How do you handle a partner who blows up at the slightest provocation? I've decided to give myself some space so as to save my life. ..whatdoyouthink

Don't provoke it and suggest they seek anger management coping skills to find their triggers and learn how to control their emotions.

Good advice SeaColony! Add to this a bullet proof vest, a neck protector and a tin cup for the boys!

THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT OTHERS......SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE WITH A SLUSH

FUND OF ANGER....IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU...THE PERSON IS STUCK IN THE

PAST.....NOTHING ANY ONE SAID OR DID TO YOU WAS ABOUT YOU... ITS ALL ABOUT

THEM....ABRAHAM MASLOW TALKED ABOUT SELF-ACTUALIZATION WHAT HE TRYING SAY WAS

TO BE FREE FROM THE GOOD OPINION OF OTHERS, I BELIEVE WE MUST ALSO BE FREE OF

THE BAD OPINION OF OTHERS ALSO....FOR ALMOST ALL OF US AUTONOMY IS A

ILLUSION.......EVERY ONE IS IN A PROCESS OF EVOLUTION. SOME STAY STUCK AND A

FEW BREAK LOSE OF THE PAST AND ARE ABLE TO GROW AND FIND HAPPINESS....WHAT

KEEPS PEOPLE STUCK ARE THERE LIMITING BELIEFS AND FAVORITE FEELINGS THAT THEY

KEEP RECYCLING......... P.S. AS YOU GROW YOU WILL BE ATTRACTED TO A HEALTHIER

PERSON AND HEALTHIER PEOPLE WILL BE ATTRACTED TO YOU.....GOOD LUCK....

A hot-tempered mate can track you down to your space
like a bloodhound. Better just make yourself bullet-proof
(like Rob said^^).

Give them a voucher for -let's say- 10 counselling sessions ...
Make it 15 if it's real bad.
Alternatively you could just tell them the relationship is not going to last if her behaviour is

Blowing up at the slightest provocation is a real danger signal. It's not a deal killer initially.

When you say blow up over the slightest provocation if you're referring the your partner blowing up at you but otherwise are level headed then they may need to just adjust how they treat a partner. That can usually be accomplished with some clear boundaries, some counseling and practice to learn a new way to interact.

If they blow up at other people in front of you then run away. Just run away. They have decided that they want to interact with the world in that way and they will not likely change.

For my part, I consider carefully how a prospective partner treats others, how they treat serving staff at restaurants, how they treat irritating drivers on the road, how they speak about others. If they treat others poorly or speak about others poorly you'll soon be the one treated poorly or spoken poorly of.

Walk away, walk away very quickly.

Well to what degree of "Blow up" are we talking about..
When they are angry do they say that really irks me.
When they are angry do they yell??
When they are angry do they throw things?
When they are angry do they commit acts of violence?


The reason I ask.. I dated someone that told me I was to "angry" when I was would ask him to pick up his shoes out of the middle of the floor, if I forgot to put please and would you in front of any request.

That in the end was a bit much for me to deal with that I admitted I had an anger issue and I was too angry for him.

So I guess I have to ask what do you consider blowing up and "least provocation" because til this happened to me I thought I knew what it meant.

My advice...Get out now!...

'For my part, I consider carefully how a prospective partner treats others, how they treat serving staff at restaurants, how they treat irritating drivers on the road, how they speak about others. If they treat others poorly or speak about others poorly you'll soon be the one treated poorly or spoken poorly of. "


^^agree

I've been said to be hot tempered....but i don't do it at the slightest thing...if i had a hot tempered partner i would handle her quite well all the anger would vanish

Learn Karate.

Before you make any rash decisions try and broach the subject of poosible hormone problems. She maybe needs to get them balanced.

But whatever you do DO NOT mention PMT or insinuate she is a nutter cos she has her period or you may find yourself being chased round the house by a crazed carving knife waver - actually happened to a friend of mine no kidding

I notice most of you are a little more forgiving when it is perceived that a woman is the aggressor...WTF
Double standard here?

Everything about this is relative. As others have mentioned, one person's "slightest provocation" is another persons' egregious and repeated insult.

Then there is the range of psychological aspects to consider. Someone under great stress, will often have a hair trigger temper. Also, some people are frankly unbalanced psychologically, and only a lot of intensive therapy and medication will help.

There are other circumstantial physiological concerns, including variations on hunger. Someone with a dietary issue, who is eating enough quantity, but not a balanced diet, can end up with symptomatic testiness. People who regularly consume way too much caffeine, in order to get the energy they think they need to make it through their regular day, will tend to be that way too.

A sociopath can drive a normal person into becoming an easily infuriated person, by their being consistently oblivious to having insulted or even injured their companion.

All kinds of explanations. Need more details.

But in the end, the solution is to be found in the cause. Find the cause, and respond logically.

Pee on them. They will be so shocked and won't know what to say. That's when I walk out and go to bible study. Ahhhhh......the simple things in life.

OUR OPINION OF OURSELVES SELDOM MATCH'S WHAT OTHERS BELIEVE ABOUT US...THERE

BELIEF SYSTEM IS DIFFERENT....BEING FREE OF THE OPINION OF OTHERS IS PATH TO

SELF ACTUALIZATION AND ESCAPING THE ILLUSION OF AUTONOMY....