I would just take a break from it. After two months of getting nothing from it you must be pretty fed up with it. It can just become an OCD sort of habit after it stops being fun.

A lot of it is luck or perseverance but if you're not in the right frame of mind for it it just tends to get more and more frustrating. It's difficult. Experience has taught me not to expect much from it. I would also avoid anything long distance. If you go down that road you'll be endlessly searching profiles of people that are hardly likely to be interested in you and at least you're going to have some things in common with people from your part of the world and could realistically date them. That's basically it. It's a matter of finding someone that doesn't live too far away that you have stuff in common with, or can relate to. That can take a long time on a site like this.

I don't even know if "tragedy" is the appropriate term for a terrorist attack. It's almost offensive when the news media talk like that.

A "tragedy" is usually something more like an accident, or unforseen event. When apologists for the likes of the IRA called their terrorist attacks tragedies they weren't condemning those attacks and just saying that they were regretable.

A couple losing a child is tragic. It seems unfair but it's nobody's fault, or it was an accident. I guess people talk about things like the murder of JFK as national tragedies but there's an element of "not understanding why" in that case and possibly in the case of terrorist attacks and high school shootings. So to that extent there's an element of tragedy about them.

Dramatic irony consists in the actors being unaware of the forces conspiring against them. Likewise, you can consider the death of Princess Diana a tragedy if you portray her as the innocent lamb that went to the slaughter and entertain conspiracy theories about it and we (the audience) know what she didn't. It's after the fact but, "If only she hadn't got into that car" is something we can say with hindsight and the degree of the tragedy is measured by the consequences.

In reality it's measured by how many people are effected. A lot of people were effected by the death of Diana and a lot of people lose children. When other people have been effected by the same thing it's not just a personal tragedy.

Arguably the firework on the head incident was more stupid than tragic. It's a matter of opinion. One person might say that a young person dying from a drug overdose was a senseless and tragic event and someone else might say that they made their own choices and were just stupid and knew where it would all lead.

I could tell you a couple of stories though about women that were completely out of it when guys had sex with them. The difference is that a person that is unconcious, or is so intoxicated that they don't know what's going on, can't really consent to anything. There is admittedly a gray area though because a person can be really drunk and still do things that they are culpable for and capable of.

Asking if there's a difference between me going home with a woman that invites me to bed and me following a drunk home and then asaulting her is a silly question however. It's too vague and black and white.

What do you count as a sexual assault? Women rarely just invite you to come home with them and take their clothes off and lie down. The difference is between seduction and rape. A woman can complain that she was seduced but it's not a crime and not that different from a guy using being drunk as an excuse for going with some old slapper.

Also, your OP is question begging. Alcohol is irrelevant if a woman is attacked.

It is probably better to say that alcohol makes people more impulsive. They don't think through the consequences of their actions, or don't care about them.

Sex, by its nature, is an impulsive sort of thing. You have to be in the mood for it and it's a lot of people's idea of a fun night to have a few drinks and have sex. There's a reasonable expectation on my part that if a lady I'm dating comes round for a few drinks that she's up for it and that she wouldn't wake up in the morning, saying that I attacked her, although it might not have all been planned out and she may not have been in the mood at the start of the night.

Any substance that alters your mood or conciousness is going to effect your thought processes and behaviour. If they didn't, what would be the point in using them?

Yes, you can eat food that you wouldn't normally touch when your drunk. That's how they sell kebabs but you could call that a lowering of inhibitions.

The thing about inhibitions though is that some are quite irrational or are actual impediments and some are things that you wouldn't dream of doing when you're sober, such as shouting abuse at people, or putting a traffic cone on your head.

I know one guy that's so bad when he's drunk that nobody will put up with him but he's an alright guy when he's sober. He goes from crying on your shoulder to picking fights with people. The guy has serious problems and they tend to come out when he drinks. I don't think that's just about losing inhibitions. The drink effects his mood and he can become agressive and one compulsory behaviour that he's developed is that he keeps touching you when he's talking to you when he's drunk.

I think it's a bit of both. Substances like alcohol intensify moods and an obnoxious drunk is arguably just uninhibited but that doesn't really explain how someone can be a perfect gentleman when he's sober and then a raving maniac after a few drinks. It's more that some people can't tolerate certain substances. Sometimes they can initially and enjoy using them but that can change. There are people, for example, that develop psychosis or neurotic symptoms after using a substance for a long period of time and that goes beyond normal effects like merely losing some inhibitions.

Well, I'm pretty fed up with it myself just now and it hasn't led to a lasting relationship but I can't agree that it's always bad.

In theory I could meet somebody from here today and it could lead to some sort of relationship, or just be better than spending the day on my own. I don't expect that to happen today but it has before when I haven't expected anything.

Maybe you just have too many expectations. I no longer have any and that way you can't be disappointed with what you get from it.

Yes. I am.

Yes and no. Just doing this has taken me out of my comfort zone and getting out and meeting people again was one of the things I needed to do to try to get out of my rut.

Unfortunately, the flipside has been that I've not done other things that I could have been doing to try to improve my situation because when it doesn't work out with somebody, that's depressing and you can lose your motivation or enthusiasm.

I consider the three years or so that I've been on here to have been an adventure. Some might say misadventure but I've felt better about my life when I have been dating, even when it hasn't gone very well and it looked doomed. I no longer feel optomistic about it and it becomes a habit. I feel that after the last year and what happened then it's like an episode in my life that I should draw a line under and that I should try something else now or just give up.

Wow, that's quite a diatribe there Joyce and it's going to take me ages to respond to all of that point by point where I find it comprehensible enough to say anything more apart from, "Huh? Are you drunk?"

""But" so and so is mean to me all my life. Actually a lot of so and so's that have put up with his abuse for years and still try to include him activities the rare moments he is sober by his own admission."

Don't know who you mean and I have long periods of sobriety actually.

"" if some recently departed girlfriend, in a series, had not abandoned him"

I wouldn't be feeling miserable but at least if it's a long series I'm getting plenty of poontang I suppose.

""But" professionals who has coped with the same disability and see legions of others become independent mastering new skills is ALWAYS asking the impossible."

It's not the same disability if one man is blind and the other man is partially sighted but they don't treat you like an individual and they offer one size fits all solutions, as in my example of people grabbing my arm when I don't need or want them to do that.

"" of course a Mongrel from the pound is superior to a trained canine companion. And a emergency that everyone is suppose to come running and spend LOTS of money one because he did not protect said animal"

I told you that they wouldn't give me a trained animal but I want to have a mobility aid that I feel comfortable with and won't invite harassment. I have spoken to people that are completely blind and either have to use a cane or not go out and they've told me that they do get harassed when they use one but if you have a dog that doesn't really happen and people like dogs and my dog is a really nice friendly dog.

She was in my garden and a cat scratched her. I take her to the vet regularly and pay my own bills, thankyou. But did want somebody to take a look and see if she was seriously wounded and I have poor vision.

" he is being picked on because he was provided a flat he could afford because it was not a posh enough neighborhood. Something he abandoned and displaced his family to cater to him for years longer. Evidently not good enough since he is now in anohter residence."

No. I had to get out of there and I went back to my parents' home for about a week until my landlords investigated to confirm that it was harassment and they offered me another flat in a different area and the rent is the same and it's still just a council scheme and not a posh area at all.

I didn't displace my family. My mother was working in a hospital near my home and if she hadn't stayed with me during the week she would have to have done a lot of traveling to work every day. It was a mutually beneficial arangement, as I said and I used to visit them at weekends in the village where they live, which was my grandparent's house.

I mentioned my grandfather before. He was the man that shot a German in the "great war".

"" he does not like the meals he is delivered or treated to in various places. Even when other's pay."

Well, it's supermarket crap that they bring me but I'm a single guy and it's edible I suppose. I like the food fine when we go out to restaurants but can't really enjoy it if I'm sitting there with an uptight person that's upsetting me by going on about my problems or nagging.

I told you that I saw a shrink about anxiety in the past and when I feel anxious I can't eat because I feel like I'm choking on my food. I do sometimes drink beer to help me relax though and there's a difference between medicinal use and abuse of alcohol.

"" expecting and aged parent with a disabled spouse to always attend him, a grown adult first before others is fair"

No. Not always and I never said anything like that. Straw man argument.

My dad's not deaf. He's just an old man and his hearing and sight isn't as good as it was when he was a young man but he wouldn't like you calling him disabled because he now wears reading glasses and he can't hear a pin drop. He can hear you well enough if you're not trying to speak to him from another room and don't mumble.

""But" a sister is suppose to be his life long slave to the exclusion of her own children."

Not at all but it would be nice if she would talk to me occasionally at least or do something to be a nice sister to me, rather than completely excluding me from her life and I only ever see her at family gatherings, which are few and far between.

""But' his brother is the same failed adult because he is dealing with his own problems."

Well, I don't want to say much about my brother here but I am glad that he's trying to get his act together now and I was the one there for all of those years giving my mother support when he was a junky and I was there for him when he was suffering from severe mental health problems.

"" he is not and addict to drugs or alcohol but he considers both a necessity over food or a minimally paid chore worker to prevent him from living in filth and goes on week long benders with money he begs off his mother when he has his own."

No. It's my money and she just goes to the bank for me because it's hard for me to use a cash machine and I had enough money to be able to buy both food and beer but I'm still dependant on my mother coming to see me and give me my money and she visits me once a week at the moment and wants to do those things, whether I would rather do them myself or not. It's nice of her to do it on the one hand but on the other I want control over my own finances and not her giving me how much of my own money as she wants to and telling me that I'm going to go broke if I keep smoking dope and drinking, even though I've got a few grand in the bank and live within my means.

Yeah, this place is a bit of a shithole at the moment but I can't be bothered to do much housework to make the place nicer when I've not got a girlfriend and I did say that I'm waiting for my landlords to do work on my kitchen, bathroom and heating and I'll get the place decorated and sorted out then.

"" he is being picked on by someone who has repeatedly referred him and explain the systems, the realities, and how too's of living well as an independent disabled adult from personal and professional experience; and resorts to name calling and outright lies because he can not remember who has said what to him."

I assume that you're talking about yourself here. Well, it's true that I don't always read all of your posts. Many people don't. Perhaps it would be helpful if you could give the ocasional TL; DR version.

You were the one jumping into this thread and bringing up personal things about me and attacking me and posting off topic inflamatory remarks is the definition of trolling.

I have absolutely no idea what lies you mean but you are certainly full of BS.

I lost my sight when I was twenty eight and I'm forty six now, so no, it's not like that and when it happened all those years ago and I tried to cope without my family and went to social workers and charities they weren't very helpful and couldn't wait to close the case, as I said.

The social worker did help me to get a flat and I thought that I could make a new start there but when I tried a white stick I got harassment from kids. They threw stones at me and when I called the social worker and told him that I had to get out of there he just said that I would get that anywhere and that he thought that I should just stay where I was. So, I had to go back to my family for help and I got another flat somewhere else and my mum stayed with me for a few years, like I said and it was a mutually beneficial arangement.

I've been turned down for a guide dog twice and they won't give me one. I'm either not blind enough or don't know how to play the system, or they don't help people like me that they can't treat like a child. I asked another charity for help and they have "befrienders" but because I don't like people grabbing my arm and pushing me about and complained about that they refused to take me anywhere again.

I am not completely blind and can get about without bumping into things but I still have mobility problems because I would, for instance, need a taxi driver to get me to that guy's door and ring the buzzer for me if I did go there and if I did need to go to the toilet in the cinema, or any place that I didn't know where it was, somebody would have to show me the way.

What I did was to just get a rescue dog and put a harness on him and that lets people know that I have sight problems but I don't get the harassment that blind people get when they use a cane. That dog died eventually, as I said and when I got over the depression of that loss I got another dog and that's the dog that I have now and I go everywhere with her and that works fairly well. It has been a case of having to do it on my own though and with some help from my family.

I would still have to ask people for help though and the thing is, if you go into a shop, for example, they aren't usually that helpful and don't have much patience if you keep asking them what colour shoes are and how much they cost and that sort of thing. So, it's better if someone like a friend or family member takes me out if I want to buy clothes or whatever.

Saying that I act like a petulant child is kind of insulting. I've had to take that rubbish from my father for years every time I complain about them treating me like a child and of course that makes me angry.

He's the one with the anger problem though, like I've said and given you examples of it. It's not just my girlfriends he criticises. He sneers at everything that I do or like and it has been like that since I was a child and yes, you could call it a Freudian relationship and of course my upbringing has shaped my personality.

If family therapy was an option and we could sit round a table and talk about it that would possibly be helpful but there's no way my father would do that. Supposedly he's sorry about the incident last week but I just hear that from other people in the family every time he acts like an arsehole towards me and we fall out. He won't even pick up the phone and talk to me. Neither will my sister.

When my mother was here today she said she just had a text from my sister, saying that she hoped that I was feeling better but she doesn't really care about me and she just says these things to my mother because my mother cares and gets upset when my mother tells her about stuff like this.

I can talk to my brother sometimes now and I did talk to my mother about how I'm feeling today but the way it is in my family we don't talk to each other and everything goes through my mother, down to even inviting me to this naming ceremony for my niece, which I don't intend to go to now because the last time I went to one of those when she had her first baby I had people asking me how I feel about being an uncle now and all I could say was that it doesn't really mean anything to me because my sister never calls or visits me and the last time she asked me out for a meal it was just because she wanted something from me.

I have tried with this family and I have practically begged that sister of mine to spend a bit of time with me and build a proper brother-sister relationship but she's not interested.

Like I said, I've been inviting my parents out for dinner on a regular basis for at least a year now but my father even complains about that and only comes because my mother tells him to. I've tried for years to get on with him and it's always me having to talk about things that he is interested in, like movies, because he only sneers at my interests, or gives me the stony silence.

Yeah, maybe talking with strangers on the internet like this is therapy but I don't want to go and see some professional that isn't personally involved because it's just talk and what I need is practical help, or a genuine friend to be there for me. I don't have that just now because the girl that I liked isn't calling me anymore and that's why I'm upset.

I had no other friends and I'm lonely. Of course I look to my family for support when nobody else cares at all. I can talk to my mother and she does but has too many other commitments now to help me with much. She used to live with me during the week when I lost my sight and it was convenient for her because she was still working then and it was less traveling for her and I've told her that I'll never forget that time that we had or that last day with my old dog when we had to take him to be put down but that's in the past and now I have to get on with my life on my own and it is different when you have a disability and when there are things that you simply can't do unless you ask people to help you.

It's kind of BS to call that ever becoming independant and it is easier to accept help from family or friends or a partner than going out there and having to ask strangers , even when your family treats you like a child or your girlfriend does and it leads to arguments.

That's not fair either. I don't expect them to drop everything. The last time I asked them to come to my aid it was an emergency and my dog had been attacked and I wanted them to see if she was injured and take her to the vet if necessary. I wouldn't have asked them to come otherwise and even then my father acted like it was a huge inconvenience.

Also, my brother told me that my father didn't want to take me to the cinema last week if I had a beer first not because of drunkenness but because I would have needed someone to show me to the toilet so that I could pee. That's how much he resents doing anything for me and how selfish he is.

My mother's other commitment today was to feed a neighbor's dog. I asked her why my father couldn't do it. Silly question really. He resents doing anything for anybody apart from my sister.

I don't want help from people that resent it or treat me like crap and that's why I don't accept charity or have anything to do with social workers.

Anyway, this is all completely off topic and I guess I'm done with this thread now because I don't apreciate being told that I need to see a shrink or go to AA or any of that crap when all I asked was what gives them the right to criticise my girlfriends and stick the knife in when I'm feeling depressed about a relationship not working out and I've had those answers from posters that wanted to reply to that and not criticise my lifestyle or insult me.

I'm in denial about nothing. I'm a binge drinker and I binge on cannabis when I can get it. Where there's a health issue is that if I don't control it and sober up like any sensible drinker it makes me ill and I suffer terrible pain and could even die.

I think that it's not alcoholism to just drink at weekends, or occasionally, or you could call anyone that likes a beer an alcoholic. You're attacking me again about this because of what I said in your army thread but you were the one telling me to have a beer and that that would make me forget about that girl when I started posting again.

I don't drink every day and even if that wasn't bad for my health I do things to occupy my time when I'm not drinking that I need to be sober for. Lately I started playing a game on the internet again and that takes my mind off my problems and I mostly just smoke normal cigarettes when I'm doing that. I've just lost enthusiasm for that just now because I'm feeling depressed but I don't have chronic or clinical depression.

It was like this the last time it didn't work out with a woman. I spent most of Christmas just drinking and smoking myself into oblivion because yet again I thought that at least I have my family and could have a nice Christmas with them but my father ruined that by coming into my house and giving me a lot of abuse about the music I was playing on my stereo. He's a hypocrite. He's half deaf now anyway and I can't even sit and watch a movie with him in his house because he always has the sound turned up to full volume but I don't go into his home and give him s**t about that because it's his home and that would be abusing his hospitality.

It's another example of them thinking that they can treat me like a kid anyway and he certainly wouldn't act like that towards my sister.

I just had a visit from my mother anyway and at least she brought me some cash, so I won't starve but yet again, she couldn't take me to the bank so that I can get that sorted out because of some other commitment she made.

Yeah, I had the shakes when I woke up because I've been drinking for a week but that's not normal and I would love a joint right now and getting stoned would make me feel better for a while but I'm not planning to go and see that dealer today, even though I could and have enough cash to buy enough to last me for at least a week now.

If I was the addict you say that I am nothing would stop me and I could get a taxi there but I'll go and see him when I'm in a better frame of mind and feel like going there. I'll go out today though because I need to buy food and I go out every day, however crappy I feel because I have a reason to, which is that I have a dogand taking care of her gives me some purpose in life, even when I feel like that's all that I've got.

Now please stop posting off topic personal attacks in my thread and go and troll somebody else.

Yeah, I can agree with that last post and whatever you say, PS, you are militaristic and come across that way.

Sorry if I'm not going to reply properly to your response just now but it was the usual TL; DR waffle and all that you can do is keep saying that I only know druggies, so I stopped reading at that point.

Well, I suppose because I'm not as actively involved with the war machine as you are I can't claim to have known many of them. There was my grandfather I suppose and he fought in the first world war and shot a German and was shot in the head by that German and got medals but just put them in a drawer and never wanted to talk about it. I also grew up during the Thatcher era when mass unemployment and fascism was the order of the day and the army is a job that promises you world travel and job training when you have no other prospects and things haven't changed that much since then really.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvWaRcQfOiQ

Alright. I'll try to explain it to you because you don't know me and it wasn't me bringing up the fact that I'm disabled here but I've "alluded" anyway, as you're putting it.

I have sight problems. I don't suffer from clinical depression and even though I have had problems with anxiety in the past I did see a shrink then and did other things to deal with that and I am no longer on medication and haven't needed that for years now. It's situational depression and there's nothing wrong with my brain.

No, there isn't a social worker and I'm a bit reluctant to even get started on that because when I developed sight problems and went to them for help they treated me like crap and couldn't wait to close the case and wash their hands of me. They won't even give me a home help to come round and help me clean my house but they will do that for alcoholics, like a guy I know.

I have literally nobody to go to that will help me with anything that I want help with unless I pay them to do it. That's the way that it is and my landlords have finally got around to sorting out my kitchen, bathroom and heating but I'll have to pay somebody to move and store my stuff while that's being done and pay somebody else to decorate and refloor after that's been done because even though my brother says that the family or he would like to help with that it's just BS and although I get on alright with him now and even called him today to talk about this situation he's got problems of his own that mean that he can't even come and visit me, let alone do anything practical to help me apart from introducing me to a dope dealer.

I did talk to him about it though and he then called my mother and she called me and I told her how I felt and what I wanted now in the way of her giving me back what's mine and letting me run my own life from now on. It's just basic stuff like getting a phone that I can use and having control over my own finances and mobility issues when I want to go out, or need to.

Yeah, I've been drinking for about a week now to just get through the day but I'm not alcahol dependant, in the sense that I'm an addict that can't stop. The same goes with the cannabis and I'm just really fed up just now and drinking to blot it out when I'm going through a really rough patch and because a girl that I liked doesn't want to know me anymore and I'm socially isolated and have nothing better to do just now, or feel so crap that I don't have the motivation or enthusiasm to do anything productive with my time. I know that I can't go on like this but at this particular moment it's how I'm coping with it.

Yeah. It's gone on for years and for far too long and I suppose because my mother was always there for me in the past and because nobody else cares at all I've let it go round and round with them doing things like going to the bank for me and bringing me groceries and because I hate being dependant on them for things like that and how they seem to believe that they can treat me like a child it keeps coming to a head and we fall out.

Then when I've told my mother that I want to do things for myself now, she'll sort of agree and even say that she'll help me to do those things that I need to do to become independant but she doesn't because she's either more interested in her grandchildren now, or just likes having the control over my life that she does.

Yes, she worries about me and is concerned about me but even when things are going reasonably well in my life now and I'm feeling happy she still nags and can't just be happy for me about the things that are making me happy. I really have tried to be a good son and for the last year I've been going out for meals with them, when they've had days off from their babysitting. It's not enjoyable doing that anymore though and they have literally ruined what I only want to be nice outings by sitting there nagging so much, or just being nasty that I couldn't eat my food.

Another thing that's changed recently is that my brother has finally done something about his problems and that makes me the black sheep now because I still like beer and cannabis, which isn't as bad as what he was doing.

It came to a head again on Friday anyway. My brother has wanted to go out to the cinema as a family outing since last year and my parents finally managed to find time in their busy lives to do that. It started on the phone before they even got here, with my mother nagging and making what should just be a nice day out into a drama. She said that my father wasn't prepared to take me if I had a beer first, so I said fine and that I wasn't coming then because I had already had a beer. It's not like I'm even an obnoxious drunk. It's just them disapproving because they don't drink anymore and are a pair of uptight sobersides and control freaks.

Don't get me wrong. I feel awful about this and this has happened before after it's not worked out with a woman and when I needed my family or a friend to be there for me. They aren't really though and all I'm getting from them is a few minutes every week when they bring my shopping round and these meals out that aren't even enjoyable and that they turn into dramas and agree to begrudgingly.

It may be the case that they're getting too old now to do things for me but I fail to see how looking after two small children that aren't even theirs isn't more tiring and that's maybe it. They have the right to enjoy finally having grandchildren but that must take most of their energy and I'm little more than an inconvenience to them now that they don't really have much time for.

I do feel a bit bad about saying this like this on the internet and I wish that it wasn't like this but I have literally nobody to talk to now and am depressed about that girl that I was seeing not calling me anymore and just about my life and the way that it's turned out in general. I do intend to make those changes but it's not easy when I have a disability that makes simple things difficult and I've given my parents so much control that I'm sitting here right now, unable to simply change my locks and credit card because I don't even know my own banking details or have my own credit card and I've got money in the bank but not much left in my wallet.

I suppose one thing that you could do is to keep posting militaristic flag waving threads and maybe that would make them feel valued and appreciated.

The problem that I have with that though is that a lot of servicemen come back from wars feeling that the whole business was stupid and awful and the last thing they want to hear is how what they did was great from people that stayed at home and sent them there in the first place, whether they were politicians, or tax paying "patriots" like yourself.

It's a tricky question and I have settled for women that weren't exactly what I was looking for in the past and been in difficult relationships that didn't make me entirely happy. For me, it's better than being lonely though and I did try to make those relationships work and did develop genuine feelings for them.

A couple of years ago I got involved with someone and by the third week I found myself feeling that she wasn't right for me and I felt bad about that and that I was being too picky or something. Part of it was that I still wasn't over it not working out with another woman, even though that had been over for years.

So, it didn't work out and I felt heartbroken but there were a few things about her that made her not right for me. One of the main ones was that she was also still stuck on someone else, which is bad enough, although I didn't find that out until getting involved with her but she also told me that she wasn't ready for anything serious at the time and I stupidly thought that in time she would feel ready and she was giving me mixed messages about what she wanted.

Looking back on that fling now, she was kind of right for me at the time. I had a bit of fun at least and it helped me to move on. Then I met another one and there were red flags for sure but even though it seemed really unlikely to work out, I really liked her and the first date with her was really memorable and she made me feel good about myself again.

What I'm going to say next probably won't go down too well with the people reading this but this is kind of how I feel just now and looking back on recent relationships and going back to that one that it took me years to get over, I settled for her at the time when what I really wanted was a younger woman. It's a preference that I've had since I was in my thirties and could talk about them as younger women. I won't even look at a profile on here anymore if they're over fifty and even forties doesn't fill me with much enthusiasm. In the real world though I suppose that I could meet someone that isn't in my prefered age range and click with her like I've done before.

When I met the last woman that came into my life she seemed absolutely perfect and even though she doesn't want to be in my life anymore and kind of led me on and then just dropped me I don't really have hard feelings about her and the reality is that I can't have been what she wanted and she was the one not settling for me.

It's depressing. I met what I thought was the perfect woman for me and I wasn't good enough for her. It's done considerable damage to my self esteem and I've developed the mindset again that nobody wants me and that I would even just settle for a bit of casual sex because even though I've had women telling me plenty of times that I'm a nice guy and good looking and other nice things that we all want to hear I no longer believe it and it is a form of depression and I feel worthless and that it's all over for me and that the best that I can hope for is just another fling.

Also, it's certainly arguable that comparing incest and homosexuality like that is a false analogy. The gays can certainly claim legal rights and call you a bigot because you don't like what they believe that they are and are meant to be.

You don't deny that homosexuality is natural, on the other hand I suppose and that's the crux of your argument; fallacious as it might be. You can say that we're all sinners and that even being a sex offender or rapist is natural, or a murderer; or say that it's their upbringing or culture or however you want to explain it.

You are condemning homosexuality and incest in the same sentence though and saying that they're little different because you think they're both bad.

Where do you draw the line? If your child took a dump on your carpet and wrote what he thinks about you with his own feces on your wall would you still love him, even though he's showing nothing but hatred towards you?

It's patronising anyway. You don't accept people doing what they do but think that you can still even claim to love those people. Why? Would it make a difference if they weren't related to you? Do you love Nazis, or just not associate with them because they don't like people like you either?

You don't like a cliche, you say. You don't like overgeneralisations. It's alright if they're friends of yours, or family but not really alright. You think that incest is a sin and a crime but if it was your own children you could say that you hate perverts but some of your best friends or loved ones are perverts and you're not saying it to say that you hate perverts, or tar them all with the same brush. You are though and that's pretty much all that I have to say about this BS.

Well, well done for not seeing everything (or everybody) as either black or white. I hate so and so because of one thing about them" is kind of childish.

The fact still remains though that here you are, chatting away with people on the internet that you're prejudiced against in some way, if I can put it like that and thinking that you're a good person or Christian for being friendly with them and not shunning them as pariahs.

Given that you are a Christian you are not at liberty to cast the first stone, although you can appeal to athority when you want to castigate people but go ahead and continue doing that if logical fallacies are your thing.