"i like holdin hands in the theaterI horeback ride."

TMI.

Now THAT is amazing.

The ability to convey FAR too much information in two not-very-well constructed sentences takes real talent....lmao

Now THAT is dedication to your art!

"Profession: invermental controls"

So you're an exterminator?

"I am very easy going, laid back, and like to have a good time. I am educated with a good job. My family and friends are very important to me; they have made me who I am today which is a kind and caring person. I would like to meet someone who shares these same qualities that I have. I would love to meet someone who has a great sense of humor, loves to have fun like I do, and is a good snuggler!! I have a great sense of humor, and I love to just joke around."


I could not have said it better if I had cut and pasted it myself.

" I love biking, as long as it's not uphill. "

I think they call that "coasting".

"Hi, I am looking for someone that I am attracted to."

What's his name? Maybe I know him.

"plus size queen seeking a king to sit beside her on the throne and i don't mean the toilet either "


Just as a rule of thumb, and with rare exception, I find it best to avoid using the word 'toilet' in my profile

"Underachieved risk taker in search of a catalyst in her life."


Or, in simpler terms, "I have a gambling problem and need someone to cover my debts"

What the samhill does that mean anyway???

"i love too pet animals.one of my goals is too become some type of animal myself.what makes me unique is, i plan too be a male dog."

Finally, someone understands what "unique" means!

"Hi Tom"

Tom's off today, call back tomorrow after 1:30.

Well..at least that narrows the playing field...lol

"tall medium guy
i have sense of humour,never pretends, hate liars,independent,easy to be with,friendly, doesnt tolent nonse."

Sort of fell apart at the end there.

I'm pretty sure that is Swedish for " Doesn't have a clue "

"i am a bloned."

Why am I not surprised?

"i play guiter key broad and iam a sound tech in a band so we play alot on weekends."

Yeah, I remember the key broad from my own musical days --

"i have blonde hair and blue eyes i am 5'3 and i weigh 118 pounds for a girl my size."

How much do you weigh for a girl of a different size?

"There are alot of cliches out there and in my world there can be no more hurt!"

Ooooh, there's a dating site for people who like non sequiturs....