Chess???????????Takers???

ya know, its funny. I don't lie, cheat, beat, hit, smack, play games, and I am drama free. I hate all that crap, and I live my life without all those things. BUT I still can't find "the one". I did hear something lastnight that make me laugh... I was told that I am intimidating (sp?) looking. and that I have a look on my face that I am unapproachable (sp?). More then just a few ppl said that, and then I started to notice as I walked around. People would look lost at my hospital, and look right at me, but they would never, ever say anything to me. Come on, I am just a big cuddly bunny.

People will judge you by the way you carry yourself sometimes, maybe it is you don't smile and look serious, or you maybe there is a defensive gesture or mannerism you have that you don’t notice that they may see as an intimidation, or it could be you are so comfortable being you that intimidates people has you know who you are and you are not afraid to be you. I do not really know you so it is hard to say just a thought I am no expert.

Maybe I am just to confident, who knows. I do know, however, when I do open my mouth to talk to someone, they never leave me alone! The people in the lab ask me all the time, "why does everyone follow you and look for you all the time just to be around you"? I am like, well maybe cuz I remember the small things people tell me and then when I see them again, I ask them about it. So, it shows them I care. AND yes, I am a very caring person. SO don't judge someone by their cover.

Yes

I don't think they intend to play games. A lot of women don't realize that men have been hurt too in the past and it is my personal belief that they don't realize they are playing games, they are on a subconscious level trying to protect themselves from being hurt. Let me tell you a story about myself. I met someone on here who is wonderful. We talked for hours via IM and on the phone. Having recently left a horrible relationship myself, I found myself not trusting him even though I was falling for him. An oxymoron, I know. LOL The more we talked the harder I fell for him however I could not get the past out of my head and I had to know if he was lying. I thought it seemed too good to be true. Me and this guy had become myspace friends as well and I proceeded to create a fake myspace profile to talk to him and find out how sincere he truly is. Eventually I had to tell him the truth. I'm not the kind of person that lies or plays games. I didn't even realize how much my past had effected me until I had done this. He won't talk to me anymore because of my actions and I don't blame him. The moral of the story is that sometimes people don't intend to play games, they are just scared of what might come. If you find someone playing games, don't give up on them, talk to them about why they felt they had to play the game and you might be surprised to the insight you receive. However don't be fooled, there are some people that thrive on drama. It's up to you to figure out who is who. Good Luck!

I'd have to say I'm with Dugger, I would bend over backwards to do anything I possibly can for someone I'm into. However, in the end I usually end up either just being the good friend they don't wanna lose due to a relationship gone wrong, or I just get s**t on.

As for what Monique said, I'd have to agree with giving second chances, because no one is perfect. Different people make mistakes in different ways and and alot of times they arn't given second chances when they really should have been. Sometimes people even know their flaws but it's hard for them to control it, like me. One of my biggest problems is I get really passionate and into someone I'm talking to really fast, and I end up scaring them off.

however, to answer the OPs question, there are guys out there that don't play games. I don't THINK I play games. If I do, it's not intentionally. I've been hurt several times in the past, and really some people would change from that and maybe be more distant and thick skinned so they don't get hurt again as easy, but for me I guess I'm to soft and leave myself open to be hurt.

I just can't believe ppl continue to bash genders for this crap..We all go thru it, It's not one gender's fault anymore than the others.
xoxoPeaches.

CLAP CLAP CLAP

totally agree with peaches there.
why go round and round

turn around,smile and start flirting people!!

no one gender plays games anymore than the other!

even by saying "i'm not gonna play these games" or if you accuse the other of playing games, that in itself is playing games!! you are making yourself the victim of this "gameplaying" which is you putting yourself above the other person in your head - that is you playing the game back!!!

if you think someone is playing games with you, just let it go! if you are standing at one end of the tennis court with a racket in your hand and someone else is at the other hitting a ball to you, just let the ball go past you!! don't hit it back! (i like my analogies and metaphors can you tell? lol)

Monique! That was a very honest and intelligent reply!!
I'm sorry to hear about your experience. I can see how
easily that could happen and it really raises a lot of
interesting issues. Welcome to jsh btw - I hope that you
are able to easily work around that bump in the road...
I think it can be extraordinarily difficult to trust at
times.

Trust....that word no longer exsists for me. Now I feel as if I can never let my guard down...because the minute I do, I wind up getting HURT....again.

I agree both men and women play games, finding one's that don't are RARE

Everyone regardless of genders can play games from time to time. I think for some..it is their internal head games on themselves that produce what appears to be games on the other person.

I would advise geting to know someone through friendship before starting a relationship w/them. See how they react around others. People nowadays are too flighty. I am a good guy & I usually stay in the relationship the longest & try to mend the broken fences. You have to want the same stuff as the other person. Try to find out as much as you can about them before things get seriuos, cause once stuff turns serious, well that is when people feel hurt when things go sour. Good bless you and keep looking on. People need to be kinder to one and all. We are not here for long anyway. Peace, love & happiness to all.

I dont have time to read all couple hundred posts but sure we are here, hun. We just don't stand out from the crowd because that would be against what makes us that way. Does that make sense?

What I mean is next time give a guy a try who seems a little different, not weird, but different. The reason they seem different is because they are.

Good luck

i play video games
does this count?
^_^

If there were no games there would be no fun and everyone would be serious. With that said, why do women play games? What is considered a game? Would this example be one? The mad decides to date two ladies, because A is making him wait for what B is giving all the time. Now that A has decided to give it up, after all this time, he has in fact fell in love with B and now A feels used. The moral is do your man, follow your own mind not some stupid trend, or magazine advice and you won't lose your man to the cleanup woman. It's crazy to me to hear one sex say the other is playing GAMES when BOTH are playing games. It's chess baby, who will win and play the game fair. No tire stabbing, window breaking, etc.. take your defeat gracefully. Hope that helps.

DON'T PLAY GAMES WITH THEM AND LET THEM PLAY WITH THEMSELVES

OPPS DID I SAY THAT OUT LOUD?

why do u think i'm still single...dating sux!!!!!

THERE ARE MEN WHO DON'T.