by Ted Nugent

WACO, Texas (CNN) -- Zero tolerance, huh? Gun-free zones, huh? Try this
on for size: Columbine gun-free zone, New York City pizza shop gun-free
zone, Luby's Cafeteria gun-free zone, Amish school in Pennsylvania
gun-free zone and now Virginia Tech gun-free zone.

Anybody see what the evil Brady Campaign and other anti-gun cults have
created? I personally have zero tolerance for evil and denial. And
America had best wake up real fast that the brain-dead celebration of
unarmed helplessness will get you killed every time, and I've about had
enough of it.

Nearly a decade ago, a Springfield, Oregon, high schooler, a hunter
familiar with firearms, was able to bring an unfolding rampage to an
abrupt end when he identified a gunman attempting to reload his
.22-caliber rifle, made the tactical decision to make a move and tackled
the shooter.

A few years back, an assistant principal at Pearl High School in
Mississippi, which was a gun-free zone, retrieved his legally owned Colt
.45 from his car and stopped a Columbine wannabe from continuing his
massacre at another school after he had killed two and wounded more at
Pearl.

At an eighth-grade school dance in Pennsylvania, a boy fatally shot a
teacher and wounded two students before the owner of the dance hall
brought the killing to a halt with his own gun.

More recently, just a few miles up the road from Virginia Tech, two law
school students ran to fetch their legally owned firearm to stop a
madman from slaughtering anybody and everybody he pleased. These brave,
average, armed citizens neutralized him pronto.

My hero, Dr. Suzanne Gratia Hupp, was not allowed by Texas law to carry
her handgun into Luby's Cafeteria that fateful day in 1991, when due to
bureaucrat-forced unarmed helplessness she could do nothing to stop
satanic George Hennard from killing 23 people and wounding more than 20
others before he shot himself. Hupp was unarmed for no other reason than
denial-ridden "feel good" politics.

She has since led the charge for concealed weapon upgrade in Texas,
where we can now stop evil. Yet, there are still the mindless puppets of
the Brady Campaign and other anti-gun organizations insisting on
continuing the gun-free zone insanity by which innocents are forced into
unarmed helplessness. Shame on them. Shame on America. Shame on the
anti-gunners all.

No one was foolish enough to debate Ryder truck regulations or ammonia
nitrate restrictions or a "cult of agriculture fertilizer" following the
unabashed evil of Timothy McVeigh's heinous crime against America on
that fateful day in Oklahoma City. No one faulted kitchen utensils or
other hardware of choice after Jeffrey Dahmer was caught drugging,
mutilating, raping, murdering and cannibalizing his victims. Nobody
wanted "steak knife control" as they autopsied the dead nurses in
Chicago, Illinois, as Richard Speck went on trial for mass murder.

Evil is as evil does, and laws disarming guaranteed victims make evil
people very, very happy. Shame on us.

Already spineless gun control advocates are squawking like chickens with
their tiny-brained heads chopped off, making political hay over this
most recent, devastating Virginia Tech massacre, when in fact it is
their own forced gun-free zone policy that enabled the unchallenged
methodical murder of 32 people.

Thirty-two people dead on a U.S. college campus pursuing their American
Dream, mowed-down over an extended period of time by a lone,
non-American gunman in illegal possession of a firearm on campus in
defiance of a zero-tolerance gun law. Feel better yet? Didn't think so.

Who doesn't get this? Who has the audacity to demand unarmed
helplessness? Who likes dead good guys?

I'll tell you who. People who tramp on the Second Amendment, that's who.
People who refuse to accept the self-evident truth that free people have
the God-given right to keep and bear arms, to defend themselves and
their loved ones. People who are so desperate in their drive to control
others, so mindless in their denial that they pretend access to gas
causes arson, Ryder trucks and fertilizer cause terrorism, water causes
drowning, forks and spoons cause obesity, dialing 911 will somehow save
your life, and that their greedy clamoring to "feel good" is more
important than admitting that armed citizens are much better equipped to
stop evil than unarmed, helpless ones.

Pray for the families of victims everywhere, America. Study the
methodology of evil. It has a profile, a system, a preferred environment
where victims cannot fight back. Embrace the facts, demand upgrade and
be certain that your children's school has a better plan than Virginia
Tech or Columbine. Eliminate the insanity of gun-free zones, which will
never, ever be gun-free zones. They will only be good guy gun-free
zones, and that is a recipe for disaster written in blood on the altar
of denial. I, for one, refuse to genuflect there.

A newly married sailor was informed by the navy that he was going to be
stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the Pacific for a
year. A few weeks after he got there he began to miss his new wife, so
he wrote her a letter. " My love," he wrote " we are going to be apart
for a very long time. Already I'm starting to miss you and there's
really not much to do here in the evenings. Besides that we're
constantly surrounded by young attractive native girls. Do you think if
I had a hobby of some kind I would not tempted? "

So his wife sent him back a harmonica saying, "why don't you learn to
play this?"

Eventually his tour of duty came to an end and he rushed back to his
wife. "Darling" he said, "I can't wait to get you into bed so that we
make passionate love!"

"First let's see you play that harmonica!"

I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and
exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking
him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80 ?"

He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?"

"Oh no," I replied. "I'm not doing drugs, either."

Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"

I said, "No, my former doctor said that all red meat is very
unhealthy!"

"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf,
sailing, hiking, or bicycling?"

"No, I don't," I said.

He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?"

"No," I said. "I don't do any of those things."

He looked at me and said, "Then, why do you give a ****?"

AN OPEN LETTER TO
MR. JAMES THATCHER,
BRAND MANAGER,
PROCTER & GAMBLE.


February 6, 2007


Dear Mr. Thatcher,


I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years, and
I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or
Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa
dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach
in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your
revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough
to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell
you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16
in my pants.


Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from
"the curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is
starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces
violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body
will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call
"an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing?


As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've no doubt seen
quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers'
monthly visits from Aunt Flo. Therefore, you must know about the
bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood
swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize
it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend
Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into
a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's
Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of
all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal
maniacs in capri pants. Which brings me to the reason for my letter.


Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach
inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and
there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy
Period."


Are you ^%$#$%%# kidding me?


What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really
think happiness-actual smiling, laughing happiness-is possible during a
menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit
pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick
S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in
which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock
yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local
Walgreens armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life
in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man. If you just have to slap a
moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say
something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or
"Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?


Sir, please inform your accounting department that, effective
immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have
chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will
certainly miss your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your
brand of condescending b.s. And that's a promise I will keep.
Always.
Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin, TX

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss,
concerned about all his employees' well being, asked sympathetically,
"What's the matter?"

The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that
my mother had passed away."

The boss, feeling very sorry at this point, explains to the young girl.
"Why don't you go home for the day, we aren't terribly busy. Just take
the day off to relax and rest."

The blonde very calmly states, "No, I'd be better off here. I need to
keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here."

The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual. "If you need
anything, just let me know."

Well, a few hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde. He
looks out over his office and sees the blonde hysterically crying!! He
rushes out to her, asking, "What's so bad now. Are you gonna be ok?"

"No!" exclaims the blonde. "I just got a call from my sister. She told
me that HER mom died too!!"

A koala is sitting up a gum tree ... Smoking a joint
When a little lizard walks past and looks up and says,
"Hey Koala ! What are you doing?"

The koala says: "Smoking a joint, come up and have some."
So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the koala and they
have a few joints. After a while the little lizard says his mouth is
'dry' and is going to get a drink from the river. But the little
lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the
river.
A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little lizard and helps
him to the side, then asks the little lizard: "What's the matter with
you?"
The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting smoking
a joint with the koala in the tree, got too stoned and then fell into
the river while taking a drink.
The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks into the rain
forest, finds the tree where the koala is sitting finishing a joint,
and he looks up and says "Hey you!"
So the koala looks down at him and says:

"Shiiiiiiiiiiit dude ... How much water did you drink

A blonde's car gets a flat tire on the Interstate one day So she

the car and opens the trunk. Takes out two cardboard men, unfolds them
and stands them at the rear of the vehicle facing oncoming traffic.

The lifelike cardboard men are in trench coats exposing their nude

bodies to approaching drivers.

Not surprisingly, the traffic became snarled and backed up. It wasn't
very long before a police car arrives. The Officer, clearly enraged,
approaches the blonde of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What is going on
here?"

"My car broke down, Officer" says the woman, calmly.

"Well, what the hell are these obscene cardboard pictures doing here by
the road?!" asks the Officer.

"Helllllooooo, those are my emergency flashers!" she replied.

hmmmm I always too independant to be a good thing, I'd rather not have
to deal with someone who "NEEDS" me but someone who "wants" me!!

2 special ladies watchin each others back, good job TX

Denise, you and yours are in my prayers and the huge group of online
friends I've gathered over the years now too. There's a mighty loud
noise goin up for ya hon and trust me, I've seen miracles happen too
many times to think that it won't be anything but another miracle here.
Hope you get feeling better and don't stress too much, you're loved and
bein watched over!

What's scarey is there are people out there who'd reply and actually
start a dialog with them! Believe it or not someone will probably fall
for it

nawwwww, felt so bad about her story AND her language skills I just
wired her every penny I had to help her out............ NOT !!

it here. It's so bad it's funny LOL

Subject:
hello
Sending date:
14.04.2007 23:08
From: wittlemon
invite as friend
Block user




I am rachel smith I love you Profile and I never
believed anybody wanna be with a girl like mine who's
got a fairy tale about life's experience o.k. If U
really want to meet me for real, i want U to know the
problem i have and what my hard experiences about life
was ok!! Please read this carefully and U'll
understand
the kind of person i am and what my hard experiences
about life is o.k. I was born in georgia and raise in
georgia, USA, and my
parents were from United Kingdom. I started my fairly
tale when I was just 18 months old, i lost my Mum. I
didn't growup to know who she was or who ever my
mother
was o.k. My father had to raise me all alone. I was
the
only child of the family. I also lost my Dad few years
ago, It was, when i was a kid and i lost my mum that
my
dad had to build a House in Ohio ok. that was where i
grew up and spend most of my life time so far.
I met a guy after my father's death few months ago
when
i moved out to macon, because my father raised me
never
to have friends cos he had bad experience with friends
when he was much more younger , and he made me stay
indoor all day too. This guy i met was a german
alright? He lived with me in macon, for over 2months ,
he asked if i would come over to africa to see his
Uncle so we can get engaged and i can be happy after
all the sorrows i've had I agree to go on the trip
to africa with him. I saved enough to keep us
confortable while we were away o.k. I had to withdraw
about $10,500 i have in my account to make sure we
were
safe and secure while we were on this trip . So i
closed up my account. But unfortunately, when we got
to
africa he took me to stay in a hotel, and after few
weeks and days when we got here, he brought a bottle
of
champaigne and i think he wanted to propose marriage
to
me, but after i drank the champaigne i was asleep all
through and when i
woke up, i noticed that he had gone with all my stuff
my money, my jewelries, and everything i had left out
here ok. he only left me with some cloths and nothing
else, I was all alone here, and he left me a note
saying that he had gone over to the Ukraine, with
another girl, the lady he really loved and he's been
keeping for so long when he was once in africa . Right
now i'm in a hell oftrouble. I was left out here all
alone with some billsto take care of at the hotel i'm
staying and the hotel management won't let me get out
of here if i didn't pay the bills ok!! It's really
crazy. I feel like killing myself ok. At the moment i
have an outstanding bill of $350 here on my
accomodation and just $100 for the internet services,
provided for me out here o.k. the hotel manager
out here seized my passport andreturn flight ticket so
that i will not run away. Please i need your help to
get my life back on track and start up a new life for
a
life time happiness I promise if U can get me out of
here by helping mepay the bills to the Hotel
management, i will surely make it upto U o.k. and
hopefully i will accept that i have found a new life
with U So it's up to U to decide on what U wanna do
with me
concerning these issues Waiting to read from U soon .i
am also looking for someone that can be the flesh of
my
flesh and the bone of my bone , one that will not just
be beside me but one that can be part of me pls o tell
me more about yourself maybe we can get along fine and
you can email me to rachel_smith150@yahoo.com
rachel smith

this might be out of line but why not paste some of those outrageous
emails on the board WITH the senders profile? That way the A-holes will
be exposed as what they are and others can be forewarned not to mention
it might just make them think twice before being so assinine in the 1st
place knowing they'd be shown for what they are? Ya'll should be able to
copy and paste the chat transcript the same way and that'd show how he
came at you out of the blue with a suggestion like that.

on the web and in real life unfortunately
just report the SOB amd remember we're not all like that

OH MAN ! ! They just said on the news they're already cancelling flights
at DIA ! This could get bumpy !

Doin well IAm, got "promoted" at work (meaning a new sched and
responsibilities WITHOUT an increase in pay but loving the new sched
because it means I can pull some OT and the change in job structure
means I'm busier but it just seems to fit me better and enjoying the job
a bit more. Might not have gotten a pay increase with it but the way the
bosses have been acting since I took it on I'm thinkin raise time will
be generous
How's life been treatin you?

This'll be datin myself but who else remembers the "green stamps" ? I
remember Mom collecting them and having to help lick the danged things
to fill the books you saved them in to redeem them. YUCK!

That'd be about the only time a woman would complain about getting 6 to
12 inches wouldn't it ellgee ? ROTF
I grew up in NE Ohio in the lake effect belt of Lake Erie. I did some
research before moving here and Greeley averages just 18 inches of snow
a year! No wonder they're flustered by the several feet they've gotten
this year, and to compound the problem it's been colder than normal so
the snow stayed around for weeks instead of disapearing within a couple
of days. I keep telling them the area I grew up in averages 15-20 FEET
of snow a year over the course of a winter and we call 6 inches just a
heavy frost! LOL
It hasn't helped matters any that they've seen I can drive around in
just about the worst of it and yet live less than 100 yards from the
office ROTFLMAO

MTN ...they're blaming me mainly because I accidently predicted it clear
back last April LOL But then again it seems everyone is welcoming the
water it means they'll have this year. The whole area has been under a
sever drought for several years.
Dunno Tulip, there's quite a few fugly bald guys in the world ya know
LOL