Does it really matter, who says"I love you' First ?

This thread is for ROMANTIC. Love.


I know a woman, who told her man first time, it took him a couple of months later to say it.

Now they married for 8 years.


:

Who says it first doesn't matter... what matters is meaning it when you say it

It took Han more than a couple of months to say it back to Leia.

Some people would be upset if the other person didn’t say it back right away. You’re friend handled it well.

I don’t think it matters who says it first but more when you say it. If you say it too soon, you could scare the other person away.

Can be real awkward...
I'm not likely going to be the first one to say it. Been there, done that, man not ready yet, still in the stage of thinking "Am I willing to give up my single-hood?"
If you then say "I love you" ... disaster.

I do not believe it's romantic to expect a response when you say it. Anytime I've said it was simply because I meant it. Did I hope for a similar response? Of course. However, it was not said to hear something in return. Our feelings are our own whether or not the feeling is reciprocated.

Well said. It's among the most difficult saying to use for all humans.

In fact, I suspect that a GREAT deal of human literature and vocabulary was the direct or indirect result of people trying to AVOID saying those exact words, but still express positive emotional or intellectual interest in someone else.

Context ..intention and sincerity are important when it comes to saying I love you in the romantic sense . Fathers should teach their sons not to say I love you to an intimate partner before sex .. during sex or after sex .. unless of course they are in an established loving relationship and the expression of love is genuine.

I don't mind telling a man, I love you, if I really do. It doesn't matter, if he said it First or not.

I don't Fall in Love easily. However, I have had several dates through the years. Some were very Romantic.

Some people. Use the word "Love" without thinking about it much. That's because they really don't know , what it truly is. IMO

I think, next time I say it first,
I'm gonna wait for the most inopportune,
inconvenient, time and place, to say it.

Just so I can see the woman's face light up,
with the 'deer in the headlights' look.

That is a *lovely* story to hear.

But sadly, there is a certain "breed" of person on dating sites who use the "L-word" as a weapon to try and persuade you to give them money, cards etc.
Please beware of such people, and do not give in to them.

Yeah... The before thing can be especially bad...


Paradise By The Dashboard Light

Yes, if it really matters to at least one of the people in the relationship.


That doesn't really mean anything.

For all I know she felt him withdrawing and said it to emotionally shock him into more clearly communicating what was going on, to not withdraw.

And for all I know those 2 months he was trying to get back with his ex, but she moved out of state, and he got tired of his now g/f wheedling and nagging him to tell her he loves her, and maybe she had no idea the indirect communication she was nonverbally shouting, so he said it just to say it because his better option went away and he wanted his now g/f to shut up.

Then for all I know they both started withdrawing from each other, but didn't want another failed relationship, so got married. Kind of like how some people have kids to try and save a relationship, maybe the woman and man you know got married to save/perpetuate the relationship.

For all I know maybe these last 8 years have been miserable but no one wants to be the first one to say "I want a divorce."

personally I would wait ... to be in the relationship a while ...

I do know it is good to tell a romantic partner you love them...
if that is how you feel in hope they will come back and say to you ...


sometimes in long relationships it is good to thank that person...
and tell them you love them if u feels that ... people like to be reminded you are loved ... or you get into a slump ... and thats when the feelings start to clam up ... I think you should tell them at least once a day ... if you love them ...

No ! That's not why he didn't say "I love you". First. :

She says their marriage is good.

Hi

That's true

I get "I Love You" within the first week but this time it was on the same day.
I still haven't said it back and she has no problem waiting because we ACTUALLY TALK to each other.
I'll say it if and when I feel it and not before.

Love exists in churches, gangs, families, and small towns. I have never experienced romantic love. I would rather just be invisible when I am anywhere near women interested in dating.

Personally, my thoughts are to say it when you feel it's true. I'm not one to hold back just because I feel like it will give the other person power, if all they want is control/power, the relationship will never work anyways, lol.