I think it has to do more with the people you are dating than with you. I feel the same as you... there is no rush to get to the serious stuff. It may be that the women you have been with are hearing their biological clock ticking and just want to get to the family part. Or it could be that they have been out o the dating game a while, too, and want to hold onto the first guy they can get their hands on.

I think all men secretly want the same kind of raomance that women do. They are just more guarded of heir emotions and their hearts. Like other posters have pointed out, men are conditioned not to show as much emotion as women, but that doesn't mean they don't have them. In my experience, when a man falls, he falls hard. Even within a committed relationship, men often wait for the woman's lead. They are feeling love and desire and passion, but they wait for the woman to say "I love you" first because we're the "emotional" ones. Oh, they don't mind initiating sex, but for all the "lovey dovey" stuff they let their woman set the pace. Let them loose and the flood gates open.

My boyfriend has been hurt before by someone he was deeply in love with and had spent 3 years with. Even though I could tell how much he loved me, I could also feel him holding back and protecting himself. On his birthday I wrote him a wonderful letter about what he means to me and how I feel about him. It was like a switch was flipped. Where before he reserved his "I love you" for special moments and every once in a while, he now tells me every day, sometime more than once. He hugs me tighter, buys me roses, and isn't afraid anymore to really let me know how he feels. It was all there the whole time, but he didn't let it all out until he felt safe to express it.

I would like to know what age you are referring to. I suppose in some cases of very young women around 18 that may be true. However, I think you are wrong on one key thing. Experience doesn't necessarily just come with time and age. I know plenty of "older" people in their 30s and 40s who have never traveled out of their home town, who don't make the effort to go out and date, who sit at home alone watching TV and typing on forums all day. Many people like that have little or no experience with what it means to live in the real world.

On the other hand, I know many people in their 20s who have experienced hard times and had to grow up fast, who have gone out on their own and made a place in the world, who have been hurt and learned from it, and who continue to put themselves out there instead of withdrawing away from the world like so many "older" people I know. I had already traveled to 13 countries in Europe (which I paid for by myself from working since age 15) and bought my own house by the time I was 19. That's more than many "older" people have done. I believe I am more an exception than a rule, but like another person who posted here, I know many other people my age who are very mature. Maybe some kids take handouts from their parents, but many more choose to strike out on their own, and still more have parents with nothing to hand out.

That being said, I can see both sides. Sometimes there are cases where younger women who are still in their teens get taken advantage of. This can be by older men or by men their age. The women who can't make their own decisions tend to get hurt and used no matter who they "hook up" with. In my opinion and experience (doubt it if you will), when two mature adults enter into a relationship it doesn't matter how much of an age difference there is. The problems only arise when one or both of them don't have a firm understading of what the relationship is r what to expect. Problems can happen in any relationship, and people can get hurt. That's the nature of them. Age difference is just one of the many compatibility factors that go into a relationship. It might not work for everyone, but sometimes it does and it's beautiful.

Curious is one thing... But if you are in a committed, exclusive relationship it shouldn't go any further. If you aren't happy with what you have or you still have questions about your sexuality, it's always better to not be attached to anyone.

This is speaking from the experience of a bisexual woman. If you're still looking around for something more, you haven't found what you want.

This is definitely true for my sister!!

After several months and an impromptu sleepover, my boyfriend told me I should keep some stuff at his place. I left several outfits, some shoes, etc. for those mornings when I woke up there and had to go to work. Then, about 9 months in when I went out of town for work, he stayed at my house to take care of my dogs. I came back to a ton of his stuff at my house because he had been doing laundry there. Now I've got most of his clothes in a drawer in my dresser. I really like having his stuff here, and it feels like this is a new "phase" in our relationship. Am I over-thinking this?

I'm sure they can, but they choose not to. They just see a warm body online and start sending stupid messages.

Only if it happens too fast! Get the timing right and we'll be yours forever.

What kind of things do you keep at your girlfriend/ boyfriend's house? At what point do you start leaving things? Do you ask or get invited, or leave something "accidentally" after a sleepover?

Those are all exceppent points! You have a way of summarizing things very well. And you are absolutely right about one important thing - Communicate! My boyfriend and I brought up that subject pretty early on. He has been burned before (as you said, there are legal ramifications of living with someone and when things go bad they can go very bad), so he will not be ready to move in with someone again until he is ready for marriage. Knowing things like that help us both to put the relationship and future in perspective.

My reply was just in general to his statement. I know that everyone finds their own truth. Yours is based on your experience and mine is based on the experiences I have had. I am totally okay with someone having their own opinions, especially when they can recognize it's not the only one.

Very good question... Especially for two independant adults. How do you decide who moves in with who? What happens if one or both of you have a mortgage? Moving in can be very complicated and it's a big committment. I don't really have any blanket answers. It really depends on your relationship.

I agree. :)

Well, thanks. :) I wasn't really looking to win or lose, I just like to speak up when I think differently. Anyways. Sorry to run out on everyone, but I lost track of time and had to go to class. Hope everyone's night is great!!

"My original post was a joking jab at the OP, in that he had to be stupid to want to go out with a child."

All you do is provie my points for me... So thanks. His age range did not include children, and you just said exactly what I was trying to prove-- Your insinuation is that all people who date much younger than themselves are stupid.

I believe it is you who needs to grow up.

Love it

I am only being as argumentative as you are. You say your opinion is based on the mentally unstable and sexual offenders. That might be your day-to-day reality, but it's not the overall reality of the world we live in. The probalem I have is with your generalizations of all people.

Your original post was a reply to a gentleman who said he wants to date someone younger. There was no mention of someone who is mentally unstable or handicapped. You now are trying to say your comments were only aimed at those with IQs under 90, but that wasn't the context of your original post. You were generalizing all men who date younger women as people of low intelligence who want someone with less experience. That is what I take issue with.

If you are going to go off on a completely different topic (i.e. discussing the mentally ill instead of the normal guy who dates younger), then start a new thread. What you are saying now sounds like back-peddling to me.

I don't know. I like to think I'm unique!!

Funny... you talk about not reading and suggest I ask questions when my last post started with "What kind of facts are they based on then?". You come back with only vauge, general statements and assume you know whether or not I was "objective." I think it may be you who is not.

Perfectly put!