I am also a single parent of a beautiful baby girl. As much as i wish that I were in a different situation, I am thankful that my daughter and I are healthy and happy. I wouldnt change being a mom for anything, and the more i think about the fact that her "donor" isnt around, the better I think it really is. Not just right now, but in the long run. I mean, I dont know how I'm going to answer the questions about her daddy, who is he and all that but i will figure out how to deal with that when the time comes you kno... My advice to you would be to do your best, make sure you do things to keep yourself happy too because if your not happy, your baby isnt happy. You just have to take things as they come. I know its hard, but try not to focus on the fact that your child may not have the father you always dreamed of, and always remember the gift we've been given and do the best you can do, its all you can do, isnt it? You are all that that baby has when it comes down to it, its you that has to get up in the middle of the night, change all the diapers and all that stuff but its all that stuff, i think, that makes us love our children more. I mean, who really likes changing diapers... I dont. But we do it everyday because its just what we have to do.
I hope that helps a lil bit?

hi there will always be bad times where you struggle but the good times will out weigh them have faith be positive just think some ppl cant have kids so be thankful that you have,i am a singlemom of 3 kids one of my kids has disabilities if i can cope anyone can just the thing like when they want a hug and when they tell you they love you things like that areworth all the stress you go through hope it helps what i said remember there is always someone worse off take care

It was never meant to be a walk in the park,,,from BLS.gov

Adults living in households with children under 6 spent an average of
2.0 hours per day providing primary childcare to household children.
Adults living in households where the youngest child was between the
ages of 6 and 17 spent less than half as much time providing primary
childcare to household children--0.8 hour (47 minutes) per day. Pri-
mary childcare is childcare that is done as a main activity, such as
physical care of children and reading to or talking with children.
(See table 9.)

If these are stats for parents IN The home,, imagine how much less time there is for the non custodial parent living away from home?
I think two income families, cell phones, internet, video games, television,, have all compounded to help create extremely detached families that are no longer units so much as several individuals who happen to exist in the same building.

Anyway, my daughter is near or with me every moment that she is awake unless I am working. As she grows and enjoys her own space more, I wont deter it but she will know she is loved and that is the best thing that can be done for a child(besides good living examples).

i just became a single parent my daughters father who has 3 others besides her (2 with x wife 1 with x gf)and my munchkin dosint even know she is alive have no way of contacting him relized he didnt wanna be apart of her life now have to figure how to take him to court or if i even should

It is sad that so many do the deed and dont want to pay for the lease....

I am relieved so many others have the wherewithall to step up to the plate and try to make up the difference.

I'm helping my mom take care of my nephew. His mom sees him maybe every few monthes when she feels like it just so my mom will stop begging her to see him. The father hasn't seen him in I would say over a year now.

My mom has been out of work for about a year now, so at this time I'm "stuck" living with her to help her out. I moved back in with her about two years ago to help her with my nephew.

I'm still waiting to get back to MY life.

Yea it's amazing how your nephew's mom has managed to get on with her life without her son obviously not caring that she has taken away from your life. And your mom's. Some people are so selfish.

IT IS HARD BEING A SINGLE MOM I HAVE A SON AND A DAUGHTER IT IS VERY HARD DOIN IT ALONE MY SON HAS KIDNEY DIESESE AND MY DAUGHTER PASSED AWAY IN SEPT09 IT HAS BEEN A ROUGH JOURNEY FOR ME BUT I JUST TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME I THANK THE LORD ABOVE FOR WHAT I HAVE MY SONS DADDY HAS NEVER SEEN HIS SON HE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM MY DAUGHTERS DAD WOULD ONLY COME SEE HER TWICE A WEEK IF WE WHERE LUCKY HE DIDNT EVEN SHOW UP TO HER MERMORIAL SERVICE HE WANTED TO GET HIGH INSTEAD I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE SOMEONE TO HELP ME BUT GOD NEVER GIVES YOU SOMETHING YOU CANT HANDLE I LOVE MY KIDS SO MUCH AND IF YOU HAVE FAMILY AROUND DONT HESISTATE TO ASK FOR HELP

im sorry for your loss
i also have a son that is a special needs child and is on dialyis
i have been on dialysis for 5yrs and he has been for 2yrs
we almost lost him 2yrs ago.

Its very hard but do-able. Trust me I know. I have 2 daughter 22 mths and 5 mths old. I don't really know what sleep is right now, but I wouldnt change it for the world. When the baby laughs it makes everything so much better, and when my toddler says mammy(mommy) love youuuuu... I melt. :P Try to stay positive, When i am down about it , I think well at least we have food, when i change the girls i think, At least i have a fresh diaper to put on them, some ppl have it much worse. there is always a pro to the con.... imo

I dont know the answer,my ex only sees our daughter once every two weeks and thats if she even turns up.

The life of a single parent..it can be hurtful to think that the other parent/"donor" does not or can not love your child, but the thing that gets me through is that I know that everything I do for my daughter is going to be what makes her a beautiful person. My daughter is autistic and it's VERY hard, especially now with all of the therapy cuts in AZ. Her father thinks that the state taking money monthly is his way of being her dad. But every day I drag myself out of bed and make the best of what I do have. You just need to tell yourself every morning "I am going to rock this parent thing and raise my baby to be a beautiful person" Your child loves you unconditionally and will love and respect you even more because they know that you struggled and never gave up on them.

Do the best that you can and NEVER talk about the absent parent. When your child talks about his/her father, keep everything you say positive or you will be the bad person.
Being a single parent is so hard in the beginning, but it is so rewarding in the end...just hang in there, it truly is worth it when you realize what a fine young man/daughter you have created all by yourself!! CAN YOU TELL THAT I AM A PROUD MOM?

Ya know...I'm 47 and have an 11 year old daughter..her father hasn't seen her since she was 2, so she doesn't remember him (which I'm glad about).
When she was 4 months old, she developed a terrible ear infection that lasted for 3 months...in and out of the pediatrician's office and 11 antibiotics later, I found out she had a rare blood disease that stripped her of her immune system. She was hospitalized for 2 months, had 3 operations in one week and was in critical condition.
I was told in order for her to have a chance, we would have to relocate to a place that had specialized doctor's.

At the time, I had a career in Property Management and was doing quite well...never needed for anything with NO help from her father what-so-ever! However, I walked away from my job June 18th, 1999 and never looked back!

We came to Georgia where she was hospitalized a second time for over a month...they thought she had leukemia. For 2 years I had to provide home health care for my daughter without leaving our home...I went from making 80,000/year to being on welfare in a matter of months. We struggled to find a way to survive...and we did!!
It wasn't pretty...it wasn't what I wanted our lives to be like..but God provided the means. Miraculously, after exhausting all efforts, she started developing her own immune system...everything was over, as though it had never happened (thanks to many family, friends, neighbors praying non-stop, I believe)..her health was restored and the nightmare was over, so I thought...
I was diagnosed with a neuromuscular disease that is progressively getting worse as I age...I went from having a wonderful career to being on disability
I've gone through my daughter's ill health, my ill health, a loss of a father, brother, our house robbed while we were in it on the night of my daughter's 4th birthday....let's just say we've had our share of tragedies but let me tell you this....

At the end of the day...when all is said and done..I thank God for the wonderful life we have together...we've survived the worst of the worst together...we shared good times...together...her father (whom I've never said an ill word about her entire life) is doing his own thing and missing out on the most wonderful daughter a person could have...and we get through THAT together...

she has never had to "do without", she smiles and laughs with me every day...and although I'm in a tremendous amount of pain every minute of the day...God has given me a reason to live and a beautiful child to share each and every moment of it with....

so...good luck finding the JOY in it all...my life was forever changed when I realized what God was doing FOR me and not what He was doing TO me!

that disgusts me!!

i had a daughter when i was 16 and a son when i was 22. i am a single mom still. i chose the wrong "men" to be with. my daughter is better off with no father then she would be with the one that she hasn't seen in 3 years. and as for my sons father, thats not the kind of man i want my son growing up to be like. so i know from going trough it myself. sorry honey but you picked a loser. enjoy your little one every moment of everyday. it's time to get tough. men are not what they were many years ago. you can't count on many of them these days. now don't get me wrong, there are still good men out there, however, they are getting harder and harder to find. one thing that keeps me going is knowing that GOD wont give me anything that i can not handle. i hope that you can find some comfort, strength, and courage in that as well.

Sam, we all have a story and I don't need to share mine with you. You're right, it's hard. You don't have to do it all alone. You could have aborted, you could have put him up for adoption...You chose this. Once you realize that your life is a choice, I think it becomes easier. There is a great book called "The courage to be a single mother". You should read it. Being a single mother is difficult but manageable. Find and use your resources. Partner with other single parents. Where there is a will, there's a way. You are a mother, it's what we are made of.

I wouldn't spend another minute thinking about your son's father. He's not your concern. You and your son are your only worry. You will find friends, great advice and real concern here. Good luck to you.

C

I can soooo relate to most of the posts here. My daughter is 6. It has been a rough but AWESOME road with her. I am actually sad she is growing up so fast. I would never take back a second. I had a rough time until I embraced the fact that she is ALL MINE!! I can not imagine my life without her.

I put my self thru school, I am buying my own house now, and its just me and her. I am happier then I have ever been. Being happy about being a strong independant person is more rewarding then dwelling on who you dont have to help you. You have the person you need- your child!!

Best advice I can give anyone going through this type of situation is forget about what the other parent is not doing. All it does is take valuable time away from what you could be doing. When things are all done and said and the kids are grown they will see and know who was there and who was not.

When one sits and ponders and gets all upset due to what the other parent is not doing all it does is take away from what that one could be doing instead. Don't let it...........easier said then done I know that fully been there done that raised 2 by myself.... It can be done and more rewards in the end then one can image.

We make that choice to be a parent therefore instead of being so focused on all the things the other parent will not do or refuse to do let it go and be the best parent you can be. For I assure you in the end that is what will matter............

Girl let me tell u a little secret, they always wanna play but so few can be a winner! My daughter just turnd seven and has seen her dad for two hours her whole life. We have to b mommy and daddy then men ask why were so mad! Lol.