"I'm so fancy, you already know. Who dat who dat made you do that do that igg rock." I sing popular songs to her.

"I crashed my car into a bridge, I sat, I watched, I let it burn I don't care I love it! I don't care I love it!"

"it's like raaaiin on your wedding day!"

Rebel status dude!

Did I tell you about the rebel thing? I'm James Dean, rebel without a cause! I don't take orders from you! conformist rules pppshhh!

That's why you're always smiling huh?! Makes sense.

I tell her she always looks so nice, I love the way she dresses!

I tell her I love the way she undresses even more!

I show up. That works for me.

I take orders from no one, I post multiple ideas when asked to only post once cause I'm a rebel and chicks dig that!

Who said that?
You weren't there! I'm sure it was different.

I'm sorry but that means he wants to break up but doesn't want to say that. Do you have his brother or best friends number? If you want him back just have a polite conversation with one of them or just go out and meet another guy that makes you happier, one that won't play games like "breaks".

In my experience women are more shallow, always treating me like a piece of meat, always asking me to pick up things off the floor sometimes I feel like they glue that money to the floor so I have to bend over longer trying to get it! Then they "accidentally" slip and touch my you know... They tell me they need to inspect it but I think they are really getting a thrill from it.

Women do bad things to my innocent body.

Hammer, meet nail head. It's like that Beetles song "can't but my love" only "can't force my love" I'd listen to Larsonc, she's smart and a woman 2 things I always listen to.

I like that you make up your own facts! You don't have a clue what anything other than water is in spanish do you? "Cavarone" means nothing, "cabron" I'm sure however is what you've heard many times over the years, it doesn't mean playboy btw! It means something that will be censored ese!

I'm not sure even using quotes would help make sense out of who you're talking to here. Can other people see who you are speaking to? I'm going to assume you are accusing me of getting government checks due to being injured over seas... I haven't kept a dime from the government, I make my own way in this world and what a beautiful way it is, I've given every penny of my government checks to the families of my fallen men, I am lucky enough to not need them but I look down on no one that does, hard times fall on us all eventually. Whatever this redneck rain day thing is, I'm going to have to pass, I need to end up in a empty field with you and your friends like I need a hole in my head.

I'm glad we are on the same page... Just remember, if it's meant to be set her free and she'll find her way back if it's not meant to be set her free anyway. Don't give it the hose again. Have you done this before?

What?

Theres no way I'm reading all that, I'm going to assume it's crazy nonsense. Oh I'm right?! I like this game! I'm turning on my anti anti tracking software now half minuteman.

I'm waiting for the funeral home post. My job does help, everyone loves comics but let me know if anyone from a funeral home posts.

He wants me to tell you that he is pretty sure you are a spy for them... He requests you please turn him in to the authorities for being a spy as well as a great dancer (I'm not sure what that has to do with anything but I'm just the messenger) he also asked you to bring a pacifier when you and the other agents come, he wants a binky.

Jee I don't know, you sound so great I can't imagine what else she could possibly want! Some girls are funny about dating people when they know that the relationship ends badly, like with them in 5 trash bags. Maybe you should just focus on being a healthier you right now, ease up on the "it puts the lotion on the skin" routine.

You seem like a nice enough crazy person though. I got your message about how you want me to speak for you, I'm honored! I will post what you mean when I'm able to. They are watching you btw, they told me.

It makes more sense in crayon, crazy don't translate well into text sometimes. Let me try to translate though "I'm a very important man, Mexicans admire my home decor. I love Mexicans. Like alot! If I had it my way there would be no fence! I help them enter our country as one of my super spy duties, I'm so good at my job that you know who... Gives me top secret documents! I enjoy talking about these documents on dating forums, I'm very lonely. I'm very important and I have enough tinfoil to cover a ladies head so you know who... Can't read our thoughts. I like to masturbate with cactus, my Mexican friends call me prickle prick." I think that's what the crayon writing said.

I look for a woman with a wrist band from a hospital (preferably mental)
I look for signs of hard drug use.
I really want her to bring up her probation, parole officers or court appearance. Within the first few minutes of meeting.
What can I say I'm old fashioned.

Have you found anyones married auntie? I like that you are just you no matter how bad it makes you look! It's like screw karma, right? I like your humrsense as well and you should keep it up! Can I meet your married aunt? I wanna try too!