based on their personality in the forums, or do you try and get to know them outside of the forums?

I think we all judge others without getting to know them at times. But in general, do you actually make an attempt to get to know someone and seeing what they're really like, or do you just go by what you see in the forums? And when you do get to know people, do you find that they are mostly like how they are in the forums, or completely different?

I take them at face value, on the forums.
Which means closer than 5000 miles
is too close.

If you're a douche in the forums, chances are you're a douche for real.


Pass

well put...

Being that this is supposed to be a dating site, aren't the Forums meant to be a place where people get to know each other?

Of course, it's not 100% or foolproof. People can be deceiving in person too. How many times have we each been disappointed by someone we knew?

The point is, are we supposed to make up excuses about how we don't really know people?

If so, then some of the detractors are right. This really is a social website rather than a dating site. In which case, half of us should just pack up and go elsewhere.

Truth is, even when we know someone, we may not really know them at all. We can't live in fear. We have to accept some risks....like swimming in a pond. You never know if there are snapping turtles, snakes, or leeches.

True dat.

After ya see posts for a couple years ya can pretty much tell when someone is joking around and such. Look at our friend scoundrel, who
starts threads just to get a rise out of people.

There are also the drunk posts, and people change their religions and views over time. I've seen that here and that's alright to.

At times some people's posts peaks my interest in wanting to know them better, or the opposite, where posts by some convince me I don't want to get to know some at all.

I've met some who disappointed me, some I met and adore. We all don't have to be best friends. We do however all need to be accepting and tolerant of others....it's just a good way to be.

Not all the time ... the douche mode might not show on the forums

This!

I treat everyone slightly differently. whichever way I am towards you on a personal level. I would still be that way towards you in real life.

You can tell when I'm not happy, or don't like you, cuz I go quiet.

Only time I loose it, is if you are one of those people, that keeps on shaking, the old tin can!

Yes..... I've said this before, I judge everyone!


Now smarten up will youz ???

I try to use as little judgement as I can in everything I do...

Well said.

There are definitely some who post in such a way that makes me not want to get to know them. Do I think they're like that for real? Who knows. I wouldn't know unless I actually took the time to get to know them. But, if someone is rude or mean or takes things way too seriously all the time, I usually pass on chatting with them. Life is too short to worry much about those I may not get along with.

Other than that? I have contacted people because of what they've said in the forums in order to get to know them better. Most I get along well with, but we're not going to get along with everyone. I would hope that others do the same as well, however that's not always the case. To each their own, though.

That being said, the handful of people I have actually met from here have been pretty cool and just like I thought they'd be. Others have made me want to meet them after getting to know them. Maybe it will happen one day.

well so far I have only met one person from mingle in RL and there is another that I talk/text with regularly. They are both awesome to me!

I don't judge in a sense that I wouldn't talk to someone who's posts in the forums don't mesh with me, but no I am not going to put in a big effort to get to know them in RL.

Generally though, your gonna disagree with everyone on one topic or another so I don't worry too much unless they are just rude or annoying overall. There are not very many people that I just can't get along with and I don't have some huge list of incompatible mingletards laying around.

I am a people person at heart, I enjoy making friends so there will be many more to meet in the future!!!

I don't judge people that I know of. I have gotten the wrong impression from people, but after getting to know them better, turns out they were completely opposite of that impression.

I look for intention. Why are they posting the way and what they post. Underlying tones that signify intention.

I need to know intent to be able to judge character.

There are those on the threads who have malicious/downgrading/pessimistic intent, those are ones I would never want to know. The best way to catch intent is when they are angry about something.

Outside of that I would give anyone a chance to show their personal self that I don't think gets shown well online.

In that case, I may have judged you wrong.

I've never met anyone who did this, and then admitted to it.

If they can't spell in the forums, odds are they can't spell in real life either.