Topic:
Judging Others
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I am the only one to judge myself that really matters. Kind of hard to grasp the concept that someonelses opinion should superceed my own. I can't fathom being diminished by someone's opinion. Wise words! For some of us it took a long time to realize that, but once it's internalized...watch out world! AWESOME! I agree..........but I personally think that this comes when you realize that you are truly no better than anyone else. When you judge harshly those around you, an elevate yourself, it is because you feel the need to make yourself "better" by putting others down, is it not? My comments were not based on "snap" judgements. I'm sorry, but it is relevant. VERY relevant. Tribal wars, slavery, hate period, is usually based on the thought that you are somehow "above" another human being................. Yes, it is "natural", for children..........just some never grow beyond their egocentric view of the world. |
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Topic:
Judging Others
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I don't know, I have to disagree with you on some points. Yes, some of the human race have done some horrible things...........but there isn't a one of us who isn't capable of those same acts. Somehow we make ourselves feel better and be able to sleep better at night, by separating "us" from "them". We could NEVER do that............. There are things that people do in life that I couldn't even begin to imagine doing. I could never sell myself to provide for me or my child, I could never injure someone out of rage, I could never abuse drugs....those things are just not in me to do. You can count on that. Do I judge people that do those things? Yes, I do. Because I know that they can do better and make better choices, they just choose not to. Just like the bad things that I have done in my life. Could I have done better? Of course! Did I choose not to? Yes I did. Another point you made: The woman down the street who has five kids by five different men.......who has been flirting with your husband. Does she know the consequences of having unprotected sex? Of course she does. But she chose not to and ended up with 5 kids w/ 5 different fathers. Does she know that flirting with my husband is wrong? Of course she does! But she chooses to disrespect herself and me because she could care less about the consequences. The kid down the street who flips you off just because he can.......... The guy who broke into your house and stole your jewelry.... And this guy knows what he is doing is wrong. And I don't care if his family is starving and living on the street, he has enough insight to know that there is a right way to get money, whether it be by getting governmental assistance, or by getting a job. My point is, I judge people, not because I feel that I am better then them, but because I know that they can do better then the choices they are making at the time. Criticize me if you will, but I make no apologies for being that way. I have been judged for the poor choices I've made in my life, and because of that, I've strive to do better, because I know that I can do better. JMHO I would venture to say that you did not change because others judged you. You changed, because as you said, you felt you could do better. I don't see how if you "don't have it in you" to do something that you think you can say they can do better, when you don't even struggle with it. That in and of itself makes you incapable of judging someone. You mentioned that you "could never injure someone out of rage". Is that to say that you have NEVER hit anyone. NEVER said hateful words because you were angry. NEVER even as much called someone a bad name??? Cuz that is injuring another because of your own anger. You also assume that people CAN do better, or that they think they can. For the most part, they don't think they can. A woman who sleeps around and has lots of children, in search of the "right one".........doesn't think she deserves respect. The fact that you have self esteem...............self efficacy.............well, that makes you unqualified to judge those who do not, nor have they ever. You'd be surprised what being beat on a daily, weekly basis and being told you are stupid, and that you are hated regularly will do to you................ However, I do not judge you for judging others.......nor am I asking or do I expect that you should offer an apology. Such is your life...........I just think you have some gaps in your logic for justifying yourself. Something I never said you needed/had to do. |
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Topic:
Judging Others
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There is a phrase that I strive to live by each and every day... "First seek to understand...then be understood" with that being said, there are many things that I do not understand, no matter how many times I try to...I just have to accept that I will not understand...yet that does not mean that anyone is wrong or right much of the time...just that we have a different view or understanding... every time that "I" get grandiose and think that I am the judge of someone or something...I get a lesson in humility...and rightfully so. Hey beautiful. Very good points. I have noticed myself that anytime I have made judgments of others (especially as a teenager) I've had to live through it, and then understood a little better. Example: I would never let my child act like that......... My child has done almost everything negative that could be thought of............and when it boils down to it, unless I want to physically abuse him, I really can't make him do or not do anything...............the only things I can do is guide, and since he is still small, physical guidance can still be accomplished. Anyhoo, that is what I think is meant when the Bible talks about "Judge not lest ye be judged". It goes on to say that however you judge others, you will be judged yourself. I find however, that when you are "qualified" to judge (meaning you've been there, done that, and are "clean" in that area) that you choose to understand instead.......... |
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Topic:
Judging Others
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^^^
I wasn't referring to the Bible or anything...........even in judging the "spirits" I think it is more so that you know how to relate to them, how to react. I think it is more important to take responsibility for your own choices. Too many times we blame the other person. Especially in "love". Love does not turn to hate, if u go from loving someone to hating them, then you never loved them..............you loved what you thought OF them. It was their failure to hold up to that image.........that made you hate them. Your fault, not theirs. Anyhoo. IMO, most things are not a moral issue, but we seem to make them such. |
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Topic:
Judging Others
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I'll be the judge You sure, it isn't a bikini contest. |
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Topic:
Judging Others
Edited by
Plainome
on
Fri 10/17/08 04:54 PM
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(Not sure if this is the right forum, I hope so)
Ok, so we see these types of threads and news articles all the time. Stories of people who have betrayed this trust or that. People who do not "fit in" our society. I'm generalizing on purpose. Many people just don't seem to understand WHY someone else does what they do...........mainly because they don't think like that person. How is it that we value individualism and freedom, but yet don't even realize what that means?? Don't get me wrong, there are times when measures have to be taken for the physical well being of others................but what people forget is that we are not all the same. Our brains are different. No one quite has a brain like yours. Our lives are different. Even twins raised in the same family with the same "friends" deal with different things on a daily basis. Our DNA is different......................... But yet we expect other to "make sense" to us, and when they don't........there is something "wrong" with the other person. I started this thread because it seems like instead of desiring to understand, the majority of people (no one in particular) prefer to "judge" people. Judging is ok, when it is simply a matter of deduction. This person has a habit of lying to get what they want..... Ok, but when you deem that person as "bad" or yourself somehow "better" because you don't do it, meanwhile ignoring your own "faults". I'd just wanted to see what ya'll thought. Cuz ultimately, I believe that people will do well when they can. Yes, some of the human race have done some horrible things...........but there isn't a one of us who isn't capable of those same acts. Somehow we make ourselves feel better and be able to sleep better at night, by separating "us" from "them". We could NEVER do that............. Have you ever stopped to consider that maybe........just MAYBE, these people are doing what we all do?? Trying to survive. Yes, some of us have better skills for survival. Some of us are better at social interactions, etc. But ultimately that is what we are all trying to do. We are trying to make it through.......in a harsh world that really doesn't give a rip about whether we live or die.........or if we do live, whether we live well. We're all guilty of it, I've been guilty of it, but maybe............we should be a little less critical of judging others. Since you don't know their brain, their life, or the internal struggles another person faces on any given day...............Maybe it would do society good if we just said, yanno, it isn't right, but maybe they were just doing what they thought they needed to in order to survive. In order to be "happy". Yes, we need to keep ourself safe (in matters of physically violent behaviors) and I'm not saying you should just let rapists and murders walk the streets hurting people. BUT Instead of judging them as something lower than yourself.........maybe realize that these people have problems, and YES they are problems that are not ok with you/us............and YES, they must serve the consequences for their actions, but they are still people. And hoping that somewhere along their path, they will find peace?? My post wasn't meant to just be about murderers, etc.........but people in general. The woman down the street who has five kids by five different men.......who has been flirting with your husband. The kid down the street who flips you off just because he can.......... The guy who broke into your house and stole your jewelry.... |
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Topic:
racism
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I don't believe that Obama is playing the race card. He is half white and half black. Which one is he supposed to be playing the card for? Everyone knows that being "white" is not considered to be of any "ethnic" background........... And I didn't point blank say he was playing any card.........but there are people who support him that do so simply because part of him is "black". It matters little to me, I will probably vote for him when elections come, because I like him better than McCain. I honestly don't know which card he supposedly is playing. And I never said that HE was.......so I'm not sure why you keep posting that??? I said, some people play it FOR him..... That bothers me, not he himself...and as I said, that isn't going to effect how I vote, either. I am not arguing with you. I was trying to learn about the race card because I have not seen evidence of it. You had said, "I like Obama, but if race doesn't matter, then why does he play the "race card"? Sorry..........I took it the wrong way. I don't keep track of everything I read or hear.............let me just say it was an impression. Having Jesse James Jr in ur campaign.......probably had an effect. Things like this: (link to youtube) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHzYl8Rg8C0&feature=related I could find more if I wanted to........but I won't, because everything reported has a flip side. I'm simply explaining why I said what I did............It wasn't Obama himself, but his wife in this one. Polling African Americans..and women with Hillary, and wondering why not all African Americans didn't support Obama........is, imo, bringing race into the equation. As if voters should vote for him just because they are black and so is he. P.S. I'm new to politics.........I don't know everything about the candidates.........it was simply an "impression" I had..based on things I've mentioned. ok seeing that you are new to this you get a bit of a break but please aloww me to clear the record Jesse Jackson Jr you mean correct? well if that is the person you mean Jesse Jr. is nothing like Jesse Sr. so if you wish to pass judgment on him do a bit of research. not doing so is how negatives of race are brought on. http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/07/09/jesse.jackson.comment/ As far as the you tube clip you posted Michelle was talking about what i kinda eluded to earlier that black people only vote for black people if they are qualified, the fear in the primary was that he would prove to be unqualified. Therefore black people wernt voting for him in the early goin regardless of race... that kinda goes against your logic doesn't it? when he proved otherwise black people voted for him. Ah, thx for the break.............but my point wasn't that black people were going to vote for him simply because they were black.............my point was that making a point of voters being black or white. Ah nevermind. I must have misunderstood Michelle in that video as well, according to the way I understood it, she was saying that black people WEREN"T voting because they have been oppressed for years, etc. That means, she is saying that if black people were "normal" or "educated" or "not-oppressed" they would then clearly choose Obama???? I am probably wrong, so do please feel free to correct me and show me how/why. |
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Topic:
BLACKS VS WHITES In AMERICA
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Well said Nancy, you always have a way to explain things in a way that i cant. I cannot disagree with any of that. Butt licker Hey now, this isn't the Sex/Dating forum, Andy. Sorry Nancy, I was confused by the flirting going on between Dan and Hajimema****e My bad, |
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Topic:
Honor thy father.
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Thank you all for your replies. I have been reading them all today but keep hesitating how to respond. I wanted to keep the personal info out as much as posible...but it helps to let it out. I can say that your posts have helped. About "don't forget...but don't dwell", I wish I could forget. I didn't dwell on the past, the past found me yesterday. I was so optimistic, of course I'd rather be the optimist and a fool, then a pesimist and right. But my father had cleaned up, found Jesus, yet always stayed pretty absent from my life. (Which was fine with me). I thought my life was moving positively into the future as a grown woman. But yesterday I found myself that same scared little girl. But I can't be scared anymore, I have a son and I'm never ever going to let him hurt either of us. Even though time had passed, the booze was gone, I was staring at the same man with the hateful look in his eyes yesterday. Nothing had changed. So I cursed him out. Publically. Told him to leave us alone and NEVER come into our lives again. I yelled at my father...the man I never raised my voice to. I disowned my father and my conscience is killing me. I hate my father. I hate myself for hating him. I told him the only thing we have in common is our last names. My son and I went to church yesterday, and all I can think today is...I cursed out my dad. I feel like I'm going to hell, I told my dad I hated him and I meant it with every fiber of my being. I'm trying to think of what to say that may help you see, that this is not about your father. It is about you. By your post there is a part of yourself that is still that scared little girl, and it seems it was that little girl that stood up to your father the other day. It is good that "she" not be scared anymore, as you have said. You are no longer that little girl, and I am sure you know that. You have grown, and the fact that these "negative" emotions are not desired by you is a good thing. HOWEVER, do not hate yourself for having them. You MUST allow yourself to grieve for the relationship that could have been......feel the "hate" and embrace it to an extent. For a time. It is important that you allow yourself this, but that it only be for a time. Then I want you to consider your father's background. What was his childhood like?? Why did alcoholism have such a hold on him?? Honey, he probably did/or still does hate himself more than you ever could. It is this hate of self that drives him/did drive him to do the things he did. At least imo. The problem is that you are harboring this same self loathing, because it was handed down to you by your father. Hate, anger, etc. are not part of you, but are simply fleeting emotions. I used to "hate" my grandmother. I think she hated me first. I remember getting hit upside the head with hairbrushes. The difference was I told her how I felt as a child. I called her "crazy" and the like. This probably hurt her..... I hated my "sister" who was/is a liar for the most part. She constantly got on my nerves, and told lies to me. She "hated" me for a long time because people trusted me (simply because I didn't lie to them) and not her...... Hate/anger is usually a "cover" emotion. There is something deeper that you need to deal with and face. I did not truly hate my sister. I was hurt because I felt as though she hated me. Same with my grandmother. Hate is usually a cover for hurt, not always but usually. If this is having a large impact on your life, I would suggest you seek counseling. Though you may love your child, you may be surprised what any kind of self loathing will teach him (or her, but I thought you said him). You must first love yourself, before you can love your father. Imagine part of yourself still being that little girl, and wrapping your arms of love around her. Let her know that everything is alright. Your father is not in control anymore. Though I can understand why, you "hating" him and letting that hate eat you up is allowing the past memory of him to eat away at your self worth. Hate, requires energy. If you feel it, understand it, and release it......it can no longer feed. As I mentioned, in most cases it is a "cover" for something else. Here's a little bit of information, most everyone does whatever they need to survive. Most of us do not struggle for food on a daily basis (in the US) but survival is still a very big motivation behind our actions, whether it be mental/emotional/physical survival. There is more that can be said, but it takes a little feedback, and as I said, if this is more than just a "vent" I suggest you get some kind of counseling. |
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Topic:
BLACKS VS WHITES In AMERICA
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Well said Nancy, you always have a way to explain things in a way that i cant. I cannot disagree with any of that. Butt licker Hey now, this isn't the Sex/Dating forum, Andy. |
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Topic:
BLACKS VS WHITES In AMERICA
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Well said Nancy, you always have a way to explain things in a way that i cant. I cannot disagree with any of that. Thanks, Dan. |
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Topic:
Does God love sinners?
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all together now,, do away with greed,,world wide!!! Funny....thinkin of greed and hows its 1 of the 7 sins....i looked at sloth again... Sloth (Latin, acedia) Main article: Sloth (deadly sin) More than other sins, the definition of sloth has changed considerably since its original inclusion among the seven deadly sins. In fact it was first called the sin of sadness or despair. It had been in the early years of Christianity characterized by what modern writers would now describe as melancholy: apathy, depression, and joylessness — the last being viewed as being a refusal to enjoy the goodness of God and the world he created. Originally, its place was fulfilled by two other aspects, acedia and sadness. The former described a spiritual apathy that affected the faithful by discouraging them from their religious work. Sadness (tristitia in Latin) described a feeling of dissatisfaction or discontent, which caused unhappiness with one's current situation. When Thomas Aquinas selected acedia for his list, he described it as an "uneasiness of the mind", being a progenitor for lesser sins such as restlessness and instability. Dante refined this definition further, describing sloth as being the "failure to love God with all one's heart, all one's mind and all one's soul." He also described it as the middle sin, and as such was the only sin characterised by an absence or insufficiency of love. In his "Purgatorio", the slothful penitents were made to run continuously at top speed. Now, this makes me angry, and lemme explain why... Mental health isnt make believe, its conditions of the brain....YET...god apparently MADE us, so he gave ppl who suffer depression, their brains, no? yet is it a sin to feel depressed? Over time, it goes from sadness and despair (which i might add is in our emotions, which we r not in control of) to "failure to love God with all one's heart, all one's mind and all one's soul." can anyone see how much it has evolved? Doesnt wash with me. Sorry, a lil off topic, but i just wanted to share my thoughts! I did not know this, thx ~L~, I feel the same exact way you do. |
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Topic:
Does God love sinners?
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God's many names EL, ELOAH: God "mighty, strong, prominent" (Genesis 7:1; Isaiah 9:6) – Etymologically, El appears to mean power, as in “I have the power to harm you” (Genesis 31:29). El is associated with other qualities, such as integrity (Numbers 23:19), jealousy (Deuteronomy 5:9), and compassion (Nehemiah 9:31), but the root idea of might remains. ELOHIM: God “Creator, Mighty and Strong” (Genesis 17:7; Jeremiah 31:33) – The plural form of Eloah, which is accommodating of the doctrine of the Trinity. From the Bible’s first sentence, the superlative nature of God’s power is evident as God (Elohim) speaks the world into existence (Genesis 1:1). EL SHADDAI: “God Almighty,” “The Mighty One of Jacob” (Genesis 49:24; Psalm 132:2,5) – Speaks to God’s ultimate power over all. ADONAI: “Lord” (Genesis 15:2; Judges 6:15) – Used in place of YHWH, which was thought by the Jews to be too sacred to be uttered by sinful men. In the Old Testament, YHWH is more often used in God’s dealings with His people, while Adonai is used more when He deals with the Gentiles. YHWH / YAHWEH / JEHOVAH: “LORD” (Deuteronomy 6:4; Daniel 9:14) – Strictly speaking, the only proper name for God. Translated in English Bibles “LORD” (all capitals) to distinguish it from Adonai “Lord.” The revelation of the name is first given to Moses “I Am who I Am” (Exodus 3:14). This name specifies an immediacy, a presence. Yahweh is present, accessible, near to those who call on Him for deliverance (Psalm 107:13), forgiveness (Psalm 25:11) and guidance (Psalm 31:3). YAHWEH-JIREH: "The Lord will Provide" (Genesis 22:14) – The name memorialized by Abraham when God provided the ram to be sacrificed in place of Isaac. YAHWEH-RAPHA: "The Lord Who Heals" (Exodus 15:26) – “I am Jehovah who heals you” both in body and soul. In body, by preserving from diseases, and by curing them when afflicted with them and in soul, by pardoning their iniquities. YAHWEH-NISSI: "The Lord Our Banner" (Exodus 17:15), where banner is understood to be a rallying place. This name commemorates the desert victory over the Amalekites in Exodus 17. YAHWEH-M'KADDESH: "The Lord Who Sanctifies, Makes Holy" (Leviticus 20:8; Ezekiel 37:28) – God makes it clear that He alone, not the law, could cleanse His people and make them holy. YAHWEH-SHALOM: "The Lord Our Peace" (Judges 6:24) – The name given by Gideon to the altar he built after the Angel of the Lord assured him he would not die as he thought he would after seeing Him. YAHWEH-ELOHIM: "LORD God" (Genesis 2:4; Psalm 59:5) – Combination of God’s unique name YHWH and the generic “Lord,” signifying that He is the Lord of Lords. YAHWEH-TSIDKENU: "The Lord Our Righteousness” (Jeremiah 33:16) – As with YHWH-M’Kaddesh, it is God alone who provides righteousness to man, ultimately in the person of His Son, Jesus Christ, who became sin for us “that we might become the Righteousness of God in Him” (2 Corinthians 5:21). YAHWEH-ROHI: "The Lord Our Shepherd" (Psalm 23:1) – After David pondered his relationship as a shepherd to his sheep, he realized that was exactly the relationship God had with him, and so he declares “Yahweh-Rohi is my Shepherd. I shall not want” (Psalm 23:1). YAHWEH-SHAMMAH: "The Lord is There” (Ezekiel 48:35) – The name ascribed to Jerusalem and the Temple there, indicating that the once departed glory of the Lord (Ezekiel 8—11) had returned (Ezekiel 44:1-4). YAHWEH-SABAOTH: "The Lord of Hosts" (Isaiah 1:24; Psalm 46:7) – “Hosts” means hordes, both of angels and of men. He is Lord of the host of heaven, and of the inhabitants of the earth, of Jews and Gentiles, of rich and poor, master and slave. The name is expressive of the majesty, power, and authority of God and shows that he is able to accomplish what he determines to do. EL ELYON: “Most High" (Deuteronomy 26:19) – Derived from the Hebrew root for “go up” or “ascend,” so the implication is of that which is the very highest. El Elyon denotes exaltation and speaks of absolute right to lordship. EL ROI: "God of Seeing" (Genesis 16:13) – The name ascribed to God by Hagar, alone and desperate in the wilderness after being driven out by Sarah (Genesis 16:1-14), when she met the Angel of the Lord and realized she had seen God Himself in a theophany. She realized that El Roi saw her in her distress and testified that He is a God who lives and sees all. EL-OLAM: "Everlasting God" (Psalm 90:1-3) – God’s nature is without beginning or end, free from all constraints of time and contains within Himself the very cause of time itself. “From everlasting to everlasting, You are God.” EL-GIBHOR: “Mighty God” (Isaiah 9:6) – The name describing the Messiah, Christ Jesus, in this prophetic portion of Isaiah. As a powerful and mighty warrior, the Messiah, the Mighty God, will accomplish the destruction of God’s enemies and rule with a rod of iron (Revelation 19:15). But guess what folks.....All the same God.....want Jesus' many names also.... You people crack me up. I noticed you only quoted the "Jewish" names for "God". So, if they have so many names for him, why is it that other cultures and other peoples names for him are wrong and their's right?? Why are their "stories" fact while others' are simply "myth"? |
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Topic:
BLACKS VS WHITES In AMERICA
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To add to my post.......it isn't your "race" that causes the differences, but rather adaptation. Depending on where you have lived and the environment both physical and social........it has little to do with your ancestry.
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Topic:
BLACKS VS WHITES In AMERICA
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Sorry about the title - just wanted to grab your attention. I just wanted to open up this dialogue because I like to get my information from the 'horse's mouth' so to speak. I just want you guys to give any opinion you want on race and racism. Does it exist? Does it no longer exist? Was it ever or is it still justified? Do you believe that Blacks makes a bunch of excuses to draw attention away from their own apathy and laziness? Do you believe that Whites hide in suburbia and refuse to admit that racism exists today, even though every other person they know or are related to is racist? I am just throwing topics out there to stimulate your mind.....these are very relevant issues to thousands of people in America to this very day. I encourage all to express their opinion. It doesn't matter in this forum if you are racist, bigoted, Black, White, Male, Female, whatever...ALL can speak without recrimination from myself at least. I do want to ask that you follow my ONLY rule: Please be respectful. If someone says something you don't like....do not get personal, or nasty... or get in your feelings. It is my belief that the only reason racism exists is because we let personal feelings get in the way of objective reasoning and logic. With that.....let's chat! Let me see, "race" does not truly exist imEDUCATEDo. The things that we use to separate races are the same things that vary within any given race. skin color/shade, build, face shape, hair color/texture, etc. A person with "black/brown" skin may not be of African descent, and if you study anthropology we ALL came from Africa. How many Asian people get frustrated because people call them Chinese when they are Phillipino?? Is "racism" a problem? Though I think the division of "race" doesn't exist racism does indeed exist in the minds of people. However, so does homophobia, people who don't like children, people who don't like men/women, people who don't like rich people, or poor people. Unfortunately we tend to focus on how we are "different" than how we are alike. I personally thing that it is more with "class" than "race". I've heard arguments about "black" people not having economic freedom. I grew up in neighborhoods that were largely populated with black people.........and I am white. I was bussed from a "poor" neighborhood into a neighborhood that had inground pools in the backyard...........along with the "black" kids. (integration, stupid) Racism is attributing certain characteristics to a person simply because of his "race"............I don't see this happening. I find it has more to do with their culture. I find myself responding similarly to people who are of the "gang" culture, no matter their "race". If you are wearing the overly baggy jeans, jersey, bandana (of same colors) on your head, and using language that speaks of the "ghetto" I am likely to be intimidated by you. Why? Because I don't like gang life. I don't like being around someone who may pull a gun at any moment. I've posted at length on racism in another thread...... Yes, people are "racist" but "race" is not the problem. Affirmative Action, and "Black Pride" only add to it. Instead of equality, it is "despite our race, we are...........". To me that is an insult to yourself. Despite being human I can.......... Self hate anyone?? We are all integrating anyway. Eventually the majority will be of "mixed race". We all have common ancestors. It has only been the desire to dominate that causes people to look for differences and then elevate their differences above those who differ. It's all economical. Hate is hate. Anytime someone uses a crutch to excuse their own behavior.........they are only hurting themselves. I was very saddened when I read about the Jenna Six situation.........when I read ALL the facts surrounding it. And to think that these kids have a fund, because their criminal acts were justified because of "racism". |
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Topic:
Honor thy father.
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Look at it this way: You're not honoring the PERSON so much as your connection to that person. You can be realistic about your parents and know that there's no way you can ever be around them. Maybe your parents are criminals, or they abused you, or they are drunks, or whatever. There's no reason you should forget that bad things happened to you because of them, or give them more opportunities to do bad things to you. But you should at least make an effort not to hate them. Try to see them as screwed-up human beings that deserve compassion. Honoring your parents means honoring the fact that they brought you into the world to have an opportunity at life. You don't have to be a pushover for them or let them abuse you, or let them get away with abusing anyone else. Forgive your dad, if there's any way you can. Don't do it for him--do it for yourself. Whether your dad is a good person or a bad person, you will always during this life have a connection to him. I know people my age who still carry around grudges against their parents, and I always pity them. I hope this was helpful. yours in Chaos, Scarlett (did that come from you?? ) I agree. Forgiveness is not forgetting, but rather accepting the past as the past, realizing that no amount of "wishing" will make it any different than it was, but also letting go and looking for today. It has helped me to forgive people by understanding that they may have been doing the best they could with what they knew how. Parents are not perfect, and they make huge mistakes, some are selfish and honestly should have never become parents.........but such is life. As an adult we are responsible for ourself, our own minds, hearts, and spirits........and bodies for that matter. I think you could learn to respect them as humans, in the least, screwed up, but still human. Who knows, if you had lived their lives you may have ended up the same way......just a thought. |
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Topic:
Does God love sinners?
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Well, I would consider someone believing "Confucius" is a god the same as "Jehovah" or "Jesus" or any other "god" that is lacking in scientific evidence. The only thing is he himself NEVER claimed to be anything but a man, at least to my knowledge. We are ALL Gods and Goddesses... |
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Topic:
Does God love sinners?
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Well, I would consider someone believing "Confucius" is a god the same as "Jehovah" or "Jesus" or any other "god" that is lacking in scientific evidence. The only thing is he himself NEVER claimed to be anything but a man, at least to my knowledge.
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It was meant to be "don't trust someone with SOMETHING" not "someone", lol. and too late for an edit.
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People who make a huge point out of "trust", "getting to know someone first", "friendship", etc., on the internet are usually (not always, but USUALLY) trying to scam. The internet is not a great place to build trust. It IS great place to make friends and socialize. You should never consider someone a true friend, or trust that person, until you have met him or her face to face. I have internet friends I've known for years; I get along great with them and have talked on the phone with them, etc. However, I don't trust them 100%; that would I feel be stupid. You can have a lot of affection for another person, but trust does not necessarily have to go along with that. Every time a person I've met on the internet asks me for trust, or seems to expect it, even if I've talked with him/her on the phone numerous times, I will start to suspect that something's up. Just my opinion(s), of course! yours in Chaos, Scarlett I agree for the most part. No one should demand trust form another, it doesn't even work that way. I do not trust anyone 100% even if we have known eachother in person for 20 years. Trust has levels, imo. I feel that I can trust my online friends for certain things, but I base that trust on their character.......and past behaviors. I do not believe trust CAN NOT be built online, or that knowing someone in person means they can't/won't do something to betray your trust. Take responsiblity for those you trust, instead of blaming them for when things go awry. Don't trust someone with someone you can take care of yourself........because if they fall through you are the only one to blame. Don't expect someone to be worthy of your trust, either. |
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