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| Topic: One GLORIOUS profile - part 7 | |
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"We dont have alot of time on this earth and it shouldnt be wasted with nice women out there"
Your ad campaign appears to be working. |
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"I would rather be single and happy than a woman who is fake."
Dude, you are a guy. |
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"I new to the area. And lookin for a **** buddy."
Does this pick-up technique really work? Come on. |
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"I miss you and am really close to my area to help from them later"
What? Did Timmy fall in the well, Lassie? |
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"I am neither democan or repubiclicrat,"
Dyslexic politician? |
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"LIFE TO SHORT FOR A BUNCH OF DROMA. if thats what your about keep lookin. thats not me. im simple."
Enough said. |
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"I cook,clean&talk"
Yes, but can you put the toilet seat down when you are finished? |
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"you must be a good cummunicator first and foremost!"
You first. |
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"Will fill this in later. Will fill this in later. Will fill this in later. Will fill this in later. Will fill this in later. Yadda Yadda Yadda Yadda."
Do you repeat everything you say four or five times? |
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"I've been known to be kicked out of a few stores for playin around in the toy department(sorry I like to test toys before I buy them..."
Was this in one of those *ahem* adult stores? Awkward. |
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"Men are like cell phones. Without a charge they are lifeless. Women are like chargers. They provide power to man. Every woman has all these qualities within her that she desires from man."
Daddy always told me I was 'sitting on a gold mine' but, nobody has ever told me I could use that thing to charge my cell phone! |
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"If women would allow man to plug into her charger, she would find that man is a reflection of herself."
Sorry, I don't lend my charger out to just anyone. |
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"She will find love because women are love and she established a power connection to his lifeless cellphone(man)."
Is 'cellphone' an analogy for a 'phallus'? |
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Ladies if you want to find that man and be in love there are 2 things you must do. 1st Don't let your past effect your future by judging men from your previous relationships. 2nd Restore your faith in man by reaching out. We need to be charged! (smile) I'm unique because I realize looks fade, and I realize sex is a way you express how much you care about that person.
Excuse me? You think...I...Omg! Back away from me slowly and I won't tell Fido to rip your cellphone off. |
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"im looking for a woman that enjoys good conversation,holding hands and taking long walks,traveling,fine dining,the out doors ,kissing,watching movies,or just getting butt-naked and cuddling.."
'Butt-naked', does that mean I can still wear a t-shirt? Oh, and socks? |
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"Im just lookin for what everyone wants.."
You may want to rethink that since that one guy wanted to be relocated to the bottom of a volcano. |
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"I'm looking for a SUCCESSFUL man."
...meaning you'd better have money. |
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"The best way to know about me is to read this profile. It wouldn`t tell you all you might want to know, but it is a start. I am not here with some specific goal."
It's like I've known you all my life. |
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"Love is saying goodbye and knowing you will be back by mutual consent..."
No, I think that's "joint custody." |
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"i cat have a good laugh and make jokes."
OK, I'd like to meet your cat. |
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