i think your trying to trick me cause every time i drink the girls all get prettier at closing time and my dates clothes fall off when drinking tequillia..good one though ty... .... ....

A guy was walking down the strsay eet and this hooker says to him,say do you wanna have a good time? Sure he says,and they head off to the nearest hotel. The hooker takes off all her clothes,but the guy just stands thier and keeps staring at her. She says,is this the first time you've seen any ***** since you crawled outta one? No the guy says,it's just the first time iv'e ever seen one big enough to crawl back into.

lol too funny ... keep em goin bro...

ohh thats so wrong , and heck i thought it was a woman doin no#2 till i reah the he part.But i shoulda known women dont #2 or fart , till you get MARRIED lmao........great one quarry keep it up..... ... .......

smart kid lol

ok cooley, since x mas is over now i can tell them all your bad habits ,and yes i sent ya the patches for your inflatable doll.lol funnin my bro, got your emails bud thanks....keep on rockin bro ttyl......................oh by the way the post was funny but the comments were better,he he...... to all

the outdated piks are bad enough, it's the stalkers i hate.you talk a few times and they wont stop bothering ya,sheesh.Then if ya complain they create a new profile i just block ,and block again.oh well nothing in this lifes perfect. I agree ed,that ya should have one updated pik atleast.

what zoo did ya work at jt?:bigsmile?...................................................................................................................................................................funnin ladies!!1

i did meet a different woman today, she read my electric meter. oh ive met her before,my bad

ROFLMAO,i knew the wet spot 1 but ty for the others im writing them down as i type

now if we could find the other 5 ..

John is in amsterdam and visits a nudist colony. While wandering around naked he spots a gorgeous blonde,immediately he gets an erection. The woman notices his erection,and comes over and says "sir did you call for me." She says,well it;s a rule here that if i give you an erection,it means you called for me.
She lays him down and starts making love to him. Later that day John visits the sauna,but as he sits down he lets out a fart. A big huge hairy guy gets up and drops his towel,to show a gigantic erection and says,"sir did you call for me? John replies,no!!! The guy says,it's a rule that when you fart,it implies that you did call for me.The man then knocks John to the floor,and has his way with him. As soon as the big guy finished,John ran back to his room,grabs all his things and scrambles for the exit. On his way out he's stopped by the manager,and he asks,can i help you? John says,heres my room key i'm leaving early. The manager asks why and John replies,i'm 60 years old, and i get an erection once a week, but i fart atleast 10 times a day.

HE HE COOLY TOUCHE..THATS LIKE HOW DO YA KNOW AWOMANS LYING,,,HER LIPS ARE MOVIN..CATRCH YA LATER COOLEY BRB

LOL COOLEY NOT A TOYOTA DONT RUN FOREST RUN BRO...

ta heck with walmart,time for them to start shopping at target and the blue light special stores need customers bad lol.. very nice one ty 4 sharing lmao

oh my quarry , you are a mean one, but i like how ya think tff,rotflmao

cheers quarry , you have us pegged... ...

hope no 1 gets offended it's all in jest merry chritmas

Twas the night before christmas and god it was neat,the kids were all gone and the wife was in heat. The doors were all bolted and the phone off the hook,i't was time for some nooky,by hook or by crook. Mama in her teddy and i in the nude,had just hit the bedroom,and reached for the lube. When out on the lawn thier arose such a cry,that i lost my boner,and poor mama went dry. Up to the window i sprang like an elf,tore back the shades,while she played with herself. The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built,showed a broom up his ass,buried to the hilt. When what to my wondering eyes should appear,but a rusty old sleigh,and 8 mangy reindeer. With a fat little driver,half outta his sled,a sock in his ear,a bra on his head. Sure as i'm speakin he was high as a kite,and he yelled at his team,but it didn't sound right. Whoa stupid,Whoa ****head,Whoa asshole,Whoa putz,either slow down this rig,or i'll cut off your nuts. Look out for the lamp post,and don't hit the tree,and quit shaking the sleigh,cause i gotta pee. They cleared the old lamp post,the tree got a rub,just as santa leaned out,and threw out my shrub. And the from the roof top we heard such a clatter,as each mangy reindeer emptied it's bladder. I was donning my coat to cover my ass,when down the chimney santa came with a crash. His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,he looked like a bum,he smelled like a whore. That was some brothel,he said with a smile,the reindeer are pooped,i'll just stay here awhile. He walked to the kitchen,himself poured a drink,he pulled out his pecker,and pissed in the sink. I started to laugh,my wife smiled with glee,the old boy was hung nearly down to his knee. Back in the den,santa reached for his sack,the toys were all gone,and some new things were all packed. The first thing he found,was a pair of false tits,the next was a hand gu,with a penis that spits. A box with condoms was santa's next find,and 6 pairs of panties,the edible kind. A bra with nipples,a penis extension,and several other things,i shouldn't even mention. A **** ring,a g string,and all kinds of oil,a dildo so long it lay in a coil. This stuff ain't for kids,mrs.santa will ****,so i'll leave it here,and then i'll just split. He filled every stocking and then took his leave,with one tiny butt plug,tucked under his sleeve. He sprang to his sleigh,but his feet were like lead,thus he fell on his ass,and broke wind instead. In time he was seated,and took the reins of his hitch,take me home **** head,this night been a *****! The sleigh was near gone,when we heard santa shout,the best thing about sex,is it never wears out.

We'll you coulda edited it to say men lol i'd of not taken offence after all it's supposed to be all in fun and not meant litterally or as a attack on those lovely ladies that keep us men smiling.but Ii think i will take the womans comment that she found it degrading and move on to another joke. Merry christmas all and happy holidays.