With er being an ex-vet, yes she is already on disability, from both social security AND from the va. The boys receive their ssd checks every month through my name whic helps out big time. BUT that is NOT child support, and was never intended by the social security office to act inplace of the child support.

As far as moving to another state that is more liberal on anything, that state has very little authority on the issue, as the case was decided in Michigan, and any changes still has to go through the same court that handled it originally (which is one reason I did it there too; Michigan is known for being a LOT better as far as equal rights ebtween the parents).

In th case of waiting a year, that is being taken care of now. She wrote the courts in september claiming she paid 1000 dollars in child support UP FRONT last october (which she did nto do) and as of right now the courts have cancled the garnishment on her income for the next year or so. I warned her ONCE that she needs to get it straightened out and resumed, as well as backpaid, and that if she doesnt I am taking it into court. Now I am simply waiting for that one year to appen, and if she doesnt get it straightened out, I am filingfor loss of all contact and everything else. But it will be with no more warnings to her.

and as far as her using the drugs ad such, if I thought it would actully do any good on either ide of te table, I would report her immdiately. However I am pretty much stuck between a rock and a hard place on that issue. However, if she ever gives me reason to think she is on something during a visit you can rest assured cops will be called and a report filed.

I can't top that but I can come close. I met my exwife in Oklahoma 6 yrs ago through her sister and was immediately taken in by her. I am the type to fall and fall hard regardless of the warning signs. During our first date, I discovered that she was still married but going through a divorce and had a son from that marriage whom the father had custody of. I also learned that she was on probation in Oklahoma for Embezzlement by employee, Theft, and Stealing a credit card. We started dating regardless of this and I met her family who were completely filthy people. Come to find out later they never paid their bills either. About two weeks after we met, we moved in together. She began cussing me, yelling and screaming, etc. I believe that people can change and at that time I believed I could change her. It did not end up like that. We had two children and then moved to Houston, TX to be closer to my family, as I was tired of her family asking for money. She gave birth to our third daughter here in Houston and everything seemed to be going well until September 2007. One day, I got up got the kids ready for daycare, took them to daycare, and went to work. After work I picked up the kids and went home and all the lights were off. She left a note on the refrigerator that stated she found out she was pregnant with our fourth child and she was losing her temper with the kids and was afraid she might hurt them. She moved to San Antonio with a coworker whom she had met two weeks prior to this who is also a lesbian. So I get an attorney in order to obtain custody and I get joint custody with her only having supervised visitation due to her threatening to hurt the kids. She had my youngest daughter in February 2008 and I drove to San Antonio to see her, and at the same time, my attorney was obtaining emergency custody of the child for me in court. While there the hospital staff advised me that my ex and her roomate appeared to be a couple. The hospital staff did not go into detail however I doubt it was anything sexual since my ex had just had a C section. So I got custody of all four of my daughters and my ex has only seen them five times in the last year and she is supposed to see them every other weekend. Come to find out my wife has been turned out and is now claiming to be a lesbian. So I am raising four little girls with the help of my family and I would not have it any other way. My ex has moved twice since living there and has had five different jobs. Oh and did I mention she has been turned out? That is my story take it for what it is worth.

You looking for her through a scope?

My wife passed away when my girls were 12 and 19. She had breast cancer that went to a brain tumor.

i just wanted to say i give serious props 2 all single fathers out there!!! im a single mom and have been for a while i have no help (finacialy or otherwise) and its hard as hell so men i know u go through it 2!!! there are good women out there (but like good men) they r few n far between but we are out there! i dunno bout lookin for my future ex husband but a good man will do haha just one question tho.... do u guys actually want a good woman or do9 u just say it bc it sounds good? bc all the good men r taken by horrible women which leave us gooduns w nuthin but kids....hmmm how does that work? but anyways keep up the good work daddies!!!!

Good for you! It is awesome to hear that you stood up for your rights and made her know that meth is not ok with that baby around ever.
My ex is a meth head and our son is 7. He is in prison right now for drugs and not taking care of his probation, etc, etc. He was not like this when we met but became this way because of bad choices in people and of course doing drugs. I didn't walk away like you did, I let him see him and that could turn out to bite me in the ass. He is saying all the nice jail sober things like I am going to take him every weekend when I get out if that is ok with you. HELL no that's not ok with me.
I don't even want to deal with him anymore but my son loves him so much.

How about this. I got my Ex pregnant while she was separated form her husband. She went back to him before our child was born. She gave my kid her married name making him the legal father. I tried from day one to have paternity proven but could not because there was "A legal father and only 3 people can contest a paternity. The legal father, mother or the child". I file a paternity action through the Child support enforcement agency like so many mothers do. They didn't even have the right forms for a father to do so. It took them about 5 years to finally say there was nothing the could do, even though she was on welfare and I had a good job with insurance. Neither she or her husband ever question me as the father and I help support her even though it was not ordered by the courts. Well she and her husband split up and the Child Support Enforcement agency went after him for support. He finally came forward and said the child was not his. My daughter was 11 yrs old by then. They finally did the paternity and proved I was her dad. The next things out of their mouth was past support I owed. I felt like I owed nothing but the judge, who was cool about it awarded her $5000 in past support. I was angry and said I would pay the very minimal I could. Well to make along story short, I offered her the $5000 if she would sign joint custody and let her live with whom she wanted. Well I have had her since then and she is a great kid...

wow i cant beleive they mad u pay that!!! well i guessi was luck my x wanted nuthing 2 do w our son he wanted drugs booze and the young life even tho he was 13 yrs older than me... he didnt wanna b a dad and i didnt want his money i take care of my son myself and ive never asked for a dime and we never spoke again.. he is on the birth certif. if i wanted money it would b easy but its not worth it... my son is wonderful only prob is he doesnt know what a daddy is and hes getting the age where he knows his friends have daddies... what do i do bout that??

i wish u all the luck n the world and give u yes it is very hard bein a sing parent and i know a lot of young guys stepin up 2 plate and doin what u have.i was a sing mom than met my now ex after 20+ yr's he got n 2 hard drugs drinking whores and all that go with drugs,and guess what at age 41 i became a sing grandma.took my grson cowboy from oldest girl when he was 3wks old,and he is now 12 and been rasing him by myself for 11yr's.so u just keep doin what ur doin and dont let what folks say,get u down keep up the good work my heart goes out 2 u dropn and say hey

Hi y'all. First post, but this looks like a good spot for it. I'm 32 yrs old with 3 kids. My ex and I got married right after she gave birth to our first child, 11 years ago. Money has always been tight, so it wasn't the perfect life, but we made due. A year and a half ago we got in an argument and I asked her if she really felt that way, did she want a divorce? She said yes, and moved out the next day. 1 week later, she started dating a mutual coworker. she now has a child by him. She sees our kids 1 sometimes 2 overnights a week, and pays NO child support. Divorce has not been filed, so I don't have a leg to stand on. I work for minimum wage, so coming up with legal fees for the divorce is tough. It won't be an easy one, as I want Full custody, since she left them and me. If we didn't live with my parents, there is now way I could survive by myself. The bright side of the story though - I have my kids 5 days a week :) Anyone in Springfield, IL that wants to apply for the job of present big sister, possible future second mom - let me know ;)

Jammer...

You need to file with child support. You don't, I repeat DO NOT need to go to court to file for and receive child support.

And just my two cents... I doubt anyone would apply for the job of future second mom... children only have one mother.

I wish you good luck.

After 11 years togather (9 of them married) My ex left me and the kids for another man. I thought our life was going good than bam. She asked for a devorice. We did not go to court she agreed to every other wensday and thursday. It had to be thoses to days because of her work. She has been gone now for 2 months and only kept the kids one night. She only comes done to see them at my house one day a week and only stays for 2 to 3 hours. She has agreed to everything I ask with out a fight. It seems like the kids are just in her way now and she is haveing more fun with out them. So here I am just trying to move on. The kids (2 girls) are doing ok and seem to be happy. The only thing they ever say to me about what is going on is when is mommy coming home? I just tell them not for a long time.

I have 3 boys, 21-18(downs) and a 15 yr old. the oldest goes to college away from home, other 2 live with me.
My wife died of breast cancer a year ago. We have things we have to face in life and nothing bites back as hard as life. You have to keep moving forward.

So true......good luck and god bless as you push forward!

I raised my daughter alone from the time she was 13 up until she graduated highschool and moved into her own place. I had absolutely no help from her mom as she went off to live the biker life with some "gentleman" by the name of "Tiger".
She still has made no attempt to contact our daughter, even though our daughter has made repeated attempts to contact her through my ex in-laws.
My hat's off to anyone trying to raise their kids alone.

I got married in 85. My son was born in 86 and my daughter in 89.Caught her cheating in 90 and divorced in 91.I did kick her out when I caught her. I got custody of both my kids and raised them on my own until I married again in 96. Caught her cheating in 03 and needless to say a repeat of the first.She kicked her daughter out while she was in high school and she came back to live with me and I got her to go to college.
My kids are doing very well and I remain single but have decided to look for someone to share good times with now that all the kids are grown.

Don't worry some beautiful thing is going to come along and want to be a part of all the single fathers lives and more importantly their children lives.

Ok excuse me for my ignorance but what does "turned out" mean?

The biggest reason why I left his mom, Isnt because she is a bad person, for the most part. The problem was that over a period of about five years I watched our relationship turn into one no different than my mother and fathers. Her mother and step fathers relationship wasnt any better. I wanted more out of life and after we discussed our situation we "both" agreed we should go our seperate ways. I fell for whole "break up sex" rutine, and a month later she told me I was going to be a father. I know that having a child was a poor reason to make a relationship work, but it seemed like a good reason to give it one last try. Needless to say the arguments got werse, and she became more violant. I am sure I looked like an idiot, just standing there, but I was raised a man should be able to take it. That doesnt mean I have to. My son was one month old when we moved out. He is seven months old now and I have been teaching him every thing I can. The most important lessons, he is learning are from the examples I set. So I intend to show my son what a happy healthy relationship is.

You sound like a great man and I'm sure your son will be to with a father like you. I wish you the best of luck