Pregnant psychos are the worst.... this one chick tried to take me to court for a paternity test claiming she got pregnant off something she downloaded from me... What a mess in Court! (j/k)....
I met someone here awhile ago while my fiance & I hit a break. The guy from here was sweet and we had a connection... but then he'd randomly up and disapear and talk to me the next day telling me "he forgot to tell me what he was doing"... I was like "If you ask me to meet you online at a certain time, you should be there."... anyway... he wanted to relocate here and play "daddy" to my kids and work and basically said we'd have a "dream life"... but the tradeoff was that he was going to move VERY far away from his kids... and I couldn't do that to his kids... No way. I tried to explain this to him... he called me a liar... said I wasn't real with what I had told him... and we haven't spoken since. I hate to be the heartbreaker... but one must take care of priorities first... KIDS ARE ALWAYS THE #1 PRIORITY.... It ended up working out for me anyway... my fiance and I have never been closer. LDR's are tough... especially when the other half is military. But they CAN and DO work out... and I have no intention of letting my sailor ever get away from me...

Welcome to JSH
I've lived in the Chicagoland area ALL of my life... I'm moving soon to Arizona... but you might like it here... there's tons to do... lots of free things through the Park Districts and Neighborhoods... some of the museums and tourist attractions offer free or discounted days... and you can get anywhere in Chicago on CTA (buses/trains) Good Luck & have fun!

(PS-The Chicago Boards Suck... no one really posts here...lol... it's like a ghost town! )

S1ow, my friend! )))))))))))HUGS((((((((( to you. How are ya?

Lady... you are awesome.
My kid is in perfect health. He's been tested for various things because my son's sperm donor had ADHD/ADD... he's being tempermental. He's being a kid...

I have none to give. I'm one of those insane
"cold turkey"... mind-over-matter people. You make up your mind and ya do it....

Course having children around and the desire to grow old enough to see my grandbabies helped motivate me... (my kids are only 4 and 7... I got awhile to go).

Good Luck!

I am the swiss army knife in my children's lives- I do it all!

It's not about what you GET in return...

How does giving make you feel?
And maybe, if you are feeling unappreciated by the people you are buying gifts for... perhaps make a donation to a charity in their honor... that way, your efforts will be appreciated by SOMEONE, even if the recipient is unappreciative.

Geek... you forgot to answer if there are any NORMAL GUYS and GIRLS THAT DON'T PLAY GAMES out there...

Come on, inquiring minds wanna know...

Oh, yeah... and why do people cheat too?

AMEN, Geek!!!!! Well Said!!!!

I am a sun-burnt butterfly flying against the wind determined to go where my heart already is.

So about 2 months ago, my grammar school best friend finds me on Facebook out of the blue. We haven't talked much... just sorta caught up with each other and now occasionally say hi or "check in"...

SO I have not seen this girl or talked to her for 15 years aside form the few short emails we exchanged. I sent out Christmas cards last week. (They took 4 weeks to get because I had them custom made with cartoons to look like my fiance, me and my kids... it was a template off this printing website we use at my job).

I mailed a card to my friend on Friday... I got one from her today...

IT WAS THE EXACT SAME CARD LAYOUT except her cartoons were of her and her cats. Is that not ODD?

15 years apart and we still think alike!

Sorry... just had to share my anecdote.

Anyone else have any odd stories like this?

I am getting nowhere with his current teacher (she is a sub) and lots of the parents have complained. The school is sugarcoating things... my kids doesn't get ABCDF... he gets GNME
G- Goal for improvement
N- Not Assessed this term
M- Meets expectations
E- Exceeds expectations

BU11 SH!T!!!
Call a spade a spade. Sometimes a kid NEEDS TO HEAR: "you're failing".... I'm a believer in "tough love"... sugarcoating the truth only makes theri wake-up call into the real world a more difficult transition.

I fear I have done all I can do until we move in February. I have already contacted schools in Arizona and I have a good feel for them. I am getting nowhere within the school my son currently attends and there are NO other public schools in my district (cannot afford private school).

I am taking him to this HUGE used book store on Saturday... We are going to spend the majority of the day there. He got a $30 gift card for the store from one of my friends for Christmas... he will be able to sit and read and at the end, buy whatever books he chooses. Maybe this will help? I dunno. But it couldn't hurt.

Thanks again, one & all...

I will PAVE the yard. I don't do yard work. I don't clean up after animals. Dishes, cooking.. cleaning... I'll deal. But while he's home and not underway- he gets to help with the chores. I will be working too. And military or not, the relationship will be a 50/50 effort. We've already agreed to that.

18????
Heck... I'm "older"... Damn.

Whipper snappers... ... and their labels.



<--------------is off to play canasta. Anyone seen my walker?

I wouldn't date you... (already taken)... but you seem like a cool enough person to hang out with. We probably have a lot in common with deadbeat exes and raising kids on our own... I like networking with other "single" parents... sometimes they are the best resource for advice and a shoulder to lean on... because they know what you're dealing with.

Future Navy Wife here... Love my guy... the uniform is a bonus. Miss him like hell right now... don't get to see him til March (when we get married). He's on a 30 days leave and then goes back to Guam til August... YEAH, I don't much like the fact that he'll be gone for so long... BUT it's a choice he made before we met, and I respect him for it. I'd rather have him some of the time than not at all. Clothes don't make the man, Military or Not... but it takes much patience and devotion to stay with a military guy. It's something that I don't think many people handle well. All I know is that I've been a single mom for a long time. I have raised my kids on my own, ran a household on my own. I can survive without a guy in my life and be okay... the deployments won't last forever... I plan to be around long after he gets out of the service... but in order to do that, I have to accept the here and now and make the best of it. Good Luck to you.

Actually, my son's father is a deadbeat with no interest in his life. (My ex-hubby). The Overseas guy is making every effort he can given the circumstances and it will be a little easier when there is a 2-parent household (we are going to all be together when he comes stateside this upcoming fall).
My son is a lot like me... can't learn til ya fall on your A$$.

Dad lives in the same apartment building I do. Different households, different rents, etc. I was having trouble finding a place- it's hard to be a single mom and find a landlord that wants to rent to you. The only reason I have this apartment is because my father (who has been a tenant for years) gave a good reference to the Landlord for me. Believe me, I'd LOVE to cut the apron strings... it isn't 100% possible just yet.

My son is in therapy... I've gone through a few therapists actually... my son won't talk to them He colors and draws and bull****s them. They are collecting a check... so who cares, right? My income is limited... I'd love to afford the best, but I simply cannot.

We are relocating to Arizona in February. We are going to stay with my in-laws until my fiance comes stateside. My mother-in-law home-schooled her kids. I will have my son in a regular school, but she is going to help me work with him after school. I'm thinking the change of pace for my son will be good. One can hope... nothing else has worked... maybe a change of environment will be beneficial... away from the negativity and my dad...

I appreciate the advice... Thanks.

I have a leappad... he hates it. I have a v-smile... he thinks it's for babies.
Computer... my computer won't run games well.. it freezes all the time. I am buying a new computer with my tax refund... but for now, don't have one that runs games well. I let him on PBS kids and the NIckelodeon Websites once in awhile... but hes lost interest.

And for the record... I do NOT punish for him not reading. I punish him for the attitude he gives me and the temperment. It is one thing for him to NOT read.... quite another to be disruptive and disrespectful over it.

I dunno. I'm hoping it's a phase he will grow out of. Generally speaking I will let him read anything he wants... but for school work, they make him read "age-appropriate" things. He was reading the Harry Potter books with me... we would count it as the 20 minutes required by his school. The teacher wrote me a not and stated it was unacceptable material because it was beyond his reading level and she felt I was covering up for my kid.

My kid is an over-achiever. He doesn't want books with pictures or large type. True, this stuff would be easier for him. He knows HOW to read... he jsut refuses to do it.

Urgh.... I dunno. Magic Tree House... he has 6 of the books... he read a few... didn't seem interested. He got into Captain Underpants... (weird)... but I'm going to see if I can find some more of the books for him for xmas.

Also- to hopefully improve his writing/reading, I made "letterhead" with his name on it, big enough lines so he had room to write... I bought him envelopes and postage stamps in Disney, Star Wars and Marvel Comic themes... and also "special pens" and an address book sp he can snail mail to out of state relatives... maybe writing will spark an interest... we'll see.

Again- thanks for all the suggestions. I do appreciate it.

2 months ago I took away ALL his video games and TV from his room. No luck.
Last month I cancelled the Cable TV... We don't have TV at all now because where I live we don't get reception for the regular channels.
I have even had to take away board games from this child.

Spanking? Yes. I've considered. And YES, I have... and my father, who lives downstairs from me has gotten the police involved accusing me of "beating" my child. Open hand on the butt- 2 or 3 swats? Hardly beating... there were no marks left. My son screamed bloody-murder... and embellished the tale. I've tried "time out" also- can't get the kid to sit or stand quietly... I make him stay anyway... but the screaming is unbearable and it gets dear old dad involved thinking I'm hitting the kid. (my parents abused us as kids, so he naturally thinks I am abusive and now he is trying to "break the cycle"...)

Oh, yes, I've had social workers knock on my door... courtesy of my bro in the Army (who isn't even around) Because I am apparently abusive and neglectful. Social workers found his accusation unfounded and BS...

So you see... I get hit from all angles. I am doing EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF. I even have him starting an after school reading program this week at his school.

My son does ALL his homework except for his reading. He will sometimes even sit there and PRETEND to read. I CANNOT be with him 24/7... I have to work to pay the bills. I do the best I can with what I am given. The child's room is bare, aside from Books, Art Supplies and school materials. (He needs to work on his writing... and I encourage ART as a way to develop his motor skills in controlling the pencils, etc.)

Rewards... yes. I beleive in non-monetary rewards. I will give verbal praise anytime he does his work. At the end of the week if he's done all his work, I will let him stay up late on Friday and pop popcorn and we watch movies. I will also revoke the board game restriction on weekends if he's completed his tasks. During the week, I read at least a half hour to my kids every night. If my son reads, however long he reads, I add that amount of time to the amount of time I read to him. Also- I implemented "family reading time"... where my son, my daighter and I are supposed to sit down for a 1/2 hour and do our own reading. My daughter is only 4... so she looks at her books and I will sometimes read to her other times I let her quietly look at the books and I do my own reading. The stories I read to my kids are picked by them... I am setting the best examples possible.

So, please... if there is something I am missing, enlighten me.
This isn't a case of being manipulated and it isn't a case of poor parenting. It's an issue of my son butting heads with me and being defiant. I am looking for creative solutions to getting results... something to make it fun or create interest for him... not lectures on how this is "bad parenting". Thank You.

2 months ago I took away ALL his video games and TV from his room. No luck.
Last month I cancelled the Cable TV... We don't have TV at all now because where I live we don't get reception for the regular channels.
I have even had to take away board games from this child.

Spanking? Yes. I've considered. And YES, I have... and my father, who lives downstairs from me has gotten the police involved accusing me of "beating" my child. Open hand on the butt- 2 or 3 swats? Hardly beating... there were no marks left. My son screamed bloody-murder... and embellished the tale. I've tried "time out" also- can't get the kid to sit or stand quietly... I make him stay anyway... but the screaming is unbearable and it gets dear old dad involved thinking I'm hitting the kid. (my parents abused us as kids, so he naturally thinks I am abusive and now he is trying to "break the cycle"...)

Oh, yes, I've had social workers knock on my door... courtesy of my bro in the Army (who isn't even around) Because I am apparently abusive and neglectful. Social workers found his accusation unfounded and BS...

So you see... I get hit from all angles. I am doing EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF. I even have him starting an after school reading program this week at his school.

My son does ALL his homework except for his reading. He will sometimes even sit there and PRETEND to read. I CANNOT be with him 24/7... I have to work to pay the bills. I do the best I can with what I am given. The child's room is bare, aside from Books, Art Supplies and school materials. (He needs to work on his writing... and I encourage ART as a way to develop his motor skills in controlling the pencils, etc.)

Rewards... yes. I beleive in non-monetary rewards. I will give verbal praise anytime he does his work. At the end of the week if he's done all his work, I will let him stay up late on Friday and pop popcorn and we watch movies. I will also revoke the board game restriction on weekends if he's completed his tasks. During the week, I read at least a half hour to my kids every night. If my son reads, however long he reads, I add that amount of time to the amount of time I read to him. Also- I implemented "family reading time"... where my son, my daighter and I are supposed to sit down for a 1/2 hour and do our own reading. My daughter is only 4... so she looks at her books and I will sometimes read to her other times I let her quietly look at the books and I do my own reading. The stories I read to my kids are picked by them... I am setting the best examples possible.

So, please... if there is something I am missing, enlighten me.
This isn't a case of being manipulated and it isn't a case of poor parently. It's an issue of my son butting heads with me and being defiant. I am looking for creative solutions to getting results... something to make it fun or create interest for him... not lectures on how this is "bad parenting". Thank You.