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| Topic: One GLORIOUS profile - part 7 | |
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"Looking for that situation that just happens without being forced."
I'm afraid. |
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"If you have looking for my best friend, life partner, or forever, I just might be the wrong person."
Well, I know you are the wrong person. I'm looking for your best friend. Where is he? |
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"I went into law enforcement so that I could go hiking everyday."
Yes, and I became an astronaut because I wanted to go spelunking everyday. |
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"I have learned to appreciate sleeping in a bed and the networking opportunities in a larger city."
Do not continue! I don't want to know what you do for a living. |
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"I'm into keeping myself ready for emergencies. Not fully sure why."
For some reason, this made me think of Ron White. I'm not sure why. |
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"So, recently am practicing nifty techniques in nutrition ego reduction."
What foods lower your consciousness? |
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"love finds you and it shakes your heart and moves your souls into each others path."
Actually, that sounds more like a poltergeist. |
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"You will know when your heart truly beats for the first time..."
Past Life Exercise: You are getting very sleepy. We want to know when your heart first began to beat. Now travel back to the time you were a fetus.... |
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"Believe it or not l, I wrote that.."
I believe. |
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"I am also very down to earth, I will wait to hear from you"
Did you bring provisions? It could be a long wait. |
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"I have no idea what I'm looking for. If I did I would have found it by now. Lol. No crazies please!! If you're not sure call a ex and ask him. Thanks."
I just had to include this one for the level of politeness. He even offers a helpful tip to find out if we (women) are crazy or not. |
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''talking in southern voice''
 now hold on just darn minute has anybody seen king kosovo kitty that blasted sourpuss been contaminat'in my p.c. with those darn pussycat porn sites again ''can heir cat being pleasured in the background''
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"I have an army of minions, but am also in the market for a psychotic sidekick."
By minions, do you mean children? |
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"If you would like a personal introduction to my samurai sword, send me a message with a list of your villainous deeds of the day"
You ain't introducing me to that thing. God only knows where it's been! |
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"Take a shot with me and I will have you rolling on the floor - - - - -!!! Laughing!! Lmao... You naughty girl (I like it), tell me what you were thinking.."
The initial stages of Tourette syndrome. |
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"I just got out of a 7 year relationship that was total mistake from the first day."
Yet you stuck around for another 2,556 (approx.) days to make sure your first impression was correct. I'm in awe. |
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"hard worker with a good seance of humor."
Are you channeling Richard Pryor? |
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"Be patient with me, I type like a trained chicken"
I love circus acts. |
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"looking for someone who can laugh til tears run down their legs!"
I think you meant... Aw, hell, I don't know what you meant. |
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"Life's to short to be shy, grow a pair and e-mail me, I promise to be nice. Todd"
Did you just tell me to 'grow a pair'? |
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