This is my final post!

Sorry, for all this ka'oss but to help a person sometimes you do what ever you can and.

I thank you all for your opinions and they have been great ones.

sometimes we need to look at life from different eyes.

Lets delete this post! and call it quits..

thanks, My time is up and another year of work work work is all my life is about. God bless you all!

Iam4u thanks, you have been the biggest help through all of this and I really needed your in put on all of this. YOUR a wonderful man and a good friend to all, your judgment is wonderful! never bios never society thinking just the right amount!

YOU have a wonderful life and I wish you and your family all in Good health...

P.s. i got that call! no joking he said he was sorry and asked her for a second chance.. I am telling you.. Kids! Thanks for all the help

Sorry! I had to come back for there is a very important message about what I have left YOU ALL WITH!

Yes! I did tell her that he loved her that is right. He dose love her!

OK! LETS FRAZE THIS... HE DATED HER FOR 2 YRS! BUT THE BABY IS ONLY 1YRS OLD//

Did anyone miss this??????

So they were in love for one year! UNTIL she got pregnant RIGHT! Then he realized all the hot passion was over and the fun... was not going to come... any longer... he felt Trapped, He felt that she did it purposely to ENTRAP HIM! Let’s think how a man thinks first...

Here is a young hot sexy young 21yr old girl no rules, no ties just wants to have hot sex! Everywhere, and every way. He has it made!

Now! A year goes buy telling this lovely girl, I will never marry you! I don’t ever want to get married, I never want kids?

Did no one see that in all of this... 1 yr prior... to this baby!

The father did not want a child! He was however a year later FORCED INTO FATHER HOOD! With out his consent!

You? “Also women” for got something! [I love him]! She new! But allowed herself to fall in love with a man who did not want to ever get married or ever have kids.......??????

Women? Think about this, we fall head over heals right after we have sex! Are hearts and souls are thrown out the door and are minds telling a different story... I love him. I love him, I need him, he is my world, and I want him to be the father of MY CHILD. If I get pregnant he will MARRY ME, HE WILL "LOVE ME"!

Dose the man love her YES he did, Has he fell in love with his BABY! 'Yes' he has..... very much or he would not have given the women money to go buy her self college items for school, or the baby.... down in his heart 'yes' could be guilt!

Or is it that a man told a young girl I don’t want to have kids and I never want to marry you...

So then the question is this?

1. Is it the man who new he would never fall in love and never get married and never wanted to have children, he just wanted to sleep around from young girls to women for the rest of his life.

Is it his fault for starting a relationship with a young girl at 21 and her getting pregnant????

2. Is it the young girls who new he would never fall in love and never marry her? Then she should have never had 'SEX WITH HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE’?

Now! We can never see the out come of are decisions we make! We can never stop are life and hope it will restart, it will not! we only get one chance... to 'LIVE OR DIE'... for some there is a middle ground that God gave a 2nd or 3rd chance to....

But for most of us let’s take time to think about this?????

This young girl is told by her mother to stay with this man because she got herself pregnant and to make 'MAKE HIM MARRY HER'... don’t get a abortion, keep it no matter what, so she stays on Welfare while he is in another women’s bed, who is on the weekends “taking care of her child know”!

YOU! can argue this until your blue in the face... But WOMEN ARE NOT FOR SEX... WE ARE NOT TO HAVE “BABYS” JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE A 'Wing Wang'...

If we are raised to be ladies, with high respect for ourselves, if we are raised to be gentleman, with high respect for ourselves, then don’t you think that today!

Let’s say, “YOU” took a chance and asked a stranger to marry you! Would you make it last for the rest of your life, or did you do it just to get sex?

Women! why have sex on the first day, or second why do you think that you can fork it out, when 80% of all these women are trying to get a good man and you are giving it up for free and sleeping with all of these men. Then you have taught them one thing and only one thing... to cheat on there wife’s!

Men! why have sex on the first day, or second, why do you think that you can fork it out, when 80% of all these women are trying to get a good man and you are giving it up for Free and sleeping with just anyone! Then you have taught them one thing that you DONT LOVE THEM! And you showed your sons that women are for sex not love!

I have spoken to the nicest men ever! And they all said one thing; I want a LADY TO NOT CHEAT! To hold me, to love me (sex), to be there for me!

That is what this young man was doing he was being there for this girl who PUSHED HIM AWAY AND FORCED HIM TO HAVE A CHILD WITH HER TO KEEP HIM FOR EVER AND EVER AND EVER MORE!... I have known her for 7 yrs and she goes through men like you go through toasters one every 1 or 2 yrs, and it is always the same thing,, She wanted every month to get pregnant, every month she called me for 5 yrs, I think I am pregnant, I think I am pregnant.. She just wanted a child... and not the man... and when that happened... NOW>>>> SHE EXPECTS THE MAN TO LOVE HER, TO BE THEIR FOR HER AND TO RAISE HER AND HIS CHILD!

Please note it is not the Mans fault.... It is the women’s however because the women can say... yes or no... I am not talking about rape. I am talking about, “Free giving sex” that Society is teaching are children at a early age... at 11yrs old, or 14teen, 16 or 18! Women are forking out sex to anyone she meets, to multiply partners for 3s and 4s.... she is being the Harlem in the bible one can say and all the men in the bars are drinking and smoking and having there way with the same women....

And YET>>>>> MEN, “Want A Lady”! With Class and Poise, with Respect and Manners with the Hot Sexy Momma in the bedroom at night!

We want more then what we will accept, we expect more then what we can give. We take the chance and drive from state to state to have a night of sex to only then return home? Telling the other person [I am sorry this just will not work]...

However!... if we would have gotten to know each other day after month after year. Then you would still be together in a long and loving relationship like all the married couples that each and every one of you is ASKING TO BE IN!!!!

Some are waiting for years for there love, but she never comes, others find them over night and it lasts for 20 or 30yrs.

If we would pick “one person tonight” and say! “Lets just make it work”; no matter what happens don't you think tomorrow how happy you would be...

Don’t pick the wrong one... BECAUSE THERE IS NO WRONG ONE...

Let’s say everyone on here IS THE WRONG ONE... Then who??? Is the Wright one????

I want the beautiful one, that stops my heart, and so did 7 more men and even 27 women, “Personality is the key”, not looks and money!

I want the handsome man, the one that stops my heart, and so did 3 women but he chose none of them! for he could not decide and did not believe any of them would accept him for who he is! This was true! do you know why?.... He was not built to the qualifications that women described so she lost out on a great man! The other two found faults, he did not have that great job so she lost out on a great man, the third one said “I am sorry” because you have kids, I do not want to be the mother of your kids, so the Man walked away with out a Date but an Ego that was diminished...

All because his wife had died and leaving him with bills to pay, a child, and God gave him a small package.

I know this is hurts but Please understand, this is what I have seen from you all!

As for the women who had 3 lovely kids the man did not want to commit, she only had one to choose from and he did get one thing from her... that was???? Can you gess?.... yep... SHE FORKED OUT THE SEX......

So is it the man????? I will say no, NO! It is the women, who make the final decision! If she is going to sleep with the man, or marry him tomorrow.

When we base sex before we will marry him! To see if the sex will satisfy them then we as a human only can feel lust in are toes.

This will not make a life time relationship NOW WILL IT??????

I got a call from that girl just a little while ago, she said, I think I am going to ask him if he wants to go to marriage counseling?

Remember! On thing... He dose not want to get married!

Women or Man!

I love you all for who you are but dang Think hard on this...

There is no differents then all you men and women who are playing cat and chase!

YOU wanted women for the rest of your life,
YOU wanted a man for the rest of your life,

Then make it come true... Amen.

‘O' to -one person-, who made great since!

I was born a baby
Became a Women
Chose to be a Wife
Learned to be a Mother,
Was taught to be a Teacher
Prayed to be a Grandmother.
Wanted to be a Pastor
One day I will be Great!

This is my skills!

Raise are baby boys to be sons,
Raise are Sons to be Men,
Raise are Men, to be Husbands,
It’s the Wife's job to LOVE HIM!
It’s the Wife's job to show him how to be a father
It’s the kid’s job to let him be a Grandfather
And some day with the love of his Mother and Wife
This MAN WILL BE A GREAT MAN!

1. your going back to school so you will not be there 9 hrs of the day and 2 more hours are for doing homework

so you leave at 8am and come home at 7pm.. That only leaves you to grab a quick snack of vegetable and fruits and head off to bed with a kiss on your mom's head saying.. I love you thanks and good night..

2. Make sure you take a nutrition class at college and even use the gym time and swimming pool... if you really want to change then only you can do it regardless if your in her home or not...
it is only you..

3. if you show your mother your COURAGE, STRENGTH AND WILL POWER... Don't you think she will see them and maybe just maybe take the courage to just put the effort into cutting down on her indulging.

and when you cook meals on the weekend don't let her do it, you cook healthy meals..

Don't waist your time....... failing... make it worth your time Succeeding?

God bless you..

I spoke to a young 22yr old girl last night for 3 hrs on the phone, I do counseling, and she has a 1yr old daughter, She said, My boyfriend wrote me a piece of paper to say he has been cheating on me and yet we have been together for 2 yrs {but he dose not believe in marriage so he would not marry me when we had are daughter he told me to get rid of her or to keep her but he would not marry her}, he called to ask me if I have received it and she said NO... so he told her on the phone he has been with another women for over 6 months and that he is leaving her and he wants his child on the weekends..

Last night because of "no tax" in this state he came and dropped off money so she could buy a few things for her and the baby.

The young girl said, I love him but I don’t believe he loves me?

I said but he came and thought of you and the baby he did not have to do this, she said but I know he dose not love me, I said because of that is why he found a new women, you don’t believe he loves you.. But you love him... so that means this...

YOU want man to hate you so he can love someone else because you don’t believe you can be loved so you pushed him away.

She said, No! I love him I said your right, but you never allowed him to love you and you would not believe he loved you and you would not accept him to love you so you ... showed him that you don’t believe you can ever be loved by him..

If he can not feel that you love him and he is hurting you emotionally then he should not be with you for he loves you so much he has to leave so he dose not do this anymore...

This is how so many women on this site feel it is also how so many men portray women...

I want to love you but I can not because I know you will never accept or love me.

With this kind of thinking... NO one can love anyone.

ONLY a few a few, has enough courage to ask a women out and take a chance and say I will give it a try.

And if women would stand up and say, this is the man, I think you could be good for me.

His integrity was there and he new he could not live it... That was very true but what it showed was this...

We marry women, we have kids with women, and then were dose it all goes wrong, it is women want and want more and more, they want what they want.

If the man believes he can not afford her or the lifestyle she lives... then he stops trying, he walks away leaving the children needs.

ONLY a few men want the best for women, only a few that are hard to fine because they are married.

Did you know in the bible it says: Fear God, and if God is in the image of mankind, then think what man understands.. A father should be feared to be respected by his family and children? crazy but that was the 50's thinking...

Kids wait until your father gets home? and one by one they stood in line confessing there sins of the day, as daddy sits in a chair and bend the kids over his knees. with a shaving belt or a paddle some even just used there hands...

The child got spanked and could not let out a peep! or they got another one!

in that day and age the women though that Man was the ruler of the house and it was his job to show the kids that mother was the boss.

However, who was hated! the mother ? or fathers ?.. neither of them for they both were "=" why because one gave cookies and the other gave money! The end.

YOU have a angry sister who's needs were not met in child rearing years she is angry her mother is ill and knows she can take advantage of her and as you can see there is nothing you can do because she knows you wont do it!

She has no limits, no empathy, no guilt or fear! She is free to do what ever she pleases and that is the truth.

how to solve:

1. tell your mother to cry every times your sister hits her just buckle down and keep saying, I'm sorry I'm not the mother i should have been.. Teach this child Empathy, let her see the pain in this womens face.
2. To arrest her will only make her more violent in the end it is not a way too go..

Take your sister in your arms and hold her tight, tell her how much you love her, she is so hurting inside, she is so angry at you and your mother and life and in her self. don't turn her away for that will make her stray.... she needs love not the Police to take her away.

it will not be easy and it will not happen over night but tell mom to just stick in there and cry.. and scream and tell her how sorry she is.. again teach that child empathy..

take her too grave yards, and convalescent homes to volunteer her time, if she plays a instrument or sings then set it up they always love company.

Let her visit the sick and poor in a food bank or food kitchen, teach her to be human and to have concern for more then herself in life.

I hope this helps, there is no simple easy lesson the child is too old to learn but give her a heart and she will develop a soul and that is all you can do.

hope it helps

2:00 in the morning...? What a long night! I said good buy to all my friends here because my time is up.

My confession is this: Summer is over, College will be back in a week, I have to get the house ready so i can work 18hrs a day 7 days a week helping these kids get a degree.

My son is home and not a drop he is as nice as can be< i guess my assumptions were all wrong after all.. thank God! he stopped drinking over 5 months ago.. how sweet! He did get a second job and is going to let Mother Dearest Handle his finances so he can get out of 25k in debt!

It has been so much fun flooding all your forms and the topics have been a blast to make me laugh and grin... I thank you so much!

For the friends i have make Thanks Babe! YOUR just a great person I can say.... for the rest to have way too much fun, Keep us laughing we need a good one.

For one person who they know who they are, you have my email, Don't be a stranger...you might as well have a great laugh also.

Even a Pastor Has to have some fun and that I did here.

I did not come here for any other reason then to make a friend, and for the others... Keep it real for some of you really have crushes on others.. don't be afraid take it with a grain of salt and go take a dive, for you never know until you try the worst that can happen is you get sand in your panties... or trunks stuck to your rear...

for one of you who cracked me up more then any of you Keep that Doll tucked in at night.

But to one of you who was so intelligent that just fascinated my mind, I will read the books and listen to the audio tapes and I will be back after i have learned all this stuff to share my thoughts on QM... fascinating... it was....

and last of least To some one sweet Life is so simple don't sweat the hard things only remember you can do it and make your life easy quit fretting abut all the simple things its a waist of energy.

for all my long long letters i had to leave you with this... My longest page letter was 57pages... Thank God! you did not know me as a teenager.. YOU would have never gotten in a word..

The rich an famous was my past and now i am just me, free from the crazed way and to learn a new trad... get out of childcare.. it will make you crazed.... lol...

Thanks everyone....Good night!

P.s. I was not Gay! it was suppose to keep you men out of my hair but it did not work you came anyway and for all that i turned away! Hay.. why were you there in the first place?????????????? I just wanted some time away from work and to play, play, play! I wanted to play..........so be gay and happy and cheerful and proud today is my last day!.. Be a clown with a upside down frown...

Amen Pastor Julie

P.s. Gossip was fun and narrow minded killed the fun! Gee Get a grip treat everyone the same and never ever talk behind there backs.. they can hear you......... DAAAAA

I hope you have a great night, I will leave you with this...

STOP SMOKING!

but it is your choice...

O and Sunday is my last day! i have to get ready for College classes, it has been so much fun on this site, thanks for everyone helping me get through the last of summer days.... it really was so sweet..

I have jacked up all your threads... and told all my storys... well some of them.. never the juicy ones..

So you all can have a blast and not have long long long letters of mine..

Thanks everyone.... its been real!

OO and i really hope you do stop smoking.... if not for anyone I hope you do it for yourself... Pastor Julie

Thanks for the laugh... going to take a hot hot bubble bath... Later!

OOO this is why I stay single.... how funny........ at least it passed my night away.. thanks everyone..

OK SINCE YOU ALL ARE SO YOUNG!... for the word Vagina.. lets use

Hoochi coochi and wing wang... dose that help.....

Dang it said 3 things..

1. carpenter
2. mechanic
3. plumber

all combined, who wear's woman's underwear and dress up in the bedroom!

The perfect man, o make sure you have boobies....Gee!

Everyone on here deserves to be happy... They come here because they hope to find someone, sometimes they come because they just need a few moments away from there life. but to really have found someone that will compleat you that is just so exciting and wonderful...

again.. I hope this rest of this year that each and everyone that wants to find love will have the chance to do this! Maybe you are the start of a long list of others that will take a chance....

so many men and women are so dang shy and they just sit at the computer hoping to date, but in the end of the night, they walk away alone.... Because they never tryed to see who just might take the chance.....

A gift to all of you!

A PRAYER FOR LOVE

Teach me to love, Lord, as You love,
Make it unconditional, honest, and kind,
To ask nothing back in return, Lord,
To encompass the whole of mankind.

May I offer my love without speaking,
May it radiate as it shines forth from me,
May it be seen in my face and my eyes, Lord,
May it be simple, sincere, and shame free.

Show me how to forgive, Lord, as You do,
To not burden another with guilt,
To not play the role of the martyr,
To be a rock on which trust may be built.

Make my love for others be greater by far
Than any love that is offered to me,
Led by the Spirit, Inspired of God,
As forgiving as Jesus...and free.

May this love go around and set you all free
to love and be loved and find love...

YEA a Love Date! Congratulations that is great.. fantastic.. Now that is why these sites were made...

To find the one that fits you well, to take a chance and just chill, relax and take a breath.....

O how wonderful for you, I wish you the best may you have found the one women that makes your heart drop with sweaty palms....

Sometimes you just do it and don't look back it is the best way no matter what! Because if you don't give it that one chance you might regret it one day... so close your eyes and JUMP! Take a chance!

Regardless if you make it or not it is that you Tried that is what counts.

I wish you both a happy life... Yea.... congrats...

I will be back on 8-9-10 at 11:12pm

I am so copy and pasting this and giving it too my daughter... for she is the one that stuck her arm up the rear of a cow to pull out a calf what a delight. To bad it Sbit all over her.

Great one.. We love it like always... thanks...

YOU too young and not my type! But I am sure i will run all around these topics today and tell all the hot chicks to come and play... and by the end of the night.. YOU should have a date... Just don't push them away! for only one should play...

How sweet you shared with everyone on Mingle2! But that one on the right with the icing on it with white trim! Please could i have just a bite, and the rest i will feed to my grandchild, who is screaming in the back ground.... Cookie, Cookie, Give me Cookie, I want Cookie..

Please.... If i give it too her... she will sleep tight.. Nap time... LOL

Good points and good words..

Society tells a women to stay in a marriage for the children, as for only me. I gave my Roommate 7 months to decide if he wanted to be married to me? since I asked him... after that he chose to say yes?

I married him, everything was fine, had a child, then another. Life was grand for a while, until i found out he loved unemployment!

so little by little a women learned to protect her young and starve so they get fed.

in the proses she asks for a divorce, but because of society and family they say NO>> it is not allowed! After abuse on wife and kids, again the Police said I am sorry we can not press charges he is your husband, So she runs to the church, and again is told, i am sorry he is your husband vowels have been made "DEATH DO US APART" "FOR BETTER OR WORSE" "IN SICKNESS AND HEALTH".. So I am to stay in a loveless marriage with two kids.

Women and society do not mix for Men run this world, It is only when many women come together and stand up for one another dose the courts, dose society listen... Dose man Realize it is not OK to have a mistress and a wife!.

In the end who really suffered.. the kids hate there father! The mother walks away free and the kids are torn in between.

it is not as easy as said for 18yrs i tried to only be told NO you can not have a divorce. Not all cases are simple and when you Live in the Rich and Famous, you are controlled by a judgment and society that needs to keep there hands clean at all times.

If i was or would have been a simple women in a simple town in a simple world.. I would have been fine but I was not...

So as much as you have said today... To stand tall and walk away was the greatest freedom in the world.

To all women and Men who are controlled, judged and victimized by society. know there is a way out! you just have to find the one person that will listen to you! and help you find you!

1. Man made the bible, God only gave Word and a peice of rock with 10 Rules..
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/32/Decalogue_parchment_by_Jekuthiel_Sofer_1768.jpg/250px-Decalogue_parchment_by_Jekuthiel_Sofer_1768.jpg

I am the Lord your God
You shall have no other gods before me
You shall not make for yourself an idol
You shall not make wrongful use of the name of your God
Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy
Honor your father and mother
You shall not murder*
You shall not commit adultery
You shall not steal***
You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor
You shall not covet your neighbor's wife
You shall not covet anything that belongs to your neighbor

Other then this it says : Do not dwell in the HOUSE OF THE LORD!, for you will not find me there! I am a peasant in the streets washing your feet, i will take bread with you and help the sick, the week and needy, i will heal the blind if you have faith in me!

it is man: for some! points of view that has taken this way out of content. It is words to help us live side by side in a world filled of millions and millions of humans who have there own minds, it is wild animals who do not make are choices for us, it is us and only us that chose to be the people we chose to be. But it is faith when you are ill, or when a loved one needs hope, it is faith when death creeps bye!

Believe or not believe is not even the choice it is the Will one mankind has that gives us joy, laughter and contentment in are lives..

if we lived with, Hate then everyone would be dead that is why the earth was flooded the first time for 40days and nights we hated each other so much we were destroying one another with greed, sex and drink, with abuse and vindictiveness, we were selfish.. but hen God came to say.. Hay.... I made a mistake.. lets do thiS again.. and in the end... WE STILL AS A HUMAN RACES CHOSE DISGRACE!

only a 1/3rd of the world wants peace... United States v The world!

The Greatest thing of all is YOU don't Have to BELIEVE, FOR WE PRAY FOR EVERYONE... in the world.... so even if you do not believe or you chose to not care about faith.... We keep you in our prayers to save your soul. that is what Jesus was all about.... NO matter what you do.... YOU... are thought of today!

Good morning it's 11:30 and this is the first day in over???? Maybe 17months that I have got to sleep in, however I was a awake at 6am told my grandchild to go potty... Loll

Then back to bed, to wake up at 8am... but I stayed in bed watching Cartoons, Gee they have changed sine I was a kid...

Anyway... I first came to this site. Before I destroy... all the other ones with my long long, ok. Long... Opinions...

This has made my day... THANK YOU SO MUCH! “You ARE THE MAN”!

I know I am strict, I know I'm a domineering and forceful most of the time, but it is only because I think of you as my friend, even if I do not know you, that is of no concern, it is that if I could give you just one thing before my time.. It would be Courage to live!

After having cancer and I know! I have! spoken of this often and I am sorry!... it is the most scariest thing ever and no one was there for me, I still have the fear.....what might have been! simple for another women was so devastating to me, and the person that helped me through it came from a on line dating site.. stinks like fish!

When I needed help this man out of the blues offered his time, home and place to help me. And when I was better he returned me to my home... I would have loved to [say we were compatible] but we were not...I wanted sex and he did not... LOL...

anyway... The reason I said that? was because there are people in this world who are willing to help others, we are so supportive in so many ways... It might not be to your lover, or even your kids at times but we always want to help one another...

Jesus was that way.... "Do not dwell in the house of the lord, come out and help the peasants, I will be in the streets washing there feet taking bread with them...

It is what we have done here today; we have come to a place to help a fellow peasant seeking advice, support, and to give courage to a stringer... Telling you' that you CAN DO IT YOU HAVE SUPPORT, from people who love you.... who care and want to be there for you..

we are all different, we are all in are own worlds, some are crying, some are dieing, and some are so lonely they could die, But this Machine is the only thing that saves us from the surroundings around us, we for the first time can talk to stringers and take are world away..

some talk with simple words, quick and simple one liners, others it takes for ever to type and say very few lines, But some are one in a million are like me who only knows Lightly words, who expresses feelings and emotions to help a fellow man/women.

Yes! I always put in my 200cents or tell about my life! but I get so many letters asking me to help, be part of there life, some run away, others stay and play.

But sites like this are supportive, encouraging and up lifting, it helps bring out the true nature of a human, which want only the best for that person...

We are such selfish creatures we only think of our self’s... ‘but today we can think of you”, in helping you!, telling you! About are stories, how we Quit, how we want to quit and we can make this site a special place.

So for all the Men and Women out there who really do want to quit. Today let’s support this man and Quit with him...

If you want to quit...

Add your name so he can see how many are WITH HIM... YOU don’t have to do this alone... We will suffer with you, we are going through the same thing with you, and for the ones that have quit, we can encourage the ones that are trying to quit...

We can help you with advice, how to stop the cravings... how to keep off the weight, and the keep anger and frustration down... how not to “snap off” everyone heads.... and most of all “How to have Courage” for the future is a much brighter place with out all of this.

About me: My experiences with smoking and what caused it and how I stoped it!
I stared when I was 14teen to tick off my parents, they were both smokers. Only one drank! My dad! When I met my husband I did not smoke but he did!.. I was a fool and went back to smoking to end up in a life of Hell…
My ex made us homeless 5 times in 18yrs, all because of cig, drinking and the rest.... but when I fought for my children’s rights and for me to be a non smoker... it was the toughest thing I had to do.

I have been on the gum, patch, the monitor that you push a button and it tells you when to have the next one.... however my ex, he would get up push the button and then when it went off he would bring me a cig... so it was not ME>>>>> that learned how to control>>>> me>>>> ME>>>>> it was him that thought him to control >>>> my ergs...

There came a day, in my life after the Rape! That I needed help badly. And I ran to cigs was smoking 3 packs a day... It was horrible, the teachers told me... Mrs. Smith your kids smell like cigarettes when they come in to class could you please not smoke around them... they were only in Kindergarten.... at the time... did that make me stop?.. Nope.... but it Ticked me off...

It took years, I smoked in my house, with my kids next to me sitting at the dinner table, and I smoked in the car with the windows up and loud music singing... YES! I love my kids, but it never dawned on me that I could be hurting my kids....

I saw no different in them, they were healthy I thought... all I cared was about me, and my husband smoked so it must be ok for me... he brought the cigs home, he always took great care of me, who was I to even question him, he New WHAT WAS BEST FOR ME!

But then, I got sick very sick convolutions and seizers started, I did not know why? Or what was happing to me... I thought I was dieing, why God me.... and yet after I had one I was given a cig to relive the stress and convolutions...

I was quitting drinking at the time, HINT>... no one even considered it might have had anything to do with it but... over 9 yrs later we realized, it was the drinking and smoking that was killing me...

It destroyed my husband to no repair, enough to run him into other women’s arms; it destroyed my kids for now they were left with a broken mother who was sick...

O God I cried, I was suffering so bad just pleases Let me Die, I did not care to be alive I tried to commit suicide.... in the false attempt one day.... a hand came down to me.... was it Jesus I will never know...

But it saved my life... It was my daughters!... I opened my eyes to see tears flowing down her face with my scared little boy next to her... as I laid on the floor I new that day I was really sick...

My husband came in that day after work, he picked me up and walked me into the Councilor Dr. Jenkins.... for week after week, I spoke my fear, my hatred, my tears begin.... I told him story afar story which should have been to my husband... but he hated me so! I was left alone to offend for my self... so i told Dr Jenkins...

With in 2yrs... I got stronger and stronger; he told me something I did not know...

Mrs. Smith if you take away the control from your husband, I guarantee you will never smoke again... Do not allow him to control your life, the way you think and talk, your feelings and emotions you have the right to them... I will give you a 'VOICE'...

SO I Stood UP... and Took my Life back. I sold my home and took a map I said were ever this coin lands is the place you kids will live just don't let it be HELL>>>>> oops...

I also asked my daughter to help me contact all the colleges in the united states... so you can go and become a Veterinary as your dreams are [this to become]... and my son a psychologist . I wonder why? I sure needed help... So we got week after week boxes of colleges.

The final 2 weeks before I packed all my stuff up and sold my home in Nevada! I was leaving my husband who had already been out of the house for almost 2yrs...

We had “set to go to Fort Colleens Colorado’, I was so tickled ready to go... until a week before we leave... and here comes a box... that had the best opportunity for my children. Stillwater Oklahoma OSU... 427 acre..... I was beside my self... NO I said... NO>... I through a huge screaming tantrum...

I have given up drinking given up smoking; I have given up my husband and my family, my house and my career... NO>. Not Oklahoma...

But here I am after 9 yrs.... Why tell this story...

Because it was not about the Cig... it was about “My life” I was so dang unhappy, I had no control over my world, who I was, the way I was, everyone an everything controlled me...

UNTIL.... I SET IT ALL FREE....... I LET GO OF THE PAST, WALKED A WAY FROM THE RELATIONSHIP, AWAY FROM MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS THAT WERE NO FRIENDS TO BE, AND MY CAREER THAT WAS KILLING ME...

So my dear... I know this was a long letter... but NOW you all can see... it is not the Cigarettes that you need...

It is YOU>>>>> YOU NEED YOU!>>>>>

We are all here at Mingle2 to support the truth...

Tell us your story... your fears and emotions, tell us all what is really bothering you... We can not judge you for we do not know you!

To anyone and everyone who has a story on what really became of them quitting... there is an emotional side that caused it and one that releases it....

I am here to support you!!!!!