Topic: independent ladies
no photo
Thu 07/21/11 03:22 PM



in answering this i think we need to ask vi question why a woman feels she needs to be independent? it may be her nature, or that she has been forced by certain circumstance(s) to be that way which may affect the way she handles her relationship with potential spouses unless she happens to meet a very patient and perceptive person who would be understanding and tolerant to the kind of person she is till things sufficiently weld together enough for stability and continuity.


I guess I would ask why someone feels the need to not be independent, rather than the other way around.



I dont feel a need to be 'independent'. I do feel the need to learn to adapt to changing environments and situations though. Sometimes those situations will allow me to 'depend' on others for some things,, and sometimes they wont.


And that's your choice. Nothing wrong with that.

navygirl's photo
Thu 07/21/11 03:35 PM



in answering this i think we need to ask vi question why a woman feels she needs to be independent? it may be her nature, or that she has been forced by certain circumstance(s) to be that way which may affect the way she handles her relationship with potential spouses unless she happens to meet a very patient and perceptive person who would be understanding and tolerant to the kind of person she is till things sufficiently weld together enough for stability and continuity.


I guess I would ask why someone feels the need to not be independent, rather than the other way around.



I dont feel a need to be 'independent'. I do feel the need to learn to adapt to changing environments and situations though. Sometimes those situations will allow me to 'depend' on others for some things,, and sometimes they wont.


Thinking back; I became independent out of necessity not necessarily having the need. Bottom line is we all have to be comfortable with our choices.

no photo
Thu 07/21/11 03:41 PM
Everybody needs someone. But don't put all your eggs in one basket as they say. tongue2

Always have a plan B.

or C.


no photo
Thu 07/21/11 03:44 PM
I absolutely need people around. I like spending time with others. I like being around others. But, I don't expect them to do everything for me.

msharmony's photo
Thu 07/21/11 03:45 PM

Everybody needs someone. But don't put all your eggs in one basket as they say. tongue2

Always have a plan B.

or C.





exactly,,,

navygirl's photo
Thu 07/21/11 03:46 PM

Everybody needs someone. But don't put all your eggs in one basket as they say. tongue2

Always have a plan B.

or C.



Yep, recently I have had two dear friends finally give me some help with my home renos after tackling it alone for 14 years and I must admit it is nice to have an extra pair of hands as well as the close friendships that I have with them.

no photo
Tue 07/26/11 01:01 PM










women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife

those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own'




Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY grumble


Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them.



who has one 'stand alone' identity?

we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own.

I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other.

An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other.

A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation.


I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay.

It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working...

LOL this is funny to me.



finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually

all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,,


if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped'

,,,same dilemmas either way


no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,,


LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man

That is too funny too.


Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO
YES NAVYGIRL IS A WONDER WOMAN............


Nope, I am Xena. laugh
drool drool drool drool drool flowers flowers flowers flowers flowers smitten smitten smitten smitten :banana: :banana: :banana: drool drool drool flowers flowers smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten drool drool flowers flowers :banana: :banana: smitten drinks drinks drinks drinks drinks drinks

no photo
Tue 07/26/11 01:05 PM
This thread is still going? laugh

no photo
Tue 07/26/11 01:11 PM

This thread is still going? laugh
YOUR SEXY TOO..........drool drool flowers flowers flowers flowers smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten drool drool flowers flowers

navygirl's photo
Wed 07/27/11 09:00 PM











women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife

those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own'




Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY grumble


Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them.



who has one 'stand alone' identity?

we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own.

I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other.

An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other.

A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation.


I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay.

It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working...

LOL this is funny to me.



finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually

all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,,


if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped'

,,,same dilemmas either way


no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,,


LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man

That is too funny too.


Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO
YES NAVYGIRL IS A WONDER WOMAN............


Nope, I am Xena. laugh
drool drool drool drool drool flowers flowers flowers flowers flowers smitten smitten smitten smitten :banana: :banana: :banana: drool drool drool flowers flowers smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten smitten drool drool flowers flowers :banana: :banana: smitten drinks drinks drinks drinks drinks drinks


Really I am Xena. Check out my profile pics. :smile:

no photo
Thu 07/28/11 03:00 PM

Why so many independent women are single ? is it because they choose to be or are they simply struggling to find love ?
IM READY FOR ONE......SO COME A GET ME..............LOL

msharmony's photo
Thu 07/28/11 03:09 PM








women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife

those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own'




Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY grumble


Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them.



who has one 'stand alone' identity?

we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own.

I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other.

An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other.

A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation.


I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay.

It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working...

LOL this is funny to me.



finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually

all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,,


if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped'

,,,same dilemmas either way


no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,,


LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man

That is too funny too.


Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO



its also easier to walk away from a BAD job if you have a partner who earns enough to pick up the difference,,,

just saying, independence comes in many ways besides financial,,,,

no photo
Thu 07/28/11 03:11 PM









women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife

those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own'




Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY grumble


Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them.



who has one 'stand alone' identity?

we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own.

I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other.

An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other.

A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation.


I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay.

It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working...

LOL this is funny to me.



finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually

all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,,


if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped'

,,,same dilemmas either way


no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,,


LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man

That is too funny too.


Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO



its also easier to walk away from a BAD job if you have a partner who earns enough to pick up the difference,,,

just saying, independence comes in many ways besides financial,,,,
OK I AGREE............

RainbowTrout's photo
Thu 07/28/11 04:27 PM
A man of quality is not intimidated by a woman of equality. I learned this in studying Feminism. It makes a lot of sense to me. It is a maturing of the self and helps to promote a live and live policy.:smile:

winterblue56's photo
Fri 07/29/11 09:40 PM

A man of quality is not intimidated by a woman of equality. I learned this in studying Feminism. It makes a lot of sense to me. It is a maturing of the self and helps to promote a live and live policy.:smile:


very wise words

wux's photo
Fri 07/29/11 10:29 PM

A man of quality is not intimidated by a woman of equality. I learned this in studying Feminism. It makes a lot of sense to me. It is a maturing of the self and helps to promote a live and live policy.:smile:

It takes one to know one, and sex has nothing to do with it.

Unless the quality is "they had one thing in common, they were both good in bed." Sex IS important in the fast lane.

Shridharbm's photo
Sat 07/30/11 10:26 AM
Its all about girls who not get as there expected freedom wit boy's:-).:) hence they want to be independent. But they really dont know how much we love them at all time much more than ourselves.

navygirl's photo
Sun 07/31/11 12:04 AM

A man of quality is not intimidated by a woman of equality. I learned this in studying Feminism. It makes a lot of sense to me. It is a maturing of the self and helps to promote a live and live policy.:smile:


:thumbsup:

youaretoofunny's photo
Sun 07/31/11 12:14 AM
Independence can come either way either by choice or by force.
By choice they think that being with another person they can get hurt by sharing their thoughts,ideas, and maybe even there heart with others.

By force in my book is when a person, place or object of control is in power preventing this person from even experiencing love in the first place.

no photo
Sun 07/31/11 10:15 AM
I reunited with my high school ex, cos my mum set it up. I didn't ask her to. I made no sign that i missed him. I actually really didn't miss him. I didn't find myself ever thinking about him anymore. Maybe cos i knew all along what a bad person he was, and that put me off ever wanting to be around him ever again. How could i trust him anymore? Sure enough, when HE (Chris B) turned up at my house, one sunday, in 2008 at xmas, he had a hard enough time convincing me he'd be any different. The funny thing was how my mum didn't batter an eyelid about it. Very callous, that. Maybe i'm just ranting on, but i wouldn't ever do that to MY daughter or son. And seeing as my mum and Chris failed to keep up their encouraging scheme/delusional plan, it failed right back at em.