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Community > Posts By > Snuffulluffuguss
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Topic:
green light
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What are some of the signals you ladies implement in letting your companion know that tonight could be his lucky night, if he's not already on top of the situation?
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I smoke, but I don't put out without a ring on this finger. Paper or plastic?
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Promises midgets money for sex, then doesn't pay.
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Topic:
why men invade marriages
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The most appealing women I've met were already in relationships. I guess the good ones don't stay single long.
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Depends. Do you put out?
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Topic:
wants to take things slow
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Put him on the friend list.
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Get in the car and insist on the most expensive restaurant around, drink until slobbering drunk, flirt excessively with every person of the opposite sex within 100 feet then look offended when they try and insinuate that you might fool around. while asking" What kind of a person do you think I am?" It would never happen, drunk women are easy. 
Well I guess you could just wait until she passes out. But wouldn't slipping her a roofie be cheaper than buying drinks all night? OH HELL just smack her over the head to knock her out, and tell her you wanna play cave man. On second thought "that might actually work with some women." What kind of gentleman do you think I am? If sex didn't happen before she passed out, I'd just order pay-per-view porn in her living room. There's nothing funny about date-rape 
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Get in the car and insist on the most expensive restaurant around, drink until slobbering drunk, flirt excessively with every person of the opposite sex within 100 feet then look offended when they try and insinuate that you might fool around. while asking" What kind of a person do you think I am?" It would never happen, drunk women are easy.
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Ask him to wear a toupe, and this funny nose & glasses bit if he insists on the tie dye thing. I usually pin a condom to my lapel, like a flower. OMG Snuffy !!(you don't mind me calling you that do you?) YOu are SOOO turning me on with that description.  Stop it now.  
Actually On dates I try to wear my best paint splattered old ratty t-shirt, the cheapest perfume that I can find. And a pair of old sweats that are two sizes two small to REALLY accentutate the muffin top.  
I have a bottle of Brut aftershave I got for Christmas when I was 8 I save for dating only, that always impressess women. |
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Offer to pay for the meal if it goes well.
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Ask him to wear a toupe, and this funny nose & glasses bit if he insists on the tie dye thing. I usually pin a condom to my lapel, like a flower. |
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Ask him to wear a toupe, and this funny nose & glasses bit if he insists on the tie dye thing. |
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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When you pick her up, ask her if she'll mind changing outfits, washing off some of that make-up and putting on some different perfume.
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Topic:
ways to impress a date
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Be fashionably late. I've always had luck showing up an hour late-preferably drunk. |
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Topic:
rabid butterflies
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This is not a joke! A huge swarm of disgruntled rabid butterflies are moving north thru Texas as we speak. Apparently the butterflies are well armed, and they appear to be raping hundreds of innocent onlookers. People please, if you are accosted by the raping butterflies, let them finish...
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Topic:
dating protocol
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Not yet. I'm actually quite amiable as a rule, but it's a beautiful dream. Wouldn't it be fun from your viewpoint for you to pick the epitome of all the jerks you met, and give him the worst date of his life? It would be liberating. Free yourself and put it on your to do list! I'm not sexist or anything, I think we all owe it to ourselves.
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Topic:
dating protocol
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I'm gonna go out in a blaze of glory someday when I meet just the right woman, and pull off the worst date ever; full of beautiful moments, like when I suggest a salad, or when I ask the waitress to split the check.
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Topic:
dating protocol
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You could make a bargain... How bout 'if I lose 10 lbs, will you match me?' Or...'What would make me more attractive to you? How about I join hair club, and for me, you could join Jenny, whaddya say? We could please each other if we try' That would be a nice gesture if my receding hairline didn't already make me even more sexy. And my extra weight means there's just more of me to love, I do my part. It's a curse, but I bear it. ...Or....'I will engage is psychiatric counseling in exchange for you engaging in nutritional counseling.' Its a win/win. Give me your hate, I don't mind. It's still funny! |
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Topic:
dating protocol
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You could make a bargain... How bout 'if I lose 10 lbs, will you match me?' Or...'What would make me more attractive to you? How about I join hair club, and for me, you could join Jenny, whaddya say? We could please each other if we try' That would be a nice gesture if my receding hairline didn't already make me even more sexy. And my extra weight means there's just more of me to love, I do my part. It's a curse, but I bear it. I hope you know you've just officially ruined my buzz!!!!
I really am sorry about your buzz, mine's great, I'm laughing my *** off over here. It's funny because it's absurd. |
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Topic:
dating protocol
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I'm looking for socially acceptable ideas on how to suggest to my date to get a salad. Any ideas? Why would you try to even suggest she eat a salad? Do you think she's too fat? If you're that shallow then you need to bail out honey & let her eat whatever the hell she wants to eat!!! There is no socially acceptable way to say 'Honey, you're too fat. How about a salad today"?  ::::::
Can you believe a progressive fella like myself is still single? I'm just not appreciated! 
Geez, I can't imagine why some goddess hasn't snatched you up yet!! Imagine that!!! You seem to be gods gift to women...at least you seem to think so from your profile & post!! I'm actually underweight & I'd beat the **** out of you if you ever as much as suggested a salad!!!! Oh lighten up! I'm just kidding around. You know, having fun? Chillax, eat whatever you like! Loosen up! Life is short.
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