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| Topic: independent ladies | |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY  Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? Actually I do have "stand alone" identity. I renovated my house, paid my own bills, went through unemployment, and even a bout of depression. I had no family, friends, employers, or counselors to lean on or turn to. So, yes I did stand completely alone. Ont he other hand; my mom couldn't even go to my neighbor to ask for help as she simply didn't know how to do this. My dad made her feel like she was nothing but a complete waste of space. She had no survival extinct and let my dad abuse all of us. If only she had the knowledge that women do now; I think her life and ours would have been a heck of a lot better. and many like you who have noone to turn to are likewise 'independent' and 'stand alone' personalities even if they have no 'income' most who claim those women are not 'independent' are fortunate enough to have resources and people that they take for granted as part of their 'identity' HUH? So you are saying that she stood alone with no income? And that women who claim to be independent are taking their support system for granted as dependence?  no. Im stating that independent is a characteristic, that is not dependent upon income. For instance, one can be working a job that is in an at will state , living paycheck to paycheck, perceived as 'independent' because (this week) they can pay their own bills another one can be a stay at home mom whose HUSBAND is working,, whose bills are not JUST her bills, and who has a reliable partner who pays the bils (for this week) , but yet is not considered independent ,, both women have the bills paid,, why would either be considered less 'independent'? just because that situaiton might change and put them in hard times? that situation 'might' change for either woman,, my point is, they both made decisions about how to take care of their needs(and possibly their children) which were wise and which work for them,, so they are both INDEPENDENT in character,,, and yes, many self proclaimed 'independent' woman also have support systems which they take for granted or ignore when they claim to be so 'independent' many of these women have families to turn to, or friends, or other types of assistance (disability, ss, child support)that help them, yet put down women who have a husband that provides to enable them to stay home with their children or they put down women who have to turn to 'government' assistance support systems come in many forms and I just tire of seeing one persons system held up above another's,,, everybody needs help sometimes and not everybody should have to do it 'all by themself' to be considered independent,,,,they should just be capable of doing so WHEN NEEDED.... Sometimes; we simply don't have that support system in place and not necessarily something that is ignored or taken for granted. Trust me; I did try and seek support but none was to be found. Its not that easy and unless you have kids; the government doesn't care about you. |
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Edited by
msharmony
on
Thu 07/21/11 02:11 PM
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. then such 'independence ' is certainly overrated,,, if its defined by a job,,, edit: if its defined by a 'paying job' to think , the woman who takes care of her kids and home while the husband works is not independent but the woman who gets paid to take care of someone elses kids and home while she pays someone to take care of hers,, is,,, ,,,screwed up values,,, in my opinion |
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Edited by
navygirl
on
Thu 07/21/11 02:27 PM
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO being independent doesnt mean having it easy though being independent, to me, means that someone can adapt to changes as needed a dependent person absolutely HAS to have things done for them, the independent person can CHOOSE their situation and know what to do if that changes... |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO and thats great too its also great to be an 'independent' stay at home mom, who chooses their kids over a job but still has a partner who will work to provide financially while they provide emotionally |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO Nope, I am Xena. 
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in answering this i think we need to ask vi question why a woman feels she needs to be independent? it may be her nature, or that she has been forced by certain circumstance(s) to be that way which may affect the way she handles her relationship with potential spouses unless she happens to meet a very patient and perceptive person who would be understanding and tolerant to the kind of person she is till things sufficiently weld together enough for stability and continuity. I guess I would ask why someone feels the need to not be independent, rather than the other way around. |
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women in these roles, who have CHOSEN these roles and have a partner that compliments such a role,, are glad to be 'only' mom and wife those are pretty significant jobs in life,,,that help future generations 'stand on their own' Thank you MsHarmony! And they DO HAVE AN IDENTITY Not a stand alone identity though, which is dangerous for them when their identity givers leave them. who has one 'stand alone' identity? we are someone's sister, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, and all these identities are substantial on their own. I think it is illogical to equate independence(personal identity) with income. The two have little to do with each other. An independent person knows what they need and how to get it. Sometimes that may require knowing who to turn to as well. Some turn to an employer, some have a partner to turn to, how are either situations anymore 'independent' than the other. A spouse can discard us, but so can an employer. But noone can take away our survival instinct or knowledge which calls for us to be able to adjust to either situation. I have a stand alone identity. It allows me to stand alone and be perfectly okay. It is not the same if your employer lets you go and your man. If you are employed finding another job is easy. If your man dumps you not only will you not have the means to find another man but you are not employable because you were not working... LOL this is funny to me. finding another job is no easier than finding another man,, actually all depends upon how 'picky' you are,,, if the employer dumps you, you are often unemployable because you were 'dumped' ,,,same dilemmas either way no more or less of an indication of whether someone is 'independent' though,, LOL oh yes it does indicate more independence to have or lose a job or having and losing a man That is too funny too. Yep, its easier to walk away from a bad or abusive relationship when you are making your own money than when you have been a stay at home mom and have no source of income or have been out of the workforce so long that your skills are out of date. JMO being independent doesnt mean having it easy though being independent, to me, means that someone can adapt to changes as needed a dependent person absolutely HAS to have things done for them, the independent person can CHOOSE their situation and know what to do if that changes... I will agree with you on that as it has been hard both physically and mentally on me doing everything on my own. 
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Feminists are part of the feminist movement. What feminist movement? If you've never heard of it, google is your friend. Oh I have heard of it but I never actually joined the club. Why would I want equality? I believe women are superior. 
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Apparently, I have said something controversial. Or rather posted a picture that was controversial. I apologize for that, I assumed those posting were followers of feminism. Feminism is, of course, the "theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes". This makes me wonder: Why "independent women" would consider themselves to be inferior to men? Why are you assuming we're all feminists? And why are you assuming those who aren't thin they're inferior to men? Where did "thin" come from?????????????????????????? It's a typo and was supposed to be think. Relax.
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Edited by
singmesweet
on
Thu 07/21/11 02:50 PM
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Two questions for the women here: How many women here consider themselves to be feminists? How many women agree with Spider? I'm sorry but I think this whole thread should be pulled and you not allowed to post for a length of time....just from what you are trying to pull ^^^^^^^^^^^^^. Trying to get people to take sides against someone is very bad taste in my opinion. Because you don't agree with my opinion, I should not be allowed to post? Why? Based on the conversation, I was asking who agreed that those who aren't feminists feel they're inferior to men, as I was interested to hear if there are women who do feel that way. No need to take sides, as it was just a question. Is there a reason you're telling me I should not be allowed to post? Are you a new mod? |
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Two questions for the women here: How many women here consider themselves to be feminists? How many women agree with Spider? I'm sorry but I think this whole thread should be pulled and you not allowed to post for a length of time....just from what you are trying to pull ^^^^^^^^^^^^^. Trying to get people to take sides against someone is very bad taste in my opinion. Because you don't agree with my opinion, I should not be allowed to post? Why? Based on the conversation, I was asking who agreed that those who aren't feminists feel they're inferior to men. No need to take sides, as it was just a question. Is there a reason you're telling me I should not be allowed to post? Are you a new mod? Yep I too saw it as just a general question and not trying to get anyone to take sides. |
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I've never labeled myself as a feminist, as I've never felt the need. But, I don't feel that makes me inferior to men.
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in answering this i think we need to ask vi question why a woman feels she needs to be independent? it may be her nature, or that she has been forced by certain circumstance(s) to be that way which may affect the way she handles her relationship with potential spouses unless she happens to meet a very patient and perceptive person who would be understanding and tolerant to the kind of person she is till things sufficiently weld together enough for stability and continuity. I guess I would ask why someone feels the need to not be independent, rather than the other way around. Agreed. It seems ludicrous to me to limit your choices by being dependent on someone else for your very survival. It gives them undue advantage over you. |
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I've never labeled myself as a feminist, as I've never felt the need. But, I don't feel that makes me inferior to men. I don't think any woman should feel inferior to men. Fact is there is a great misunderstanding of Independent women and Feminism. Both are good things when a person actually takes the time to know what each means. |
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I've never labeled myself as a feminist, as I've never felt the need. But, I don't feel that makes me inferior to men. By old chauvinistic standards we are all feminists and probably communist to boot,,,,lol I think feminism is mostly related by women to active fighters for women's rights. I don't consider myself a feminist either but by definition I guess I would be. I do vote and advocate for women's rights and equality. |
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in answering this i think we need to ask vi question why a woman feels she needs to be independent? it may be her nature, or that she has been forced by certain circumstance(s) to be that way which may affect the way she handles her relationship with potential spouses unless she happens to meet a very patient and perceptive person who would be understanding and tolerant to the kind of person she is till things sufficiently weld together enough for stability and continuity. I guess I would ask why someone feels the need to not be independent, rather than the other way around. I dont feel a need to be 'independent'. I do feel the need to learn to adapt to changing environments and situations though. Sometimes those situations will allow me to 'depend' on others for some things,, and sometimes they wont. |
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I've never labeled myself as a feminist, as I've never felt the need. But, I don't feel that makes me inferior to men. By old chauvinistic standards we are all feminists and probably communist to boot,,,,lol I think feminism is mostly related by women to active fighters for women's rights. I don't consider myself a feminist either but by definition I guess I would be. I do vote and advocate for women's rights and equality. While I get that Spider is saying that anyone who believes in equal rights for women are feminists, what you've said above is what I think when I hear the word feminist. |
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