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| Topic: One GLORIOUS profile - part 7 | |
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"describing ones self is not a easy thing to do! what i will say is this, i am a laid back guy who gets along with everyone."
I see you found the template. |
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(Ideal Date) "Could walk around a city with no purpose and find random things while we get to know one another"
If you mean 'treasure hunt' on a first date, that would be original. If you are hoping to find a wad of discarded chewing gum that we can add to the massive collection back at your apartment, I'm going to have to opt out of this one. |
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"Any ongoing dating will require physical contact..hugs, kissing etc. I think women call it Chemistry."
No, that's foreplay. |
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"That said, if your OCD involves eating the whole gallon of ice cream in one sitting, you may also be a little too OCD for me."
OCD and binge eating have been combined? I didn't get the memo on this one either. Maybe I need to fire my assistant... |
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"I'm not the militant vegetarian type."
And here I was expecting a long-haired, tree-hugging hippie who wears hemp clothing, carries tofu in his pockets and spouts the evils of meat while trying to convert me to be vegetarianism. As long as you're not THAT guy... |
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"Lets see, Im guess Im gonna try this again. Apparently people dont even read these things, so what should I say?"
What am I...chopped liver? I read them! 
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(First Date Disclaimer) "Warning: Mischief Experience Depends Upon Customer, Your Mischief May Vary."
I told you, I'm NOT wearing the Sasquatch outfit while we steal the gnomes out of little ol' ladies gardens! |
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"I am a whine lover looking for another whine lover."
...as in Doug and Wendy from the old SNL skit? |
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"Some people don't get my sense of humor and think I am a HUGE ***hole, but I am actually a really laid back guy, have never cheated on a girl, and don't lie. (and only a small ***hole)"
Does size really matter? |
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Edited by
LilOlMeFromSD
on
Sat 10/23/10 01:49 PM
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"Do not message me if you are a stripper, bartender, waitress, aspiring actress, Scorpio, if you are wearing a tiara in any of your pics, or if you have implants....it never works."
...process of elimination? Or, did you figure all of that out from one woman? |
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"Bonus points if you are petite, with light skin and blonde hair"
How many points is it worth for me to drop ten bucks on a bottle of hair dye? |
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"Whom I am interested in is a woman that has her ducts in a row."
Hang on, let me call my contractor. He probably knows if they are or not. |
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"I do not wish to date any more ostriches.."
Try llamas, I hear they don't henpeck ya' near as much. |
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"drop me a hello and lets start to chat and meet for or something else. to be happy that we met, then maybe we can set up a dinner date and who knows maybe we'll have that spark that will lead us down the path to I CANNOT BELIEVE THE PEOPLE HERE THAT VIEW AND DON'T BOTHER TO SAY HI, IT'S LIKE A GAME TO MOST. HOW SAD. DOES THIS SITE REALLY WORK????"
I'm thinking...ANGER MANAGEMENT???? |
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"So If your Good In Algebra Maybe you could be The Tudor."
What does algebra have to do with English royalty? |
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"What else to say its hard to put so much about oneself down because all the great things lie within unless they are totally evil."
What the hell are you trying to say? Your evil twin makes you do things? |
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"I am well seasoned"........  hmmmmmm scary!
Seasoned with what, Mrs. Dash? |
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"I'm working full time locally, and, after recovering from the recent trauma of cutting my hair short, am looking to start gettin out and makin some new friends......if more develops from it all the better...."
Was your hairdressers name Delilah? |
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"I think the Universe wants us to be happy, have fun and help other people."
Then why is it trying so hard to do the exact opposite? |
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"i am a good woman, i could say many thinks about me"
A mind-reader, huh? Tell me what I'm thinking right now. I dare you. |
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