extreme or nonexistent
then its probably because its YOUR trigger finger guys

Well that day would definitely have to be of a different time construct. Like one day
Would = 1 year..now that could be achievable for me. Just under 3 per day. How about giving a thousand a day...and first I will need 1000 sexy female volunteers.

Oh goody. .another math problem. .my fav.

I think that's what your saying David,is 1000 orgasams a day at a 75 second duration (thats how long it takes, right ladies..lol) what % of the day would this use up...lol

Ought to be good as it was written by the master himself

Also violates site rules if I'm not mistaken,I believed it has to be your own material.

I remember this story below, I remember Hartwell in an interveiw 20 years latter, 1992.
He was a mess and told the story. He said if given the chance again he would have chosen to die. He just died last year. Don't know what I would do until I'm there. It used to happen a lot at sea in cases were crewmembers with set adrift and not see land for over a hundred
days.I have even read about the living drawing straws as to who was on the menu.



November 8, 1972, Hartwell was given a charter to fly from Cambridge Bay, N.W.T. (now Nunavut) with three passengers who had just arrived from Spence Bay; a pregnant Inuk woman named Neemee Nulliayok, a 14-year-old Inuk boy named David Pisurayak Kootook (who was suffering from appendicitis), and an attending government nurse named Judy Hill.[3] Hartwell was not flying a normal scheduled route, but happened to be in Cambridge Bay after dropping off prospectors on the Barrens. His aircraft, a Gateway Aviation Beechcraft 18,[3] was chartered by the nurse and doctor in Cambridge Bay to fly on to Yellowknife where his passengers could receive medical care at the local hospital.[4]

Some time after taking off from Cambridge Bay in bad weather and low cloud, the plane crashed into a hillside near Hottah Lake, just south of Great Bear Lake. The nurse, Judy Hill was killed on impact. The Inuit woman died several hours later.[3] Hartwell and the young boy survived the crash, although both of Hartwell's ankles, his left knee and his nose were fractured.[3][7] For weeks the two survived the brutally harsh weather where the average temperature was -35F (-37C). Kootook was instrumental in the pair's survival by erecting a tent and making fires. He died after the 20th day whereupon the pilot survived by eating part of the leg of the nurse.

I do a impression of Alive..
N thats what she said

So does this mean Manuel Noriega is innocent. Lol Did you ever see the movie
"To Sevre and Protect" and its trailer as the actors went around with real NY cops.
That movie is as real as real can be..this is nothing new.
I myself was indicted on a class B felony in your good country in the AK and was up on 4-7 years in Arizona as thats where 2+ go from Alaska. I was offered 21/2 years but took it to trial and won by jury after been locked up for four month or what would be considered a 6 month sentence in comparison. What I found out is there is big money in jails?? From the feds I guess as they pay the state up there 200+ per day to house a person. So much money they can farm it out to another state and still make an end with volume. "Everyone" was getting 7-12 year sentances and guys were terrified to fight the crooked system. To top it off 'guys' would get 10 years of probation, some POs would go to there houses at 1:30am to see if they're drinking ect.
75 % were back in for breaches. It pays to know the law though.Reading about the tricks...getting people to empty their pockets, then charge then for pot because its exposed. Reminds me how they settled I domestic dispute as I had the right to remain in the house but she had children so they ask me to talk to them on the porch and as soon as I stepped outside they said I'm under arrest for disturbing the peace.So I freaked out and said I'm not disturbing the peace and they said you are now.lol never again! I won't even talk to them by opening the door.just through the window simply because it's my right.
Last time they were searching me I kept repeating "you have the right to ask me my name and my name ONLY anything else you have to talk to my Lawyer.
They stoped the search and ran my name and that was that..I had nothing to hide, again its my right.

Hence the name Romeo
Such a lady KILLER
..lol
Most of them hate their lifes and want to die anyways...erm..maybe thats just after they meet me, ANYWAY, so that shouldn't scare them off but DON'T ever call then stupid in a chicanery fashion or otherwise like the OP did. As he spoke of his work...lol..jking OP

As weird as you still breathing.. haha

She me

Depends where you live
Haha

I didn't know sowee! probably because people don't say it much to begin with,even in its proper spelling form.
I thought you were making a pig call "sOOIEEEEE" for some reason unknown to me.
So sowee

If one has difficulty with the the cycle of life, such as myself and needs something to believe in then believe in this^^^awesome philosophy written by your fellow Edmontonian, I myself hanging around oil town for a short Christmas break.
More support from AB at this difficult time.I think klc is on to something, she is right.
Al the Best.

Great Boxers make great comics!Timming baby, Timming

Comedy is not prejudice or hold boundaries. ...don't you know that friend
One could be a clean comic such as Bill Cosby or lay it all out, regardless, you can please some of the people some of the time but this comic above knows you can never please all of the people all of the time..so be your spontaneous self.

You realy did it.. *right fist to the sand* YOU MANIAC! YOU BLEW IT UP *left fist to the sand*GOD DAM YOU! GOD DAM YOU ALL TO hEEEEEEEEELLLLL.
I do a pretty good Charlton Heston impression in the breaking waves..
or at least my step kids liked it.