"Be sure that honest communication allowing both people to realize the need for an out. of the way,yet public place, to ensue the pleasure of getting to know one another better...thus no fancy dining necessary just a mutual meeting place or walk or an ice cream cone.Understand that a lady needs a public spot for safety issues; given that our culture is prone to danger....yet the excitement to meet a man who has become a new found respectable friend is enchanting and worth all efforts to see if they want to continue to develope a deeper friendship"

No, no... I meant to click on "Pisces"

"There's More Than Trees in the Woods"

Sure. There's ticks, bear sh#t, and poison ivy too. I'm struggling to see your point.

"Well first off I hate to smile,laugh or have fun...LOL Naw the truth is I love to smile laugh and have fun."


Thanks for coming clean.

"I am looking for a long tearm relationship someone who likes a girl who is has a few extra ponds and tattoos of which I have 2"

Seriously, you can never have too many ponds. Or tattoos.

"Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work we go !!"

After a long night of drinking and internetting, I was shocked and disturbed when I awoke to find my browser on 'PlentyOfDwarfs.com'.

Why thank you...and the human thingee is just part of the mystery (although I DO live in NM...aliens and all that, so ya never really know!)

Uhh... I don't get it.

???

I get that quite a bit!

It read like a horoscope to me.

"i love to going out for walking being alone with my partner at a dark room!i want to have sex in the interneti am hot!traditional!"


"Traditional" being a somewhat fluid term....

"Live is Good. I like the smile. I like my style. I want to believe you."

....and this is where the trouble starts....

"iam cool girl and i like to have nice friends from all around the wourldi like the honist peaple and i hate the lieness"


Pauling or the kid from the "Peanuts" comic strip?

"my hobies are sleeping,going to the movies going out for a drink with my friends.i aspire to be a succesfull judge."


Well, the sleeping and drinking are certainly going to serve you well with that one.

"…about my life the only thing I can say is that it’s a first grade open book"


That explains a lot about why these profiles are the way they are.

Run, Spot, run....

"funny,respectful,dynamic,honest,sincere,nice,and the most important is that he sincere."


What's your position on sincerity?

"You like to hang out and dance listen to romantic music."


I most certainly do not. Anybody have the number of a good lawyer?

Picture this: "Guy" sitting there in pink bra (filling out a good C cup), pink panties, black thigh high nylons and high heels" -- no picture of "his" face.

Profile states something like:
"I am not bi, I am str8t, male, but I love lesbians. Males don't contact me I will delete your replies????"

"iwant to alot of fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!and i want to be treat it like a real woman!!!!!!!!!!! :!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


While you're at it, try wanting a translator....

"hi Im hispanic people and going three times to church."

Yeah, that was enough for me, too.

"A bit hard to describe myself maybe we leave some of it aside and you tell me about myself when you get to know me so I can complete this part.."

Nice to see that "Do your own work" is still up and running....

"Tall Beautiful Inteligente Frienly. I would like to meet a nice person. I play violin. And love being a lawyer."

A tall, violin-playing lawyer who can't spell. Fox, are you listening? Here's your next reality show....