I can't find any Report Abuse button. (or is that only available to the Gold Premium (or whatever they're called) members?)

I don't know what th best movie is, but I can't imagine why so many people claim that Transformers ('07) is the greatest movie of all time. :(

Being friends is great, but being forever filed away into the Just Friends Folder with EVERYONE you'll ever meet is bad. That's not worth escaping?

"find someone else that is more agreeable to you that can return your feelings and you'll be much happier."

And where exactly ARE they if you can't escape the Friends List?

I find it ridiculous how you're being presented with a raw deal, but nobody here is allowing you to feel justly frustrated by it.

How long was this fisherman trying before he initially quit?

Why are there so many stories of other fisherman suddenly being rewarded with the catch of the day when they finally throw their lines down and decide to head for home after a completely fruitless venture?

You should consider yourself lucky for getting THAT far, Shagna. :(

I get out enough. There STILL aren't anymore available women out there....

I'm sorry that you spent so much time pouring your little heart out while relating a frustratingly common problem, but nobody cares how hurt you've been or cares about CHANGING this problem not just for you, but for all of male-kind.

Hmm.... Maybe the young ladies I talk to will continue to talk to me if I look like a busty cartoon nurse too. *lol*

Basically what's going on, Hawaiigirl (who has a scary thumbnail... O_O), is that I'm trying to figure out why I can grab a young lady's attention and it seems like things are going absolutely wonderfully and then I don't get a single word out of her a few days later with no explanation whatsoever. It seems that the other users in here don't like how I have a rebuttal for everything that's said, and they're under the impression that it's THIS behavior that is turning women off (which isn't true, since the conversations that I share with my young lady friends never go into long, complicated debates on any topic like this conversation here). :P

"I was starting to think I was old fasioned in thinking this way, however all of these responses to the question have served to strengthen my beliefs. Thank you!!! N."
And thank YOU, MysticalMoon. While this response to my query isn't as constructive as I would have liked, it DOES give me a better idea of what's actually going on, which is what I've been after since posting this thread. This is the kind of advice/insight I want; the kind where I really have nothing to say but "oh, really? Huh. Never thought of that." Thanks. :)

"Like I said, Bob, you have an answer for everything. I rather imagine that's why people keep disappearing on you. Kind of annoying."
You came back for a whole TWO more replies after you said you were calling it quits. I like that. :) You still want to prove me and my theories/opinions wrong. Keep going! You can get there!

"Most people are in therapy beCAUse of their parents and perhaps it might help you as well."
Yes, and I DON'T want or feel the need to be in therapy because of the aid and council my parents provide. I don't fit into that group of folks. :P

"despite what you say, you're perfectly happy to stick with your mantra that you cannot find anyone, you will not find anyone who will continue to chat with you, and that's it. Because you reject everything. Everything!"
I do NOT! *lol* I'm perfectly happy to stick with my mantra because I'm doing what everyone says is the right thing to do. When trying to chat up a young lady who catches my attention, I'm being talkative, polite, a good listener, and am conveying a genuine sense of interest in the person. Tell me that's the wrong way to act and why.
I don't go into long debates like this with anyone I'm chatting up. If people can't continue the conversation with me in situations like this, I can't help it if they're unprepared enough to suddenly run out of things to say, can I?

"Maybe this is your hobby. To just keep wondering "why?" and "why me?" Well, why not you?"
Considering paradoxes is fun and all, but pondering why you constantly lose a game you've been playing for years while intimately knowing the rules (as best as people can relate them to you) is NOT fun.

"Your ideas about therapy, as other topics, are rather distorted."
Enlighten me, please. This is why we're here.

"What sort of film you are making? home versions?"
I don't know what "home versions" means since I'm not yet a Hollywood player and can ONLY operate out of my own home, but I make movies that are meant to be entertaining but not down-dumbing to a person's intelligence.

"Surely its the person they like or dont like, not the job they do ..."
Yeah, sure it is. Tell that to any guitarist.

"bobz - they're just "friskY" - lots of women like creative
guys..."
Alright, so where ARE they? :S In SoCal, you'd think the place would be SWARMING with them.

"Hmmm...what kind of movie-making are you talking about??"
Just movie-making in general. Making character-driven stories that people want to watch over and over.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-dBdXZl7IM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zks8Zr-O6hY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_jy7r4NyHc4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pX2gjpSNg7w
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCyOgzZgWeg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_7vZjqISSg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7N7FVSet6Jc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqd_W3x8wt4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KYFRx1_P74

"that quality alone should guarantee that sooner or later SOMEone is going to hang around and keep chatting with you"
Just not the people who say they can help me, I suppose...

"I think rather, he agreed with me that you're going to find fault with the newsletters anyway, one way or another so why bother?"
He's trying to sell some sort of relationship gospel, and he hasn't quit amidst a barrage of OTHER peoples' negative opinions. :P

"What women would that be, who like men who are rude and arrogant? I don't. And I don't think any other self-respecting woman does."
Most (if not all) of the self-respecting women here in SoCal who are in my age group have either decided that they don't NEED a man in their lives in order to be a complete human being (who then whine with their girlfriends every weekend about how dateless they are), or they've simply turned lesbian. The rest of the women here absolutely LOVE rudeness and arrogance. :S

As for therapy, I'll just turn to my parents if I need it. They are my absolute WORST critics. If they see something wrong with what I'm doing, they'll tell me straight away what the problem is and what could be done to fix it. Worse yet, they've got the leverage of parental pressure over me that the therapist simply will not have or ever be legally allowed to have. While perfectly supportive, they're very quick to tell me what's going wrong with me and my actions, which I'll forever love the both of them for. After another recent failed date proposal, my mother gently gave me the harsh possibility that maybe there ISN'T someone out there for everybody like everyone says. On the one hand it's incredibly depressing to hear this coming from one of my usually supportive parents, but on the other hand it was comforting in a weird way upon the reflection that with as knowledgeable as she is about my problem, there's really nothing that I'm doing wrong. If the two people who love me more than anything in the world and only want to see me successful in every aspect of my life can't figure out where I'm going wrong, you'll have to pardon my suspicions that a therapist who only has an hour or two a day to get to know me won't come to any real conclusion and my money and time will be completely wasted.

My friends keep bugging me to just pay the services for Match.com (and no one has STILL given me a real answer as to what I'd actually be buying there) so if I don't find anyone after 6 months, I'll get all my money back, no loss. To this I say "Alright, if you're so confident that I WILL find someone, why don't YOU pay for my Match.com account and then I'll very happily pay you back every single cent if I finally do meet my Missing Half?" I get no response out of them because THEY have just as little faith in the system as well and they don't want to blow their money away either.

Obviously women like musicians (as described on another thread in here), but do they like guys who express themselves in other media, I.E. film or video?

Familiarize yourself with the art of Mask Acting.

Many actors out there are afraid of damaging their appearance or reputation if they act over the top in a role. However, once you put them behind a mask or inside an elaborate makeup piece, they become psychologically invisible to themselves and they are free to run loose. Consider Tim Roth in Planet of the Apes (2001). Do you think he'd EVER act as crazy as General Thade in any other role where he just looks like Tim Roth?

What you need to do is find something for you to hide behind to help you get into practice of being the non-shy you like most actors become when mask acting. I used to be a pretty shy guy myself until I got myself an interesting, unusual pair of sunglasses. I wore those wherever I went and I eventually became psychologically invisible to myself, so I was free of the usual anxieties that prevented me from keeping myself on the normally social reservation leash. I'm now just as open with myself and everyone I meet without the glasses just as much as I was WITH them. You need to find yourself a mask to hide behind.

Psh... Child's play. Try being 22 and having only been on 3 dates your entire life that all end in disappointing failure. :P

The only advice I have to offer is that as the woman, you've already got most of the relationship leverage in your possession. I suggest you use it. Go out and don't be shy about looking for good, single guys. They LOVE it if the women are actually as aggressive as they.

"Because not all of them are (sexually attracted to you), or will be. And you can't "make" them be so."
This sounds like every piece of advice that a guy can have to make himself more sexually appealing (which assures them that they CAN make any woman attracted to them) is worthless if you can't naturally make women sexually attracted to you in the first place. Are you suggesting that some guys just have It while other guys don't and are completely lost?

"And it IS presumptuous to assume ANYone is attracted to you."
Alright. Given this suggested line of thinking, how does one retain the necessary confidence to expose to his fair lady friend(s) if he's under the assumption that no one will ever find him attractive? That sounds like playing Russian Roulette with a completely loaded clip to me.

"You're like Mr. One-Upper: "Oh yeah? You did that? Well, I did this." Again, another unattractive trait."
No, I'm like Mr. I'm-Doing-Things-That-Should-Work-But-Aren't-For-Some-Reason. They say I need to be a perfect gentleman, but women look right through me. They then say that I should be something of a jerk, which I try to do and they end up hating me. It's not about oneupmanship. It's about giving a clear enough picture as to what the exact problem is, and try to get more distinct advice about my own personal situation. I can't help it if my problem is so complex that people have no idea how to continue.

"Since you think the only women online are ones who are "desperate" or incapable of attracting a man's attention in real life, what on earth are you doing here?"
No, I said those on PAY sites appear desperate. There's a difference. You shouldn't have to pay for anything that you're supposed to be getting for free like most other people are getting anyway. Why are the women in here incapable of attracting men in real life? I don't know, nor do I care. If I can get a conversation out of them, they usually reveal themselves to be very nice, caring girls who anyone would consider themselves lucky to be with (and they more often than not find themselves in romantic predicaments not unlike my own, which I can sympathize with). THAT is why I am here, because there are women in the world who are wonderful people yet for some ungodly reason continue to fail with real life relationships, and since I share in their plight, I push myself forward under the belief that I am someone's Other Half, just waiting to be discovered and appreciated.

"you think you SHOULD be able to do this yourself, to attract a woman by yourself, but clearly you are incapable of doing so, so it seems to me you need and would be grateful for any help you can get."
You're again missing my point. I can and DO attract women in here. I just can't hang on to them, and no, it's NOT because I'm acting like a jerk like you're probably interpreting me now as you read this. (Many would suggest that it's my desire to NOT act like a jerk that may be hurting me.) I am indeed grateful for any help I can get. Lamentably, there's just not a lot I can use. People say I should Do This Action; yeah, I tried that several times but it didn't work, what else you got? How precisely would joining a pay site help my situation? What is it that they're offering me in ways of help that free sites or people I know in real life can't offer me?

"However, you're not, as you've proved time and time again in this thread. So, I hang my hat. I tried. Good luck to you, buddy."
This isn't trying, it's quitting. You may recall that one guy in here who offered to e-mail me with samples of his newsletters that he said might help me gain some insight to my own specific problem. HE'S not quitting on me (as far as I know). I said he could send them to me, and it's been nearly a week with no response from him. Either he's still looking through the (no doubt) vast archives of newsletters to see which could possibly fit to what I'm experiencing, or he found out that there is no advice in this series of newsletters that addresses the problem of being able to attract girls but not being able to hang onto them (I'm hoping it's the former and not the latter). If you have advice that you think is worth offering, what you're supposed to do is try to back me up into a wall to the point where I say "Wait a minute... you're right! Why didn't I see it before?? <:D". As incredulous as it sounds, this HAS happened. A friend of mine gave me the suggestion that I should try to meet women in larger groups instead of as individuals. This piece of advice was completely unheard of by me, and I had no alternative but to try it and see for myself (which I'm still waiting on, since the opportunity hasn't exactly opened itself up to me yet where there's a large group of young women who AREN'T with their beaus :P).

And don't tell me my failure comes out of me being rude, arrogant, or whatever. Women in the Real World LOVE that stuff. (The devil take my Golden Rule upbringing....)

"they TRY to impress"
The things I've done in life DO impress.

"they TRY to be funny"
I AM funny.

"they TRY to be interesting"
Few more interesting than I.

"they TRY too hard!"
What the hell does that even mean? Everyone says it, but they don't say HOW.

"instead of trying SO HARD, why not NOT try at all?"
That doesn't make any conceivable sense. If you want someone to say "hello" to you, the logical thing to do is to say "hello" first, so there's at least a 50-50 chance that the someone will say "hello" in return. If you want to meet girls and you don't try to meet them, what are you doing? Sitting back, being by yourself, and wasting time, that's what.
I've tried not trying. It was somehow even less successful than all my failed attempts at trying to try.

"This isnt a 'technique' or 'move' like some kind of strategy game"
It's not a technique or move, but you have to learn it, huh?

"If I was wrong about this lack of self value ie: self esteem and security; why do guys TRY SO HARD?"
Because attracting women has been one of the greatest conundrums to plague mankind ever since language was first developed and things got more complicated after you couldn't simply beat a woman over the head with a club and haul her into your cave.

"If they REALLY felt VALUE they would think "I am worthy AS I AM to get womens attention.""
That's exactly what I DO think, and I'm being accused of being a pretentious asshole because of it.

"problem is SO many guys have the WRONG concept of how to be attractive with women, this is what this guy teaches: HOW to BECOME (not memorize or learn techniques) the most attractive version of *YOURSELF*"
This guy has no idea who I am. What does he think he knows about *myself*?

"just because I have a bad opinion about something, it doesn't mean I want help in getting that opinion changed"

That should say it doesn't mean I DON'T want help in getting that opinion changed. Oops. :P