I wonder what men think of women online or on dating sites who seek sex.

At least one man on this site thinks it is a myth that women look only for sex .

I think that is only a partial myth . There is not the same stigma /shaming attached for a woman to claim she is only looking for sex . Are men subject to the same stigma??

Is it acceptable for a woman to seek only sex ???

I always thought there was a shaming stigma attached to women who only want sex. In the US you often hear those women being called sluts or whores. At least that was how it was offline, I'm not so sure about online or dating sites. Or if that stigma is still attached. Based on some of the comments I've heard in the forums, it seems to be.

As far as men were concerned, those that were only looking for sex were considered to be "sowing their oats". It was considered normal for the young guys to sow their oats, but young women were supposed to be ladylike. Though I'm not sure who the young men were supposed to have sex with if it was inappropriate for young women to do so, haha.

I believe if a woman wants to seek only sex, that is her business. There is no right or wrong to it, unless she's using sex to hurt others, imo.

It's draining.

Totally agree with your comments river . I believe that stigma still exists . There has only been a slight shift in attitudes . Regardless of shaming ,(whether by men or society ) ... some women are very open and direct about seeking sex , others choose a more subtle approach .

I am reminded of a saying . “Sex is power”... Stigma/shaming often seek to control and keep power in check .

isn’t that better than frustration :-)

Yes yes, but sometimes it's nice to talk or have a meal.

a woman friend of mine said, "men are microwaves, women are crockpots" in regards to sex drive...

i heard a guy in front of me speaking on the phone to a woman that only wanted sex...i promise i won't fall in love he said, i'm a real dick i only like to use women...i was trying to imagine what sort of woman he was talking to...but in new orleans...well....

i was on a dating site a while back and a woman said men aren't that different from women u can tell by reading the profiles....so i read some men's profiles and amazingly they weren't all that different from the women's

also with the ever increasing "butch woman" becoming more and more popular we are getting even more alike....

i wrote my 2nd fiction book under a pen name...in the book a male boxing coach travels the world with 5 beautiful models and does show boxing and inadvertently ends the lock down world wide...

I've heard guys say, "There's the ones you take to bed", and then "There's the ones you take home to mother".

I'm interested in seeing what the men here on Mingle say.

I wonder who that man is...
quote me well blondey, I said "they do not exist and IF they exist, they find what they're looking for before getting to you"
That means that... yeah ok maybe there are 2 or 3 on this planet but if they really exist it does not take more than 5 minutes to find someone, so a man should be very very lucky to be in exactly that place in those 5 minutes.
It's like the lottery, someone really wins, but not you (nor me!)

Getting to the second point... we are still debating if on a date the man should pay and you really want to talk about sexual freedom for women???
Come on, don't be offended but I find it ridiculous. At least in general.
I don't have a problem with women having sexual freedom, but actually most women do have problems, they are the first to judge women and to feel 'in danger' because "their men" could quite easily fall in the net!

and to be honest, in case you haven't noticed, sexual freedom has gone a lot down in the last 20-30 years. From official statistics for instance, in France now the number of bikini sold has passed the number of topless. I tell you that when I lived in France, to see French women not in topless on the beach was a rarity, now it's over 50%
It's not the 70s I'm afraid...

As long as both parties are willing then why not

Are you aware that "mother" is, after all, a woman?

P.S. Message for Blondey: I'm going to bed, please support Luna Rossa for me (not even sure they are racing tonight, in case do it)

Yup, we have that saying in Dutch too, "There's the ones you BLEEP" and then "There's the ones you marry."

OT as far as I know the stigma concerning women still exists, and funny enough I think it's mostly other women who judge them?

When concerning men... that stigma is less, but it is there I think. At least I don't want a man who's done it with one too many women.
You call that a man-wh***

I typically don't like needy people, but I've been known to make exceptions for a woman of that particular "mindset."

Depends on the woman.
Depends on what she looks like.
Depends on her life situation.
Depends on a lot of things.

IME a lot, to maybe most, women are down for "just sex," or "really" online for just sex...if the guy is hot (or sometimes rich) enough.

Women seeking sex online are on a huge spectrum.

There's the married looking because her husband wants to watch or threesome, the woman that wants revenge for her husband cheating, the woman visiting from out of town and wants to feel "free," there's the bi woman looking for another woman, there's the (older) woman that just wants to scratch an itch or is tired of loneliness, there's the woman that's looking to baby trap a guy and she's got a drawer full of pinholed condoms, there's the lesbian that just wants to get pregnant but doesn't want to deal with a guy, there's the just plain ugly woman that can only get attention by offering sex.

And so many more. Lots of different motivations for women to seek sex online.


lol.
Then he's either not that attractive, doesn't have a very high income, has a very insecure personality, is inexperienced with the internet, or is telling you what he thinks you want to hear in order to get you to talk about sex more.


Sure there is.
Why do you think the marriage rate keeps falling.

Women are mostly protected from it because of the internet.
They can find echo chambers where women gather around and tell each other how "strong and independent and empowered" they are for riding the carousel.

Thanks to the internet they can avoid all the statistics and reality.
Not to mention, men have found it benefits them in the short term for them not to. Are you more likely to "netflix and chill" with a guy that tells you how much he hates "sluts" or someone that spouts the "uhh..yeah..you go gyrl, you live your best life and go after what you want...hey! I just realized I got some d for you to empower yourself with, no labels or expectations, I don't want to limit you, I'm here for you, yeah that's it!"

There is the false virtue signal that the stigma/shaming has "lessened."
In practical actual reality, it's just quietly in the background.


It's a poor comparison.

This is like asking "are men subject to the same stigma when called a bad mother?"


"Acceptable" doesn't really apply so much as risks, costs, and consequences.

If she's hot and I want to bang her?
Sure. I don't care.

If I am looking for someone to marry?
And I find out she was out trolling the internet for just sex, one night stands, has a high body count?
I wouldn't take her seriously.

IMO a lot of the time when people are asking if it's "acceptable," what they're "really" asking is "am I absolutely guaranteed no cost, risk, or consequences to following selfish personal gratification?"

If she's someone I'd be willing to bone...

Sounds like a unicorn to me..

Or any other mythical beast you can name.

Come on now, it is 2021, nobody really cares what anybody is or is looking for unless you’re a criminal. For example,There are so many letters in the LGBQ… Acronym designation I have no idea what they all mean. I would love to meet a woman who only wants sex but I can’t even get a plain old date With no upfront indications of sex LOL

I don't see any thing wrong .