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Life's too short to wait on anyone. There's someone I cared about, but because he's too indecisive, I chose to move on and started dating again. If someone is truly interested, they will make time to be with you. :) YUP YUP, 
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Topic:
help im new in town
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welcome to Mingle
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Maybe someone in her family needs a kidney  it puts the lotion on the skin and rubs it in unless it gets the hose again.. as for being naive you dont know that until something happens and so now your a trained eye? If something was wrong, I'd likely know it let's put it that way, especially given we've spoken on the phone several times. "likely" "maybe" you would but its soo easy to hide your ill motive over a phone overly trusting perfect strangers can get you hurt and or killed its great that you think the world is so nice and safe tell that to my brother whos been fighting over seas where any minute he could die and there are people over here selling meth to kids! I never once said the world is nice and safe, I know very well that it's not, however at the same time we can't live in a bubble and be afraid of everything either, and not everyone has a ulterior motive in what they do or what they say. then tell ya what go get her pregnant go be with random strangers but sence you not allowed to do anything like dishes there may be a deeper reason why they want to keep you safe..im done Why is it assumed I'm gonna have sex with her if we meet? I'm not! And no there is no deeper reason, except for them being overcontrolling. Ok then why don't you get a job and move out, Why can you not get a drivers license, why are you not allowed to do laundry or dishes or cut the grass? Why do you stay there and let them control you? What is the reason for it? If it is so bad, what is stopping you? Honestly, I think this may be the breaking point, I'm tired of being told I can't do things, I want to prove to them I can, and maybe even to myself on some level too. see, your not even sure you can do it. your 21, is there any other reason why you cant legally leave home Do you know why I have problems believing in myself? I'll tell you why, it's not because I'm mentally retarded, or slow or whatever you want to call it. It's because for one thing, from both sides of my family at different times, I've been told oh you'll never do this, oh you can't do that, you got too big a gut, you're a tub, you know what you're doing is wrong, that your beliefs are wrong (even when it isn't that simple), etc etc etc. That stuff gets stuck in your head, to where it's all you see in yourself, you only see your failures, you only see the bad parts of you that need fixing either in your mind or someone elses. Now does that mean it's ok to keep going on living like that? No it doesn't, in the end we do make the choices of how we let our past effect us. But just the same it's not always easy to move forward when others around you keep bringing you back to what you're trying to get away from. In the end, it is up to you, if you are able, then do it. You will hear that all of you life if you just sit there and listen to it, do something about it and show them they are wrong. |
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Topic:
late night confessions
Edited by
John1932
on
Tue 08/04/09 03:02 AM
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I confess that some people ask for your opinions, but really don't want to hear them..
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Maybe someone in her family needs a kidney it puts the lotion on the skin and rubs it in unless it gets the hose again.. as for being naive you dont know that until something happens and so now your a trained eye? If something was wrong, I'd likely know it let's put it that way, especially given we've spoken on the phone several times. "likely" "maybe" you would but its soo easy to hide your ill motive over a phone overly trusting perfect strangers can get you hurt and or killed its great that you think the world is so nice and safe tell that to my brother whos been fighting over seas where any minute he could die and there are people over here selling meth to kids! I never once said the world is nice and safe, I know very well that it's not, however at the same time we can't live in a bubble and be afraid of everything either, and not everyone has a ulterior motive in what they do or what they say. then tell ya what go get her pregnant go be with random strangers but sence you not allowed to do anything like dishes there may be a deeper reason why they want to keep you safe..im done Why is it assumed I'm gonna have sex with her if we meet? I'm not! And no there is no deeper reason, except for them being overcontrolling. Ok then why don't you get a job and move out, Why can you not get a drivers license, why are you not allowed to do laundry or dishes or cut the grass? Why do you stay there and let them control you? What is the reason for it? If it is so bad, what is stopping you? Honestly, I think this may be the breaking point, I'm tired of being told I can't do things, I want to prove to them I can, and maybe even to myself on some level too. see, your not even sure you can do it. your 21, is there any other reason why you cant legally leave home |
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Maybe someone in her family needs a kidney it puts the lotion on the skin and rubs it in unless it gets the hose again.. as for being naive you dont know that until something happens and so now your a trained eye? If something was wrong, I'd likely know it let's put it that way, especially given we've spoken on the phone several times. "likely" "maybe" you would but its soo easy to hide your ill motive over a phone overly trusting perfect strangers can get you hurt and or killed its great that you think the world is so nice and safe tell that to my brother whos been fighting over seas where any minute he could die and there are people over here selling meth to kids! I never once said the world is nice and safe, I know very well that it's not, however at the same time we can't live in a bubble and be afraid of everything either, and not everyone has a ulterior motive in what they do or what they say. then tell ya what go get her pregnant go be with random strangers but sence you not allowed to do anything like dishes there may be a deeper reason why they want to keep you safe..im done Why is it assumed I'm gonna have sex with her if we meet? I'm not! And no there is no deeper reason, except for them being overcontrolling. Ok then why don't you get a job and move out, Why can you not get a drivers license, why are you not allowed to do laundry or dishes or cut the grass? Why do you stay there and let them control you? What is the reason for it? If it is so bad, what is stopping you? |
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I dont care what he does. the point is, he has no job, no car, no license to even drive a car, no money. right now he is depending on his family 100%.
If they say no, then what else can he do. If he is so able, then he can get a job, get a license, get a car , get a place to live and get laid in any way he wants too, or sees fit. No one can stop him. He asked for advice we gave it, we told him to go get her, after I found out his situation and his real circumstance, i turned back and changed my opinion. Now we are the bad guys... for what? giving our opinion. No thanks.... |
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O lord, you know most people go out younger on dates, and to dances, and with friends, and are on the road in their own cars. If he were deficent somehow, hed STILL have to live his damn life. If they dont wanna shell out some cash, they still should stay out of his business. hell be staying at her PARENTS for god sakes with permission. Alot of people his age have their own place, and go all kinds of places. Hell I have a retarded cousin who is married with a 2 grown kids. I mean come on.  ok yall can have this thread, Im done.. I gave my opinion Adam, what do you want to hear? Go get er big boy, knock her up and have a grand ole time, Do whatever you will. Im through with it... |
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well you asked if it was moving to fast and yes you are your family is doing this for your safety and because they care and really its it back to that 16 yrd old."even if her parents say no im going to see her anyway" you dont spend the night with a bunch of people you dont know its not safe and its not smart Look I know enough about this to know if I went I'd be ok, that they aren't gonna kill me or anything like that, but my family doesn't. so with no emergency money or a car or you family s support your putting ou life and safety in strangers hands that you dont know b,c you met a girl and sence assuming shes nice its ok?im guessing you havent paid somebody to do a background check on these people so you dont know if they are dangerous Why does everyone you meet online have to immediately be suspect? Not everyone is a predator or a perv. I repeat, NOT EVERYONE IS A PREDATOR OR A PERV. No one can be trusted on line, Not me or you or anyone, well we all know JT is a perv, but was knew.. lol I could be anybody, that picture doesnt mean a thing. On the internet, everyone is guilty until they are proved innocent. You have ot be careful of people like JT and...ummmmm and UHHHHHHHH  welll JT..... I don't like that whole guilty till proven innocent idea, it says that everyone has something to hide, and that isn't always the case. No it is not always the case, but it is always wise to find out first instead of finding out after you have a knife in your throat or a bullet in your head. No your right, everyone is not like that, but the sad thing is, we don't know who is and who isn't, so we have to be careful with all of them. |
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Edited by
John1932
on
Tue 08/04/09 01:43 AM
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well you asked if it was moving to fast and yes you are your family is doing this for your safety and because they care and really its it back to that 16 yrd old."even if her parents say no im going to see her anyway" you dont spend the night with a bunch of people you dont know its not safe and its not smart Look I know enough about this to know if I went I'd be ok, that they aren't gonna kill me or anything like that, but my family doesn't. so with no emergency money or a car or you family s support your putting ou life and safety in strangers hands that you dont know b,c you met a girl and sence assuming shes nice its ok?im guessing you havent paid somebody to do a background check on these people so you dont know if they are dangerous Why does everyone you meet online have to immediately be suspect? Not everyone is a predator or a perv. I repeat, NOT EVERYONE IS A PREDATOR OR A PERV. No one can be trusted on line, Not me or you or anyone, well we all know JT is a perv, but whats new.. lol I could be anybody, that picture doesn't mean a thing. On the internet, everyone is guilty until they are proved innocent. You have to be careful of people like JT and...ummmmm and UHHHHHHHH welll JT.....
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I know at first we encouraged you, but after we figured out your real story, we went back on it for your safety, if we didn't care, we would bother with it Adam. We are trying to help, if you don't want it, then don't ask....
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I think this plan is seriously flawed. Your instincts that this is too much to fast are right. At 21 I can not understanding a parent/grandparent saying you can not do something you want to do. If you live with them and they are supporting you it would not be wise to openly defy their wishes. What I understand even less is the parents of a 26 year old woman hosting a 21 year old stranger in their home. It sounds like either they see you as a meal ticket or they are trying to get their daughter to come back home from where ever she has been. Maybe living with and abusive boyfriend or husband. Way too many red flags on this play. Agreed!!!!! Adam, I think you should reconsider, if your family is strong enough, I am convinced that you will not be going anyway. I just want you to understand why they are interfering and not allowing you to do it. They love you, they know you better than we do, and they know what is best. Listen to them buddy, Ok.... Honestly I think they treat me like a freaking 5 year old protecting from me the world, NEWSFLASH: THEY CAN'T! I have to get out eventually, whether they like it or not. The more they push the more I resent them for doing that. Ahh, c'mon now, if you got out there and something happened to you, it would kill them, its a stranger you never met before and your going to another state to stay with her and her family, how do you know nothing will happen. Have you guys talked on the phone have you guys seen each others pictures. what if they are internet predators and they are trapping you? |
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I think this plan is seriously flawed. Your instincts that this is too much to fast are right. At 21 I can not understanding a parent/grandparent saying you can not do something you want to do. If you live with them and they are supporting you it would not be wise to openly defy their wishes. What I understand even less is the parents of a 26 year old woman hosting a 21 year old stranger in their home. It sounds like either they see you as a meal ticket or they are trying to get their daughter to come back home from where ever she has been. Maybe living with and abusive boyfriend or husband. Way too many red flags on this play. I'm not a kid though, and I resent being treated like I can't do a freakin thing for myself, or put down that I'm not good enough to do this or do that, why the hell not? As for the rest, the girl has lived alone in an apartment for a bit now, no real issue there, and the meal ticket thing I would think is unfounded to say the very least. No one said you cant do it for yourself, we are just saying listen to your family, they know what is best... |
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I think this plan is seriously flawed. Your instincts that this is too much to fast are right. At 21 I can not understanding a parent/grandparent saying you can not do something you want to do. If you live with them and they are supporting you it would not be wise to openly defy their wishes. What I understand even less is the parents of a 26 year old woman hosting a 21 year old stranger in their home. It sounds like either they see you as a meal ticket or they are trying to get their daughter to come back home from where ever she has been. Maybe living with and abusive boyfriend or husband. Way too many red flags on this play. Agreed!!!!! Adam, I think you should reconsider, if your family is strong enough, I am convinced that you will not be going anyway. I just want you to understand why they are interfering and not allowing you to do it. They love you, they know you better than we do, and they know what is best. Listen to them buddy, Ok.... |
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Edited by
John1932
on
Tue 08/04/09 12:53 AM
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I have no car, no license, and kinda stuck at the wishes of my family as far as getting to the bus station, as well as some of the funds for this trip (which I'd pay back). And agreed on respect, wouldn't do it any other way. Just unsure if this will all work out now......  WHOA WHOA, WHOA your horsey there a minute. you have no license, no car, no funds for a trip? no wonder your freaking out.. Man you gotta work on you before you can work on someone else. How are you going to work on a relationship if you have to ride a bus and borrow the money every time you want to go see her, you cant even get a ride to the station. Love is a powerful thing that will ruin you, if your not stable enough to have it. Maybe you should wait this one out. If your family helps you, that is good and all, heck if I was close enough I would give ya a ride to the station and give you funds, just cause I don't like to see good love go to waste, but you need to think long and hard about how you intend to maintain a relationship if you don't have the means to even get to the relationship. I understand all that, and I do have some of the funds for this bus trip, just not all of it. The bus is cheaper then flying to Minnesota to be sure, so if I didn't go now wouldn't be able to see her for a while to say the least. I do admit I got things to work on too with a license and all. Ok, that's enough, Im beginning to understand a little more. Adam, your family is trying to look out for you just like Calleigh was trying to tell you earlier. They worry for your safety and well being, you may be 21, but they feel you still need their protection. I know you really want to see this girl and I know you want to be a man and you want to do it alone, but they feel like you aren't ready. listen to your family. I didn't see the entire picture until just now and I understand. If something happened to you, we would feel horrible for encouraging you. I know it is sad and depressing and hurtful, but your family knows best. Its not time yet. There will be more times, keep talking and make some money and things will grow between you two. Be smart, be safe... Good Luck |
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I have no car, no license, and kinda stuck at the wishes of my family as far as getting to the bus station, as well as some of the funds for this trip (which I'd pay back). And agreed on respect, wouldn't do it any other way. Just unsure if this will all work out now...... WHOA WHOA, WHOA your horsey there a minute. you have no license, no car, no funds for a trip? no wonder your freaking out.. Man you gotta work on you before you can work on someone else. How are you going to work on a relationship if you have to ride a bus and borrow the money every time you want to go see her, you cant even get a ride to the station. Love is a powerful thing that will ruin you, if your not stable enough to have it. Maybe you should wait this one out. If your family helps you, that is good and all, heck if I was close enough I would give ya a ride to the station and give you funds, just cause I don't like to see good love go to waste, but you need to think long and hard about how you intend to maintain a relationship if you don't have the means to even get to the relationship. |
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Go and meet her and have lots of lots of sex with her... just bring the condoms. Ya never know. AND if she lived down the street it would be rediculous to hesitate, so why do it now? You only live once, go have some excitement. (you dont really have to sleep with her) yes you do. No sex lol, we've talked a little bit about that issue casually (meaning not her and I in that light), and she wouldn't be comfortable with it I wouldn't think nor would I. Besides her parents would probably go crazy if we did. Either way it's not gonna happen like that if I do go. There is no if's. YOUR GONNA GET ON THAT BUS AND YOUR GONNA GO SEE THAT GIRL. no back talking... lol Do wants in your heart, don't let fear of he trip freak you out, now if it s a fear of the situation, then you better be minding your gut, but if it is fear of the trip, swallow it and get moving. |
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So few nights ago, I looked at a profile and then found that the person who I looked at decided to add me as a friend. Figuring why not, I decided to accept, and we talked briefly. Next night, we ended up on the phone and online chatting basically all night and into the morning, and talked some yesterday too. Now at this point we're more or less just friends, but I had found out she was traveling into the Cleveland, Ohio area today to visit family, and Cleveland is just a couple hours away from me being just outside of Detroit in the suburbs. So I had come up with the idea that maybe we meet for a day or two while she's home. She didn't mind the idea (although my family has), and we've been trying to work out me getting there and all by bus since. Today though I've been having some second thoughts, I mean I do want to see her and I know she wants to see me, to see just how things transfer from over the phone/online chat to real life meeting, especially considering she won't be in the area again for a while considering the costs to travel from where she lives, and not having a whole lot in the way of funds. The same could be said for me traveling to where she is. But at the same time, I wonder if this is too soon, if the timing isn't right and by meeting we're sort of rushing this, or is it possible to rush a real life meeting in the first place? Thoughts? UHHHH!!!!, I know its none of my business, but I was curious... What happened to the 16 year old girl you were in love with last week on the other thread you made about if age mattered, is this the same or different. I was just curious cause you said her parents was letting you stay the night with them and your parents are saying heck no!!! This is someone different, not to say I've forgotten about the 16 year old mind you, just trying to keep my mind open at the same time, though perhaps that's a recipe for trouble too. You should open your mind further and push the 16 year out of it.. just my opinion.. but thats  Ok, well you know I have to ask, and you knew it had to be coming, so here it is... How old is the new girl visiting Ohio? you don't have to answer, but I'm sure inquiring minds what to know. She's 26, so a little older then me. I'm not totally sure if this will work though, the bus routes and all just to get to the station are more confusing then I first thought, and not exactly familiar with some of them not having used them. I had figured I could take the one bus near me straight downtown to the station, like I had done with going to see the Tigers play last summer, but from google maps at least, it's a little more complicated apparently. Don't have a printer to print out info from either. I wish I had more time to get this sorted out, so soon and all it makes it hard to pull this off, and I probably will wonder what would have happened if I don't go, though then again there may be a reason I don't too I don't know. YESSSSSS!!!!, our young man has grown up. GO SEE HER, do you not have car so you can drive yourself? Ahhh it don't matter, go see the girl. If it was me, and i was off work, I would be gone with the wind brother. Of course I would get me a hotel, don't think I would be staying with her parents lol. NOOOO SEX MAN, NOT WITH HER PARENTS THERE... Get to know her, talk to her, don't just hide the salami and run, that's no way to treat a lady. You want respect, give her respect. Good Luck. |
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Topic:
This SUCKS!
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Its good all is going well, good luck on that job, and keep the road rage to a minimum.
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So few nights ago, I looked at a profile and then found that the person who I looked at decided to add me as a friend. Figuring why not, I decided to accept, and we talked briefly. Next night, we ended up on the phone and online chatting basically all night and into the morning, and talked some yesterday too. Now at this point we're more or less just friends, but I had found out she was traveling into the Cleveland, Ohio area today to visit family, and Cleveland is just a couple hours away from me being just outside of Detroit in the suburbs. So I had come up with the idea that maybe we meet for a day or two while she's home. She didn't mind the idea (although my family has), and we've been trying to work out me getting there and all by bus since. Today though I've been having some second thoughts, I mean I do want to see her and I know she wants to see me, to see just how things transfer from over the phone/online chat to real life meeting, especially considering she won't be in the area again for a while considering the costs to travel from where she lives, and not having a whole lot in the way of funds. The same could be said for me traveling to where she is. But at the same time, I wonder if this is too soon, if the timing isn't right and by meeting we're sort of rushing this, or is it possible to rush a real life meeting in the first place? Thoughts? UHHHH!!!!, I know its none of my business, but I was curious... What happened to the 16 year old girl you were in love with last week on the other thread you made about if age mattered, is this the same or different. I was just curious cause you said her parents was letting you stay the night with them and your parents are saying heck no!!! This is someone different, not to say I've forgotten about the 16 year old mind you, just trying to keep my mind open at the same time, though perhaps that's a recipe for trouble too. You should open your mind further and push the 16 year out of it.. just my opinion.. but thats Ok, well you know I have to ask, and you knew it had to be coming, so here it is... How old is the new girl visiting Ohio? you don't have to answer, but I'm sure inquiring minds what to know. |
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