Dear Lilith

The problem began when you tried to cook yourself a coffee. WTF is that all about? You dont cook freaking coffee, you freaking nutcase.

The problem continued when you were driving along, paying little care and attention for your safety or anyone elses. You should have TWO hands on the wheel, and not be distracted by trying to drink a cup of coffee. That is just stupid and disrespectful. If i were a judge i would give you 6 months in the slammer. You were lucky you only spilt it on your lap, i hope next time it takes a layer of skin of your face, you potential murderer!

Dan

You are totally right. I gasp in the tremendousness that is your power.

Dear Danno-flim-flammo-tingo-tango-

Is it true that all younger British males (or in your case, retired octogenarian British transsexuals) all aspire to be like Jeremy Clarkson (of "Top Gear" fame), from his somewhat awkward state-of-dress to his thinning-yet-curlier-than-a-brillo-pad hair-do, to his thin-on-the-bottom-thinning-up-top-and-rotund-in-the-middle frame?

Signed,
The Stig

Dear MOOOOOoooooooF

The short answer is no.

Jeremy Clarkson does inspire much masturbation amongst the younger male population in the UK, but it is purely a fantasy thing. few people actually try to be like him.

Dan

Dear Dan

Why is that I sleep through the night and have no dream memories? I am still acheiving astral travel, and is there information comes in my sleep I am un aware of at this point? Or am I just not even dreaming? what is happening to my mind?

Not sleepless in Utah

Dear Lid

If you want to acheive astral travel, become an astronaut. Don't believe in all that other mumbo jumbo. Dreams cannot predict the future or anything, that is just silly.

Dan

doh

Thanks Dan! That makes a lot more sense than 42

Dear Dan-o-wanno-flip-flop-

I gotta friend who's got an old-school Jaguar J-Type, and it's constantly giving him trouble... no matter what he does to get the thing to run right, it... well... won't.

Why is this?


Signed,
Mr. Bean

I guess I shall just have to wait and see if I can find one of these endangered species you speak of. No chance of the other in this lifetime. P.S. If you find any - can you point them in my direction?

Yes, but it also requires a greater amount of washing.

Dear Dan,

Why are there so many mean and stupid people?


Wondering In America

Dear Moof the Pooof

The Jag can tell by the size of your friends arse that he is an American. Being British it likes to give you guys a hard time. There is nothing you can do but accept it.

Dan

Dear Meg

No i cant. The arthritis in my fingers means i will probably point them in the direction of someone standing next to you by mistake.

Dan

Oh, well...such is my luck

Dear Lid

Because people are mean and stupid. Look at what happened in Nazi Germany.

Dan