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Community > Posts By > JustaSimpleMan56
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Topic:
looking
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Pull down pants and make THEM laugh first. 
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Topic:
Re-gifting
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Used to re send a Christmas card back and forth between my ex and I. But stopped. The way the postal service raises the cost of stamps each year. Cost more to send the card, than what it cost. Cheaper just to buy a new one.
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wow.............  simply............WOW!!!!! |
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A window ( To let the sunshine in)
A door ( That I may come and go as I wish) Kleenex ( Hate when I have to wipe runny nose on my sleeve) Music ( Great for a pick me up when I'm feeling blue) Water ( So I can take that once a week bath to take the funk away) Electric lighting ( Since I live in city now, cant go out to catch fireflies to keep in a jar) My dog Duke ( Great for cleaning plates when water heater goes on the blink) My feather duster ( One of the best sex toys ever invented) My frying pan ( Was getting to be too hard for me to hold the hot can of pork and beans) The picture of the air conditioner on my wall( Works great with that fan sitting in front of it) My micro wave ( Best sock dryer I ever had) |
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I really,really, really,really, want a patch repair kit for my blow up doll.
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OOOOHHHHHH how I LOVE eating a nice, juicy........fur burger. YUMMY
  No better taste in the world
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Topic:
Receiving Gifts
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So by the same token, do you not ever GIVE gifts either then? No, I don't give gifts; I give to charities instead. Correct me if I am reading this wrong, but isn't giving to a charity a gift? Isnt that a double standard that you give and yet won't let someone give to you? Be it money or your time. How would you feel if your favorite charity sent back your check/money or declined to allow you give of your time? Would you feel insulted that millions of other people can give to the charity and you can not? Personally I do not give gifts to buy anyones love or loyalty. A gift to me is a simple gesture that I thought of them when I saw the item. You may not have a need or want of that item, fine. Kindly tell the person that all gifts from now on will be donated to a local homeless shelter. On the other hand, did you ever think that the gift giver was also insulted by the refusal of the gift? Because to him it was not a token or replacement of love but a simple jesture to show he was thinking of you and is glad you are in his life. A thank you for allowing him to be with you and spend time with you. When I give to charities; its so people can live. They need food, clothing, and shelter. I have all that so I don't want or need a gift. As I previously said, a gift to me is he accepted me in his life; that he loves me unconditionally; not something he bought at a store; and I don't need a gift gesture. If a person truly loved me, cared for me, or was really thinking of me; he would respect my wishes and not buy me a gift. I feel equally insulted if I am given a gift so it goes both ways. Anyways the point is moot. He gave me an ulitmation that either I accept his gift or he would end the relationship; so I said goodbye and wished him well. I won't be bullied into accepting gifts. |
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Topic:
jokes
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Topic:
Lets just say....
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 ...that I have a couple of big reasons.   She can queen me any day
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The use of a strapon
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Topic:
MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY
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My blow up doll doesn't have money,or a job. She was homeless when I met her. She was sleeping in a dumpster. Felt so bad for her. Some mean person stabbed her. I took her home with me, and patched her back to health. We have been living together ever since.
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Topic:
first time
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The slap in the face after I pulled her pig tail, and saying toot, toot. I really had a crush on her. And even more after she slapped me.
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Topic:
Phobias
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I'm always scared that my blow up doll will get a hole when I'm out of patches
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Topic:
One man's trash....
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I love swap meets and yard sales.Oh. And dumpster diving. Best place to dumpster dive is either at the middle class apartment complexes, or apartment complexes that are around collage campuses when school is out for the year. JACKPOT!!!!!!!!
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Cool. He has been floating in the bowl for the past week. Well. Frying pan he will go
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Wonder if its legal to eat your goldfish once he dies.
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Topic:
Love question
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I was incredibly young when Kung Fu was cancelled. Did it break your heart that Bruce Lee didn't get the part? Did you hold it against David Carradine for stepping in for Bruce? Long live Kwai Chang Caine.  |
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Topic:
Yes or No
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Absolutely why not?? They have feelings,wants and needs.   
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Topic:
High cost
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The other day I picked up a woman to take her on a date. When she got in the car, and her seat belt was fastened. I asked her where she wanted to go. She replied " Oh! Some where expensive " So. I drove her to the nearest gas station, and dropped her off.
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Topic:
Too old?
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One day a little girl was visiting her grandparents. And, out of curiosity, the child asked her grandfather.
( Granddaughter ) Grandpa. Since you and grandma are so old, do you still have sex? ( Grandfather) Why, yes we do. We have oral sex. ( Granddaughter) Oral Sex? ( Grandfather) Yes. Your Grandma and I sit in our rocking chairs and say, f**k you, f**k you to each other |
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