Community > Posts By > thecoolyman

 
thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:58 AM

Australian Police have been unable to recommend a prosecution for the following scam:

A company takes out a newspaper advertisement claiming to be able to supply imported hard core pornographic videos. As their prices seem reasonable, people place orders and make payments via check.

After several weeks, the company writes back explaining that under the present law they are unable to supply the materials and do not wish to be prosecuted. So they return their customers' money in the form of a company check.

However, due to the name of the company, few people will present these checks to their banks.

The name of the company: "The Anal Sex and Fetish Perversion Company



LMAO, Would you cash that check??noway laugh laugh
bigsmile Cooly

thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:56 AM
Billing
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.

Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.

After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"

"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill."

The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.

The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.

When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer

thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:52 AM
thanks ya'lllaugh dirty lil mindsdevil
hugs to ya Honblushing
bigsmile Cooly

thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:49 AM
kinda reminds me of somethin...Hmmmmlaugh laugh

thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:47 AM

A 70 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a sample tomorrow."

The next day the 70 year old man reappears at the doctor's office and gives him the jar, which is as clean and empty as on - the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explains: "Well, doc, it's like this:

First I tried with my right hand, but, nothing. Then I tried with-my left hand, but still nothing.

Then I asked my wife for help. She - tried with her right hand, but nothing. Then her left, but nothing. She - even tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with the teeth-out, and still nothing.

We even called up the lady next door and-she tried with both hands and her mouth too, but nothing."

The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" the old man replied,

"yep, but no matter what we tried we couldn't get the DARN jar open!"


Got your minds thinking didn't I bigsmile laugh
bigsmile Cooly

thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:44 AM
Phone Problems
An elderly woman contacted her telephone company to report that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called, and that on the few occasions when it did ring, her dog always moaned right beforehand.

A telephone company repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this psychic dog or the senile elderly woman.

He climbed a nearby telephone pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed the subscriber's house.

The phone didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned loudly and the telephone began to ring.

Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found:

1. The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel chain and collar.

2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.

3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the phone number was called.

4. After a couple of such jolts, the dog would start moaning and then urinate on himself and the ground.

5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring. Which demonstrates that some problems "CAN" be fixed by "pissing and moaning".


Don't try this at homelaugh
bigsmile Cooly

thecoolyman's photo
Thu 01/17/08 06:39 AM
nice one Brolaugh
Don't think I'd want to try more than 1noway laugh

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 09:36 PM




Dang Bro, wish someone wrote something like that for medrinker to ya Bro


Well cooly they call you the man
I'll write one for you cause I can
Now you tuly can say
She wrote me one today
Now I've got to go... so I ran



WOW, was that the word, Incredible is more like it,u r 2 sweet
I feel Special:tongue: smooched blushing flowerforyou flowerforyou flowerforyou flowerforyou
Yipeeebigsmile drinker drinker drinker drinker


One more for you cooly

I know this this guy in Whitewright
He's a lover and don't like to fight
In his profile he seems like a jewel
I think that he really is cool
So I thought I would wish him goodnight


Sweet Dreams to you
flowerforyou flowerforyou flowerforyou flowerforyou
Girl you have a wonderful Gift, and you are to this site as well
Thank you so much, thats way2coolsmooched blushing bigsmile
drinker drinker drinker drinker drinker drinker
bigsmile Cooly

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:43 PM
You two are truely awesome, putting you two together is music
awesome once again Rob & Songdrinker your coffee
bigsmile Cooly

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:33 PM
honest i don't know if it was, finally finished that disk off now, but hey thanks ya'llbigsmile

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:31 PM
yep Pete ya sure are Brobigsmile but not the answer

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:22 PM
Sorry bout the party pooperssad laugh

but thanks song & robinbigsmile

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:20 PM
it's a tricky lil riddle, but the hat got blew off into the river below, now how do I get it back????bigsmile

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:15 PM
ya got to read it, how do i get it back:wink:
sorry honbigsmile

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 08:13 PM
Glad ya liked thanks ya'lllaugh

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 07:35 PM



Two old pensioners are taking a trip down memory lane by going back to the place where they first met.

Sitting at a café, the little old man says, "Remember the first time I met you over 50 years ago? We left this cafe, went round the corner behind the gas works, and I gave you one from behind."

"Why, yes, I remember it well, dear," replies the little old lady with a grin.

"Well, for old time's sake, let's go there again. and I'll give you one from behind."

The two pensioners pay their bill and leave the cafe. A young man sitting next to them has overheard the conversation and smiles to himself, thinking it would be quite amusing to see two old pensioners at it. He gets up and follows them. Sure enough, he sees the two pensioners near the gas works. The little old lady pulls off her knickers and lifts up her dress.

The old man pulls down his pants and grabs the lady's hips, and the little old lady reaches for the fence. Well, what follows is 40 minutes of the most athletic sex the man has ever seen. The little old man is banging away at the little old woman at a pace that can only be described as phenomenal. Limbs are flying everywhere, the movement is a blur, and they do not stop for a single second. Finally, they collapse and don't move for an hour.

Well, the man is stunned. Never in his life has he ever seen anything that equates to this -- not in the movies, not from his friends, not from his own experiences.

Reflecting on what he has just seen, he says to himself, "I have to know his secret. If only I could shag like that now, let alone in 50 years' time!"

The two old pensioners have by this time recovered and dressed themselves. Plucking up courage, the man approaches the pensioner.

He says, "Sir, in all my life I have never seen anybody shag like that, particularly at your age. What's your secret? Could you shag like that 50 years ago?"

The pensioner replies, "Son, 50 years ago, that f*cking fence wasn't electrified."



That sure put some spark into itdevil laugh
bigsmile Cooly



If ya check back two days, thia joke was also posted then. drinker



Thanks for the update there UK, not that you haven't HUH:wink:
Not everyone has see it:tongue: Keep it to yourselfbigsmile

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 07:18 PM
A blonde goes into the beauty and hair parlor with her walkman on her head.

"I need to take that walkman off your head," says the beauty specialist as she notices the blonde.

"You can't! I'll die!" retorts the blonde.

"I can't cut your hair with the walkman on your ears!" says the beauty specialist getting annoyed.

"I said you can't take it off, or I'll die!"

The beauty specialist, outraged and flustered, grabs the walkman and throws it off the head of the blonde. Within seconds, the blonde dies.

When the specialist picks up the walkman to listen, she hears it repeating "breath in, breath out, breath in".

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 07:11 PM
thanks much guyslaugh
some smart lil dudeslaugh

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 07:09 PM
thanks ya'lllaugh

thecoolyman's photo
Wed 01/16/08 07:07 PM
ya'll come again now ya herelaugh laugh
bigsmile Cooly