A small Boy wrote to Santa Claus," send me a brother"
Santa wrote back," SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"


A married couple went to the hospital to have their first baby. While there, a new doctor told them he’d invented a machine which could transfer the mother’s labor pains to the father. The husband thought this was a terrific idea. (Talk about dumb!)
The doctor set the machine at ten percent, explaining that even ten percent was too much for most men. But the husband felt just fine. So, the doctor turned it up to twenty per cent. Still nothing. Amazed and with some trepidation, the doctor turned the machine up a notch, to fifty percent. But the husband continued to feel just fine. Wanting to help his wife, however, who was writhing in pain, he told the doctor to transfer all the pain to him.
In the end, the wife delivered a healthy baby, and the husband suffered no pain at all.
When they arrived home the next day, they found the mailman dead on the front porch.



A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor’s office and said that her
body hurt wherever she touched it.

‘Impossible!’ says the doctor. ‘Show me.’

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed,
then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee
and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she
touched made her scream.

The doctor said, ‘You’re not really a redhead, are you?

‘Well, no’ she said, ‘I’m actually a blonde.’

‘I thought so,’ the doctor said. ‘Your finger is broken.’