Maybe but you know a lot of kids that are different like that or nurds or who ever they will find a click you know a group of kids like them selves and hang out, plus that way there is safty in mumbers.

I understand it is not by association, that one becomes gay. I have a this gut-feeling and based on what I observe and see everyday, that gives me this "I think" conclusion, I wish, I was wrong.

Please stay within the topic, it was about my son not with my ex-husband. Thanks for your opinion.

Well hopefully its some thing he will grow out of , i have some friends you would bet money they were gay but there not.

I'm sure you can understand, as you were responding to my post where I said there was no reason to try to correct them with a list of reasons to correct them. If you're going to give a list of reasons to correct them, I'm sure you can see why someone may think you think they should be corrected.

No need to be condescending just because your point wasn't made clearly. You do that a lot.

Have you tried talking to him about it?

I didn't say that, that's over the top. What I have in mind is that, things may have been better if he was surrounded with males, his father, uncle, cousins some role model that will show him how man rolls.

so true, whenever i need to bring him with his group mates, it's all young ladies. that's why, I asked why?

I know what you mean, I have a very feminine friends before who were not gays. The reason I need to write it, coz I need opinions from others that might have the same experience as me. I am looking for possible solutions not judgement. Thank you for your input.

Your right its the peoples job to fit into society. I do not happen to believe in conformity, or that we have to fit into the mold of the majority. I really didn't see any studies on the prediposition of depression in homosexuals in your statements either. So, I have to believe that your statements are your beliefs and conjecture, as well. If you wish me to do a research paper with notations on studies linking depression to homosexuals or lack there of, please let me know, but it better count towards my classes for my Human Services Degree in Family and Youth Counseling. Yes, I do have a degree in Human Services. This means I studied Psychology, Sociology, Abnormal Psychology, Counseling Theories, Interviewing and Counseling Skills, Ethics, and Multi-cultural differences among many others. I worked as a Social Worker for four years and an Domestic violence advocate and completed two internships in the Psychology field. I am working on working in the Victim/Witness Advocacy field at this time. I do not believe my opinions on the matter remain baseless. Yes, I spoke with studied and befriended homosexuals learned of how they and their families learned to cope with who they were. It's not really their job to learn to cope with the rest of us, but societies process of learning to cope with reality as it affects more and more people everyday. Since, homosexuals seem to be forming their own sub-society within society and has been recognized as sexual orientation by the Federal Government. Many states recognize the homosexual and making laws toward the benfits of the homosexual society daily.

By the way, I am not your sister. I, also, did not see one statistic inyour comment. Did I miss them? Only a statement that your statistics suggest what you say. Funny thing about statistics, they can be made to show whatever the scientific study wants them to show. I wouldn't trust statistics without knowing the variables used, the process in which they were taken, and what type of statistical study was taken.

My son is autistic, I know how you feel. Every day I worry that he'll be teased at school. The best thing for your son would be for him to fit into society as a normal male, regardless of if he is straight or gay. It will be easier for him to get accepted in high school and beyond.

I think this kind of thing has to come from inside the person. My experience has been not to try to 'correct' it but to stay consistent in my values and my reasons and continuing to love him but not define him by this lifestyle. HE knows he is loved, and he can respect the reasons I believe what I believe. I let him 'explore' the world and just hope the worst doesnt befall him.

THere is always a chance that something may turn his affections away from such a strict lifestyle, the same way something turned him from being more 'open' to exploring both genders, but that is something that has to come from inside him and I have to accept that it is unlikely in the current culture as the more we identify ourselves in a certain way and have it REINFORCED in our daily lives the more concrete that identity will become as life goes on.

what about a confused, emotionally immature teen(or younger) who is neither straight nor gay, but completely confused about HOW to define themself?

we arent talking 'guys' or 'females' , we are talking about children and teens. How can people be so insistent that their environments cant influence them when that is proven untrue on so many other social levels? Of course, it is possible, environment can even influence self identity.

the behavior is something that can be 'corrected' by addressing the issues you are concerned with from the stand point of a concerned mother

I have done so in my own situation too, had those talks with my son to tone it down and not 'act' so flagrantly. He is normally fairly laid back, but sometimes he really buys into that whole flagrant, feminine, dramatic thing that he thinks is fun. He understands though, that its just not the appropriate way to behave and will limit his possibilities in life. Of course he is college aged. BUt my point is that if the relationship there is strong enough, you can simply point out your concern and talk to him about it directly.

Did your son's environment influence his being homosexual? Every homosexual I asked about their sexuality stated they were born that way. I have never heard a homosexual state that their environment influenced their sexuality. Most were raised normally with a normal two parent family, involved in sports, etc.

Some were married with nuclear families because they thought that's was society wanted them to be, but found they weren't happy in the traditional relationship. They ended up becoming divorced hurting their partner and nuclear family. They did end up in happy relationship with the same gender.

Child Development: Nuture VS. Nature

Environment and sexual orientation is research into possible environmental influences on the development of human sexual orientation. Some researchers distinguish environmental influences from hormonal influences[1] while others include biological influences such as prenatal hormones as part of environmental influences.[2]

Research has shown that it is a combination of genetic, hormonal, and environmental influences,.[3] Research has examined the possible genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural influences on sexual orientation, but no findings have emerged that permit scientists to conclude that sexual orientation is determined by any particular factor or factors.[4] Research suggests it is biological in nature, determined by a complex interplay of genetic factors and the early uterine environment. Many think that nature and nurture both play complex roles.[4]

I apologize for getting off topic.

I think most people, straight or gay, have come to trust and accept the cultural philosophy that they are 'born' that way. I know my sons environment influenced him. Environment influences us all. I have no reason to believe it didnt influence him in his self identification as well.

Oh okay. I apologize for trying to put words in your mouth. I can see where you are coming from. You will have to excuse me as all my relatives are either addicts, alcoholics or religious fanatics. Especially those who are a combination of all three. I have a tendency to forget that there are normal people out there.

In order for the nuture to influence the nature or genetic disposition. He had to hav a genetic predisposition to the sexual orientation to begin with. Otherwise, if his genetic predisposition was for all intense purposes staright his surroundings would not be able to nuture his sexual orientation into homosexuality.