If neither person in a friendship makes the first move to forge a romantic bond with each other withiñ a certain time frame, do you think the people are forever confined to the friend zone?

Or do you think that once both frirnds remain single, there is always possibility for romance between.them?

I do not think so

Hi

Does your answer refer to my first questiom ? Or my second? Lol

I don't believe absolutes.
I LOVE friends!
I believe in PASSION!

Yes Peggy, we are past that romantic deadline, we are forever destined to be just friends....



On the serious side, I don't think there are deadlines. I know several couples that were just friends for several years then things clicked and they realized they had many things in common and it turned into something romantic. Sometimes it's just the timing is not right and it needs a little more time to bloom.

I avoid people who have agendas for relationships.

I too have friends that were just friends for years, each had relationships with other people, then one day "poof" they connected one night and now they are engaged.
If it's meant to be, then love finds away.

... And sometimes the two merge. Well said Pastor Beach!

Likewise Reverend Peg!

Are you publicly terminating our impending engagement 2em?

I.also know couples like the one you described but I also know of more couples where one person has more feelings than the other or they are not feeling similar feelings at the same time , leading to an awkward impasse between them. What are your thoughts about that?

Thats a good point motown but I wonder if its possible for people to deepen their ties with others without having an agenda at some point , even if the agenda is for them to remain warm acquaintances .

I wonder if people just choose not to vocalise their agendas. (Playing the devil"s advocate here)

Adore me, or else

Of course. All relationships start out as casual acquaintances then move on to friendships and then maybe even deeper friendships.

Most people don't vocalize their relationship agendas. And some, I suppose, aren't even aware they have them, or will flatly deny that they do. But spend some time with them and a person can usually figure it out.

... sure why can't two friends fall in love... a lot of times it's just a matter of looking at each other through different glasses so to speak...
We normally don't look at or friends in a romantic sexual way...
But if you do that and you do find yourself falling in love with them then great... Love Is Love no matter where you find it

Time's a tickin!

#1 - I don't think there is a time frame for people to fall in love. Sometimes though, one falls in love before the other realizes it and would not say anything afraid of jeopardizing the friendship. And once they are both on the same page BOOM. That's why I won't fall for guys whose best friend is a woman.. that could happen.

#2 - my dear Peggy, there is always a possibility for romance.

Yes and no and maybe.

The more you enjoy the "friend zone" the more momentum it has to remain so.
The amount of energy and relearning a new relationship and therefore new relationship communication skills will make it 10,000 times harder to try and "turn" a long term "friendship" into an actual romantically bonded relationship in comparison with someone new.
Like when a kids parents divorce and one moves out, or a single parent gets remarried and the kid has to switch from seeing them as "mom's friend bob" to "dad bob."
At some point alternatives are a more attractive and viable option than the effort to try to change the relationship.

There's a biological process involved from first attraction to romantic pair bonded love. If you deny it, veto it, stop it from forming as it's naturally trying to go forward you have to work harder to keep it from influencing your behavior, thoughts, and emotions. That means developing kinda negative and controlling emotional associations to offset the positive and accepting associations, cancel positive with negative to remain neutral. And at some point negative will outweigh the positive. After puberty it's part of the biological imperative to go forth and mate.
Negative emotions against the status quo are to motivate you to move on and find someone that you will choose.
"Familiarity breeds contempt."
People tend to swallow that down behind their social facade, in order to be a "good friend," and can end up compartmentalizing their relationship to avoid looking at what's really motivating them.

"Friend" is such a vague way to describe a relationship it can encompass a wide range of emotional attachment.
Lots of people play the "friends first" game when it is really "I don't want to deal with the scary adult emotions and conversations. So my conscious self is going to deal with the 'friendship' relationship, keep it at a distance, keep it on the surface and relatively shallow and knowable, while more deep down emotionally and subconsciously it's going to progress normally along the lines of a romantic relationship, and I'm going to react more emotionally and rationalize logically, and ultimately back my way into a romantic relationship, and when it becomes obvious I can say it's my decision and feel in control."

So yes, no, and maybe. Depends on the people involved, depends on why they're getting into a "friendship" and what they get out of the "friendship."



"Romance" and "love" can occur between any two people with any sexual attraction.
The longer you're single the better seeming the ones you've already eliminated.

Was kinda waiting till a few more people commented.
I guess I can add my 2 cents.

If I enter into a friendship with the intention of an intimate relationship then yes, there is a deadline.

If we become friends and our relationship grows to a point where we want to be intimate then no, there is no deadline.

I think it all depends upon the intentions from the beginning.

A Reread of the OP makes me think I didn't address the intended questions well enough.

Ah, more thought needed.



No. I don't believe there is a time frame to establishing love. Thats pretty shallow isn't it? The only way that could play a part is if one is horny and the other isn't. One may keep a friendship with the hope of intimacy eventually but as time goes on that friendship will be tested with desire. So is it really friendship?


Assuming that the friendship is not enduring as a chance for intimacy a lasting friendship can certainly become intimate. Nobody likes to be manipulated. However, as the frienship relationship grows in familiarity intimacy can grow.

Things like this can not be quantified into a rule of life. Perhaps living n the moment and learning to accept others as they are to you can help with clarification. Sometimes we fail to see what is right in front of us.