Will be getting ready to go to a meeting in a hour to make coffee. I hope our AA members are able to stay sober through the fourth. Holidays are good times to make meetings for just in case.

Had a good meeting, tonight. I am glad I went. My friend who attends and usually chairs at the other meeting place in the next town over already had the coffee going. It was a stag meeting but we still had fun. I got to give the topic of rewards. It used to be that alcohol was our reward for working hard. I was amazed that our little group of guys went over the time limit where the fourth guy didn't even want to say anything but happy to just be part of the group. We have found a way to reward ourselves today without the need for alcohol in our lives and that is a miracle because we can enjoy each others' company in our fellowship. We are definitely not a glum lot and I am thankful for that.

So, when does someone become an alcoholic? Is it the number of drinks per week? Or is it something else? What's the difference between a regular drinker and an alcoholic?

You can find some 'quizzes' online to determine if you have a drinking problem.

Typically........
Once you start you have little or no control how much you will consume.
Black outs are another ominous sign. You can't remember what happened when you were drinking. Example: The last thing I remember was drinking up in the mountains, swimming in a river....about 3 pm. The next thing I remember is waking up at home, around 10:30...I said to my roommate that there was still time to go to the bar, she told me we just came home from the bar a few hrs ago. NO memory of the intervening time or events.

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=71

Here are some good questions from AA.org

Yes to 11 out of 12.............no morning 'eye opener'

We had a barbecue grill out meeting for our GSR who is moving to Arizona. I was late getting to the meeting since my tire on my van shredded. Was glad we had the car as a backup. I was ready for the meeting after I found out I couldn't get the hatchback to open up so I could lower the spare. I kept on pushing the console button since I got the van without a key to the hatchback, It probably made sense to to put air in the tire when i noticed this last week when the tire was getting low. it was a wonderful meeting about anger and boy could I sure relate. I was glad our new member brought up the subject that she had 14 days sober and her husband acknowledged that but thought that she could do more. It really helped one member who found his wife having sex in their bathroom with another man. It was interesting to note that wife and boyfriend locked him out of house. I could understand why thought he had the need to take an ax to the door. Although, when they threw the door at him and he took the ax to the roof to get in that way I found that maybe I wasn't alone with my anger as there are others who have had problems with anger in their life. I felt a lot better when I left the meeting knowing that I didn't have to suffer alone.

OMFG.....got a call from old sponsor out in Colorado. He just celebrated 30 yrs. He celebrated at the Arid Club....ran into some folks who remembered when and my name came up....my old roommate Mikie gave him the ph. number to the house.

It was good to listen to this man again. He hadn't changed a bit in his approach to staying sober. Thank God. Cowboy John, Jerry F. Mel. B
Gary D. Roy E. Mitch, Gene J. Gil G. Irv M. these guys were the "Pillars of Sobriety" when I came to A.A. In reality they had about 1-3 yrs sober. But we looked up to them and listened to their experience, strength, and hope. They are all still sober or died sober. I am so grateful for what they taught me.

Wow. Thats cool. I keep sharing information from a former sponsor in my meetings. I miss him at times but glad I got a new one since I moved away from that area. The fellowship is wonderful.

Went to an AA meeting, tonight. It had been a while and I felt like I should make one. It was Step and Big Book study night. As we were reading in the chapter called, 'More about Alcoholism' one member said that during his first meeting an old timer said something that just pissed him off. I replied that everything that everyone said that first meeting pissed me off. It sums it up pretty good on page 34.

"For those who are unable to drink moderately the question is how to stop altogether. We are assuming, of course, that the reader desires to stop. Whether such a person can quit upon a nonspiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not. Many of us felt that we had plenty of character. There was a tremendous urge to cease forever. Yet we found it impossible. This is the baffling feature of alcoholism as we know it---this utter inability to leave it alone, no matter how great the necessity or the wish."

Hi there! New here and glad to see I am not alone. I just celebrated 2 years on 8-10! What I would like to share is that recently we had a wonderful member who had 12 yrs killed by a drunk driver last week. And we were talking about how that drunk driver may come into the rooms someday and how will be able to put principals before personalities? We were really hurt by this unnecessary accident. But for the grace of God, there go I.

Glad you could make it and yes it is good not to feel alone. One thing my old sponsor shared with me before I moved here was that, "You will never have to be alone again unless you choose to." I like what you had to say. Just last week I was with my brother-in-law and he was commenting on this sign that said, "Slow down the life you save may be your own." It made an impression on him more than the $750.00 fine he just paid recently for drinking while driving. It is one of those dangerous intersection out in the country where it is cheaper to put a regular sign than it is to put a sign that says stop sign ahead. As you know county highway signs have to be maintained. I asked him if he had quit drinking. He said no but he had slowed down some and doesn't drink while he is driving. As I went to my hometown meeting tonight which I haven't been to in a while my new sponsor asked me as I was getting out of the van if this was my first meeting. It kind of reinforced what my old sponsor said when he said that AA is for other people. Meaning that we should go to a meeting whether we think we need one or not.

The Higher Power will put this man exactly where he needs to be when the time comes.

But how do we handle someone coming in to the rooms that has deeply hurt us or wronged us in the past? I mean I wish I had a magic wand and could grant serenity and sobriety on everyone who wants it... But at what cost to my own serenity? As you can tell this goes beyond the annonymous drunk driver killing one of our fellowship members. This incident got me really thinking about who may be coming through those doors (Lord knows they need to) at some point and what will I do?

I think that is how many new meetings get started. One of our traditions is "Principles be Personalities". In the book "AA comes Of Age" and the "12 by 12" themselves it is discussed whether AA could survive. In the "Traditions" they tried a lot of things and some of them did not work. The "Traditions" were carved out of what worked and what did not work. Part of Chapter 5 of the "Big Book" is entitled "How It Works". Evidently, what you mention might be one of the things that we might balk at. But sobriety has to come first and if we have to find a different meeting then we have to realized that. Sometimes our higher power puts different people and different situations in our life to promote our growth. That which doesn't kill us can truly help us. Amazingly, we don't have to learn all things the hard way. I have gotten significant help in Al-anon with my ex and my father who was an alcoholic at one time. There is more to schooling than just hard knocks. We can share our experience, strength and hope and we can all learn from it. In the beginning for me I have walked into a meeting and right back out because I just did not feel comfortable with someone who was there. But I still wanted what AA had to offer so I found a different meeting.

Fridays' meeting was good. One of our female members said that she gave up on controlling her husband but is working on her control of how she reacts to him. I needed to hear that. It is really something I can use in dealing with the residents at work. I think it can really help my professionalism. My sponsor's wife got out of the nursing home, yesterday. She has been able to build up her biceps from the triangle bar above the bed and her leg muscles from walking with the walker. She is walking on her own now. I am getting better in referring to the residents as Miss and Mister instead of hon. It is helping me not to get so manipulated by the residents. Familiarity can breed contempt. Principles before personalities is even helping me in my job.

A thread of substance! Love it!!!

Nice to see the sharing and support on here.....One day at a Time!

back in the day..my sponsor asked me two simple questions..

1. have you ever tried to control your drinking and found that you couldnt?

2. have you ever tried to quit drinking and found that you couldnt...

a Yes answer could mean a drinking problem....

Its wonderful isn't it. I love it, too. I just got from a meeting. I got to give the topic because I was the chairperson. I never have to worry about anyone taking my chair because all of us there hate being responsible. We avoid responsibility like it was a plague or something. My topic was, "I am still." I got it from reading, "A Vision For You." We are suppose to ask in our morning meditation what we can do for the alcoholic who is still sick. See, I always took that to mean somebody other than myself. When it got to my friend he asked us the group what the topic was. I couldn't help but think to myself, "Good point, Jim". Then after the meeting my friend wanted a court paper because his therapist wanted him to get them signed. I told him that he could come to the meeting to get one. He said that he didn't want to because he thinks we are all a bunch of hypocrites. I thought I would bring him to the meeting so he could use that as a topic. Topic, we don't need no freaking topic. We all are a bunch of mad libbers.