Community > Posts By > chronicliar75
Topic:
Lyrics and Songs
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I am really into Coldplay & Silverchair Music these days,
but I wanted to share what others might think as a song of love (love song) for them, but has always been a "song about life" in my perspective, everytime I listen to it. "Ever Since The World Began" I'll never know what brought me here, As if somebody led my hand, It seems I hardly had to steer, My course was planned. And destiny it guides us all, And by it's hand we rise and fall, But only for a moment, Time enough to catch our breath again. And we're just another piece of the puzzle, Just another part of the plan, How one live touches the other, Is so hard to understand. Still we walk this road together, We travel through as far as we can, And we have waited for this moment in time, Ever since the world began. Taking in the times gone by, We wonder how it all began, We'll never know and still we Try to understand. And even though the seasons change, The reasons shall remain the same, It's love that keeps us holding on Till we can see the sun again. |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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I have made good and bad choices in life, I have also learned from these.(most of the time) I am divorced, yet that does not make my decision to get married.. Wrong, it means we Did not blend as well as we had once thought.... I believe I am a good mother, I have 4 adult children, and 3 grandbabies.. I use to ask myself, why, how come,,,and how the hell do I change this... I have learned, that the only person who can make me happy, is me.. From There I am able to move forward, and live life to the fullest.. Knowing that is all I do, I have done my best. I have disappointed my mother a many of times growing up, she has been gone from this Life for 30 years now...I hope she is looking upon me, and smiling at the woman I have become.. I grow daily, faltere and start again... Life is amazing, when we stop analyzing everything we do, or don't do. Namaste (sigh) I love your reply post very much Ma'am I prefer to savor it, dwell on it and smile about it, instead of commenting on it. Thank u very much |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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Alabe.com provides pretty good readings. I checked it Sir. Astrology software, it says. I am not interested in reading it, I dont have the time too. Thank u for the suggestion though. |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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well, if nothing else, it shows you what you don't want within your life.. Just because a parent is not the best, doesn't mean you will be the same.. Know yourself and what you want and can live with and carry on from there..Where you come from doesn't indicate where you are going.. Thank u Ma'am Yes, I am particular with what I do not want in my life. I will not really mind if I will be not the best mother or best wife, just as long as I will not fail my future child or future husband, I think Im already good with it. I always like just being average Your last 2 lines are so full of wisdom Ma'am, I like it very much. Thank u. |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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Throw the self help books out! People are in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Sometimes it is to learn 'how not to be'. Sometimes it is to learn 'to walk away' Just ask yourself what you deserve & what you will & will not tolerate. And just live without over analyzing. I am a bit sentimental with regards to my books, I canot throw them out "People are in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime" - I agree word for word on this^^^ "Sometimes it is to learn 'how not to be'" - I learn not to be comfortable with alcohol. Only 1 bottle of beer after river trekking or if I have lasagna or pizza for dinner, if I run out of red wine. - I learn not to be mindful if I took a different path than others. I admit it is not the fastest way, nor the easiest way,nor the most effective way, but it is the path I choose that I am sure, I will not lose myself in the process & give in to other people's demand of how I should live my life. I want to do it my own way SassyEuro2. I wanted to get an honest opinion of others, who are already ahead of me in experience, regarding marriage & parenting. Did their past make a more direct impact to them or their childhood experience. I pride myself, that I am one of those people that can filter out honest opinions from mischief & ridicule. or from some preposterous off mark suggestions to ridiculous insignificant/inconsequential garbages that I cant understand & could not apply or relate in my life. I really can filter out SassyEuro2, not dead on but after thinking it over and staying away from politics. Too misleading & confusing to follow in there. Being in mingle forum actually gives me enough input than reading books for so many years. Interacting with them, makes me learn things I only wonder on books. "Sometimes it is to learn 'to walk away' " -I am good at walking away without looking back SassyEuro2. 10 years or 15 years is too short a time to communicate again, if I choose to walk away from people I love. "Just ask yourself what you deserve & what you will & will not tolerate. And just live without over analyzing. " - I love this very much ^^^ I really can learn from this. I am still working hard to achieve this^^^ Thank u. |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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Unfortunately there are no deciding factors. I have 4 brothers and 1 sister. We all grew up in the same environment. My mother was physically abusive and my dad certainly had no parenting skills, yet each of us have grown up differently. I am a proud father of 3. I will brag a little and sy I'm a very good father and I've never laid violence upon my children. My marriage failure was to do my ex, not me. My brothers have grown into personalities of their own. One is very short tempered and drinks too much. He's also a complete *** hole to his wife. One is lazy as hell, he treats his wife and kids affectionately but he refuses to work or parent. The situations we're in affect us only if we let them. As for marriage and parenting goes one is unpredictable the other is a personal comfort zone. You may be with someone for years before you realize it's just not working out. It may be you, it may be them, it may even be mutual failure. The parenting part is just something you have to feel. If you think you can handle it or not AND if you trust your partner to as well. All the books in the world are no match for the randomness of being human. I think the Rubik's cube does a better job of explaining it. You are who you are regardless of the situation at any point in time. Thank u for the input. I appreciate that u approach my OP as a man instead of a male psychologist:) Goes to say that what u are implying is, it would still depend on me & the person I will choose to become my partner. But I have always wondered the probability:) Anyway, books are good. It gives u an explanation why others behaves as such. Sometimes, a woman just wonders if she will be fit to be a good wife or a nurturing mother. Or will I be better off as being single. I like rubiks cube too. But there are just things that are too important, to just base on logic & intelligence. There are just important things, that mind, heart & soul should in be in one first before a person will make life changing decision |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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Are you a bad person ? Do you know the difference between right and wrong ?Have you been exposed to happy loving wifes and mothers in your wider family I believe if you answer no and yes then you have the tools to be successful at both .You seem very mindful of your past experiences and obviously display the intelligence to not let your past negative experiences affect your future go forth and be happy Am I a bad person? Im average. I have bad attributes. But I also have good ones. In my opinion I am a bad daughter though. It took me many years to contact my parents again. Every adult knows what is right & wrong, but mostly it is the application that I am concern about. Whether we admit it or not, our past is what made us who we are now.But it is also not something to be ashamed of. U peg me right on that, I am mindful of what makes me who I am now, but it still remains to be seen if I would indeed let my past affect me being a woman that I am now. Or how it will affect me, if I will become a wife or a mother someday:) |
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Topic:
Remembering school days
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Everybody has been excellent or highly good in certain subjects or courses by "nature" , by passion or by inteligence and talent. Sciences? Maths? Literature? Arts? languages? Sports? other? Which one? Looking back, I never excelled in anything:) I love Math, but Math does not love me. (ever since I can remember my lowest grade was always Math ) Always the average, no bad grades but never been on the top of the class. Im a big fan of sports in school but always as a spectator. I do not like competing. To maintain my scholarship, I am required most of the weekends on Out Reach Programs, so I get to travel most of the time to some indigenous tribes & teach children Alphabets & Basic Addition & Subtraction. It was in my college years that I learn to love tennis, loves to jog, & get fascinated so much with river trekking & mountain climbing. I do not know how to draw & paint but I have always love Art, Anything about Art fascinated me. Im a huge fan, that is what makes me interested & in love with History, Ruins & Museums. I did not finish College:) |
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Topic:
Direct Impact or Effect
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I am really curious about this.
I have an almost next to nil experience on relationships and I am kind of curious Minglers, what will have a more direct impact or effect, if ever I will get married & be a parent. My childhood experience or my traumatic experience after I left home? I have read a lot of books but somehow they did not make any sense or impact to me on this. Say my childhood is average experience. Pampered because I have 2 protective brothers and doting parents. Their only cardinal rule is no riding of bicycles. Protect the legs hahahahaha. Another thing though, my father might be 1 of the best father in my corner of the world but he will not be in the best husband top 1000. My father has issues with whiskey. He fights with my mother in front of the 3 of us, if he is drunk, but is sweet & apologetic when he is sober which is 80% of the time. Will that have an effect on me when I get married? As an adult I can now accept the smell of whiskey without misgivings? What will be the probability that it will affect my being a mother or a wife,if I will decide to marry & have a kid? Then about being the youngest and only daughter, pinching is the strongest disciplinary action I get. The downside is, if u get all the attention, u crave for freedom. U crave to be taken seriously. No matter how serious my question is about life, or about our family or about the government, my brothers have the tendency to just find it so hilarious. 98% of the time,they just laugh so hard but never answer my questions, of course my parents think I just read too much. In my arrogance & my need of freedom I walk away from home. Without the protection of my parents, brothers & bestfriends, I did not know life is really quiet hard. Then that traumatic experience happened. After that, I never wanted to go home. I did not even contact them for so many years. I feel that I will just be a burden to them. But I was already adult at that time? Will it have more impact on me when I get married? will my traumatic experience makes me probably a bad wife or bad mother? if I will choose to get married? I want to know the probability if with the combination of an undisciplined-pampered childhood and a traumatic experience in your 20's will actually make u a bad wife or a bad mother? What do u think is the probability Minglers? Does anyone here in Mingle has the same experience and still get married? Did it affect your marriage? Is there a possibility that it will be a doomed marriage, from the start,even if u will choose your partner carefully? |
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Can anyone live a bachelor life? I dont know with other people but for me - Yes, of course u can. I m 30 years still singleton gf, no girlfriend yet,no marriage. Till now . Lived happily. But now slowly I dont know but I m loosing my happiness.is it due lack of sex.Is sex is a need or a just a game for enjoyment. Plz tell Ur opinion frankly. I do not think it has something to do with your being bachelor or the lack of sex hahahaha. Why? Because of your question - "Is sex a need or just a game for enjoyment?" You are suspecting that u are starting to be unhappy just because of sex or lack of sex? Think. |
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What I learnt from my last relationship, basically all the things I didn't really learn from previous ones. I suppose that's why this relationship had such an impact on me. I didn't pick up on the lessons earlier in life, I don't think I was ready for them, so in the end it was rammed down my throat. (Abusive relationship) It helped me find my inner strength ... It made me realize how much personal freedom I need ... A shock, I seriously never knew!! It helped my artistic side blossom ... It got me closer to what I really want to do with my life ... It also taught me the 'art' of forgiving ... All things I didn't know I had, needed or wanted. It got me so much closer to who I really am! And for that I am truly grateful. I like this very much Ms. Crystal^^^ My ex was and is still the best that ever happened in my life, but my ex was and is still is my biggest failure:) It taught me that no matter how hard you try & give your best, if in the end, it will hurt the one u love most, then I have to walk away. |
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Topic:
Love
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Love me for who I am not for wat u want me to be Makes me think of one the Carpenters' song If the person u like or love believes that being who u are right now is not enough. Chances are, no matter what u will do, u will never be enough for that person:) Be proud of who u are. Be proud of what u are. Dont be what that person, want u to be, just because u want that person to love u. Do not lose yourself for the sake of love. If its the real thing, it normally brings out the best in u, it will complement u. It will complete u. I know it sounds idealistic. But if u will take time to think about it, it is the most basic. |
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Topic:
Lyrics and Songs
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Sunscreen - Baz Luhrman Ladies and Gentleman, Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience... I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh never mind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked... You're not as fat as you Imagine. Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind. The kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing everyday that scares you. Sing. Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. Floss. Don't waste your time on jealousy; Sometimes you're ahead, Sometimes You're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; If you Succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements. Stretch. Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your Life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone. Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't Congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, Use it every way you can... Don't be afraid of it, or what other people Think of it, It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own... Dance... even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings; They are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young. Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will Philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, Maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out. Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth. But trust me on the sunscreen.. |
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Topic:
My thoughts on marriage
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But the shift in our society of 'do it yourself, you don't need a man, don't let anyone ever change you, and you deserve the best of the best, and the instant-gratification that many expect' has in my mind made marriage not only extremely difficult, but also not all that useful... in a society that focuses solely on 'look out for yourself" the idea of "becoming one, and perhaps doing something for someone else...even if you don't get anything(tangible) in return' is contradictory to everything this generation has been taught....it's no wonder marriage rates are on the decline, and divorce rates on the rise.... Compatibility Isaac is important to others. Not the best of the best but someone who u would be sure u can live with for the rest of your life. Others take time in choosing because they do not want trial & errors. Others take time in choosing actually because marriage is sacred for them and they want what their parents have. They wanted their own family raised the way they were raised. Because there are still people who do not want to make babies outside marriage. Because there are still people who wish that if ever they have children they should be raised in a traditional way, than what it is now in the modern world. To each of his/ her own I guess on this. |
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Topic:
My thoughts on marriage
Edited by
chronicliar75
on
Mon 11/30/15 11:50 PM
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I don't think marriage is the worst thing that can happen to someone...but I also don't believe it is as necessary...or even as relevant as it used to be. Most homes now have two people working, independent of each other, with their own sense of self-worth and independence. They are proud in themselves, of what they've accomplished, and they want companionship...not that they need it..just want..you can get that without marriage(although still not as socially acceptable) I think marriage was necessary in single-income households it gave the wife equal(and legal) rights to her husband's(assuming he was the bread winner) finances which was necessary to raise a family. It's' not just the situation that's changed but the attitudes as well...women used to wear their man's name with pride.....(some still may...but fewer than before) watch any older TV show and you'll see a woman beaming with pride saying something like "I'm misses DR. Robert Jones!"...they were proud to be a wife, proud of their man. Ariel u may want to ponder on this more^^^ if I may dare say, give it more a thought- it may change an angle in your perspective. Sounds like you should do some serious healing from childhood trauma/wounds or you'll miss out on a lot of good in your life. You let other people's choices influence your own chances to happiness. As it is, you're likely going to project your own fears on the guy that loves you, make him responsible for your parents' choices and mistakes, If I may suggest, u might want to read this advice from Ms. Crystal twice or thrice Ariel & internalize it. Because your OP did indeed sound like- because of your parents choices & mistakes, u have that kind of perspective. Remember, those are your parents choices Ariel.They have their own lives to live, u have yours. Would u really prefer they stayed together miserable with each other, than having separate lives & be happy with someone else? I may not go as far as calling it a trauma when parents get divorce but it may be the main factor why you have such opinion of marriage at such a young age. at the same time you expect him to heal you? How fair is that? You push him away, yet expect him to convince you that he's for real and what you have is real? I call that a path of self-sabotaging and hurting other people in the process. No one but you can heal you and the hurt in you. You cannot make someone else responsible for your happiness. Not if you want a lasting, happy relationship, cos you'd suck the life out of them. Another thing is, that with your convictions, you are likely to attract someone who will confirm those beliefs .. In fairness to the 19 year old girl Ms. Crystal I think she is just terrified of loving someone because her parent's marriage did not work out. She even go as far as saying that she wants to actually meet someone who can make her happy. Which even me as an adult can relate. She is just 19 years old, she is not pushing someone away.She just have a bad concept of marriage. I beg to disagree Ma'am, with all due respect: "that it is a path of self-sabotaging & hurting another people in the process." She is not even allowing someone to be in her life yet, though she wanted to. I feel her, I actually can understand where she is coming from. I am an adult, but I am skeptical & scared of marriage even if my own parents never get separated. Ariel just thought that marriage is the worst thing that can happen to someone. Her reasons are valid. To say that she is hurting & needed healing is I guess a bit too much. Why would she suck out the life of someone just because she is cautious & wary about marriage? I have witness few couples that are happy, productive & going stronger without the benefit of marriage in their relationship. Another thing is, that with your convictions, you are likely to attract someone who will confirm those beliefs .. With all due respect for this^^^ I will still beg to disagree. I say let Ariel take her time. She is young, her convictions are not but impressionable. There is nothing wrong with being cautious, skeptical & preserving oneself. Especially about as sacred as marriage. Life anyway has always a way of teaching us, what is worth it and what is not. |
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Topic:
Lyrics and Songs
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Dust In The Wind I close my eyes, only for a moment, and the moment's gone All my dreams pass before my eyes, a curiosity Dust in the wind All they are is dust in the wind Same old song, just a drop of water in an endless sea All we do crumbles to the ground though we refuse to see Dust in the wind All we are is dust in the wind Now, don't hang on, nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky It slips away And all your money won't another minute buy Dust in the wind All we are is dust in the wind All we are is dust in the wind Dust in the wind Everything is dust in the wind Everything is dust in the wind The wind |
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5:24 PM
Monday November 30, 2015 Pasig, Philippines |
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Topic:
My thoughts on marriage
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Am I the only person who thinks marriage is the worst thing that can happen to you? From observing people & learning from them, there a lot of people like u who finds marriage the worst thing that can happen to them. Mostly I know though are males. If I may dare say, u are still 19 years old Ariel, marriage might not be for everybody, but there is also the possibility, that it could also be the best thing that can happen to u. My parents married at a young age and until now, even though all of us, their 3 children have already left home & have our own respective lives, they are still together. They have pets, they have each other.They wither the odds. If I may dare say, take your time. Learn from life,learn from other people. It might change your perspective of things. I am terrified of losing my name, my independence, and my control of myself. If you think of it, the day you say I do it goes from I to us, I like to we like ,And with the generation I'm apart of we would rather drop a marriage than fight to make it work. I am aware that I come from a divorced home so I already have trouble believing in a love that lasts, but I don't write all of this to rant. U are 19 years old. Not a time to be terrified. Time to take on the world. If there is a time to make mistakes, it is when u are young hahahahaha. Just know when to draw the line. Learn to preserve yourself. What will always define u are the decisions u have made for yourself. Know what is important to u. Know what is worth fighting for or not? Dont take my word for this, find out for yourself, but there is love that lasts till death. I've seen & witness it from other couples. I have never been married & I too am skeptical & scared of marriage but it is sacred Ariel. It will take all of u to choose the right for u to make it work. Others find their suitable partner for them the first time around, others after a few tries. It will always depend on u and to the man u want to spend the rest of your life with. I write it because I got to thinking and how great would it be to meet someone who made me get over my fear of love because the fear of being without them is worse. Someone who makes me happy to loose my independence or rather be most my self when I'm with them. What is to fear of love? Maybe u mean the consequences of loving someone? Educate yourself more. Read more. Learn from others mistakes. Never mind how old u are before u will be ready to say, "u are prepared to tackle love," because even if u are not ready Ariel, sometimes life has a way of throwing u a curve ball. And the only thing u can do is do your best & handle it the best way that u can without destroying yourself & the one u are in love with. At the end of the day, it is what makes u at peace, happy & positive about life that counts. With or without a partner, your choice. |
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Topic:
Respect for our Military
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This is another open letter
from a person whose country enjoys Mutual Defense Treaty (USA-Philippines) since August, 1951. With the Enhanced Defense Cooperation Agreement (EDCA)last April, 2014 in mind, I from my country would humbly like to give my appreciation & full support of the US Military. We not only like the fact that u are nearby, but it is your military superiority that gives a level of assurance & security, in International Military Affairs. Your state of the art technology & medicine never failed us during emergencies & natural disasters. We more than respect, appreciate & admire your Military superiority, most of all we value the sacrifices u have made in the name of Freedom & Democracy. |
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7:41 PM Sunday November 29, 2015 Pasig, Philippines |
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