what is there to be afraid of? it's not like you have to cut off your finger and fedex it to your grandma if you get turned down.

my stab-wound scars are pretty nice. one on the bicep, one in the leg. i don't even know how many scars i have total. sports, fights, working on my vehicles...they all leave their marks.

i had a piece of pencil lead in my thigh for about 15 years from my sister stabbing me with a pencil accidentally (she was running with it in the hall. but hey, at least she got me instead of tripping and putting her eye out.

i haven't had all that many surgeries but i choose local anesthetic (which should be an option for you) whenever possible for a few good reasons. first, i think it's pretty interesting to see what i look like on the inside. second, waking up from general anesthesia sucks, especially in the middle of the surgery. i did that once, couldn't tell them and really didn't enjoy it

bare-knuckle boxing

bear ill will

bear stearns

most of my hoa rules are pretty much just repeats of city code. the difference is that the hoa acts much faster to enforce them. plus, we have a nice pool

what a coincidence. those just happen to be the same sounds for transformers, slightly remixed. ha.

been to primetime? what's that?

at dinner, i saw a kid a few tables over playing with a transformers toy (old-school optimus prime). he was making the transforming sound over and over until he finished. i couldn't help but bust out laughing because i remember doing the exact same thing. some of them, like metroplex and omega supreme, would require making the sound for a few minutes straight. but we couldn't just play a tape of it or stop altogether...that would be cheating.

i like having an hoa. i didn't think i would but mine works exactly how it should. there are no unmowed or weed-filled lawns or ridiculous yard art here. nobody paints their house a weird color to "make a statement". nobody has a crappy-looking garage-to-room conversion. and they patrol for criminals even though it's a good area.

they pretty much stay out of the way until someone does something stupid. i could probably get away with a clothesline as long as it wasn't visible from the street...not that i have that urge.

sin
head like a hole
wish
dead souls

mean street

Iron Butterfly - In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida


next up...
Blue Oyster Cult - Godzilla
Guns N Roses - Rocket Queen
The Prodigy - Invaders Must Die

no

i wonder if it would have worked out if she'd chosen a different name. for instance, "mountaingoatgirl" or "sewerwatergirl". my guess is no. "mountainwaterballoon" probably would have been ok, just confusing.

it's good for parents to put the kid first. yeah it's inconvenient sometimes but responsibilities usually are. watch the news for 5 minutes and see what the lack of parental attention and supervision leads to.

it's like any other fun activity. it's more fun with someone you enjoy being with otherwise. i love vegas but i'm not going there with someone i don't like to be around.

you were in a very disturbing episode of sesame street and it caused some of the cast severe emotional trauma. it's why elmo refers to himself in the 3rd person and developed a masochistic need to be tickled so relentlessy that it hurts. the letter x is now banned from the show.

tonight in the octagon, it's the leader of the lollipop crew vs the oompa loompa in charge of the gobstopper room.

my money's on the oompa loompa. his song is much better.

exactly.

i profited from the monkey bars. people always dropped change out of their pockets when they hung upside down and it got covered in sand or gravel (we had multiple playgrounds) so, for the last 5 minutes or so of recess my friend and i dug out as much as we could. we'd walk away with $5 apiece some days, which was a fortune to a kid in the 80s. he spent his on pink panther popsicles from the icecream man. i saved mine. i still have a 50 cent piece i found there.

she's after leprechaun gold but it's not as easy to find as it used to be.