so okay... i never post anything personal in here because this is usually my laughing ground. but today i'm just at a loss as to what to do.

I moved back into my mother's house in order to go back to school and start over. I'm here to help her with her loneliness. apparently that was a huge mistake.

We are both fat. I mean fat. I know this.. and she knows this.

but as she complains about herself, she does nothing about it. she eats what she wants, cooks what she wants and lives how she wants. and is getting bigger and bigger as life progresses.

yesterday night i watched her eat an entire pint of rocky road ice cream and i couldn't help but cry because it took every single drop of willpower in me to put my ice cream away without eating it all. its getting harder and harder to watch her indulge her addiction while i fight mine.

so i'm doing something that is going to kill me.

i'm foregoing school.

i'm moving out.

i'm scrapping the dream because if i don't, i'm going to end up the size of a house with diabetes and kankles.

what else can i do!?

Wow. That's a tough one. Kudos to you for doing what you think is best for you. I don't know...maybe consider staying and see if maybe you could be the catalyst that changes things for her?? The example for good? That could make it very difficult on you though.

Can you just stay out of the house as much as possible?

i've tried helping her to change, forcing her to change, begging her to change. i've lost 14 lbs. she just sits and eats more.

and to make it worse... she buys the very things that kill me addiction wise.

its like having a crackhead living in your house and stuffing the cupboards with crack.

i live in a small town which makes escape very hard.

i'm no help whatsoever as i just discovered thru a denzil washington interview u apparently CAN'T eat what u like and thats what i do!!

What will happen if/when you tell her you are moving out and why? Will that fracture your relationship with her do ya think?

I know the feeling, I'm diabetic since childhood and I use to love sugar so much now I know that even if my temptation are always there to eat sugar even when people eat it in front of me of offer me some (hey one bite won't kill you) well I know in my heart I can't and just say no and move on.

Do it for yourself and nobody else, do it for your own good and maybe if you can your mum might change (I hope for her). I know it's hard but everywhere you will go temptation will be in front of you.

I told her two nights ago and the guilt trip was so thick i'd wished i wore my boots for the conversation. it breaks my heart to know that i am unable to survive here if she continues to live her life as such.

i think it will create a fissure in our relationship but if i stay and deal with her any further, it will destroy our relationship completely.

its like choosing the lesser of two evils.

I am so sorry about your dilemna...I hope you will be able to find a way. Maybe encourage your mother to walk everyday with you or join a gym with you. If does not work, then you need to take care of yourself. Maybe stay away from the house much as you can by going to the library and read and research something that interest you. I feel for you girl and I wish it will work out well for you without moving out so you can also see and care for your mother.....Sorry

stay. school is too important to give up.

You are strong.

use your strength that you have that allowed you to put away your ice cream.

start buying separate groceries.


check it out.

When I went up to NC last month to help my sister I weighed 200lbs.yes.

her whole house is filled with healthy foods. and protein waters and stuff.

after one month of being there, and with NO exercise, I lost 6 lbs.

as soon as I came home, I went through my cupboards and threw out all the fatty snacks and foods.

went out and bought $150 worth of Special K protein waters, cereals and bought tons of lean cuisines and stuff. even got those stupid 100 calories snack packs. (pansy teases) I have a soda obsession cause I love carbonation, so I switched out and bought 3 cases of diet coke. I have had all of 2 cans since Thursday's shopping. Got a new water filter for my pitcher and bought bunches of those single crystal light pouches to flavor my water. they have 5 calories each.

you can do this.

I do admit, I am hungry and crave pizza. gaming night was hard because we always order pizza. normally I would have had 4 or 5 pieces, but I limited myself to 2 pieces, no crust.

It was hard watching everyone else pig out while I ate my little twerpy 100 calorie snack pack and drank my protein water, but you know what? let them get fat. I am proud of myself for sticking to my weight loss mission.


yes. I am hungry.

all the time

but when my body starts to realise it doesn't need so much food to satiate itself, it will get easier.

I can guide you to some healthy recipe websites if you want. I can be your little fence post for you to lean on when it gets rough. and it will get rough.

you can do it. and you don't need to quit school to do it either.

Well, then that's that. I think you are making the best choice based on what you have said here. And don't let go of the dream of school. If we want things badly enough, they often have a way of revealing a path to achieve them.

Different view.

Be tough enough to stay, go to school & lose weight.
Show mom it can be done, just takes determination & desire.

ARE YOU TOUGH ENOUGH TO MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE????

Do what I do...Walk away when someone is indulging with junk food. I have done that for months and last night I ate too much and got
I think I am getting punished for induging too much and not sticking with my diet...
Wow, sorry about your mom Why doesn't she want to change? Being healthy is better than the alternative

Be your own person and live your life for you. If you happen to become an example for your mother to live better and healthier so be it. Don't change your life or scrap your dreams because of someone else...it's your life...live it.

you must be a soldier for yourself to get where you want to be

I want you to be happy with yourself

As is, you are caught between a rock and a hard stone.

The choice is yours.

You have to ask yourself how strong you really are and whether you have the willpower to do what you want to do.

To give up on your dreams is second best, so what do you say?

i don't know that i am. thats the tough part. its an addiction you cant quit cold turkey. and you can't ween off becuase you need to survive. so its all a matter of willpower. and right now with all thats happening.. i'm surprised i even have willpower.

i created a chubscouts blog that allows my fat pals and i to post about our life and the stresses of dieting. of tryin to lose this weight.

every sunday we weigh in.

i weighed in 5 minutes ago and this week i've lost 1.4 lbs.

that totals me down to 17 lbs lost.

but because i avoid the kitchen and living room where my family eat like fat kings, i have become a total hermit. :(

its horrible.

and thats the rough part. if i try to sit out there ... i get angry and frustrated and its just ugly.

i guess with time it will change but its become soo hard.

Let me tell you that I am absolutely living proof that it can be done. I used to weigh 400lbs. I was miserable. I couldn't lay down to sleep because I couldn't breathe laying down. I couldn't wear a swimming suit...I couldn't keep up with my friends...and I felt so UGLY.

The breaking point came when I was 22 and I was admited to the hospital with blood poisoning. The doctor told me that I had a 15% chance at surviving and walking out of the hospital. He didn't sugar coat anything...if I survived I had better make some drastic changes...and I did.

I knew that a lot of the time I was just mindlessly eating. I didn't even think about it...just cramed as much as I could in my mouth. That had to change. I had to start THINKING about what I ate...and why. I promptly put signs on the fridge and cupboards that said, "Are you REALLY hungry?" I forced myself to answer the question each and every time I went for food.

There is a huge differance between mindless eating and thoughtful eating. When you actually think about the food you slow down. You enjoy each bite. It's not about denial...it's not about forbidding some foods in lieu of others...and it's not about anyone but you. Trust me, I know about temptation. I know how hard it is to watch someone eat an entire box of Twinkies...or devour a carton of ice cream. After a while though, you just stop caring about what other people do and you start concentrating on just you. You focus on how good you feel...how proud you are of your accomplishments...how far you've come.

It's been 10 years since that doctor gave me a death sentence. 240lbs. thinner...a hell of a lot healthier...and so much happier. I still indulge in ice cream, just not a pint. The house still has junk food but I've learned how to enjoy it without going overboard. I can enjoy the taste of chocolate without eating a king sized candy bar. In fact, one Hershey's Kiss is enough to satisfy a chocolate craving...if you do it right.

Don't give up on school...and don't give up on you. Life is measured in baby steps. Live life one day at a time...and if that's too hard, the live it one hour at a time. Remember that you are a strong, smart and beautiful woman...and you can do ANYTHING- no matter how hard it may seem.

And if you ever need an understanding ear..I'm here.