They very seldom jail them nowadays. How can they work if you jail them. They take away their license and stuff like that.

k

Here is how it works if you jail them:

They are prosecuted, incarcerated, and then their lazy selfish asses are released on court supervision. It is a condition of their supervision that they work and pay child support or they go back to prison.

That's how it works in my state, and I see it all the time. It's another reason why many people do not go to prison for other crimes. If they are supopsed to pay child support, the judges do not want to incarcerate someone as the kids would suffer. They must weigh the safety of the community with the needs of the children.

obviously you did not read the complete post

and the numbers may be accurate i do not know

i was speaking theory not specifics

i am insulted you would be insulted with out reading the entire post
and without out offering a chance to explain it

i am also insulted by your post that said this was a male female issue

if you want specifics on the numbers ask dhs what they are

and would you ask your kids to read your post
"""""""Do you mean the diaper changing in the middle of the night, the sick kid in the middle of the night? Driving them everywhere they need to go? Cooking their meals, shopping for and washing their clothes? Taking care of their schedules and more.""""""""""""

i wonder how they would feel if you really felt that way

and the reason you know only women in this situation again is because of the discrimination against men our age at the time of their divorce

-----
from my post
"If you want their money stay married"
your post
That's just wrong!!!!!

why is it you did not include the abuse exception line (insulting to me again)

so are you saying marriage and kids are a form of legalized prostitution that surprises me

although i know of several women that have had kids for the sole purpose af recieving child support

so maybe yer right

i am sorry you are insulted but at least i am not in a position to implement the way it is done

and i am insulted by those that have that power

child support should be a specific amount no matter what the noncustodial parent makes --- and it should only be enough to cover the childs expenses

if this was the case the custodial parent would be less likely to try to alienate the other parent as they would be needed in the childs life for other things

and if one knows what they will get for child support and it is not a large amount maybe there would be fewer single parent homes


and i do appreciate you giving me reason to go into this a little deeper

Thanks for explaining it to me Dragoness and Winx

Adj4u,

I've read your previous posts over many months regarding child support. As a single parent I very much disagree with them.

Ask my child to read the post? My child already knows how much work I do to take care of them by myself 24/7.
You described the fun that someone is missing. I described the work that they are missing. There is nothing wrong with the way I feel about it. Being a parent is work.

I don't understand what you're saying about prostitution. I feel it's wrong to stay married just for the extra income.

You said, "Child support should be a specific amount no matter what the noncustodial parent makes --- and it should only be enough to cover the childs expenses."

A child costs more then their "seen" expenses. The house has to have an extra bedroom, utilities are higher, more gasoline to drive them around. Their friends need presents when they have birthday parties. The child has a birthday party. I could go on and on.

Child support, IMO, doesn't even come close to half of what it costs to raise a child. I don't think that influences the amount of single homes.

I posted an organization that helps men with problems of support and custody. Fathers for equal rights. Yes there are alot of dead beat dads. Yes there are dead beat moms. You have to understand their are men willing to do the right thing but are made a pawn of the system. I personally have tried to use the CSEA to get paternity done of my child to only be turned down. Her mother was on welfare at the time. Now no one can tell me if she was pointing the finger at me they would not have made me do the paternity. It took till my daughter was 10 to get my right established. Again this was 10 plus years ago and I would hope the system is still not so backwards. All parents need to take responsibility for their child. Now you all can think that men dont get screwed by the CSEA but I will tell you you are wrong!!! There I said it and am probably gonna regret it but it is a fact that I will show anyone proof that asks for it!!! Winx,Fran and others I hope you know mw by now not to pull punches and stretch the facts for my favor!!!!

Happy Festivous

those things you listed are extra activities

they are not needed to support the child

presents for their friends are not necessary for them to live --- they could ask for the other parent to get it (if they had a relationship with them)

you know it is easy to disagree

lets here some ideas

what about the married couples that can not afford these extra things where would the money come from for those kids

if it is better for the kids to get these things then let the other parent have them

until you have an alternate idea just saying you disagree does not cut it (lets here an idea not an arguement)

i know you are a very intelligent lady and can come up with an idea

but most of the things you listed backs my point you say he should give you enough money for the extras i disagree

if the child wants extras then he should get them from money other than the child support

and if the parent truly feels the child needs these extras then they will want to keep the other parent in the childs life -- instead of trying to use the child as a weapon against them


again an idea not a disagreement

The following is true and is a form of abuse to anyone who lives in America and sees it....It proves how very wrong things are when our children have a price on their head....and the courts grant it...How sad....
Last month, the New York State Supreme Court's Appellate Division approved an increase from $5,000 to $21,782 per month to P. Diddy's ex-girlfriend, Misa Hylton-Brim Representatives of both P. Diddy and Hylton-Brim say it's the highest child support payment in state history.

In an interview with The Associated Press Tuesday, the hip-hop mogul vowed to appeal, saying the case was an attack on his character.

"It's not about money. I don't care how much money I have," he said. "If you come at me and say I don't take care of my child, I'm going to take care of that to the end."

He vowed to take the case to the Court of Appeals, the state's highest court.

In addition to child support, P. Diddy said he also pays for his 11-year-old son Justin's health insurance, tuition, vacations, clothes and other items, for a total of about $120,000 per year.
Related issue.......
Last year, Hylton-Brim sued P. Diddy seeking $35,000 a month in child support while she was divorcing the father of her other children.

Personally Mile I found everything you have posted on this matter to be nothin but crap. You are arguing with everyday hard working people and brought some over paid hollywood star into it. I have stated my problems with CSEA just to show it does happen. Not to say men or woman should not support their kid. If you dont want to support your child then get the fffnnn fixed!!!

Aja my friend. Even in a the majority of marriages it takes 2 incomes to support the family. They is alot more to raising a child than just feeding, clothing and providing a home for one. What I stated what had happened to me but I agree with winx and others about child support. I have had my daughter by myself and know there is always something that needs done. If the mother and the father would just be honest with one another and work together it would be in the best interest of the child. But you and I know thats dosnt happen. Can you blame all fathers no! Can you blame all mother no!

again no suggestions

tempt you know better

than to say something like that to me

if you want to disagree fine

you also say the system is wrong yet you offer no suggestion

many non custodial parents can not afford to be with their kids the way the system is set up

till you or anyone else can offer a suggestion yer just spitting into the wind

at least i am trying to keep both parents in the childs life

what about the cost for the non custodial parents to live
they have housing and such as well

they are to supply half of enough for the child to live that is all they should be forced to pay

i do not care if you think they need to buy a friend a bday present or pay so they can be in some club or sports team those are not necessities

if the child wants the extras keep both parents in theoir lives and quit using thm for leverage

anything other than necessities need to gotten beyond the support order if you want the other parent to get them do not be a pain in their azz and they will still be their most of the time

if you need more after a 6 month period because the other is not staying involved file for an increase

but if it is proven the custodial parent is making it difficult for the other parent they lose custody
and
if the child does not want to go and it can not be proven the parent is abusing them then they get no extras from the non custodial parent

they do not deserve them

and as for medical bill those should always be the custodial parents obligation after all they are the ones in charge of the childs lifestyle

i have yet to see an option to this other than saying i am wrong to say these things

but everyone says the system is messed up

so step up and give some suggestions quit wimpin out

"If the mother and the father would just be honest with one another and work together it would be in the best interest of the child."

Its the "only system" that will work for the child!!!!

When you allow the system into it its going to be that way. That is my only answer! Take the system out of the equation.

Aja you know I meant no disrespect.

Thats the only way the best interest of the chils will be obtained..JMO

that is what i said if you reread my posts you will see that


give minimal support court ordered just cove necessities if they want the child to have the extras in life

they will be forced to work together

the child will no longer be used as a weapon

if the other parent disappears at no fault of anyone but themselves then have the support issue readdressed


reread my last post completely

you will never have the system work with out a system in place

if you do not want to pay more stay in their life

if you want more for the child keep the other parent involved

reread my post please

yer losing you hummingbird status on this issue

Im apoligize..

The system is the problem. People know how to use it to get what they want. Im not saying all people do!!! Please understand that Winx

Parents should be forced into counseling if a divorce is to accrue. MANDATORY!!! Work out the differences or no divorce will be granted.

If unmarried the same should apply. If a paturnity is established,Made to sit your azz down and work it out! If you dont want to you will be held in contempt and put in jail until you do.


That in my opinion is the only way to get "In the best intrest of the child"

The courts can not determine each case. All cases are different. Thats why you have what you do.

Force the people to take the system out of the equation!!!!

Do I get my humming bird back?

Templter,
I only threw that article at this subject to prove what selling our children leads to..GREED NOT NEED!!!
by the way are you more of a man than P.Diddy ,or maybe you pay more taxes than him, ...to me his child is as important as yours and if it can happen to the rich like that ,then what is happening to the lawyer less men in courtrooms everywhere.
There are horror stories abound over this subject and it is not a matter of monies so much as our losing our ability to live without the government telling us how much our children are worth..If you spent the monies the government spends on incarceration of deadbeats on the children ...it would be monies well spent...
To clarify my position for you ,I believe good parents do not need any court order and the penalty for being a deadbeat should not be jail..By definition ...Debtors prison is defined as follows ...a place to incarcerate till one comes up with money...In America , we lock regular folks up with all kinds of felons and folks ,that ain't right...
Templter, I know nothing about you but please do not take anything I have said on this subject lightly until you have the years built up that I have at trying to get the legislature to recognize fathers rights..

i think that is a good step 1

i doubt if you will ever be able to take the system out of the equation

but your idea is a good step 1 and a way to explain the circumstances of their actions

i still think little support at first work together to give the child the extras (the way this will work would be explained in the counseling*)

*read my last post to see how it works

the only way to keep both parents to keep the childs interests at heart is to punish them (both) big time when they screw up

hhhuuuuuummmmmmmmiinnnnnnnn

You are right!!! You do not know me or the situation I went through with my child. To assume anything just makes you a...I had to fight to get paternity established. Did you? I fought to get what I have with my child. Did you? I have been the sole supporter of my child for 10 years. Have you? To assume you know anything about me is wrong!!!!! I posted a great father org. called Father for Equal Rights..What have you posted?

PS Please dont take anything I have said lightly!

Aja, I see what you are saying and it makes sence. A hell of alot more than having a set amount for all. Thats crazy!!! I beleive the parents are the only ones who truly know what the best interest in the child is. When you put that in the courts hands that is when the **** hits the fan. If a woman wants to deny visitation the man can deny paying. But that has to be worked out between the two parties or you will always have the mess you have now!!!!!

if they refuse visitation with out a court order they lose custody

no if ands or buts

that is my point

it removes the child as a weapon of vengeance

All I have seen you do is belittle woman getting support and dont even to bother to ask the situation! Share with us all how you are going to single handley change every states family laws all by yourself. The Org I posted have been around for a long time w/ a heck of alot more resources and is nationwide...Plz enlighten us!!!