Community > Jokes & Funny Stories

Topic: another Joke
Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 02:14 AM
Omg pawhahaha enjoy Omar

IUBasketball Joined Fri 05/22/09 Posts: 1566	Sat 09/04/21 11:11 AM
Good thread Apple, we have a similar sense of humor

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 01:51 PM
An Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bakery. The Englishman steals 3 buns and puts them into his pockets and leaves. He says to the Irishman, "That took great skill and guile to steal those buns. The owner didn't even see me." The Irishman replied, "That's just simple thievery, I'll show you how to do it the honest way and get the same results." The Irishman then proceeded to call out the owner of the bakery and says, "Sir, I want to show you a magic trick." The owner was intrigued so he came over to see the magic trick. The Irishman asked him for a bun and then he proceeded to eat it. He asked 2 more times and after eating them again the owner says, "Okay my friend, where's the magic trick?". The Irishman then said, "Look in the Englishman's pockets."

Slim gym Joined Tue 05/14/19 Posts: 39815	Sat 09/04/21 01:56 PM
Lost my job at the Bank ! I was taking home a cool 1000 a day !!! Dang !!!

Slim gym Joined Tue 05/14/19 Posts: 39815	Sat 09/04/21 01:58 PM
my wife used to tell me that men could not multitask like women do ... So I told her how beautiful she was .... with a straight face !!!

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 01:58 PM
An 8-year old girl went to the office on "Take your kid to work day". As they were walking around the office the young girl started crying. Her father asked what was wrong. As the staff gathered round, she sobbed loudly "Daddy, where are all the clowns that you said you work with?"

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 02:00 PM
Good thread Apple, we have a similar sense of humor Thanks IUBasketball,relaxing aint it?enjoy

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 02:01 PM
my wife used to tell me that men could not multitask like women do ... So I told her how beautiful she was .... with a straight face !!!

JulieABush Joined Thu 01/26/17 Posts: 3681	Sat 09/04/21 02:15 PM
Funny .

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 02:23 PM
A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery store. She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her away, complaining and criticizing throughout the process. When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked what she had stolen from the store. The lady defiantly replied, "Just a stupid can of peaches." The judge then asked why she had done it. She replied, "I was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the store." The judge asked how many peaches were in the can. She replied, "Nine, but what do you care about that?" The judge patiently said, "Well, ma'am, because I'm going to give you nine days in jail -- one day for each peach." As the judge was about to drop his gavel, the lady's long-suffering husband raised his hand and asked if he might speak. The judge said, "Yes, what do you have to add?" The husband said, "Your Honor, she also stole a can of peas."

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sat 09/04/21 02:45 PM
my wife used to tell me that men could not multitask like women do ... So I told her how beautiful she was .... with a straight face !!! Thank you for laughing your way to this thread,i mean thanks for comin to this thread,enjoy

Cloudy Joined Wed 03/24/21 Posts: 5378	Sat 09/04/21 06:56 PM


JulieABush Joined Thu 01/26/17 Posts: 3681	Sun 09/05/21 03:48 AM
Funny .

IUBasketball Joined Fri 05/22/09 Posts: 1566	Sun 09/05/21 08:07 AM
Good thread Apple, we have a similar sense of humor Thanks IUBasketball,relaxing aint it?enjoy Yes it is and this has become the first thread I check when I sign on looking for the next good joke lol

Slim gym Joined Tue 05/14/19 Posts: 39815	Sun 09/05/21 09:28 AM
my definition of a nurse : a beautiful woman who holds your hand for one whole minute, and expects your pulse to be normal !!

Slim gym Joined Tue 05/14/19 Posts: 39815	Sun 09/05/21 09:31 AM
I asked my girlfriend what kinda books she was interested in ... she replied .... cheque books duly signed !!!

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sun 09/05/21 09:39 AM
my definition of a nurse : a beautiful woman who holds your hand for one whole minute, and expects your pulse to be normal !! hahaha...got it.

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sun 09/05/21 09:40 AM
I asked my girlfriend what kinda books she was interested in ... she replied .... cheque books duly signed !!! hilarious...lemme start collecting those kind of books eh

JulieABush Joined Thu 01/26/17 Posts: 3681	Sun 09/05/21 06:03 PM
Funny Slim .

Apple of Your EYES Joined Mon 03/15/21 Posts: 5477	Sun 09/05/21 08:05 PM
This woman went on holiday leaving her husband behind. Before she left she told him to take special care of her pet Siamese cat. As soon as she arrived she phoned home to ask about the cat. Her husband said, "The cat just died! " She burst into tears and started to read the riot act to him, "How can you be so blunt? Why couldn't you have broken the news gradually? Today you could have said that it was playing on the roof. Tomorrow you could have added that it fell off the roof and broke it's leg. Then on the third day you could have said that the poor thing had passed away peacefully in the night. You could have been more sensitive about the whole thing! By the way, how's my mother? He said, "She's playing on the roof!"