Why do you expect sex with a woman so easily!?

so you think you are doing them a huge favor when in fact it's actually a small inconvenience.

Nothing in this world is free. Why should any part of a human be 'free'? WE should all have some value on ourselves.

Whoever is the one pursuing should be willing to give something in return to get it, be it time, respect, or whatever.

For what it's worth--according to her ex-fiance, Mariah Carey presented a marriage contract, wanting so much each year they would be married...sort of like being paid to be married.

Hmm.. I suppose you have a point..

Always go into a date with the intention of showing your date the most fun-filled, safe, non-demanding, bestest time they ever had with a “new” interest and EXPECT NOTHING in return.

Your rewards will follow as they now know YOU as the one who makes them feel special and is worthy of their time/energy/love.

If you want an LTR, never stop doing the above so as to reinforce in their minds that you are the best.

In between dates; focus on making YOURSELF the best person you will ever know.

Your rewards will follow as everyone wants to hang with the “boss”.

that you treat each other with respect is a matter of course for me. I also understand that women want to be conquered. no problem. what i mean is that women almost always try to ask for something. be it emotional, with promises or something, or just material. when a woman asks the man about it and he likes it more directly into the box.

Maybe you've been with the wrong sort of women for you. Perhaps the women you've been with are using sex to manipulate.

You put people off here when you said "most women" since that's a silly and incorrect generalization. I've never been with a woman like that and I've been with my fair share.

Make better choices and stop blaming "most women" for feeling like your being manipulated.

Some men really do have small brains ... no surprises women are the smarter sex !!!!

Not small. Just filled up with ideas from the other head.

Smart, until it comes to your car breaking down, washing machines and other household appliances fixed, or building jobs done, then 9 times out of ten, you phone a guy to sort it?

perhaps that is tactical

lol ... two heads are definitely not better than one

With the question worded like this...why as a man wouldn't you owe them something to have sex with them?

Other than that it's a bad question.

Partly for this reason:

Is that your perspective on what you think they're doing?
Or are they handing out a contract clearly stipulating that there is something "owed" delineating what that is (emotional, tangible)?

What is the "real" question here:

1. Why am I interpreting a woman's behavior, words, communication, as their asking me for something specifically in return for sex (rather than for something else, sex is just the part I am most focused on so am association sex with it)?
1a. Why am I interpreting a desire for communication and feedback as a cost?

2. Why do I feel guilt, pressure, stress, a need to give a woman something in return for having sex with me?

3. Why is it the (only?) women I am having sex with directly and immediately ask me for something in return for having sex with them?


You don't provide any useful information, limiting or defining conditions for your question.

I mean there's a huge difference between:
- "all the prostitutes I pick up tell me I'm hot and sexy, but they still demand money when we're done."
and
- "why is it when I lie to women and tell them I want a relationship on the internet, we meet up, end up having sex, they call me wanting me to take them out again even though I'm not feeling it so ghosted them?"
and
- "why is it with every FWB I've had that after a couple of months of constant sex they start asking me how I feel or wanting more than just FWB or refuse to go halfsies on the hotel room?"
and
- "why is it with every woman I choose to date, I show off my wealth, talk about taking care of them, we have sex and I try to disappear, they come back asking me to help them with rent?"
and so many more.

For all I know you date the same type of woman.

For all I know you only go after women "out of your league", or of a certain personality type, and none of them will ever see you as anything other than a means to a quick fix for what they want.


Is your "real" question something more like "why can't women just STFU, enjoy sex, subjugate themselves to what I want, communicate how I want them to communicate (in ways I understand), compartmentalize sex, just take that which I want to give them and only that, value things the same way I value them (sex is pleasure. I get pleasure, they get pleasure, so to me it's even exchange), and enjoy the moment without any thought or emotional continuance outside of it?"

Or more succinctly "What can't I just get what I want when I want it how I want it without any more risk, cost, or consequence than I want, and they accept, grant, and guarantee that?"


A lot of people say this. They play lip service. IMO at least.
IME a lot of people that say this actually mean "I conflate avoiding conflict, or escalating conflict, hiding behind a social facade for convenience, as respect."

IMO if the preceding quoted portion were true, this thread would probably not exist, as the women that contributed to the question being raised would have been asked directly.


Your question isn't really clear. What's the "real" question?
And what exactly are your experiences which shaped it?

Perhaps it's just more convenient to phone us guys than risk breaking a nail? I actually had someone tell me that before, as I was erecting a new fence for her Blondey!

I liken it to when some men rely on their mum to still do their washing When they leave home ... they could do it themselves but when someone else is willing ... motivation disappears . Nail maintenance is not only expensive but makes It difficult to grip anything

When I came back to Scotland after working in London for years, I had to get my wee mum to do my washing after my washing machine blew up. I paid her for it though, until I could get a new one, as I'd ploughed all my money into decorating and furnishing my flat at the time!

Where are the women who want to be friends simply to help us practice the wheel pose until we get really really Good at it?

Oh gawwww, I so dislike that whole women are smarter than men stuff. How about women and men are just more adept in various areas, does it always end up having to be smarter then?

As to the owing something for sex? The smart aleck answer that came to mind when I read the original post was... "Well honey, darling, buttercup, stop going to Prostitutes to get your sex. Of course they want to get paid. That's how they pay their bills."

As your average everyday woman so, or maybe just as myself. You owe me nothing, but neither do I owe you anything that includes letting you rut around inside my body. Now there is owing and then there is requiring a certain level of respect before you even stand a chance with me. You don't want emotional connections with a woman? Fair, then find one who is as cold about it as you are or go pay for it. You don't want her to at least like to go out to dinner that you might actually have to pay for? Fine, then make that clear to begin with and that weeds those who want that out. You don't want them to want to talk to you ever again after your get your jollies? Perfect, then you go and tell those women flat out... Here is the deal. I am horny, I want to **** you, then I'll pull out get up and leave. You cool with that? If she agrees, fine. If she blocks you or tells you to go "have a nice day". Well that is her choice. See, there are some who will be okay with with that, but most are not.

Simply for one single reason. We'd like to be treated with at least some respect, and not seen as a blowup doll. Hope that helps.