im lonely today just cant seem to be friends with anybody

Hope you feel better soon Coco. I talk to my friends on here when I am feeling down.

The cat is still sneezing, not sure what is going on but I can't afford a vet bill so hope he cures himself. And, I hope the dog doesn't catch it, really don't need that too.

Roy - you have been doing a lot of good work around your house, sounds great.

Karen - I miss hearing from you, hope you are okay.

Jax - I agree, I only clean as I need to anymore, just too tired sometimes. I start a 2nd job again this week for a couple of weeks and will be typing a few hours each night after work, but need the money so will be good, so the housework may be pushed a little farther back until the weekend. Oh well.

I am really enjoying it when I can get into it, Marie. Tried to give the dog away. The lady said for me to bring him before work. Her husband said he didn't want the dog. So the dog sit out in the car all day. When I opened the pet carrier she just flew out. I gave her some water and she just flew up on top of the back of the couch. Looks like we are stuck with each other. I asked the lady at work who sold me the Dodge if she wanted a dog but she thought I said Dodge. Yup. Looks like I am stuck with the van, too. Damn the luck. I haven't put any money lately into the money pit but will have to pay $380.00 payday for the garage to put the new timing belt in plus another oil change because they drained the oil I already put in there a few months back. Of the original $500.00 I bought the van with I will have put twice that much money into the van and it still needs fixing up. Blue, despair and agony on me. Deep dark depression and excessive misery. If it weren't for bad luck I would have no luck at all.

just had to stop in and tell you all that i love you:)

and stay strong. survivors are the most powerful of all.

Hi nyy747. I'm Roy. I couldn't agree more. I hope you feel welcomed.

I have days like that Coco. The job really helps. I just went back to work today from being off two days. I have a lady friend at work who calls me babe and kisses me there but when the shift is over so is the romance. Its the damnedest thing I have ever encountered. Today I decided just not to even try to figure it out any more. I guess if it works don't fix it.

Coco, those days will always happen. the truly important things to remember are 1) you are not alone and 2) it will get better. if we are able to live through our pasts and remain true to ourselves, we are heroes.

and you have a bunch of friends here:)

Awwww, coco. It's ok Hon. You do have friends here. Ive seen them welcome you in the threads. Sometimes it just seems like we have no one. I know that we are all your friends here and my mail box or chat box is always open if you want to vent out a bit. Ok?

Marie, Im going through some chit right now. You know what I'm talking about, but Im hanging in there and being strong as I can. Thanks for caring.

Everyone, take care and hang in there. You guys are all doing a great job of supporting each other.

Nyy, welcome to the thread and thank you for the kind words and wishes.

I think my friend is more burnt out than me. We have been getting these little 8 by 11 certificates for our in services. I have been putting mine in picture frames. But when my friend got her's she said, "Oh, good. More toilet paper." I have been trying to keep her from being so negative because the negativity gets to me. Had a pretty good tonight and it wasn't until after shift that I noticed that it was a full moon.

Hi everybody

it's been a while since i've been here, sorry about that.

I'm not sure what is goin on with me these last couple days. I just feel so, I don't even know what I feel like. I get up every morning, get my son ready for school, put him on the bus and come back in and crawl back into bed and sleep for hours.

I've been seeing someone since June, and things were/are goin good. Recently his hours got cut at work, so now we hardly talk anymore. we used to texted everyday, and he'd call me when he got home from work, which would be around 2 or 3am my time, now he only calls maybe once a week, and barely ever texts me. I email him, but he never responds to them.

A couple days ago, last saturday as a matter of fact, he called me and we talked for an hour..he said that his bed was my bed, and he wanted me to move out there and be his wife. I told him, for me to move out there he'd need a bigger house. (he's only got a one bedroom) and my son needs his own room, plus I have two dogs..and with his dog his house is just to small for two adults, a child, and 3 big dogs.

I've asked him to come up here to my place, in fact he told me that we'd take turns, me out to his, him up to mine, but he's never been here, and I've been out to his place twice. I've gotten him info for the train, bus, and even a rental car. I just don't understand why I have to be the one to do all the traveling, it's not fair!

so on top of all of that, my dad is not doin well at all. couple weeks ago, he went to church for a meeting, and when it was over, he called my mom and said he didnt know how to get home. Mom asked him if there was a gas station around, and he said he'd drive until he found one. Long and short of this is Dad ended up 30 miles west of where he was supposed to be! Mom had to talk him home. Then over that same weekend, Dad said he had talked to me on the phone, but he couldn't understand why I said I was born in '62, when they didnt get married until '64, turns out he was talkin to HIS sister and didn't even know it

UGH!! I guess I just needed to get it out there... sorry for not being around so much, and thanks for listening.

Sorry things are going so rough for you Mommy. Sounds like your friend may be dealing with some depression over his hours being cut at work too, maybe feeling the same way you are and not sure what to do now and maybe avoiding you some as he is just too depressed to know what to do. He may also be afraid now to have you move in with him due to the lack of income and not sure how to handle it. Could be a lot of things going on here, but he needs to tell you, being in the dark is the worst.

Sorry about your dad, sounds like some dementia. It is awful when their memory starts to go. You may need to talk to your mom about him not driving anymore and make sure she drives. He needs to have a doctor checkup for sure, there are meds to help with the memory, they don't help everyone but do help some.

I hope things get better soon, you are a really sweet person and I wish I could do something to help you out. Take care.

I agree, Marie. It is like Mommy is just getting strung along. If you don't have honesty in a relationship then what do you actually have? I was told early on when I came to the forums that friendship is the best way to start any type of relationship. Since Mommy has done as much as she could to keep the relationship going it seems he is not meeting her halfway. She is going to see him but he is not returning the favor. She has made her terms clear here in the post and on her profile. It seems that the relationship is not convenient for him any more. Something has definitely changed but I would say it was before his money problems. It is like he is not owning up to his side of the agreement. He owes her some kind of explanation that is better than what he is giving. It is like he has just left her hanging by not texting back or calling. I know what you are saying about the memory problem I deal with that a lot at work with the residents.

I'm alive.....

Thanks Marie. You are probably right about him being depressed about his hours being cut. I remember him saying he was stressing about it.
I agree, being in the dark is the worst!!


Roy, thanks for your input on this too, I think you've pretty much nailed it right on the head.


I guess I just need to wait it out and see what happens...I'll let ya know

oh, and i'm seeing my councelor tomorrow, so maybe she can shed some light too..

That is always a good thing, Karen. Had a good night. No major stress or drama. We all pretty much got a long. One of the aides bumped into me with one of her boobs and apologized. I really didn't know what to say except thought why apologize. I think it embarrassed her more than it did me. She is pregnant and the boob fairy really blessed her and she just isn't used to it. Gee, now I forgot where I was at. I guess it was the highlight of my night.

Yeah, Ruthie - I think Roy may have hit the nail on the head with your friend. I hope your counselor can give you some good advice. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt but some jerks don't deserve it, you deserve so much better than to be treated that way.

Hey Karen, hope you are doing okay. I have been busy, sorry I don't mean to be ignoring you, took on a second job for a couple of weeks. Drop me a note will ya, I will try to get you one out. I have been thinking about you, but not feeling too swift and trying to get all this done. I am keeping you in my prayers.

Roy - so the boob fairy was good to the aide, huh?? A little distracting isn't it. So much for your cheap thrill for the day , sorry, couldn't resist.

I might have to get an extra job myself, Marie. They have cut down overtime at work. I wonder how long that will last. It seems we have a full crew now on our shifts and sections. I am still getting my 40 per week and as long as everyone shows up regularly that will stay the same. As long as I can make it on the regular hours though I plan to take advantage of it by enjoying my time off.

Well, he called me this morning..good thing too cuz I forgot to set the alarm so I could get my son up for school..lol Anyway...we talked, and he has been depressed, said he doesn't like that I can't be there with him all the time, asked me to consider relocating out his way, job market is better out there than it is here, and he told me he loves me ...that's the first time he's said that since we've been seeing each other. He said he'd pay for the gas in my vehicle and for me to board my dogs, if I would come out there this weekend. I miss him terribly, so yes, I am thinking about goin out there this weekend...

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Sounds like you have made an impression on him and getting to him. It could be that he had to have some time to think over some things. Sounds like it isn't just an one-sided relationship and he making an attempt for you two to be together. I would call it that he is trying to make a compromise. I hope it works out.

thanx.

Hi everyone.the panic attacks are at bay for now and i am doing well with my weight loss though I did cheat today...Hope everyone is having a great weekend and has a great week..love jackie