what a jerk.I would stay put and tell him to step off.

Wow, I have been playing on another site and have met a few nice guys. Now one wants to meet me the middle of next month, panic attack time, geez. Then another IM's me tonight and asks me to be his girlfriend, I have never met him before. Still have the issue with the youngun too wanting a relationship. The guy I have been talking to in Nebraska has been talking about wanting to come out and meet me sometime in the next several months - NOT!!!, talk -yes, meet- NO!! Think I need some Valium, just too weird all of a sudden. Not sure how to handle this stuff. I am too old for this crap.

Is there some strange cosmic thing going on??

Hope everyone is having a good week and has a great weekend. Take care.

(((Karen)))
(((Marie)))
(((Roy)))
(((devil)))


Thank you all for your support thru this! I can't tell you how much it means to me!! You are all beautiful, wonderful people, and i'm glad I know you all!!

I have decided....If I don't feed it, it will die!

no food, no life....no power!

I have really enjoyed taking my days off. There is life outside of work. It is amazing. Sleeping in the bed instead of on the couch has been great, too. I am off tonight and tomorrow night. It is wonderful to look forward to the weekends, again.

Good decision my friend..us good folks don't need to put up with the assholes who try to walk all over us.

what site?I am determined to have a boyfriend this year.

Jax - e-mailed you the site, good luck.

The guy in Oregon is about 5 hours ago, is a definite maybe, who knows. Seems intelligent, a gentleman so far, doesn't seem to be a player but time will tell. He wants to set up a meet, that has me in a panic though. Taking my time with that and he is not pushing. Says he wants the same things I do, long term, etc. Time will tell of course.

Karen - miss talking to you, hope things are great.

Roy - you are doing great, wish I was accomplishing as much with my house. Have to get things going. Making jam when I can, working a 2nd job now through the 9th to make some extra cash. Dad is being a jerk at the home, causing lots of trouble, they took him off his Zoloft for some stupid reason and I am getting calls daily that he is refusing meds, or to do what he is supposed to, etc., like he will do what I ask him to. They restarted it, hope it kicks in fast, dang, living in my car at the beach is sounding better and better all the time.

Have a good weekend. Take care.

I didnt get the e-mail but i would feel the same way about meeting someone..panic.But thats what meds are for and you can't let nerves run the show.Good luck.

writing in a journal helps a lot of people with depression. doesn't help everybody of course but it helps me anyways.

Hi Tony, and welcome. I keep a journal. I don't always keep up with it. Kinda like housework hahaha, and if anyone read it, not only would I have to kill them, I would bet bucks they would be totally confuzzled, lmao.

Yes it can help sometimes, if you can get down what you need to without getting writers cramp first. I believe in the old fashioned way so you can burn it if you need to in a pinch, LOL.

Hey you know they can get that crap from your hard drive even if you delete it. Take it from a girl with a degree in Info Tech and Comp Networking.

But in all seriousness, yes, it can help.

((Mommy))

Wishing you the best of luck, Jax.

Marie, I am having to wait on getting the van left front tie-rod and wheel bearing put in. I sure have sunk the money into the van. I even took the insurance off it till I get it fixed. Driving it home from the shop nearly scared me to death. The mechanic told me all the things still wrong with it and said he could fix the things I wanted to get fixed on it like the fuel gauge, power steering leak and now I learned motor mounts. Talk about a fixer upper once you start it keeps on saying feed me more parts. As far as working is concerned I am just enjoying the time off too much now. Wonderful sci fi marathons.

Hi, Karen.

Welcome to the thread, Tony. Poetry helps me. Haven't written in a diary or journal since creative writing in College or when I kept one in treatment.

Having a great day, today. Just got off im with my good friend. Well getting off now and going to show these cobweb spiders whose house this is. My duster doubles as a magic wand.

yeah i agree to keep ur journal in print otherwise someone could steal it technologically. also this may sound odd, but the best thing for a journal is to make it as unstructured as possible. don't put down what date u wrote it down, or dear journal, or hell don't even put it in a paragraph form. that way u can freely express ur mind on paper and it can really calm u down.

trying real hard not to give in to the thoughts about this whole thing. I truely hate what he did to me, and I HATE that I can't get him outta my head!!! Maybe I should just get really mad and Hate him, then it will all go away!?!?!?!!!


that whole no food, no life, no power over me isnt workin to well tonight

Just got back from a meeting. It was so beautiful. It is always so awesome when they break down in tears. Just 29 days into recovery and she was fighting the drugs dreams so hard. She was crying and asking when do the dreams just go away. When does it get better she asked. Man was she jonesing bad. All we could share was our hope, experience and strength but we gave it to her. Gave her the phone list and we stayed over just for her. Hopefully the new meth baby will be able to wean herself off the meth with our help. I just love the spiritual high I get into helping a new one into the fold.

I suggest printing out a pic of him,nail it to a tree and pummell it with water balloons...

Wow tony your picture lifted my spirits..
I usually try and write poetry.

update...put in a ton of applications for work (almost literally) and no luck so far.....trying hard not to lose hope.

I hope for the best for you, Amber. I used to be rewarded with holes in my shoes for pounding the pavement looking for work. I used to meet a lot of my unemployed friends at the employment office to compare notes on how frustrating it could be.

The last thirty minutes of work made my whole day. One of the aides I work with was talking to her mother who is the nurse on my floor. Tonight this aide was working on another floor under a different nurse. She was complaining to her mother about her having trouble getting along with another aide on the floor she worked on. My nurse, her mother told her not to come *****ing to her but complain to her nurse on her floor. Just a few days ago she telling me how her anal her mother was. Her mother was telling me the reason everybody hates her is because she does her job but then looked over at me and said, "But you love me Roy don't ya?" I said, "You know it." What I am supposed to say she is the boss?

Hey everyone.....just one of those weeks. Can't seem to get it together. One of my best friends has a girl and he doesn't understand why I'm backing off. He can't take me and her to the same party. She is BP too and I called on her the last time she tried to off herself.
She is really pissed even if she tells him she isn't. I dont trust her. Plus, I'm a woman and it wouldn't seem right for him to take both of us.
They are just starting out and even if she doesn't want to go or leaves him hanging, if I go it is just wierd.
We are really good friends but I just have to bow out until they get things settled in. I just didn't want to be the only single person at the party tooHe doesn't understand that and is taking it personal, so here I go again, losing another good friend.
Im cursed to not have anyone close to me in my life. Sighhhhh, he has to understand that even though we made plans that he has to put her 1st. Hell, he wasn't even going to tell her about the party. I made him invite her.
I know we had plans to go to the Labor Day BBQ, but then they decided to make things "perm" and that means he had to ask her and take her. She wanted to go, so I backed off and now he's mad at me cuz I was sick yesterday.
Sh!t, and now he thinks i didn't want to talk to him. Im getting the cold shoulder. I would never get together with this person. He is like a bro to me, but I know he wants more and we have had the "convo", so I thought he understood. I don't know what to do.
Now he says they are just FB, but she wants it to be more. DAMN, Drama Drama Drama! Don't I have enough of that sh!t?

Karen - Sorry things are so bad right now for you Karen. Keep trying to talk to him, he sounds like he is worth salvaging. If he really is not interested in more with her, then he will come around and be your friend again. We all need friends. Who knows where the thing with her will go, but don't give up on him completely.

Amber - keep trying, you will get a bite on a job app. eventually, keep up the good work.

Jax - I re-sent you the website. Good luck.

Roy - Sorry your van is giving you problems, I am in a similar situation, dad's van is breaking down, so I am driving my car. Spending so much money on dad, I am drowning right now. Panicking over how to get propane to get through the winter, but I will have to figure something out.

I have a job interview next Saturday for a weekend job, already work full-time, is in a hospital an hour or more away, so dread the commute and cost of the gas and all, but need the money. Dad is costing me a fortune, plus daughter always needs something, damn, I want to be able to have something for me once in awhile. Oh well, guess I am stuck for now.

Tony - Welcome to the thread.

Hope you all have a great Labor Day and wonderful week. Take care.