What could've made him more desirable is not being so fussy.
Being difficult about buying an air-fryer because you don't know it's good while it only costs about E70 isn't sexy. I mean, I got one and my income is much lower than his. It's not a major investment. You just read reviews online and go for it.

He was the same when wanting to buy a painting of me. He could easily afford it and really wanted it, but then still took 6 months to decide. Both times he bought a painting.
That kind of attitude isn't sexy.
Not to me anyways.

Good point, haha.
For me it only works if a man has a real good body and/or if I take an interest in him.

The latter isn't a must, I mean, when I see a man on the beach with a great body I sure as hell feast my eyes!

No idea. The only thing we've exchanged after this last encounter is saying we had a good time.
If he's going to suggest another visit at some point I will probably decline.
Because he clearly hopes for more and I absolutely don't.

No idea. I never asked, haha.

Agreed.
And I think he maybe intents to do just that: hanging in and wait for things to evolve regardless of the current situation.

He kept trying by the way. At least that's what I think it was:
Before leaving he had to change back into his biker clothes. Took him forever and he kept walking around in his boxers??
Me thinking, "WTF are you trying to achieve here?"
I think he was hoping I'd change my mind by walking around half naked? But if someone kind of tries to force something upon me, it puts me off even more than the original thought of being intimate with him did.
No matter what age, when a woman says "no" it still means "no" and doing what he did isn't respecting that.

Chemistry & connection is there or it isn't. You cannot forcefully create it.

Hahahaha, give it a shot. You never know, lol.

The full story was that he was initially going to come over with another man from the datingsite. They became bike-buddies.
They wanted to do a bike ride and visit me.

But the other one didn't come in the end as he has physical issues and the distance was too much for him.
And yes, he truly said that stuff about an airfryer.
I have no idea if he bought one in the end, never asked.

2 years ago I had a date with a man from a dating site.
That didn't work out at all, we both felt that way.
I kinda expected it upfront and we just didn't really click.

Nevertheless we occasionally stayed in touch. Not necessarily as friends but because he was interested in a couple of my paintings, over time bought two of them.
And I did a reading for him, paid for as well.

In any case, he wanted to visit me somewhere in August, just a friendly visit. He wanted to give food from an air-fryer a shot before buying one and I have one.
And he just liked to come & see me.
I consented.
But for me there's nothing more, I have no feelings for him.

Some time went by and then he said to visit again and go out to dinner.
So to me that's like "you made dinner last time, now I will return the favour."

Dinner was lovely, great food, conversation etc. also okay.
But he still isn't a good match concerning love for me.
Before we went to the restaurant he was fishing, said something in the vein that it was enough to like each other, that possibly more could come from that. Or that just liking each other was enough.
Well, not for me! And I made that clear as well.

I didn't give any sign that I was interested in more, or in sex.
Yet back at my place for a cup of coffee to end the day he suddenly asked if I wanted him to spend the night.
WTF???
NO!
It actually came out of the blue, took me by surprise.

Of course he didn't spend the night. He doesn't turn me on so even if I had wanted sex, it wouldn't have worked.

I've never believed in men & women being friends and I feel this proves my case.
There's always one who wants more. Unless one or both are gay.

I still don't know what made him think of asking that question.

Friday again! Doesn't time fly?!
Enjoy the weekend everyone!

The restaurant we went to turned out to be really good!
I had Zeeuws (Zealand's) fish-soup which was excellent.
Then I had tournedos with pepper-sauce. All meals are served with 2 types of salad (beetroot and cucumber) and french fries.

Yesterday at home I had hotchpotch with minced beef, still thinking about the lovely dinner I had the day before though, haha.

Not sure yet. I'm going out to dinner tonight with a man I've met via a dating-site. Just friends.
I'm thinking it's going to be a nice juicy steak. They've got fish stuff as well, but not in the mood for that.

Stolen Girl - 2025
Based on a true story.

A really good movie! And they managed to do it without turning it into a sob-story. Very well done.

Seriously??? The immune system is designed to work on unhealthy alien things it hasn't encountered before. And to recognise it if it comes in contact with it again.
That testing for any unhealthy substances is vast, even the mouth is part of it.

If it wouldn't work for things that it had never encountered before it would be useless.
If you were right, how do you think it would have gained the knowledge to recognise something as 'unhealthy'?
It's not like we're hooked up to a computer and the info is added. The body does that itself.
And it does that from scratch as when a baby is born is has to build up its immunity from almost 0.
Only a few things get passed during pregnancy.

I never get why people argue when they have no understanding of a subject, but alas.

I totally get that, but it wasn't meant as a joke nor meant to be condescending.

I happen to be on a dating site where the average age is too high for me, and that automatically means there are quite a lot of widow/ers.
What I hear from many of them is that they cannot really imagine ever loving another man/woman since they loved their spouse so much.
In essence they cannot love someone else as a partner.
Yet they do still long to have love, something to care for and so on.
Many if not all of them have a cat or a dog.

Only you know what you're ready for and when.
I don't think there is a default time for that.
What you can do is get clear for yourself what you actually want / need right now and what you can offer right now.
And then convey that clearly in your profile.

I went through it again and it contradicts itself all over the place. If I was interested in you, your text would put me off.

You mention looking for friendship, but the woman would have to move to your area!!?. Why would a woman move for friendship? Sounds very demanding. And why aren't you willing to move to her?
And looking for friendship, but you do want touch and intimacy.

Then you speak of dating and a relationship, are very fussy about what kind of woman would be acceptable to you, even describing what her nose has to be like? Seriously?

Then you tell that you've already been with the one and only love in your life. That means you have nothing to offer any woman.
Yet after that you continue to say what you're looking for in dating & relationship?

How can you look for dating and relationship if love clearly isn't on the table?

Aside from all that, your profile text is way too long.
I'd seriously advise you to take the time to figure out what you have to offer as it doesn't sound like much from your text.
And what you want from a woman.
Is it friendship only? So you have someone to go places and do things so you're not alone so much?
Or is it FWB, sex included? Or do you want someone you can fall in love with & have a real love relationship with, woe her, flirt, cherish her and so on?

Then convey that in a much shorter and much clearer profile text.

And no offense... it's a serious suggestion, have you thought of getting a dog? Many lonely people get a pet so there's something to pet, love, care for. And another living creature that's happy when you get home and so on.

I am not lonely, but if I wouldn't have my 3 cats I'd feel horribly alone and the house would feel empty.

Even if you cannot love another woman, you will be able to love an animal and enjoy having it around.
It can bring happiness & joy into your life and it's a much better solution than using another human being as a stop-gap for the emptiness you feel in life.

No, it's never too late! People can fall in love at all ages and as far as I can tell it feels exactly the same as it did when you were 16 or 20 or...
In a way it's even more pure & deeper as you now know much better what you need in order to be fulfilled.
So in that sense the chances of the one you fall in love with being a good match are much higher.

The only difference can be that after divorce or losing a partner people can remain stuck in their disappointment and/or hurt.
From there it isn't possible to fall in love.
But if you're healed and ready for new love, it sure as heck can happen!

Wearing my Friday shirt again :)

Profile in itself is fine.
The 'but' is in the facts that you can't change, not at this moment anyway: you have nothing to offer a woman as you already had the one & only love in your life and recently lost her.

So a woman has to give up on her dreams and the hope of finding new love, and be happy she gets the chance to play second fiddle in your life.
You expect a woman to settle for crumbs because you can't deal with being on your own?

That's what you're asking. No offense, but that's immature and selfish.
Since you recently lost your wife it'd be best to wait a while before going on a dating site.
You've got to find your own feet first.

Trying to get a new woman to use her as a stopgap isn't going to take your pain away. You'll have to work through it regardless. And it's mean to use another person.

The tunnel thing is a new one on me too.

What the ones in power are aiming for is far deeper & scarier than what the OP talks about though. That's just superficial stuff.
The most creepy thing is the plan to have chips and whatnot put into human bodies as improvement.
Problem with that is that you then also can control emotions, thoughts, feelings, and turn the whole world population into numb 'things'.

The pandemic showed us that -and them- that when you create hysteria among people about dying they're very eager and willing to have a substance shot into them. Even when they know said substance is new, not properly researched and the side-effects unknown.

Now they know that, and they can use it against us whenever they want.

They're screwing with the whole of nature, the whole of creation. And yes, technologically more advanced aliens are involved in this. Governments are working together with them.
One of the places this happens is deep underground in Alaska wilderness. There's a huge black pyramid there, larger than the one in Giza, and an enormous research facility where aliens and humans work together.
The ones who have remotely viewed this -just like the people did for the CIA in project Stargate- have also said that the aliens have a thing in mind that's not good for us but that the humans there do not know about their secret plans.

I think people should pay more attention to movies like MiB 1 and Terminator movies. And possibly even the Matrix ones.

I had lasagna Bolognese. I had bought a nice salad so I'd have greens with it, but in the end didn't eat it.
Tomorrow I'm going to eat nasi goreng (fried rice) and chicken satay and I will have the salad with that :)

Various reasons can complicate things...
Often people are looking for someone with qualities they themselves do not embody.
Then it is difficult if not impossible to attract such a person.
If you'd make a list of things you seek in a mate and then go over said list to check all the thing you yourself embody and not check the ones you don't embody it becomes clear where you still have some work to do ---> inner & personal growth & development.

It can truly be helpful to do that!


Another reason that makes it difficult for women especially... and that's not gender bashing but I'm sure it'll upset some egos, hihi...
Women are ahead in personal & collective development. This is usually the case, the feminine evolves & grows first, the masculine follows later on.

Right now we are in a bit of a pickle as women in general (meaning, not all) have reached a point where they no longer put up with a relationship that doesn't serve them (anymore).
They've outgrown the old (often patriarchal) matrix.
They can and do choose themselves, their own happiness over a dysfunctional relationship and/or a new partner that isn't on this new level yet.

And that last part is where many many many women bump into a spanner in the work when it comes to finding a great romantic partner.

The fact that women have reached this level, and that things are changing collectively, has men confused and off-kilter.
They can no longer hide behind how things used to be, their work, status, computer etc.
Men are also searching, trying to figure out a new way of doing things when it comes to love & relationship.
But many have become insecure and are still stuck in the old matrix, and when they feel the woman is slipping away, he shifts into victimhood, pleasing, getting angry, defensive behaviour, or simply disappearing into himself so to speak.
Men are on the brink of their own breakthrough, the one that women have already had, but they still have trouble feeling what they're actually feeling and thus cannot find their way 'in'.

All these things aren't just individual, they're huge collective processes. Not easy to explain, you got to intuit as you read, feel it.

It is said that in 2-3 years men also get to the point that they outgrow the old ways and the old matrix.
Reading that had me PO for a moment. Having to wait yet another 2-3 years???
By that time I'm 61-62. I'm fed up with men not being ready, have been for years as I'm one of these first women to get that 'breakthrough'.

And that's my own biggest issue with finding a great partner. There are some men who already gotten to this new level of being, but they're still few & far between.
Especially at my age it's difficult as many grow more rigid as they age. I think if you're younger it's easier as I see way more young people at this new level, or almost there, including younger men.