Men are taught to guard their feelings until they feel safe to trust someone. Only then can they reveal their hearts.

In other words, it is probably not reasonable to invite a man (guarded feelings) into a personal emotional world, and expect him to feel comforable sharing his feelings before developing a deep relationship with you.

Its not 'incorrect', that they hold back on sharing feelings.

Youre putting them in an uncomfortable situation.

I suspect what they are trying to tell you is to stop trina make them into a sissy--someone who shares their feelings quickly and readily.

No, this is not a bash men thread. I am sure there are women who do this too.

I have noticed and it may be just my experience but here goes....

In the dating environment, especially, I have to describe my condition. When I describe my MS stuff to some men and they feel "bad" for me or I am assuming this is the trigger, they get into that frame of mind and you can hear it in their tone and even see it in their writing, they want to tell you to "not/stop be/being a sissy" but they do not do it because you are a woman, I am guessing.
It is frustrating for me to try to get them to understand, one, that I am just explaining what the MS does to me and what my body goes through, two, that it is part of my life I cannot escape. Being a sissy is the furthest from the problem...lol and it is something very important if a cohabitation situation were to evolve or even when it comes to picking out where to go on a date. I am usually lightening the information from the real pain and suffering because I don't like pity. But it would be nice to have a little empathy. To understand that they understand would be really nice not dismissing it.

So my question here is: Do you think that by the way we "toughen" up the boys in their younger years, that we remove their ability to show and/or feel empathy correctly?

Or is that when one doesn't have knowledge or experience something it is hard to empathize?

Or both?

Definition: Empathy is the capacity to recognize and, to some extent, share feelings (such as sadness or happiness) that are being experienced by another sentient or semi-sentient being.


What do you think?

I hold back a LOT.
But, my rule of thumb is, I give what I get.
If I am with someone who is not emotionally
available, I would probably hold out forever.
When my partner opens to me, however, I give
back equally.

Equality is everything.

I like to keep myself to myself :D

Hummm I believe if your not willing to give all then you will only receive what your willing to give...

i will hold back while i get to know your heart...

OK that means breakfast is MINE

hes from minessota, was stationed in texas, his sister lives in virgina but deployed in libia, and his mom just moved to az. so theres no one

and he left a desktop computer and moniter (600$), a flat screen tv and dvd player(225$), and all his clothes (200$), and a custom race jacket (250$).

Oh he was honest after awhile that he's not the marrying kind, and he said he loves me. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free. I just had to Mooooove on. I deserve better.

Where diffrent to each other so what we want ,but for your love want for him/her and can you make it come to reality?

Men say they want a good woman, but when they read a profile or look at a photo that simply says; I don't take crap! They tend to say you are mean, too serious and pass you by.

Come on! Basically, we are all looking for the same thing; someone to love us for who and what we are. It is just a matter of the right chemistry and the first meeting.

You will know in the first meeting if there is any connection or not. I have learned to not look at all men as potential mates. Most, are just not! Some people come into your life for a few minutes; others, a few hours, still others, perhaps a few days, week and so on. But seldom, will you meet many, who will be in your life for years. And they don't have to be intimate with you; you just may be luck enough to find a friend.

I'm in my late 50's, I'm tired of the dating game. I'm easy going, but I'm serious about what I'm looking for. I don't care about race, we are all God's children. Your integrety, sincerity, ability to love, willingness to work with me for a better us: These things are important to me.

So...that being said; just where in the heck are the real men?

Just asking.