I also have a 19 year old daughter that sees everything I do and I want to be sure that she understands that a good strong relationship takes time and effort. I'm her model for her life and I would like to see her eventually settle down with a good man. So I am trying to set a good example for her.

don't you think you could exchange numbers and at least talk to that person before you meet? I mean find out if that person is real or not some robot

I think before exchange numbers, it's better to have a skype or whatever you prefer for video chats before you are comfortable to exchange numbers and meet face to face. At the end, still offline will be the way to cut it short that whether the guy is worth for your love and time. :-)

I've done that and have had to block several phone numbers. So I don't give it out right away until I feel a little bit more comfortable with the person. I don't use chat apps anymore and I prefer to be careful about it now. It may not be the ideal solution, but it's working for me right now.

The proper "on line dating" progression:
1. 3 to 4 messages back & forth on whatever site, over 2 to 3 days.

2. If both parties are still interested. this should progress to a phone # exchange for a "live" conversation. Skype or Zoom can also be used. There should be 3 to 4 conversations, which should ultimately lead to arrangements for an in-person "first meet". Due to all the pandemic restrictions, venues to meet up at are practically non existent. If you live in an area with good weather all year round, pick a park & take a walk. For cold weather states, at this time of year, pick a store or mall to walk through. Daytime for first meeting & under 30 minutes is best.

3. Repeat until relationship is achieved, or it is determined that there will be no relationship. Start stwp 1 again with new potential online match.

Do not let either step 1 or 2 become dragged out. If there is no progress, there is a reason usually: the person is a scammer, catfisher, etc. Meeting in person should always be the goal if 2 people actually connect on multiple levels of attraction.

That makes sense if both are within driving distance. What is the procedure if they are 100 or more miles apart, perhaps in another state? Thats what I get a lot

But first you have to contact a real person. I have yet to get to step 2, the phone call. OK there was one call, bad connection could not hear well so basically nothing. Step 2b has never been achieved in my 1 year here. If we go to texting then that is as far as it goes. So hard part is step 0 not mentioned, find a real person who shows some interest

Clearly you are not a trusting person. A woman may pick up on that and that could be the reason she doesn't want to speak over the phone.
Also, if a guy pushes all the time about that it becomes whingy. I don't take too well to that.
I don't easily go to a phone call either. I don't fancy giving everyone I happen to talk to online my phone number. I only ever do so when it feels really good.
And the one guy I didn't hesitate long with was the one who sent me his number, gave me his address too, just to make me feel more comfortable that he wasn't a creep.
He left it entirely up to me to phone him or give him my number. I eventually did contact him via WhatsApp -meaning using his number and showing him mine. But he never pushed me nor would he have.
We ended up having a relationship.
But everything with him clicked. As long as I don't feel that with a man I will not give him my phone nr.

I don't think you can say someone is not a trusting person for not wanting to give out his number. There are loads of scammers out there and not everyone with a female photo is a female. You yourself express a lot of hesitancy in giving your number. Maybe guys pick up on the fact you aren't trusting? j/k I actually think its a good policy

Guys tend to be too trusting and get taken very often. Maybe just have their number or email put on a spam list, maybe something worse. It doesn't pay to be too trusting nowdays

Except that the original comment was more about the lack of willingness on the part of women to give out their numbers. I don't personally want a ton of people to have my phone number, especially after only a few days. And the "standard protocol" does not take into account a person's comfort level, it will vary from person to person. There is no set protocol. Things can progress only when both parties are equally comfortable with each other.

May I invite you to read again and not jump to incorrect conclusions?
I was not talking about a man not wanting to give his phone number at all. I was talking to the OP about his attitude towards women who don't want to give their phone nr and talk over the phone.
The topic isn't about a man not wanting to give his phone nr btw. In case you missed that.
It's also not a competition for who gets taken the most. Men often think it's them, while in actual fact it happens to women an awful lot. Too many men out there pretending to be relationship material.

Agreed. The online dating platform has become a breeding ground for scammers and no one is exempt from it. It pays for all to be more careful when looking for a potential life partner. I have met a couple of people from here, and face to face there wasn't the connection that we had over the phone and texting, but it was still a slow process for me to get to that point.

I agree, meeting in the real world is the only way to know if you are both interested in a real relationship. If they live local and are not prepared to meet for a coffee in the daytime at a place of their choosing after exchanging a few emails, then I would walk away because it aint going to happen. If they live hundreds of miles away, then yes you need to know more about each other, chat longer, before deciding to make a long journey to meet for coffee, but you still need to meet up fairly quickly, or you just become penpals in my opinion.

You can't have a really bad experience over a cup of coffee, only if they turn up looking 20 years older and 5 stone heavier, then you need to use the urgent text message escape plan.

Y'all haven't figured it out yet? Women join these sites for ATTENTION, the worst of them being those that don't get much attention in the real world.

Most women aren't really here to meet in person as they get their "fix" and need for attention from all the weak, pathetic, white knight "men" out there giving it to them.

i have myself have meet a couple in my area close by. with all the fake profiles it gets very frustrating when the put on there profile of living in your home state but are somewhere else. what say you on this situation?

Unless I know people who have been on this site for awhile, they are strangers to me.

not always. some are actually looking for mr right. But yes there are way to many people with fake profiles. I have them call me to hear there voice. Some are just plain smooth talkers. just depends on the right questions.

Try me Jeff, I want to talk

As far as finding out if they are a Bot or not, that's easy. This will probably be deleted.
How they respond. Simple responses after you type out a Paragraph. Can't answer Simple 2 grade Word Problems. I took one from the Idiocracy IQ test. It's Funny as F'"k even when or if a "real" person gives the wrong answer. then get Pissed when you tell them they are Wrong 4,5,6 times...
But if Any refuse to Send a Photo that proves they are the person in the photo they are using (come up with your own requirements but take my photo as a example) means they are also not who they say they are because REAL Females here Understand why you are asking. How they type is also a give away. I HIGHLY Doubt bots and scammers bother to read this because they don't even bother to read Profiles, they are under a time limit and have to meet quotas.
They will accuse you of playing games and wasting their time. they will get Pissed and upset. Start loosing their tempers.

But Still, Sometimes, Sometimes you just have to take a chance and answer them or contact them back. Just still, they have to provide proof. I have had them Fake it but I was not born yesterday.