i am feeling better after having yesterday and today off. When I go in I am going to request for a vacation tomorrow. I have 120 vacation days built up and 104 hours of sick time built up. I am going to request 2 weeks off and then decide of where to go from there.

I mean 120 hours. I got kind of carried away.

i was wondering how the hell you saved up three months' vacation.

Just wishful thinking.

What really has me excited is my daughter Sara called that same day all that other stuff was happening. She said she would come up from Russelville June 14 and she is bringing my son Darrell with her. It would be so nice to see my grand daughter Autumn. I have my fingers crossed that they will have a safe journey. Autumn had a ring around her eye like that dog on the Little Rascals tv show but I was told it was a birth mark and would go away. My daughter I have been very worried about because she has been a lesbian for so long and she told she met this boy. I know it is a big change for her and just to find out how she is coping with this new change in her life. I just want her to be happy. Her lifestyle is her own business but it sure has me curious.

looks like both of us will get to see our families....

Wow, Roy. Haven't seen you throw a vent for a while. Good for you! I'm glad to hear you are taking a well deserved vactation, and visiting family to boot. Good combo. I hope you have a good time. Now, breathe.

Thanks, Karen. Sometimes I get so excited I forget to breathe. It feels good.

I haven't vented in a long time because my venting buddy gave me the write up. When the lady right under the administrator asked me to come to second shift that nurse asked me rheticorally if they were trying to get rid of her. I know this might sound real weird but the real ***** is I can't call her her a ***** because she has been like my best friend. She has tried to look out for me but as they say **** rolls down hill. She has been trying to get out of there because the pressure is almost unbearable. Another nurse told me that one day she just sat in the floor and through a real temper tantrum. She told me it helped for a little while. It is like there is really isn't any one to really point your finger at. From an outsider's view it would like nothing but drama but to the people affected it is real life.

I think what real cracked me up the other day was when she said, "Admit it you think I am just being a *****." I said, "No. I am trying to understand." I know I sure wouldn't want to have her job. The pressure is hard enough at my level. I can't even imagine what she is going through. But I bet she will crack before I do. It is hard when they crack and not a pretty site at all.

Actually Roy it sounds like she might crack soon.......

I can usually tell when she takes out the Lysol and goes on a cleaning frenzy. She starts with the nursing station desk then attacks the windows. I would hate to be a germ around her. I would be terrified. Then she gives me the Lysol and makes me do the chairs in the waiting area. Then she goes after the breakroom and has me do the wheelchairs. It is horrible to watch to watch her go through it. She scares me.

What really scares me is she has the same name as my ex and reminds me of her in so many ways. I still have vivid memories of when my ex exhited similiar behavior and rage because she thought the kids and me should clean the house, too. It still gives me nightmares.

wow roy damn

I hope things calm down for you Roy, you do have one of the hardest jobs there is and I still admire you for doing it.

Dad was telling me last night he may be getting kicked out of the nursing home, damn I hope not. He is not getting along with an elderly woman there who is always nasty. I just told him he needs to ignore her and remember, he has his wheelchair and he can leave and go to the store or whatever for a break, she can't. Maybe she has had strokes, whatever, and can't help it, but he is so stubborn, who knows. Said he has been talked to by the social worker twice now. That is the only nursing home in this town. He has been talking about going to the next town over, but is 30 miles away and he is on welfare and lots of homes won't accept welfare anymore. I am not going to run in there everytime he wants something if he should move. I think he is acting up to push the fact that he thinks he wants to move, but he has close friendships with the staff here too.

Some days, I think I need to find myself a cave, would be a lot more peaceful.

Thank you for the job you do and what you put up with on a daily basis Roy, and Jax too, I couldn't do it. Take care.

Marie, maybe they can separate the two. We are told to see things from the resident's point of view. It sounds good but doesn't always make sense. I mean if they are still sane it might make sense. But if they are smart enough to take the batteries out of an alarm that is meant to help them or turn it off or disable it in some fashion. Or the opposite point of view. This one elderly lonely lady resident was just trying to talk to this one elderly resident and he took offense just cause she rolled over his feet with a wheelchair. Some of them our best minds have come up with just separate them. It is kind of like that old tv show, 'The Shadow'. "Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of me." The Shadow does, I know but I have tried to talking to some shadows in my poetry. I hope he doesn't get kicked out, too. If that nursing home is anything ours there are probably some aides who get attached to some of the onery ones. The sweet ones get all kinds of attention. Caves are kind of nice if you can get along with the bats but just don't light up because bat fertilizer is explosive.

Thanks Roy. He is really attached to one aide in particular, they tease each other all the time and she can make him do what she wants, there are other aides he is close to too. I know if he did move he would miss them in the long run. He is just being crotchety, his sister died in February and still mourning her some, and one of the residents is a "yeller" and gets on his nerves and the guy in the bed next to him is a "blow hard" and knows it all and irritates him. He gets spoiled really well there, even the kitchen staff ask him what he wants for breakfast so he doesn't have to stick to the menu, talk about service. Think some dementia is setting in. His short term memory is bad. Took him out to breakfast for his 81st birthday last Sunday and invited some cousins. He told my daughter that "mom's" (meaning his wife) who died in 2006, relatives were there. He knows them very well and has been close to them since they were kids. They are my age, and he couldn't remember their names, so think that is part of it too. Hopefully, he will chill out and relax some. I take him his dinner on Friday nights and out to breakfast on Saturday and Sundays so he gets out for that, and he can come and go as he pleases with his electric wheelchair, so he has it better than most.

So, guess I have to call a bat exterminator to clean the cave before I move in, huh? And, not that I want much, but I want hot and cold running water too, and indoor plumbing. I know, demanding in my old age. Take care.

The one aide I am attached to is like that, Marie. They have a separate book on this resident because he is crotchety. She calls him boss and he seems to like that. She works second shift though and hasn't been around him at third shift. His trouble is that he is sane and thinks he has the right to refuse being woke up just to have his brief changed when it is wet. He has his own room. In any other type of business the customer is known to be always right and the business has the right to refuse service to a customer. Theorhetically in any other type of business the customer has the right to refuse patronage to any type of business. But in the nursing home the POA has the final say and not the resident. We are supposed to do what the POA says regardless what the resident thinks is right. We have one resident who does not have relatives and the nursing home is the POA. I went in last night for four hours so an 20 year aide friend could go home. I found out that she just gave her two weeks notice. While I was there another friend of mine who is 19 gave her 2 weeks notice. She confided in me that she just can't the bull any more, either. We are losing them left and right.

It is good that you visit him. I met that aide later at the gas station and she introduced me to her boyfriend. She told him that I was her buddy. She said he bought her a cappachino. I guess she is not collecting shoes any more. The last one bought her a 100 dollar pair of Nikes. But this one isn't married so I personally think the cappachino was a better deal. I told her to remember how pissed she was and wants to go to school now. And if she doesn't study hard that the nursing home is what she has to look forward to. I think I made my point. But people tried to help me when I was her age so it is ultimately up to her what she does. It just irks me something fierce that I am losing so many friends just because they have the sense God gave a goose to leave the place. It is really hard sometimes to keep sane friends but I am glad I have my insane friends like me that can stick it out because they have no choice but to stay because they have bills to pay.