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Community > Posts By > Pickofthelitter
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is anyone honest on here?
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Yes "everybody lies" but this isn't limited to the Internet.
Everybody puts up a front, that may not come down until many months from now. This is the main reason, most relationships, and quick marriages don't last. I'll bet half the folks on this site have a hot temper, but I have yet to read a profile that reveals that important little detail, and lying by omission is lying, just the same. I strait up lied about my age in my profile, but I later reveal that if someone takes the time to read what I wrote there. I think there's a big difference between telling white lies and pretending to be something you're not, than bold faced lying, and omitting important details like being married. And when half the population excuses President Clinton perjuring himself, because they believe his lies were only about his personal sexual escapades, that says a lot about our society today. Small lies may be excusable, but big lies should send up big red flags |
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Topic:
web girls rated me
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wow, another site where you can rate, I finally received my score. I got a 4.7 out of 10 That puts me in the below average...  If you used the picture you have in your profile I'm not too surprised. Hire a photographer if you dare to plan to enter an internet beauty pageant for men lol In fact every guy be smiling in his main pic, and women too, unless they have a pouty/sexy pic that works for them. Nothing is a bigger turn off than someone who looks lonely and depressed in their pic. |
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Usually after like 10-20 posts, I finally decide to say that don't take me seriously, I'm just stirring the pot to see how people gonna answer.  damn, your kidding??? So we can't share the shipping and bring the brother... Hmmmmm..I'm not sure if I'm really kidding anymore. Maybe I should move to a poor country. I'm ok living in a mudhouse and live off the land. Hey no IRS and credit scores, no walmart, no gasoline to buy. I don't even need the internet or electricity. I'm tired of the civilization, it sux..  You'd miss clean toilet paper and other modern conveniences like hot water... For comparison: Many soldiers brought child brides back from Vietnam after the war, (so it can work), but communication is so important I think you'd only be trading one set of problems for another, and then once she became Americanized she may end up as a jaded as any man hating American woman. Not generalizing here (just to be clear) But then again, you could just divorce her, like any other american woman who decides she no longer needs a man, and start fresh with a freash mail order hottie. I guess it depends on what your personal preferences, and goals are. |
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Topic:
SINGLE or TAKEN? - part 15
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"S to the I to the N to the G to the L to the E"
Now That's funny! with a personality like that you won't be single for long. in fact I would whip that line out the next time you intruduce yourself to a female hottie. If that doesn't amuse her nothing will, and be sure to get her phone number before walking away. Good luck |
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web girls rated me
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I had a super attractive admirer tell me I'm "breathtaking" this morning, so I'm feeling pretty good about myself... :D
A good way to find out what random women really think about your looks, is; next time you find yourself in a relationship, find out what your GF's same sex friends comments were when she introduced them to you for the first time. Comments like "Yummy"! are preferred Girl Talk doesn't lie |
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Topic:
thought it would work out
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Hell no, That's not cool!! No man or woman should ask their date for money...  She wouldn't have to ask, because she has a legitimate need, I would offer my help freely. What does a tire cost? It's not going to break me, and saving damsels in distress is my business :) |
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For those that said they don't like the idea of sending the same message to multiple women; do you have any idea how hard it is to come up with something funny, interesting and unique enough to make myself stand out from the crowd? I also used the same words to start conversations in real life and not one woman complained. In fact, I get several phone numbers and have sense been on dates three of those women! What I wrote and sent to these women was not just a clever note. It was also a test to see if she matched with my sense of humor. To find out if she would play along and throw something back at me. Almost all of the women in real life did this. On the web one did. My guess is, although you are good looking, you aren't Brad Pitt. You can't just walk into a room and have to beat the women away with a stick, just as you cannot post your pic on a website and have your inbox over-flowing with their emails. Wit, humor and charm do not always translate well thru emails, so I guess you have to rely on those attributes in real life, along with your sparkling personality. I mean, what's more impressive to a woman? Playful banter thru emails over the course of a few days, or in real life over the course of a few minutes.? I would guess, the latter, because it is much more personal. Women's brains don't always work the way we think they should. Good looks and charm aren't mutually inclusive, and I've met few women who place as much importance on looks, as men do (men are more visual by nature). But I agree: the later is more personal, and when impressed in person, a woman is more likely to give out her phone number. It's not like you can make a woman laugh here, and 5 minutes later get her phone number, as you can in person. And as more proof that the later is more personal: I've had several long term relationships, which lasted many years, and it's no surprise to me, I met none of those women here on the Internet. Conversely: On the Internet dating sites; I've met plenty of women who will ignore communications, when they would feel to ashamed to treat someone with the same disrespect in person. Be confident and funny and keep a smile on your face when approaching women in public, and you'll have plenty more luck there. |
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Topic:
Back to the drawing board...
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Two dates. The first one was coffee, last night was dinner at a returaunt of her choice. Seemed like we connected on many levels. I texted her and said, "I had a great time! :)..etc." She texted me back, "I did not. Please don't message me again." I replied, "Alright, no problem. Hope you find that special someone." Well, just gotta keep going. It bothered me for 10 seconds, but not any longer. That's life, I just brush it off my shoulder, lol. For all you other people who take rejection so personally, don't! :) Good attitude You really don't know if there's anything there until you meet in person at least once, or twice, but you have little control over attraction and compatibility. I found her comments rude, and her use of a text to end it, cold and uncaring, so you're better off cutting bait now! lol Date on! |
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Topic:
Intimidated by a "smart" S/O
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Being smart is definitely a curse socially. Or should I say being smart as well as being sane. I've been trying to restructure my way of thinking when dealing with the opposite sex. I've had many discussions regarding this topic with a female friend of mine. I've found that the higher your level of thinking, the higher the level of expression needs to be. This is great if you are posting on forums but very bad news while dating. The more you express to the other person, the more you come off as 'lecturing' to them and run the risk of ending up on the aggressive side of a seemingly one sided conversation. I came to the conclussion that when getting to know somebody, 'dumbing down' so to say, is the way to go until you know more about them. My friend says it's lowering my standards but I disagree. If you want to understand a person that speaks another language, is'nt the best way to go about it learning how they speak? There is actually alot of wonderful people out there that we are not getting to know because of communication issues. A lady that I talk to may be timid or outgoing when I meet her. Neither may end up being her true personality. She just happens to act that way when she is getting to know somebody. More listening and understanding is needed and even though we often judge another's intelligence based on conversation, I now think that looking for feeling is more important. Good points, but communication and intelligence aren't mutually inclusive, and intelligence comes in different forms. For instance: A scientist may have a high IQ, and be able to lecture the entire scientific community on the benefits of stem cell research, yet lack street smarts (common sense), and find it nearly impossible to communicate his innermost feelings clearly. Still it's important not to judge someone's intelligence, according to their language (communication style), which I think was your last point, and you also made some spot on comments in regard to communication issues. |
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Topic:
SINGLE or TAKEN? - part 15
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Taken - for the past 5 years - and I'm proud of that because frankly easier NOT to have a lasting relationship -
but when a woman tells me she now wants to be "alone", I know I'll probably find myself back in circulation again before long. But since digging deeper into her underlying feelings, the ones she found so impossible to communicate to me, we've both committed to working on our relationship (until the spring), and then we'll see, but I will continue working on myself regardless... so that either I can be a better partner to her, or someone else if she doesn't care for what she has. |
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Topic:
Keeping a conversation
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I always assume I am bothering people and they probably don't want to talk to me. So, I try not to bombard them with questions and chit chat. I think any one you take the time to bother, and bombard, should be flattered... lol When a guy sends you a long e-mail (5 paragraphs), you still respond with a short answer (2 lines)? Assuming you recieve long e-mails. |
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Sorry things didn't work out, but until you deal with the grief from this breakup, you're not going to be 100% emotionally available to anyone else, and you're likely carry these hurt feelings into your next relationship. I think you have a lot to offer to the right guy, and don't settle... but take care of yourself first. Maybe I miss understood and you're only here to vent, and that's cool. This is as good-a-place as any. but thats the thing....the "grief" you speak of....not there. I went back to him thinking he would try to make that emotional connection that he originally shredded up. I left once....he begged me to come back...so i did...and because he had different views on things that happened this past weekend he wanted to go off on me and get rid of me...so..no giref about that hun. He would have had to create a bond with me first....captured my heart somehow....and he never attempted to do so...so... I'm ok. I'm not even mad. I have been single for so long that I'm used to it. I kinda like it. If mr.right comes along then great!! But there are no tears for him....the way i look at it...he is the one loosing out. He is going to die a lonely miserable man. and I'm cool with that  You care about the relationships you engage in so of course there's grief. If you didn't care you never would've mentioned it. This is just the first phase in the grief process. Denial I don't mean to give you more grief here, just trying to be a supportive friend. |
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Sorry things didn't work out, but until you deal with the grief from this breakup, you're not going to be 100% emotionally available to anyone else, and you're likely carry these hurt feelings into your next relationship.
I think you have a lot to offer to the right guy, and don't settle... but take care of yourself first. Maybe I miss understood and you're only here to vent, and that's cool. This is as good-a-place as any. |
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Topic:
Keeping a conversation
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Sometimes I exchange e-mails with people and notice that the person on the other end doesnt ask any questions making it hard to keep up a conversation. They'll just answer mine with short responses... Is this a sign that they just are not that into me, or maybe they are shy and cant think of things to say? Should I or should I not hold this against someone? It is always hard to tell over e-mails... Hope this makes sense...lol I agree it's hard to tell in e-mail, and for every one of us who find writing easy, there's someone else who doesn't feel comfortable expressing themselves in words. I wouldn't jump to any concussions. If a guy responds at all he's probably somewhat interested... Most men are not very communicative - with me being the exception to the rule - but I also encounter women who don't seem to have much to say... I figure they're busy answering other e-mails, and whatever else they have going on in their lives; It takes a lot of time to write intelligently and thoughtfully, and there just aren't enough hours in the day! Others may be shy, or less communicative by nature, but that really has nothing to do with whether or not you will hit it off. |
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Topic:
Opposites attract?
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Yea. At first it was new and interesting but eventually I got bored.  Interesting topic Opposites do attract in the way ying relates to yang; the pieces seem to fit perfectly - or at first glance anyhow. Relationships are like a dance, and so someone needs to take the lead. It's not that we want to play that role, but are rather forced into it. It can end with boredom, but more likely it ends because what we once found so attractive, begins to irritate and frustrate us. For instance: Many women may find themselves attracted to strong confident men, but later they may find themselves feeling controlled, or stifled, and are only left feeling a lot of resentment for him. Did you really expect a strong confident independent man to allow a woman to control him? One person is going to be more communicative than the other, and one is going to need more space, while the other craves closeness, and if these opposite feelings are not worked through successfully, this push and pull, ebb and flow, can drive you away from each other. |
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Topic:
What do you do~~~
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I would pick up the communication where the other person dropped the ball, and get to the bottom of it quickly.
Making a judgment call, because of a perceived lack of communication, is jumping the gun. |
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Topic:
Intimidated by a "smart" S/O
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I have no expectations of meeting someone who's smarter than me, but I can't see dating a dummy.
At some point I need other parts of my body (brain) stimulated. |
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"Will work for lasting relationship"
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Where to start lol first of all; if you're trying to create attraction, don't be yourself.
The video is a good example of just how impersonal Internet dating is, and how different men and women are |
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I don't go clubbing either. When I think clubbing I think dance music, that sounds something like um-cha -um-cha um-cha boom-cha boom-cha ears bleeding
Female impersonator's huh I've never understood the fascination many women have with female impersonators, and I've never been, but I did dress in drag on halloween once lol and still have the pictures :) How about Karaoke? I'm the Karaoke king! |
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